From Depression to Progression: Guidance from the Mystery Tramp & Napoleon in Rags
By: Dean Anderson,
SparkPeople Blogger
7/17/2009 6:53 PM
: 112 comments
: 14,017 Views
When you got nothing,
you got nothing to lose.
You’re invisible now, you
got no secrets to conceal.
How does it feel
To be on your own
With no direction home
Like a complete unknown
Like a rolling stone?
Bob Dylan
Like a Rolling Stone
If you’re wondering what a couple of characters in a Bob Dylan song (Like a Rolling Stone) have to do with coping with depression (the subject of this series of blogs), so am I. But it made a lot of sense to me last night when I was listening to the song (a nightly ritual), so I thought I’d see if it still makes sense when I try to write about it.
I think that most people who are or who have been depressed will see the connection between depression and what Dylan is talking about in the lyrics from what may be his best song (and, imo, the best song of its generation and genre). The feelings of isolation, being different, having no purpose or direction, not being seen or known as you “really” are and not even really knowing yourself, finding no real pleasure in your life or your activities, and just rolling through life detached from your customary landscape—all of these are basic symptoms of depression. (Back in the pre-Prozac days when Dylan wrote the song, this package of “symptoms” would probably have been called “alienation” rather than “depression,” but that’s another story).
But Dylan also seems to suggest they are quite a bit more than mere symptoms of an illness. In Like a Rolling Stone, all of this sounds more like a necessary rite of passage than an illness or a personal problem. In order to move beyond the unconscious, unsatisfying life of “fitting in” with the crowd and its dubious and often oppressive collective values, into a fuller, more individualized and self-chosen life, we have to become depressed for a little while, at least. We have to recognize that life as we have known it so far really isn’t the whole story—and that more is required of us, and more is available to us if we make the effort. We have to recognize and experience this on a feeling level, not just a philosophical one.
The first stage in this process is becoming dissatisfied on a deep level with what we’ve already got, what we’ve already done, and who we already are—i.e., getting depressed. Unfortunately, this doesn’t seem to lead directly to sudden enlightenment and a clear sense of what’s really important and what we ought to do. Instead, the next step is about recognizing that we have to “compromise with the mystery tramp,” learning essentially how to live with one foot in two worlds—the world of what we can no longer be satisfied with, and the undefined world of our own creative vision. But that second world has not yet been created, because we've been too depressed to try. Which means we have to commit to it without knowing what we’ll get out of the deal in advance. Not all things are possible for us. It’s not like we can literally do anything and everything we want, once we decide what that is. We have our own limitations, we have to consider the needs of those attached to us, and we live in a finite and unpredictable world where things don’t always go as planned, no matter who we are. In short, every choice means leaving something else behind. And we can’t be sure that the choices we make in terms of where to focus our energy and effort are the “right” ones.
In Dylan’s terms, we have to “stare into the vacuum of [the mystery tramp’s] eyes and ask him do you want to make a deal.” And what the mystery tramp has to offer is the possibility of liberation from our own shame:
When you got nothing, you got nothing to lose
You’re invisible now, you got no secrets to conceal.
Without our images, schemes, and objects to protect, and our secrets to conceal, we’re finally free to be ourselves, and that is the foundation on which all development or progression from here on out depends. But the price we pay for this liberation is becoming even more invisible to those who aren’t taking this journey themselves.
One way or another, it seems, we’re stuck with some kind of being invisible. We can be invisible to ourselves by remaining stuck in the unproductive, uncreative suffering of depression where all anyone (including us) sees is our symptoms. Or we can be invisible to others by undertaking a private, interior journey where we try to turn our suffering and our symptoms into clues about what kind of changes we need to make in our personal lives. This latter kind of invisibility may be less painful and more rewarding, but it is still less than what we probably need, and is its own kind of suffering.
