Women are "focused on looks" because men JUDGE you by them. Doesn't matter it it is "fair" or not, it just is. I have four grown sons and they have all told me "If I was a woman I'd do everything to look as good as possible, because men judge women by their looks." - 3/1/2013   9:46:26 AM

I've never understood why people are so focused on looks. It has nothing to do with the person inside. But people talk about it all day. I love getting older. I'm 59 and loving my life. I no longer worry about what others think about what I do. (Did they ever really care anyway?) It's so freeing. A group of us meet every day at the dog park and socailize and play with the dogs. And Sp is getting me healthy and fit. Enjoy your life wherever you are.
- 7/27/2012   3:05:49 PM

Great Blog! I love getting older-it beats the alternative! Spark On! - 2/4/2012   1:01:59 PM

I only obsessed about getting older when I turned 30. Turning 40 and 50 was absolutely not problem. When I turned 60, I looked at what my life had been (good), but this was the milestone that leads toward retirement. Oops! that's not in the cards. So I've had to backtrack a little.

As I've gotten older, I've had some health issues that make it just a little challenging. Can't clean my house all at once, have to break up my exercise into shorter sessions, and so on.

As far as surgery goes, yes, there are some areas I'd like to have fixed. Will doing that make me a better person? Absolutely not! That's just icing on the cake.

My advice, for what it's worth, is live each day to the fullest. Delight in the little things, stop and smell the roses. Give thanks for every day you have. You are God's creation, and wonderful. - 1/29/2012   4:57:17 PM

I am only 24 and I am freaking out about aging, I already started using anti-aging products. - 1/28/2012   3:17:25 PM

I've been noticing lately that my facial skin isn't "young" any more. I have lines that don't go away and it is getting "crinkley" looking in my cheeks. I really don't like that and I notice it. I'm 50 this year and single "again" for the last 14 years.
All of that being said, I've never even worn makeup regularly and I wouldn't know where to start. I don't mind the gray hairs--in fact, I kind of like them. It feels like I earned those!
Anyway, it is all part of "growing up" which I'm not sure I will ever do entirely (or that I want or need to). I look at my Dad and still see the same guy I saw when I was 18. May my sons say the same in 30 years!
There are many more important things to me than that skin I don't like. Supporting my family. Getting back to my ideal weight. Excercising and feeling more energized. Finding the next challenge at work.
I guess my face will just have to take care of itself! :) - 1/28/2012   9:01:30 AM

To be honest. I hate growing old. I turn 60 this year and the makeup just doesn't hide all the wrinkles and more.
Yes, I am vain and I would have a facelift in a haert beat if I had the money to be frivolous. I can make my body look it's best but I can't fix the wrinkles and the sagging that comes with the aging process.

I would gloadly go back to being 25 again but with the wisdon I have now.
I do however thank God every day for giving me life and for allowing me to be able to live healthy. I have had a wonderful life with travel and children, grandchildten and a loving husband and soul mate.

Every birthday I do have, I show my grandchildren how I can still get my legs up and stand on my head without any help. - 1/27/2012   11:54:39 PM

I think it depends on what parts of growing old are being referred to.

I've had an increasing number of white hairs since my early 30s at least. I don't dye my hair or try to change them. I notice that my hands don't look as smooth or that I have wrinkles at the sides of my eyes and I'm fine with those kinds of changes. Appearance items just don't bother me. I'll wrinkle and sag and go mostly gray and that's all completely fine.

Aches and aging related disorders worry / concern me a lot more. I see older people hobbling along with walkers and don't want to lose my mobility until as late as possible. I don't want to lose my ability to lift things, my balance, my vision and hearing. But unlike all the surgical procedures to nip, tuck, smooth, and the like ... there isn't any way to really stop the aging process in those areas.

