Dealing with the Diet Police

3SHARES

By: , SparkPeople Blogger
3/23/2011 6:03 PM   :  193 comments   :  31,985 Views

By Beth Donovan (~INDYGIRL)

Have you ever been given the third degree about whether you should be eating a certain food or be adding it to your shopping basket? “Do you really need that?”

“Should you be eating that on your diet?”

Was it like a scene from a movie where the person was just short of a bright light and a table to bang their fist on, or more slick like the subtle questioning of James Bond? Needless to say, those are typical "diet police" interrogation questions, designed to keep law and order and take control of your world.

Who are the diet police and why do they pay so much attention to what is on our plates and in our shopping carts? Why do they question us in a friendly, yet conniving manner about our well being and progress? Why do they make comments at family dinners and in public that belittle us about our weight or what we are eating or not eating? Why do they blame all of our problems on our weight, as if we couldn’t have any “normal” problems or issues?

The diet police are various sects of people who all share one thing in common; they believe they can make better choices for you than you or I can. Most believe that any means necessary might need to be employed in the name of saving you from yourself. Their intentions are not always bad, but can be harmful, just the same.

Some diet police will do or say hurtful things “For your own good,” thinking that humiliating you enough will motivate you to change. They do this because they feel it is their job to take care of you. Instead, their constant belittling of you fosters a feeling of inferiority and shame. This simply makes many of us build up a wall and eat in secret and isolate ourselves, feeling as if we are not good enough.

Many diet police don’t believe people can make sound choices about your own nutrition. They believe in one way, their own. You should follow their diet, because it’s the one that works. They think that if you could just eat right and exercise, everything would be okay. They don’t understand the complexities of weight loss and the psychological impact weight has on a person. It is a simple formula, actually. Calories in and calories out is the formula, BUT not everyone metabolizes at the same rate and not everyone is subject to the same eating or exercise rules. This doesn’t even take into account depression, injury, chronic pain, and eating disorders, among other things. Losing weight is a very individualized thing.

Diet police believe they have the right to visually search your shopping cart and plate for offenses. They still have that “Good food” and “Bad food” mentality. They can be legalistic and not understand the concept of moderation, thus judging a person on what they do choose to eat.

Most diet police have never had a major problem with their weight, and therefore do not know the struggles that people who are significantly overweight face. Many lack the experiences to be able to empathize and motivate those they are trying to police.

Diet police doctors are a pet peeve of mine. They are the doctors that think you wouldn’t get sick if you weren’t overweight or that all of your illness would magically disappear with some diet and exercise. While diet and exercise will help you and boost your immune system, keep in mind that thin people get sick too and overweight people deserve the same medical care and compassion when they go to the doctor.

Diet police can start bad eating habits from the shame they cause. From my experience and others I’ve known, we’ve hidden food, binged, had bulimia, anorexia, compulsive overeating, felt shamed, eaten alone in isolation, avoided gatherings, not sought health care, avoided working out in public and believed we would never find love. So far, I have overcome all of the above and so have a few of my friends. Some still suffer and go to therapy to undo damage that was done by their diet police. If you have diet police checking you for offenses or “Trying to take care of you,” by improper means, have a talk with them. Explain you are on a fantastic new plan called SparkPeople and you know exactly what you are doing. No more policing allowed, but love without shame is always welcomed. EXPLAIN to them how they CAN help you in a positive manner and SHOW them SparkPeople. You may make a difference in their life.

How do you deal with the "diet police"?