But maybe there’s another option. What if we take seriously the option of joining forces with “napoleon in rags” and add our own voices to the language he uses? It may not be popular in our culture of medicalized human problems and quick, consumption-based fixes for everything that bothers us. What if we try to become artists at expressing our own experience of depression? Instead of describing our symptoms and talking about all the medications and therapies we’ve tried, what if we talk instead about our desires and needs, fears and insecurities, hopes and dreams--and ask why they aren’t portrayed every place we look, like the other images our culture has seized on to define the world of human aspirations. All we really need to do is learn how to express what it feels like to be a rolling stone.
OK, rant over. Now, back to our regular programming.
Some of you may be wondering what developed after my last blog, about going in for ECT therapy. Well, that’s an interesting story all by itself.
I was feeling pretty proud of myself last week, after cleverly deducing that the message the Universe has been trying to send me has something to do with not isolating myself so much, and developing more “real-world” relationships and activities. And I was pretty sure I was taking the appropriate steps to remedy this situation by using ECT to help me out of my depression as quickly as possible, so I could bravely tackle the world of face-to-face relationships, on my own, undepressed terms.
A less biased observer might have noticed that there’s a pretty basic misfit between the goal (getting more involved socially) and the method (electroconvulsive therapy) in this plan of mine. And that my resolve not to “medicalize” my symptoms evaporated pretty quickly, and turned into a desire to get rid of them by the quickest means possible, instead of trying to learn something from them.
I suspect that’s why whoever’s in charge of delivering messages from the Universe decided that I need something a little more forceful and direct than the normal signaling methods. And that’s exactly what I got…
Last Tuesday night, I was in the behavior health unit of a local hospital, getting ready for an early bedtime so I that I’d be ready for my first ECT session the next morning. I was heading to the bathroom when, the next thing I knew, I found myself waking up in bed, in the regular medical section of the hospital, with a cast on my lower leg. Apparently, I had passed out while walking to the bathroom (thanks to several medications that tend to induce positional hypotension), fallen, and broken my ankle in a couple of places. It was a day and half later when I woke up, and I had missed my ETC session. When I asked about my ECT, and when I’d be going back to the behavioral health unit, I was told there were no beds available there, and that I had been taken off the ECT schedule, since no one knew how soon I’d be ready to do it.
Now, I can be pretty dense sometimes, but even I got this message. No ECT, at least for now. Instead, I will try to spend the next three months of enforced physical idleness (no biking or hiking—yikes!) seeing what other approaches to remaining (or getting?) sane I can come up with. You’ll be the first to know what I come up with, or don’t.
What do you think? How do you talk about depression (your own or others)--as symptoms and remedies, or as a clue to something bigger? Are you willing to start thinking of your depression as the beginnings of a new way of life, instead of as psychological symptoms--or does this make no sense at all to you?
you got nothing to lose.
You’re invisible now, you
got no secrets to conceal.
How does it feel
To be on your own
With no direction home
Like a complete unknown
Like a rolling stone?
Bob Dylan
Like a Rolling Stone
If you’re wondering what a couple of characters in a Bob Dylan song (Like a Rolling Stone) have to do with coping with depression (the subject of this series of blogs), so am I. But it made a lot of sense to me last night when I was listening to the song (a nightly ritual), so I thought I’d see if it still makes sense when I try to write about it.
I think that most people who are or who have been depressed will see the connection between depression and what Dylan is talking about in the lyrics from what may be his best song (and, imo, the best song of its generation and genre). The feelings of isolation, being different, having no purpose or direction, not being seen or known as you “really” are and not even really knowing yourself, finding no real pleasure in your life or your activities, and just rolling through life detached from your customary landscape—all of these are basic symptoms of depression. (Back in the pre-Prozac days when Dylan wrote the song, this package of “symptoms” would probably have been called “alienation” rather than “depression,” but that’s another story).
But Dylan also seems to suggest they are quite a bit more than mere symptoms of an illness. In Like a Rolling Stone, all of this sounds more like a necessary rite of passage than an illness or a personal problem. In order to move beyond the unconscious, unsatisfying life of “fitting in” with the crowd and its dubious and often oppressive collective values, into a fuller, more individualized and self-chosen life, we have to become depressed for a little while, at least. We have to recognize that life as we have known it so far really isn’t the whole story—and that more is required of us, and more is available to us if we make the effort. We have to recognize and experience this on a feeling level, not just a philosophical one.