So I work now to get as fit as possible, as active and alert as possible, in the hopes I'm not at 96 like my grandmother who passed last year and hadn't really stepped outside much in over a decade. I don't want to live a life incredibly diminished in scope because I didn't do something now while I could. - 1/27/2012   8:24:16 PM

Sometimes I do both - accept it AND fight it! I'd be happy to let my hair go gray and dress comfortably ALL the time, but there is such ageism if you are still (lucky enough to be) working. I absolutely agree with CIRANDELLA and anyone else who has opined on this blog that age is a state of mind. At 62 and with 32 years of marriage under my belt, I try not to think about where I've been, but where I still want to go!

My favorite, personal 'age' anecdote is this: when she was 6, I said to my daughter, "You were in diapers half your life." She got totally incensed that I reminded her of her 'baby years.' - 1/27/2012   7:39:58 PM

I think it's great to be old in BOTH body & mind/heart! I wouldn't want to be 21 again; what little wisdom I have has been hard-won over years of struggle, & I treasure it. I'm working hard to age well. I'm letting my hair go gray (Proverbs in the Bible says it's a crown of honor!), & I won't get plastic surgery to lose wrinkles or forestall a bit of normal sagging. Keeping my knee muscles strong so walking & occasional running don't hurt--THAT's important. Eating right to avoid high blood pressure, bad cholesterol, bone-density loss--THAT's important. Smiling & laughing a lot so the wrinkles in my face are good ones--THAT's important.

I don't always feel like it, but growing old is a mercy. - 1/27/2012   7:29:48 PM

This is why I have the strongest contempt possible for Hollywood and the entertainment/media/fashion industries - their mindset is so un-"age friendly" that it's scary ....... and don't even get me STARTED on their contempt towards us women! Of course, the way gals have been socialized from almost the beginning of time has been no help, either!

Everyone - PLEEZE - let's toss those stereotypical "gold watches" and damned rocking chairs, get out of your stinkin' houses and start LIVING LIFE! There is NO age limit on doing that! - 1/26/2012   4:08:21 AM

Age is a state of mind. I'm a perennial 15-year-old in a 90-year-old body :)
Any day I'm still above ground is a GREAT day, seriously! - 1/25/2012   9:19:21 PM

The healthier u are the better u look. - 1/25/2012   8:44:45 PM

I'll be 65 this summer, but in my mind I am still 21. I was in my late 20's before my mind realized that I wasn't a teenager any more. That said, I've never been one who cared about looks. I would rather be outside playing in the dirt than sitting in a styling chair. I have to remember to use lipstick; I don't have any other makeup in the house.

I thank God every morning because I can get up out of bed under my own power. I'm glad that I'm finished with worrying about attracting boys, putting up with teasing, experiencing TOM, and looking for a new job. Life is good! I can take a walk when I want and for as long as I want. I have time to do things that I've always wanted to do and learn things because I'm interested in them and not because someone else has decided I should learn about them. My body isn't ideal, but then it never was. For me it's the journey, not the package, that matters. - 1/25/2012   5:10:32 PM

I believe I will grow old, but never grow up! I just have too much fun with life. Now, I have to be honest here...I will be turning 50 next month! FIFTY! FIVE O!! I can't believe it! I get rather reflective about that thinking I have lived more than half my life. But I quickly remember that I am living the best years of my life with a wonderful husband, 5 kids, (5 dogs as well!!) and a much healthy happier life and 45 pounds gone forever! Thank you SparkPeople!! - 1/25/2012   2:01:41 PM

I totally struggle with the aging process! I'm so vain, and it bothers me that I'm getting older and that my body will eventually slow down, and my face get wrinkles or my hair go grey. I think it's a sin to think this way, so I'm trying to work on it. I mean, last year I turned 30 and I was almost in tears about it! And now I'd prefer for people to not ask me about my age - just wish me a Happy Birthday and leave it at that!
I envy people who embrace getting older - I think they're much more happy and therefore healthy-minded. - 1/25/2012   1:55:23 PM

Right now I am not trying really to "fight" the process. BUT i do want to take care of myself better, and my skin is one of them. I know there is a fine line between taking care of yourself and fighting the process. I think i'd love to age gracefully and take care of myself better.

