Selective Hearing: Turn it On
By: Michelene Cleary,
SparkPeople Blogger
11/10/2011 10:00 AM
: 46 comments
: 9,306 Views
Back in my high school days I was a long distance competitive swimmer and participated on my school team, as well as the city team. During those four years of swimming I put in countless thousands of laps, hours upon hours of training, but never fully mastered one stroke.
On one occasion I remember my coach having the entire team get out of the pool so they could stand there and watch me swim the butterfly stroke. He wanted to teach them how not to do it. Talk about utter humiliation. Eventually I graduated and moved on, finishing as captain of the team and successful in some distance events that others wouldn’t dream of swimming. Always in the back of my mind though, was the fact that for some reason I couldn’t master the butterfly stroke.
Fast forward three years into college and I met a friend who also was a high school swimmer that specialized in the butterfly stroke. I was quick to tell him how horrible I was at it and that I would never be able to do that stroke correctly. He gave me the “pffft” noise and said “get in the pool, and I’ll show you how to do it.” Within 30 minutes he had me swimming a great butterfly stroke, up and down the pool. How did that happen?
I have kept this in mind for many years now, as an explicit example of how we can let someone else’s words and beliefs impact what we allow ourselves to achieve. I now use the “pffft” noise when someone says to me, “I’m never going to be able to lose this weight.” I tell them to "get on SparkPeople, add me as a friend and I’ll show you how to do it. I mean if I can lose all this weight, why can’t you?"
So now I encourage others to engage in selective hearing and tune out those around them that are unsupportive and negative about their chances for success. When they start telling you how you are never going to lose weight or reach your goals, just tell them to talk to the hand. You’ve got SparkPeople on your side and that is a winning combo. Not sure about that? Check out some of the success stories in the community tab.
Start believing in yourself, and your ability to win this challenge to get healthy. Join together with other like minded individuals who want to build you up, encourage you, teach you, inspire you, and together we can all cross the finish line reaching our goals. Don’t let the naysayers hold you back anymore. This is your time to fly free!
Visit the Community tab on SparkPeople to find SparkTeams and Message Boards to help you connect with other members who are waiting to encourage you.
Have you browsed through some of the success stories? Are you the naysayer in your own journey? What can you do to take some positive steps toward believing in your ability to accomplish the task today?
On one occasion I remember my coach having the entire team get out of the pool so they could stand there and watch me swim the butterfly stroke. He wanted to teach them how not to do it. Talk about utter humiliation. Eventually I graduated and moved on, finishing as captain of the team and successful in some distance events that others wouldn’t dream of swimming. Always in the back of my mind though, was the fact that for some reason I couldn’t master the butterfly stroke.
Fast forward three years into college and I met a friend who also was a high school swimmer that specialized in the butterfly stroke. I was quick to tell him how horrible I was at it and that I would never be able to do that stroke correctly. He gave me the “pffft” noise and said “get in the pool, and I’ll show you how to do it.” Within 30 minutes he had me swimming a great butterfly stroke, up and down the pool. How did that happen?
I have kept this in mind for many years now, as an explicit example of how we can let someone else’s words and beliefs impact what we allow ourselves to achieve. I now use the “pffft” noise when someone says to me, “I’m never going to be able to lose this weight.” I tell them to "get on SparkPeople, add me as a friend and I’ll show you how to do it. I mean if I can lose all this weight, why can’t you?"
So now I encourage others to engage in selective hearing and tune out those around them that are unsupportive and negative about their chances for success. When they start telling you how you are never going to lose weight or reach your goals, just tell them to talk to the hand. You’ve got SparkPeople on your side and that is a winning combo. Not sure about that? Check out some of the success stories in the community tab.
Start believing in yourself, and your ability to win this challenge to get healthy. Join together with other like minded individuals who want to build you up, encourage you, teach you, inspire you, and together we can all cross the finish line reaching our goals. Don’t let the naysayers hold you back anymore. This is your time to fly free!
Visit the Community tab on SparkPeople to find SparkTeams and Message Boards to help you connect with other members who are waiting to encourage you.
Have you browsed through some of the success stories? Are you the naysayer in your own journey? What can you do to take some positive steps toward believing in your ability to accomplish the task today?
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Comments
My very big-hearted bestie taught me a lesson on selective hearing.
If someone throws a negative comment about her appearance or her being too much or too large in the world she says to herself (but sometimes to the person) : "That Is So Your Stuff!"
I do it now too and it is so helpful! - 11/13/2011 6:19:02 PM
I have been too often halted in my life's journey by the critics, especially when the critics are those whom one expects to be supportive. That's a tough obstacle to overcome. Cheering oneself on can sometimes be hard.
Thanks for this blog. - 11/13/2011 2:05:53 PM
Thank you for sharing! - 11/12/2011 6:25:12 PM
- 11/12/2011 2:55:57 AM
- 11/11/2011 9:01:13 AM
It's funny, I think the universe must really want me to realise this because I got the same message yesterday. I met a lovely lady - she is retired but more positive, vibrant and engaged with life than most of my younger friends. She told me the exact same thing - told me to stop telling myself a certain story that there's something I can't do. She said "rewrite" the story in my head to tell myself I CAN do it!
So between this blog and the wonderful lady, this message has really hit home for me! - 11/11/2011 4:10:36 AM
really looks like. - 11/10/2011 5:05:40 PM
I have had 3 moments in my life where I let the words of others have an effect on my weight loss. Once my sister said ... after I just told her I finally got to the 30 pound weight loss ... "You still have a long way to go." She called that support. After losing another 5 pounds which seemed to take weeks someone said to me "The pounds will start to come off slower soon." and the last comment that rings in my head is: "The way you eat you'll be fat someday."
Those comments went straight to my soul because I let them. I would go on fasts as a teenager so that someday I wouldn't be fat. I gave up on my diet after my sister told me I had a long ways to go. I only had 30 more pounds to go! I wish that's all I had to lose now.
I moved away from home because of the job. I lost 80 pounds by eating 3 meals and working out at the gym. It fell off so fast and easy when something in my life came along and hit me in the gut I gained the 80 pounds back and then some.
Since joining this site I can see that I let these sort of comments kill my progress. I keep my head in a good place and watch out for those toxic comments.... which are still coming. I have to think to myself that these people honestly believe they are supporting my weight loss. I do not let those comments infect my head any longer. My goal is to make life long changes in my mind, gut and body.
I am winning! - 11/10/2011 1:03:38 PM
Awesome blog! - 11/10/2011 12:03:19 PM
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