The first stage in this process is becoming dissatisfied on a deep level with what we’ve already got, what we’ve already done, and who we already are—i.e., getting depressed. Unfortunately, this doesn’t seem to lead directly to sudden enlightenment and a clear sense of what’s really important and what we ought to do. Instead, the next step is about recognizing that we have to “compromise with the mystery tramp,” learning essentially how to live with one foot in two worlds—the world of what we can no longer be satisfied with, and the undefined world of our own creative vision. But that second world has not yet been created, because we've been too depressed to try. Which means we have to commit to it without knowing what we’ll get out of the deal in advance. Not all things are possible for us. It’s not like we can literally do anything and everything we want, once we decide what that is. We have our own limitations, we have to consider the needs of those attached to us, and we live in a finite and unpredictable world where things don’t always go as planned, no matter who we are. In short, every choice means leaving something else behind. And we can’t be sure that the choices we make in terms of where to focus our energy and effort are the “right” ones.
In Dylan’s terms, we have to “stare into the vacuum of [the mystery tramp’s] eyes and ask him do you want to make a deal.” And what the mystery tramp has to offer is the possibility of liberation from our own shame:
When you got nothing, you got nothing to lose
You’re invisible now, you got no secrets to conceal.
Without our images, schemes, and objects to protect, and our secrets to conceal, we’re finally free to be ourselves, and that is the foundation on which all development or progression from here on out depends. But the price we pay for this liberation is becoming even more invisible to those who aren’t taking this journey themselves.
One way or another, it seems, we’re stuck with some kind of being invisible. We can be invisible to ourselves by remaining stuck in the unproductive, uncreative suffering of depression where all anyone (including us) sees is our symptoms. Or we can be invisible to others by undertaking a private, interior journey where we try to turn our suffering and our symptoms into clues about what kind of changes we need to make in our personal lives. This latter kind of invisibility may be less painful and more rewarding, but it is still less than what we probably need, and is its own kind of suffering.
But maybe there’s another option. What if we take seriously the option of joining forces with “napoleon in rags” and add our own voices to the language he uses? It may not be popular in our culture of medicalized human problems and quick, consumption-based fixes for everything that bothers us. What if we try to become artists at expressing our own experience of depression? Instead of describing our symptoms and talking about all the medications and therapies we’ve tried, what if we talk instead about our desires and needs, fears and insecurities, hopes and dreams--and ask why they aren’t portrayed every place we look, like the other images our culture has seized on to define the world of human aspirations. All we really need to do is learn how to express what it feels like to be a rolling stone.
OK, rant over. Now, back to our regular programming.
Some of you may be wondering what developed after my last blog, about going in for ECT therapy. Well, that’s an interesting story all by itself.
I was feeling pretty proud of myself last week, after cleverly deducing that the message the Universe has been trying to send me has something to do with not isolating myself so much, and developing more “real-world” relationships and activities. And I was pretty sure I was taking the appropriate steps to remedy this situation by using ECT to help me out of my depression as quickly as possible, so I could bravely tackle the world of face-to-face relationships, on my own, undepressed terms.
A less biased observer might have noticed that there’s a pretty basic misfit between the goal (getting more involved socially) and the method (electroconvulsive therapy) in this plan of mine. And that my resolve not to “medicalize” my symptoms evaporated pretty quickly, and turned into a desire to get rid of them by the quickest means possible, instead of trying to learn something from them.
I suspect that’s why whoever’s in charge of delivering messages from the Universe decided that I need something a little more forceful and direct than the normal signaling methods. And that’s exactly what I got…
Last Tuesday night, I was in the behavior health unit of a local hospital, getting ready for an early bedtime so I that I’d be ready for my first ECT session the next morning. I was heading to the bathroom when, the next thing I knew, I found myself waking up in bed, in the regular medical section of the hospital, with a cast on my lower leg. Apparently, I had passed out while walking to the bathroom (thanks to several medications that tend to induce positional hypotension), fallen, and broken my ankle in a couple of places. It was a day and half later when I woke up, and I had missed my ETC session. When I asked about my ECT, and when I’d be going back to the behavioral health unit, I was told there were no beds available there, and that I had been taken off the ECT schedule, since no one knew how soon I’d be ready to do it.