on the other hand, if I was offered plastic surgery - for health reasons - i would take it in a second. - 1/25/2012   1:00:35 PM

Amber512, I used to have the same problem! Now I love it when people take me for early 50s instead of nearly 67! Oh yeah, I've EARNED the wrinkles!! - 1/25/2012   12:52:40 PM

No, I welcome my age. Sure, I'd love to have the body of a 20 year old and i'dlive to get my Jolson fixed but with my age has come wisdom, peace, contentment. It's nice to see all of my laugh and smile lines and know I earned those. Turning 50 was freeing! - 1/25/2012   12:19:25 PM

I'm 62 and if I had the money, I'd go get a facelift tomorrow. Have nothing against getting back to where I was. But getting to a normal weight and exercise is what I can do. - 1/25/2012   11:15:27 AM

I think that attitude has a lot to do with how "old" you are. I remember as a teenager thinking that my stepgrandmother was a young person in an old body--she was in her late 70's at the time. She had a young mind. She kept up on current events and fully supported activities of our church's youth group. My husband's stepgrandmother will be 108 this year. She doesn't move around like she did a few years ago and her eyesight's not a good as it was, but she has a young attitude. I turned 60 the other, but mentally I FEEL much younger. However, I don't think I'm OLD; I'm mature, I dress and act my age (not trying to fit myself into teeny-bopper styles). I don't WANT to be young again, but I want to FEEL young. By making wise and healthy food choices and exercising, I can accomplish that feeling. - 1/25/2012   8:34:11 AM

It took me a LONG time as a child to not think I was ugly - I grew up with a very pretty older sister, and I was overshadowed and overlooked. I was 14 when I realized I wasn't ugly. (I look back at photos and realize I was an adorable child, just not gorgeous.) Anyway, so yes, I'm doing what I can to stave off the aging process. I get monthly facials to keep my youthful skin. I use some rather pricey face products for the same reason. (Vitamin C for the face!) I also color my hair, because at 57 this is my last chance to still be a redhead.

But I don't compete with 20-somethings - if I can't reach something, or can't carry something way heavy, I ask for help. I dress in age-appropriate fashion. I stay fit and healthy, and work to stay as strong as I am currently.

But the wrinkles and the grey hair and the age spots? I fight those. - 1/25/2012   5:07:37 AM

like my mother wrote on her birthday card to me when I turned 30: "Congratulations, you are a year older than your mother!". Ok, I will never be able to look like I am 29 now that I am well beyond 30, but given the stocked shelves in the cosmetic department in every department, drug and grocery store, I am not alone. Sadly in two years, I will be a year older than the age my mother was when she died from cancer. At that time, I plan to look younger than my age and be happy in my skin because I am taking care of myself and using whatever modern chemistry and good SparksPeople living can provide! To feel young and look young -- kindles a happy energy inside me!! - 1/25/2012   2:00:09 AM

My Nana always took great care of her skin. I can remember as a child spending the night and sleeping in bed with her. She always removed her make-up, cleaned her face and put some type of skin cream on. She had lovely skin well into her late 70's. I have done the same since I was a teenager and will 56 in March. Yes, there are a few wrinkles, but I have earned everyone of them (I use to lay out in the CA sun as much as possible, big mistake of youth, but all my friends did the same thing, using baby oil).
I don't think I would use botox because I am allergic to so many medication, so why risk it. Besides the women I have seen that do fillers and botox don't look real, lips too large and face's frozen in place. Not natural at all. I have gained weight over the years, so I am no longer a size 3-5, like I was until my late 20's and b/4 kids and having Lupus (but I am alive when the doctors said I would be dead by the age of 40). People always tell how lovely I am and never guess my age correctly, so I guess I am doing something right? I am proud to be aging gracefully. - 1/25/2012   12:58:44 AM

My first reaction to this blog was "Seeing the picture, I can see that this article doesn't relate to me!" I'm 65, and the thought of the 20-something in the photo worrying about aging seems like a bad joke.