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Comments

  • 193
    It is worst with people, who does not understand that they are doing this, and thinks they wishes you well - for example, old relative, who one day says that you should lose weight and you should not be eating something, but in the evening prepares calory-bomb home meal and does not understand, why you refuse to eat it. Even after infinite reminders, that I would like to eat according myself, next day the same scenario repeats... - 10/30/2013   1:56:21 AM
  • BITTERMELON3
    192
    This hit a cord with me. I grew up in a Southeast Asian country where a lot of people are slim. And a lot of the population have a diet police mentality. It started when I reached puberty at 11 and starting getting my curves, I'm an ectomorph so I'm naturally curvy and have boobs. I'm not flat like most of the population. A relative called me a whale when I was 5'2 and weighed 110 pounds. That went on for most of my life even when I was at a normal weight. This led to yo-yo dieting. Now I live in another county and finally feel that I can lose the weight, I don't have to endure the diet police and naysayers. I can make use of what science has learned about weight loss rather than having to listen to all the helpful "advice". - 8/21/2013   3:44:48 AM
  • 191
    i dont have a diet where i refuse to eat certain things. i have cut out soda but that was mostly because if i drink it thats all i drink. so to add other things i cut it out. i believe i can have the sweets i love and other stuff as long as i dont go over calories. i also do a few more minutes of cardio just to make myself feel better. i love to bake. cakes cookies cheesecakes everything. i dont want to give up my passion for baking because i wont eat the foods. i just dont make a lot of the foods or i give most of it away. or i bake with my best friend and we split the goodies between our two households. well three since we have another friend who has little kids and she cant cook or anything so we bring goodies to her lol.
    my mom did the police thing and she was pretty bad herself. my grandma would buy me clothes and say you can have those if your not to fat for them. used to make me so angry. but honestly i dont talk to either of them anymore for different reasons so i dont hear those comments anymore. my fiances parents are bad to him tho. they are both really overweight and unhealthy. his mom tries weight watchers every few months and cant stick to it. they look at my fiance who is overweight too but not like them and pat his stomach and make some comment about how hes getting bigger or some such crap. hes been losing inches and weight without really trying lately so im proud of him. i cook healthy foods for him and with his two jobs hes losing the weight. i dont allow anyone to police me anymore. my grandpa will joke with me and my finace about our weight but i know hes harmless because he makes the same jokes about himself lol. he knows hes overweight. he doesnt care lol. he does enough to stay healthy thats all he cares about. - 3/20/2013   3:13:06 PM
  • TLANE85
    190
    My husband doesnt police..but he does not understand how hard it is to lose weight. But he is at a healthy weight but he has the absolute WORST eating habits. He had a heart attack 3 years ago and still refuses to believe that his eating habits are a big cause of it. It worries me for him and myself because if you look at the 2 of us I look like I should be the heart patient and not him. But he doesnt say too much to be about my eating because he still smokes (even though he KNOWS he should quit). He knows he can live without smoking but no one can live without eating. I was really skinny as a kid and my mom and sister were both overweight and I'm sure I policed them without meaning too. My mom is still overweight but my sister has lost over 100 lbs with gastric bypass. But she has made the dietary changes to keep it off for over 2 years and her husband lost over 100 lbs with WW with her cooking. I seem to be struggling with the emotional toil of it all. This is my first comment and I really enjoy reading the blogs. - 5/14/2012   11:02:46 AM
  • TNELLY37
    189
    I can't control what other people say, but I can control my reaction to it. For those moms, dad's, boyfriends, husband's who are diet police, you need to examine the reason why you are a diet police. Are you a diet police because you care about your relative's heath? Or are you a diet police because you want your daughter to be popular or want her to make the cheer leading squad? Are you concerned about your wife's health? Or are you determined to turn her into a thin, trophy wife? There is a difference. - 2/20/2012   9:00:56 PM
  • 188
    I'd comment something smart like, "how's the drinking going?" or "when the last time you had sex?" or I might lie and say something like..."I've already lost a 100 lbs without YOUR help!!" or maybe.."I can run a 5K, how far can you run?" HeeHee - 1/6/2012   3:37:42 PM
  • SANDYKAYEJ
    187
    I, too. have experienced doctors that didn't feel like I had a right to their care. I had a shoulder injury and the doctor told me I looked like I had diabetes and gave me a pamplet on the frozen shoulder syndrome. I walked out. grrrrr..I have realtives that can't stand to even look at me, because of my weight. I don't like the diet po-po. - 11/30/2011   12:53:22 AM
  • 186
    My parents and younger sister are mine. My mom and sister have never had weight issues and my mother even shows preference for my sister because she is skinny and I'm not. Recently I stepped on the scale and was feeling proud of myself for reaching 27 pounds lost. I wanted to share the good news with someone and told my dad. Instead of being encouraging and saying something positive like "Great job", he just looked me up and down and said "You need to tone up". I guess because he couldn't really see the weight loss (I have a lot to lose). Needless to say, that deflated my good feelings about myself and I found myself sitting in my bedroom with tears in my eyes. Diet police never really know just how damaging their comments can be sometimes. And the thing is sometimes the comments aren't even the "For your own good" kind. Sometimes there's nothing constructive about them. - 8/16/2011   3:31:38 PM
  • 185
    Well the doctor's job (he swore an oath) is to keep you healthy. Yes, we all deserve equal health care regardless of gender, skin colour or size, absolutely! Unfortunately, the doctor is also obligated to tell you that having too much excess weight is unhealthy :(