Now, I can be pretty dense sometimes, but even I got this message. No ECT, at least for now. Instead, I will try to spend the next three months of enforced physical idleness (no biking or hiking—yikes!) seeing what other approaches to remaining (or getting?) sane I can come up with. You’ll be the first to know what I come up with, or don’t.
What do you think? How do you talk about depression (your own or others)--as symptoms and remedies, or as a clue to something bigger? Are you willing to start thinking of your depression as the beginnings of a new way of life, instead of as psychological symptoms--or does this make no sense at all to you?
 You will earn 5 SparkPoints |
NEXT ENTRY > Megan Fox Doesn't Work Out, Eats Once a Day
.jpg)
Comments
Perhaps depression (other than severe, life-threatening depression) is something we have to work through instead of rushing to medicate to make it go away. - 10/8/2010 9:16:22 AM
The older I get, the more I see messages from beyond in my life. You certainly got a definite one with the broken ankle.
I love reading your blogs. Keep it up. Hope you aren't off your feet too long; or, if your are, that you find another way to grow while you're waiting. - 8/29/2009 7:44:19 AM
I hate to admit it, but I'm kind of glad that you didn't end up having ECT. I think you have a fabulous mind, and I really want you to be careful with that brain of yours. My reasons are totally selfish, of course, so I'd never presume to tell you what to do. I am however willing to share that I am relieved. I'm really sorry about the ankle, but it looks like that might turn out pretty well for me too. I'm really looking forward to your articles.
Seriously Dean, I really appreciate you. I remember you in my prayers. I'm incredibly grateful for the way you are allowing us to walk with you through dark and dangerous inner territory. How else will any of us learn to map that landscape unless someone takes us along? You are doing a great service. - 8/16/2009 3:06:18 PM
It does help me to talk about things. However, I need to make sure of who I am talking to. I have to feel safe. - 7/28/2009 5:48:11 PM
I must state that I am saddened by so many comments that are connecting your injury as a reason NOT to participate in the ECT. In no way do I see any connection between the two events.
I am sure that you and your medical-staff completely explored many options and/or variety of treatments which included the ECT. One never enters any treatment easily. I experience clinical depression and like a 'transplant' patient, I am willing to be as healthy as possible. I would consider ECT if my depression became severe. Severe clinical depression is a medical condtion NOT an issue of just thinking positive thoughts.
I wish to state that I have two very very close family members who participated in ECT. As with any illness there are pros and cons... yet ECT was a life-saving event for our family.
Surgeon and author Sherwin Nuland discusses the development of electroshock therapy as a cure for severe, life-threatening depression -- including his own. It’s a moving and heartfelt talk about relief, redemption and second chances. The link is:
http://www.ted.com/talks/lang/eng/s
herwin_nuland_on_electroshock_thera
py.html
- 7/22/2009 1:49:20 PM
The universe sent the msg and wants you to start w/ real world relationships w/ the team in physical therapy!
Good luck! - 7/21/2009 3:34:42 PM
You know the old show-biz wish for good luck, "Break a leg!"? Maybe the universe was delivering that message to you, too, though perhaps in wishing you a detour from ECT via an alternate path of your own making. And no one could forge that path like you do! All the best, Susan - 7/21/2009 1:02:52 PM
Pay attention, pay attention, pay attention.
Ahh, the music of the spheres. - 7/21/2009 11:49:59 AM
I walked away from this class with the acute knowledge that my professor (who was quite an interesting and intelligent lady) feels that ECT should only be done as a LAST RESORT ONLY! That was VERY very clear to the entire class....so I was pretty stunned when I heard that you were going to undergo this treatment. You're a smart guy who does his homework ...this we know...so I'm figuring that you have thourghly researched this treatment. Have you?