Actually, I would love to have smooth skin with no wrinkles, but I prefer my wrinkles and sagging skin to a strange, surgically-enhanced face. As for my body, I'm happier with it now than I ever was in my life. I'd hate to return to my teenage self-consciousness and obsession with looking exactly like everyone else. Today I am active and I love shopping in 2nd hand shops for wonderful and outrageous clothes. I look good and feel great! Well, most of the time. I do have to be careful, especially with exercise, to work up slowly and not overdo things or I pay for it later. Does this mean that I embrace aging? I'm not sure, but I certainly love my life more now than ever before, and I value my abilities, even though running a marathon is not on my bucket list. - 1/24/2012   11:52:44 PM

Funny you say this - I don't have a problem until someone makes some type of reference to my age. But the body thing - that's a different story . Having lost a bunch of weight and being the healthiest in my life (btw - I'm 53) I was just telling my sister, I tried on some pants tonight at a great sale - store closing and didn't buy any - the area around my hips were too tight, while the waist was too big. I don't have an extremely large rear end - but I have an "apron" of fat or as my sister suggested skin from having lost 110 pounds. That is extremely frustrating. Nicer clothes that aren't baggy on me "show" that front pouch - bulge - what ever you want to call it and I'm extremely self conscious about it. I'm afraid to have major surgery and can't afford it. It's not causing an irritation, so I don't think insurance will pay for it. I need help in finding a way to either get rid of it - or deal with it.

Also by the way - my 50th birthday was the BEST! - 1/24/2012   11:29:32 PM

My first eve encounter with the gym was 3 years agfo when I turned 65, now I am a regular attendee 5 days per week, and a few months ago increased my cardio by another 20 minutes daily taking it to 45 minutes. Since I was 30 I started showing grey hair and have dyed my hair for 36 years, then a year ago I decided to go au naturel, and yes I am very white, but don;t have to worry about the condition of my hair anymore and am saving $$$. Aging is an attitude, just accept and make the best of each year as it comes, rewards come with all ages. - 1/24/2012   11:01:04 PM

Okay.. I admit it... I do NOT look forward to birthdays.. however with that said, I appreciated soooo much the message I received from Sparkpeople on my birthday that said "Don't count the years... but make the years count". That message really came at the right time. Birthdays we have no control over... but making the years count? Yes, that is something we can do! Thank you SP!! - 1/24/2012   8:46:42 PM

I hope more people in their 50s, 60s, and 70s respond to this article! I will be 70 in March and I have never fought the aging process except with dieting. I always have to diet to keep weight off, I can't seem to get on a maintenance plan. And I think no matter what we do to ourselves to "look" young it doesn't stop the aging process! - 1/24/2012   4:11:54 PM

It is hilarious to read a blog on aging, written by someone who is SO young!! I'm hoping in 30 or 40 years, she writes another one on this topic!

I don't "struggle" with aging. Every day I get up and do the best I can with what I've got. Here and there, there have begun to be some limitations. BUT wisdom truly DOES come with age, if you pay attention and learn some things along the way. I have earned every last wrinkle and age spot, every stretch mark and bit of sagging skin. Would I want to go back and be 30 again? NO WAY! - 1/24/2012   2:05:21 PM

I'm 40 and people tell me all the time I look younger. I think "clean living," non-smoking, proper hydration (3L/day) and SUNSCREEN since the early 90s are do it for me. :) - 1/24/2012   2:00:16 PM

I hope to look older! Even though I'm almost 30 I get carded practically every time I step outside. God forbid I walk near a school because they will ask why I'm not in class (even if it's a middle school!) It's frustrating to be thought of us young and immature constantly. But maybe if I start to look older more people will take me seriously! - 1/24/2012   1:49:05 PM

I love birthdays. For myself it isn't a battle with getting older, more of a surprise at how fast the time has gone by. - 1/24/2012   1:45:49 PM