    Anyways, diet police should MIND THEIR OWN BUSINESS. - 7/20/2011   12:17:57 PM
  • NEWSUSAN2119
    184
    I have never been diet policed. If some person were to confront me with unsolicited negative commentary I think I probably would say: 'I can work on getting healthy and slim but the fat in YOUR HEAD will NEVER go away. - 6/10/2011   7:52:05 AM
  • 183
    it's because of the "diet police officers", i was kinda not into diets and stuff. not blaming them of course it's my fault but i deffo wasn't incouraged by their nagging and "advising". mostly just put off. everybody (the dieters and he diet police) should understand that we're doing this for us!!! - 6/7/2011   3:28:37 PM
  • 182
    I do not monitor other adults. The only person I may have monitored was my son when he was young - but that was my job as mom. Most adults know what they are supposed to eat and what they aren't - knowone likes a nag!
    I'm not sure about folks having issues with Drs. isn't that their job??? - 5/23/2011   8:35:26 AM
  • ANPRA89
    181
    The worst ones are those who push you to eat a little extra. - 5/22/2011   1:57:07 AM
  • 180
    SQUISHY_GIRL - just remember, even apparently healthy people can develop diabetes and have to change their lives.

    Long before SP a co-worker had commented on my weight loss then looked at the salad I was building and said, 'cheese is fattening.' I told her, 'This is what I always eat. The cheese is my protein.' - 5/16/2011   9:54:31 PM
  • LIRAETH
    179
    I can totally relate to this. My fiance's sister lost a lot of wieght and now thinks it is her right to make comments about his wieght and food choices everytime we see her. Even though we are both beginning our journey to weight loss people seem to forget that it won't happen over night! - 5/5/2011   8:46:07 AM
  • 178
    The ones that drive me nuts are the family members or friends who push you to have "just a little piece of pie" or "just a cookie" or add "just a little more to your plate," then turn around and tell you you need to lose weight. - 5/4/2011   4:48:00 PM
  • 177
    What I find annoying about the diet police problem not only them saying that you should should eat this or that or only this or that amount but also commenting on exactly where you should lose weight from. As if I have a choice in the matter where the weight drops first or how it is distributed! So irritating! - 5/2/2011   4:25:17 PM
  • 176
    Although I am sure that the diet police in our lives mean well but they dont understand the confusion they create while deflating personal confidence and the guilt that ensues as a result of their "comments". - 5/1/2011   9:46:35 PM
  • RUNESHADOW
    175
    I don't think Diet Police are helpful in any way. If someone ASKS for support, encouragement, reminders, whatever, that's different, and the helper is not Diet Police. Unsolicited comments are rude and I wish I had the courage to respond snappily and deal with them. Shame is not helpful to anyone, and comments from strangers, bosses, coworkers, friends, whomever, can produce shame in the targeted person. As some have commented, we may feel resentful and end up eating more or the "wrong" thing out of spite, even though it only hurts ourselves. We may feel defensive, and that doesn't help us, either.

    Parents are in a different position, having to educate their children, wanting them to make wise choices, but they can do so gently and kindly, and not act as Diet Police. They can avoid the shaming. It would be ideal to be able to talk with kids about food choices, about dealing with emotional eating vs hunger, about moderation, and so on. They can encourage more physical activity, find what appeals to their children, make opportunities available, explain the consequences of eating too much of certain foods or of too little physical activity, and so on, but the choices are ultimately up to the individuals, and love, respect and acceptance from parents will do far more good healthwise than any strict policing.

    I think there is no place for Diet Police in our already stressful, judgmental society. We need more kindness, not less. And again, if you want a support team or folks to encourage you, that is a different matter, but also should be handled kindly, not nastily. Snide remarks are completely unhelpful. We do not know what may be troubling another person and I personally don't want to push someone over the edge with a thoughtless remark. Don't fool yourself with the rationalization that it is "constructive criticism." It is not.

    I felt defensive the times I encountered Diet Police, and later felt even worse because I had not been able to stand up for myself. And often self-medicated with food, or felt shame "sneaking" what I wanted.

    I wecome computer advice and suggestions when they are phrased pleasantly, not demeaningly. I also feel shamed when someone gives me computer advice and acts as though "any idiot" should know how to defrag or whatever. I just don't think we should police other people's lives, regarding fashion, food choices, activities, partners, or whatever. If you are excited about SP, fine, tell folks you found something that works for you and that you'd be glad to share information if they want it. Then be graceful with whatever response you get. That is respectful and kind, and we sure need more of those!