You mentioned that you were attempting this because you wanted out of this pain "as quickly as possible". Are you really at that point when you are willing to undergo brain SEIZURES for relief? If you are at that point....when you have tried everything else and absolutely nothing else will work....and you can't take it anymore....well...I can certainly understand being desperate for relief and reaching out to unconventional therapies. The textbook goes on to say that "Today as few as 50,000 (people) per year are believed to receive it (Cauchon, 1999). Two of the reasons for this decline are the memory loss caused by ECT and the frightening nature of the procedure.
Please understand, I'm not saying you shouldnt undergo the procedure, I just want to make sure that everyone who reads this understands that ECT causes brain seizures and memory loss, and that sometimes the memory loss is permenent.
In essence, we are attempting to "reset" the brains chemicals by causing seizures. Serious stuff.
Karen - 7/21/2009 8:35:55 AM
http://www.songramp.com/mod/mps/vie
wtrack.php?trackid=42800
Oddly enough, looking back at my work, I realize that some of the best songs I've written were born out of depression or anger. When I'm angry and frustrated, the words just come rushing into my brain. I wish this wasn't so. Once I wrote a love song. It took everything I had. Unfortunately, the person who inspired me to write it turned out to be unworthy of my affection. Though I'd really like to, I can't seem to write another one.
Since coming to spark people, I have the desire to write inspirational lyrics to help people help themselves. It isn't easy. Perhaps when I'm done with the children's songs I'm working on for my day job, I'll find my positive muse.
I think that blogging is an art form. Your blogs are like lyrics. They evoke a multitude of thoughts and images, reaching out to touch others who hunger for nourishment; tools that can help others help themselves.
Karma is a funny thing. Isn't it ironic?
Grace supersedes Karma.
- 7/20/2009 10:15:37 PM
Stay strong, Coach Dean! - 7/20/2009 7:30:08 PM
I have personally had great success with simple clary sage aromatherapy baths, and much intense, personal work, writing and purging. I send and offer you every powerful thought and prayer I can give, and look forward to your writing terrifically, and fearlessly, in the future. - 7/20/2009 7:08:31 PM
About Bob Dylan and Rolling Stone. I too have a close attachment to this (and other songs by him). I was going from child to adult and felt the connection with the lose of my old self and the becoming of the new. But I never connected depression with it. In fact people have been telling me I am depressed all my life. And it always comes as a surprise to me for them to say that. I have come to the conclusion that when a professional wants to discuss "my depression" and treatment of it I say "anyone living the experiences that I have of course would be depressed. But I can live with it, I have other things to do besides changing who I am since I rather like myself just as I am."
You have my support whatever you chose to do. Thanks for sharing. - 7/20/2009 5:58:41 PM
I really like your attitude about finding something positive in depression.
Good for you!
I can only start today from where I am. Thanks for reminding me! - 7/20/2009 3:09:48 PM
Napoleon once planned a whole campaign between acts while a the theater. He worked while the rest of the world slept, and conquered all Europe, because he utilized the time that the rest of the world was letting go to waste. Even if you didn't change your schedule (well, now it's kinda been changed for you), but changed only the way you handled wasted moments, you could start realizing your dream. It would be slow, but you'd be on your way. An old Chinese proverb says: "Patience is power; with time and patience the mulberry leaf becomes silk." Let every moment be enriched and utilized! Use this time to enrich your brain or study towards your dream. Trust God to make a way where there seems to be no way! See waiting as an opportunity instead of an exasperation. As a Writer, carry your note pad wherever you go. Want to learn a foriegn language, write a book, write a play, do some research? Do it! Time passed can never be retrieved; so make it count. You can do it if you will reprogram your attitude and approach to things. Look at delays as productive interludes given to you in this race of life. Don't curse them--welcome them. Life will have its delays, waits and slow hours; (we all experience them) expect them and plan for them. Don't join the crowd of bored people sighing, griping, and complaining. Write a musical while they curse.