I'm 47 and I love the 40s. Sure I've got wrinkles, sure the body doesn't recuperate as fast as it used to but I wouldn't go back to being 20. I was thinner, in better shape and without wrinkles or white hair, but I didn't like myself as I do now. I am more comfortable in my own skin that I ever was.
I don't feel old I'm just different.
I almost lost my life a few times. I have scars to remember it. I was told I should get rid of them. I feel they are badges of honor. won in battle for my own life. they and the grey hair and the wrinkles are reminders that life is there to be lived and savor. Looks aren't THAT important. LIFE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING - 1/24/2012   1:35:35 PM

I'm not sure if I'm fighting it or not but it seems I'm always fighting. I do look young for my age and I know i keep in shape. My grandson gets me to play with him and he says even his mom doesn't. I play some of the games I used to but I have to take breaks. I feel good for my age and yes I put makeup on and look good that way too. I'm 62 and I play teatherball with my grandson. You can do it too. Hope - 1/24/2012   1:20:23 PM

I like to think of how much I've got to show for my age: 3 terrific kids in their teens; 20 wonderful years of marriage - and a happy marriage to boot; a husband that I enjoy spending time with. So I'm working on my health to make sure that the next 20 years of marriage are even better than the first and that I have the strength and energy to enjoy the grandkids that may be in my future. Here's to another year! - 1/24/2012   1:05:15 PM

There are good things that come with being older, and I feel lucky to be alive considering the health scare bullets I have dodged, so on one hand I am proud of my age - all 52 years of it. I consider myself mentally young for my age, but not physically. I'd like to feel better about my physical appearance and 'look good for my age' (no desire to look a lot younger), so I am more than willing to get a little 'work' done when I reach my goal weight. - 1/24/2012   12:48:27 PM

I always have to laugh when I see people in their 20s, 30s, 40s talk about 'being older' - heck, my SON is 47 years old! I learned long ago that age is a state of mind - I hike with people in their 80s and even 90s who leave 20-somethings in their dust - come on folks, the only way to avoid 'aging' is to die and who's ready for that? Embrace the process and enjoy it - don't be afraid of grey hair, it's as beautiful as any other color. I LOVE my grey hair and feel like I earned every sag, bag and wrinkle I've got. And guess what - I hope to collect a lot more of them before I'm done with this life. It's time to write 'new rules of aging' so let's all enjoy changing attitudes about getting older!

I will add, however, that I think there is NOTHING WRONG with plastic surgery, hair coloring, make-up or whatever else someone wants to feel better about themselves. Heaven knows there has been too much emphasis on 'looks' but that's not going to change soon and EVERYONE does things to look better, whether it's as drastic as a full-body/face redefinition or as simple as combing our hair or brushing our teeth - there's no way to stop the aging process but sometimes people need a little boost. Have a great life and LIVE every minute of it you can! - 1/24/2012   11:30:45 AM

Sometimes, I forget that I'm 33, but I don't usually mind getting older. For what it's worth, I am definately in a better place than I was when I was growing up. I am pretty happy to be getting older, as I get wiser, more open-minded and positive the older I get. I have my moments where I wish I was still in my 20's, but I tend to get over that quickly! Not so happy with my weight/health right now, but taking baby steps to change that, but nevertheless, happy to be getting older! - 1/24/2012   11:27:44 AM

I am 56 and in the best shape of my life! I think attitude has so much to do with age. I feel good and project a happy & positive outlook......most people are surprised that I am in my 50's. Nothing wrong with surgery or trying to look younger but I'll take every wrinkle and stretch mark! I earned them....... - 1/24/2012   11:19:53 AM

I used to dwell on getting older. I am now 55 and don't dwell on it any longer. I have
some age spots and my skin is getting thinner as I get older. I do make sure that I wash my face twice a day and put moisterizer on. I use a lot of cream for dry skin.
I would like to age like my Mom. She is beautiful inside and out. She doesn't believe in surgery just aging naturally. She believes that God wanted her be herself.
Thanks for the blog. - 1/24/2012   11:03:58 AM