    Thanks for a great blog from a great blogger! - 4/30/2011   9:50:28 PM
  • HEAMAMA
    174
    The first "Diet Police" I ever met was my mother who put me on a diet when we came home from a medical check up where my growth was in the 160th percentile at age 8. She was convinced that I was fat and spent a lot of time counting the 1200 calories I was allotted a day. One of the worst experiences of my childhood was a family reunion dinner where my mother had the waitress take away my salad because it had cheese on it then changed my dinner order in front of the entire family.
    The next year I grew 13 inches and was skinny again but I never felt good eating anything around my mother again. At age 10, I was in the hospital for Anorexia. I weighed 92 pounds and I was 5'8". I am 35 years old now and I still struggle to get the proper caloric intake every day.
    Oddly enough what helped me was having children and being very aware of how easy it is to hurt them. I make sure they all know it's good to eat (no matter what it is) in the right proportions. I absolutely refuse to let my children ever allow any "diet police" in their lives to control the way they live their lives. - 4/30/2011   2:52:33 PM
  • BEXYPOOCH
    173
    Diet Police are trying to help! Sometimes to loose weight you simply need to face the fact that you need to eat less. Because they are fitter and healthier than you perhaps says that they might actually have some good advice. You wouldn't get upset if someone helped you defrag your PC, why get upset if someone wants to help you loose weight? If you're simply sick of busy bodies poking into your business fair enough, but I like the support I'm receiving from friends and family to loose weight. - 4/27/2011   3:01:30 AM
  • 172
    My stepdad is terrible for it. Comments such as "oh they're diet crisps then are they ha ha ha" said in a jokey manner but there's nothing funny about it! As someone who does fairly physical work and has never been overweight he has no concept of dieting and weight loss and its pretty unfair for him to comment on what I eat which I struggle with and have done since my late teens. I do end up snapping at him at times but I'll try to take his comments in my stride in future! - 4/25/2011   2:44:18 PM
  • 171
    This makes me sad. I act as diet police to my parents out of desperation that they will want to start the same journey I am on. I did not realize I am doing more harm than help. :( - 4/20/2011   11:34:19 AM
  • 170
    I must confess that I am a member of the diet police. I am harsh on my youngest daughter. When we have dinner, she will eat whatever carb there is for dinner and omit the vegetables. I often find myself harping on her eating habits because I know how unhealthy they are. I try to set a good example for her. I stock the fridge with fruits and vegetables but she refuses to eat them. I have tried making dinners that consist of only vegetables to try to get her to eat. Instead she will take her allowance and hit the fast food spots. I try to explain to her that my critique of her eating habits only comes from a good place. I try to explain to her how difficult my battle with food has been and that I don't want her to have to have the same struggles that I have had. The last time she went to the doctor her blood pressure was borderline. At sixteen, I don't want her to have to be forced to take medication for something that she can control by not making the wrong choices. - 4/16/2011   7:44:29 PM
  • FRECKLETOWN
    169
    My diet police are my mom and sister although I know they mean well. It is still hard though. - 4/15/2011   5:38:05 PM
  • 168
    I had to get my routine annual women's exam from a doctor I'd never met before. As I was up in the stirrups, she says "If you lose some weight, you wouldn't have high blood pressure." I could point out all the things wrong with this situation, but I'll just say this... Society reminds me every day how fat I am. I don't really need this lady in her pearl necklace and fancy sweater telling me something I already know. It stung a little extra because at the time I weighed the lowest I've weighed since high school. I didn't say anything, but I wanted to kick her in the head. - 4/9/2011   1:21:34 AM
  • 167
    My diet police was my mom, and still is even though she doesn't actively police me anymore, and to her credit, she was trying to teach me good eating habits, but youth and being stubborn mixed with divorce and comfort food won out. I struggled with my weight and self esteem and my mom would take me to this weight program, that weight program, this nutritionist, that jazzercise program, etc...from my perspective I felt like she was constantly reminding me of how inadequate I was, a I ran right into the arms of a super size Big Mac meal for comfort. Hindsight being what it is, I am very mindful of the lessons she tried to teach me then, and to pass on those lessons to my own kids. It's a slippery slope, being the diet police. There is no BEST way to tell a friend or loved one you'd like them to eat better. For some reason we find it easier to tell someone to lay off the booze, quit smoking or get straight from heroin, but food is OFF LIMITS! Don't tell ME how to eat! (as I shove a handful of chili fries in my mouth after being dumped).....the whole food thing is so personal that it's really up to YOU, the eater, to police yourself. - 4/6/2011   11:05:51 AM
  • 166
    I won't front, I was diet police. But I gave up. You can lead a horse to water but you cannot make it drink! - 4/4/2011   3:20:28 PM
  • 165
    My diet police is very near and dear to me so it's hard to fend off the attack when she tells me that she knows better what is good for me (this is a new habit that she's developed over the past year or so and extends to other areas of my life as well). I try to redirect the conversation to the 'everybody's body is different' discussion and stay positive. I believe her judgement is a control response to stress she has been experiencing. Still I miss having my supportive friend and wish she would realize how her trying to 'fix' me is driving us apart. - 4/2/2011   10:23:51 PM
  • 164
    My diet police sets me up to overindulge so that they can bust me! Now when I am busted I just look them in the eye and say (and I do journal my every daily bite now) "I have written this into my food plan, I do need to lose 15 lbs you know!...I can eat what I want but I am watching my portions" It's almost as if it bothers them now that I am controlling HOW MUCH of their junk food I (do or not) consume ! - 4/1/2011   9:54:14 PM
  • ROYANN44
    163
    the surgeon i work with has a bad habit of being critical about our lunches in our surgery break room. I have worked in this department for 9 years, when i started I had just returned from maternity leave after my 5th baby. I weighed 220 lbs, i lost to 179 and gained it all back again. Now i have kept my weight in the 160's for a year and have stopped most of the habits that "diet policing" push you to do. I still have a dresser drawer of chocolate, but i have found a lot of healthier ways to deal with the way that diet policing makes you feel. Maybe i will get that drawer emptied out this easter, to my kids easter basket. What should i fill that drawer back up with???? - 4/1/2011   2:54:10 AM
  • 162
    I've probably been guilty of diet policing. I've also been the victim. I was on a great weight control plan and a female coworker commented that the cheese and eggs I was adding to my salad were very high in fat. I said, 'It's on my plan.' With greens, mushrooms and other filling fibers, I needed the protein to fill my meal.