I agree with those that say it's easy to have such a postitive outlook when you are still young. I too remember having that attitude.....but as I look at turning 60 next month I look in the mirror and wonder who that woman is...where did that older woman come from? If it weren't for the recovery time, I would have many things done such as surgery on my upper arms, face, etc. I do continue to tell myself that being healthy is most important but it's hard not to want to look younger, refreshed and healthy on the outside as well. - 1/24/2012   10:46:17 AM

It's very easy to say the effects of aging are no big deal while you're relatively young and gravity has not caught up with you. Wait until you're putting on blush and realize that the skin is right above your jawline. I was never a beauty, but I get very depressed every day when I look in the mirror and see huge bags under my eyes and skin that looks like an elephant trunk between my eyes. I am thinking about a facelift once I reach goal weight. - 1/24/2012   10:30:47 AM

Fight it all the time. I admit to having surgery, a few times. Nothing wrong with it. - 1/24/2012   10:26:50 AM

It's wonderful to read all of the comments and realize that age is just a mile marker - it doesn't define who we are or where we are going. - 1/24/2012   10:17:25 AM

I am 68 years young and almost 50 years married to my DH. We adore each other, our appearence has changed but we are as much in love as we wre when engaged. We have 3 great sons but we are in Maine and they are in the SW, they moved not us. They could not find work in Maine.
I have sensitivities to make-up and chemicals. In my youth i longed to try them again.Tried with dire consequences. Wised up to listen to my body and now people always gasp when i say my age. I LOVE IT, I have always loved my body and never regretted any stretch line there. My sons are worth every wrinkle. Only down side to old age is my athletics in my youth have given way to pain in my joints. We were never taught to take care of our muscles, warm up. cool down stretches etc, were never a priority. Take care and listen to your body Pat in Maine. - 1/24/2012   10:06:50 AM

I am thrilled to say that at 48 years old, I am in better physical shape now than I was when I was a teenager. I'm in better shape than a lot of men my age or even younger. that's an ego boost for me.

However, while improved eating habits and regular exercise have helped "slow" the aging process, I haven't escaped it. I notice it in particular whenever we do side angle or inversion poses in yoga. I look in the mirror and wonder WHY is the skin on my face sagging !!! YIKES !! And why do I have hairs growing in places they have no business being. But, that's a rant for another time. LOL !!

I'd like to think that I'm embracing my age. I've never been ashamed of my age and I've never felt a reason to hide my age. I think there is too much emphasis on youth. How many times have we heard that 40 is the new 30 ? Okay, we're taking better care of ourselves, but why is it all about age ? Why can't we celebrate whatever age we are ? Why do we have to strive to be younger and younger ? There was a time when a woman grew older, she was considered a highly valued and respected member of the community. These days, we have to hide our age because if we don't we'll be put out to pasture. How many people lost their jobs to someone younger just because they looked better ? Probably more than we'd like to admit.

Personally, I accept that I'm growing older. the difference is that I too hope to grow old gracefully so that I'll be young at heart if not in body. I want to be like those classic cars from the 1950s. If I take care of myself, I hope to be operating long past my so called expiration date.





- 1/24/2012   9:55:02 AM

The only time that my age starts to really bother me is during my birthday month. It started last year when I turned 35. And I'm sure that I'll feel the same this year. I don't have anything outside of gray hairs to show for it right now (and boy do I feel blessed and grateful for Olay ;). I want to embrace my age, but it's not always easy. - 1/24/2012   9:49:37 AM

I am turning 40 soon & have been thinking about how I want to continue aging gracefully. For me it is more about spending my time doing the things that make me happy. Instead of wasting time trying to please others, or even just doing nothing, I realize now that I should be living my life to make me smile everyday!
Don't waste time dwelling on things that won't matter in the end. - 1/24/2012   9:48:45 AM

I had this idea that when I lost my weight I'd look 21 again. I'm now 62 and I just don't look like that, but I have had a couple of cosmetic procedures to help me kid myself that I still look young. You are still young!! Write again in 20 years. - 1/24/2012   9:30:24 AM