    Now when I watch what someone eats, I'm looking for ideas to help me. - 3/31/2011   7:11:49 PM
  • CRAZYMOMMY1222
    161
    I think I have been guilty of policing. I have a new respect for anyone trying to lose weight. - 3/31/2011   3:30:34 PM
  • DIJENRY
    160
    I don't need anyone else telling me what I shouldn't eat...I am my own diet police. I will still eat and then say why did you eat that and beat myself up over it. I am getting better and am trying not to "diet". I would just like to eat healthy and exercise but still be able to have a treat and not feel so bad about it. I am trying to learn how to like myself for who I am not my waist size. I am finding that the closer I get to 40 the better I am getting!! - 3/31/2011   1:26:55 PM
  • 159
    My kids are my major diet police. Strangely enough, mine are the ones who tell me to eat more. I don't have a good or healthy eating habit, so my kids help me. My husband too. I found out a while ago that I am diabetic, so I have had to really change my habits. But, in my case; it's better for me!

    They all want me to be healthy, and happy. So, I'll take my diet police!
    - 3/31/2011   10:38:38 AM
  • DAWNRH1
    158
    I notice many women on here with the same problem - our husbands are the worst diet police and frequently the most hurtful because they know all of our vulnerabilities. I have the same issue. One thing I would disagree with or maybe think the author neglected to mention is that most diet police are thin or have never had weight issues. I know numerous diet police who have weight issues of their own. My husband is one of those people. He's struggled with an eating disorder and was too thin as a teenager but he still doesn't get it and he's super sensitive so I can't say anything to him at all about maybe trying to lose some weight. I think that makes e comments/policing even worse! - 3/31/2011   9:44:00 AM
  • K_RENEE
    157
    I have a Diet Police officer that I work with and when she does that, I throw it right back at her! And she hates it! I think it's funny because it's one of those situations where she can "dish it up, but she can't take it" (no pun intended lol). Or else I will grill her about her financial situation, since she's terrible with her money. - 3/30/2011   6:33:04 PM
  • 156
    Great blog!! - 3/30/2011   3:37:48 PM
  • PIECEBYPIECE
    155
    I am somewhat the opposite. My mother does not think I should limit myself to only "healthy food" and does not support my weight loss. It is hard to have someone nagging the other way around too. - 3/30/2011   2:10:34 PM
  • 154
    I wish I could print this out and give it to my grandmother, but she wouldn't read it or think it applies to her if she did. I was raised by her and had bulimia for many years. She doesn't say anything to me much anymore, but has hounded my 19 year old son for years, even though I have tried talking to her, AND gotten into yelling fights with her over it. She is 89 and won't change anyway, it's learning to ignore her comments or change the subject. - 3/30/2011   12:46:37 PM
  • 153
    Thank you for articulating exactly what I have felt..I am copying this article and sending it to my daughter..I believe that people need to learn about their judgement calls no matter what their intent. My motto is think before you speak AND lets spread words of love! - 3/30/2011   10:13:33 AM
  • 152
    My experience of diet police is rather different but just as annoying. I was 50 pounds overweight when I joined Spark and have lost approximately 14 pounds since then. A member of my family regularly looks me up and down and says stuff like 'Oh dear . . . . you won't lose TOO much will you?' The first few times I asked what she meant but she had no reply. Guess I don't need to say that she could do with losing quite a few pounds herself. - 3/30/2011   9:16:43 AM
  • BFLOPOLSKA316
    151
    I had a psychiatrist who accused me of lying about losing inches because the scale didn't really change in the numbers. The guy said I was purposely buying my clothing too large so I may deceive my husband and others. Never mind that I had been lifting weights for several months. He told me I could not lose weight on my own, and that only surgery would help; all I had to do was let him write me into a local private hospital and I could get the lap-band in less than 72 hours. I freaked and left the office in tears. No one believed me until I went to my regular MD in an old pair of jeans and dropped them to the floor in the exam room so that he could see my smaller tuchas in bright purple undies! I could pull them right off without unbuttoning or unzipping; I had dropped three sizes! He promptly wrote me a referral to another psychiatrist. - 3/30/2011   8:37:38 AM
  • CHRISTY357
    150
    I used to let them make me feel bad. Now I look them straight in the eye and say, "I've got to keep my weight up." - 3/29/2011   9:49:46 PM
  • 149
    My Mom, who is otherwise my best friend, seems to have done a number on me growing up. She and my brother are both svelte with high metabolisms, while my Dad and I have spent our entire lives struggling with our weight. She's not MEAN about it, but now that I'm older I'm starting to understand the complex she seems to have given me. I started eating in secret before I even graduated 8th grade because, while my preternaturally skinny brother was allowed to gorge himself on Lucky Charms and cheese puffs and then order dessert without comment, I was hit with a constant barrage of, "Do you really need that?" "Are you hungry, or are you just bored?" "Just put down the fork." "Are you snacking AGAIN?" and "Didn't you just eat?"

    I developed such a sense of shame about eating that even now I'm red thinking about it. It got so bad that my kid brother would be demolishing a huge slice of chocolate [insert pastry here] after a meal out, and if I tried to nab a forkful, my mother would chastise me. "Oh, don't. You don't need that."

    I know it came from a good place, her trying to get me to be conscious about how I was eating and what I put in my body, but the only way I was able to lose weight at all was by telling her flat-out that I didn't want her help, or her questions, or her minding me, and that if I wanted her to know how it was going, I would tell her.

    Still wish I could undo the lasting damage from my childhood, though. - 3/29/2011   9:33:32 PM
  • 148
    Thanks, amazing article and very eloquent too:) - 3/29/2011   9:05:09 PM
  • 147
    Thank you for the article. These types of people always upset me! I have two in my family and... you're right! They have never had problems with weight and know EVERYTHING about losing weight! Anymore, I'm not sure if they do it to feel good about themselves or if they truly care about my weight. - 3/29/2011   8:26:39 PM
  • KITTCATT12
    146
    My husband is the worst! He's the ONLY one that polices me and he does it so effeciently that I often binge (when he's not around) because he's pissed me off so bad. Even when we go out he gets upset if I ordr anything but a salad! I've talked to him about it but he just does'nt get it. He thinks he's "helping" me. - 3/29/2011   8:09:41 PM
  • 145
    Amen! My husband is the diet police and I have experienced all of this. I still tend to eat more when he is not around when he can't see though I fight it.... - 3/29/2011   6:26:05 PM
  • WITCHCAT1
    144
    After many years of the diet police encouraging me to eat (Yes!) even as they questioned my wisdom, I was blessed with a fantastic son-in-law. He firmly stated that he didn't like hearing me put myself down and wanted me to STOP. That changed my approach. If anyone were to question me now, I'd be likely to say, "Why do you ask?" or "I'm sorry. I don't recall asking for your advice." But no one says anything now that I don't. - 3/29/2011   6:21:34 PM

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