Time is one of God's greatest gifts to mankind. We all have the same amount, but we all spend it differently. Time can never be recalled. Once it ticks away, it's gone forever. The only thing we have to show for it is the investment we made with it. Coach Dean, I KNOW you've got a lot to invest in this time you were now given. Don't make great plans to do great things until you reach a certain age, make now the time to do it! Start today! Carlyle said it well: "Our grand business is not to see what lies dimly in the distance, but to do what lies clearly at hand." Time does not blow horns nor make announcements. It is quiet, unassuming, and faithful. It forever marches forward on padded footsteps into the ageless future. All that was yesterday is no more and cannot be retrieved. Benjamin Franklin made this statement, "Dost thou love life?--Then do not squander time, for that is the stuff life is made of."
May God Richly Bless You with His Grace & Peace!
- 7/20/2009 12:55:49 PM
As I was reading this portion of your blog:
"We have to recognize that life as we have known it so far really isn’t the whole story—and that more is required of us, and more is available to us if we make the effort. We have to recognize and experience this on a feeling level, not just a philosophical one."
I immediately thought of that state of being I entered years ago, after a near-death experience, wherein I was convinced that my future would only hold happy days and that I was alive to serve some monumentally important purpose in the world. IDK whether I expected to single-handedly bring about world peace and put an end to world hunger, or if I thought that somehow my newly-damaged brain would somehow understand sciences and mathmatics that were formerly beyond my grasp, or what, but I was pretty damned certain that God saved my life because I had not fulfilled my destiny.
I may have had some delusions of grandeur going on there, y'think?
I do think that you're onto something with the idea of separating the medical issues from the emotional ones. The mind is not the brain and the brain is not the mind. There may be funky stuff going on with your brain chemistry that biologically impact your emotions, and that certainly can be considered a medical issue. But fixing that won't resolve the deep, soul-searching questions you have for yourself. To get to that nitty gritty requires something other than chemically-induced balance.
I also found your musings about invisibility to be quite interesting. Some years ago, I had a cousin, whom I hadn't seen for years, tell me that the thing he most remembers about me as a child was that I was so good at making myself invisible to the rest of the world. How odd! From my perspective, as a child I just wanted somebody to notice me and to acknowledge that I might have something of value to offer the world. Maybe I took the "children should be seen and not heard" thing a little too far??
I know your broken ankle isn't funny, but I had to laugh at the circumstances under which it occurred. You evidently had not been listening closely enough to yourself (or to the Higher Power?) with regard to the best course of treatment. The Universe found a way to steer you a different direction, at least for the time being.
Sometimes we have to get a lot of "slow down, there, partner" signals before we get the message. Could you be given any clearer opportunity to take some time for reflection and introspection?
Whether you think so or not, I think you are making good progress. Sometimes you have to be patient and allow things to percolate for a while. Maybe what you need isn't a quick fix. - 7/20/2009 12:45:31 PM
I am doing one day at a time, now off of my "rose-colored glasses" medication and after five weeks I have still not seen the darkness yet. I know that I need to continue to work on my personal "ladder" so I can bridge over the hole rather than fall in. I miss my med as I believe I was a nicer person when on it and I never got angry in traffic, but everything is a trade-off.
But with depression, it is chemical as well as emotional...we are complex little creatures and not every little chemical release and hormone seems to work after we ease past a certain age. We are social creatures, comfortable in routine and frightened of change, and so many things can cause stress, fear and trigger than dark hole. So your desire for a good listening friend to share your feelings with will be one of the best healing techniques you could ever find. That makes this life journey so much easier---sharing the load!
I enjoy Dylan, but I would ask you to find another nightly ritual music. I did the same thing when I was depressed, finding music that I thought answered questions or made me think I was not alone in my darkness...but I don't believe that it was helpful now. It was more helpful to listen to classical and not to always think about me...but to see the universe in everything...to see the beauty in the spirit of the music. It was more gentle to my mind and it created a safe, peaceful spot without self analysis and loneliness.
May you gracefully surrender to the incredible journey you are on (with speed bumps, fences and stones that will trip you) and find yourself, whole and happy, in who you are---which by the way is not invisible and not directionless.
Be at peace and heal quickly! - 7/20/2009 10:16:04 AM
Oh this concept is all-too-familiar to me (i.e., you're making complete sense)! I've struggled with bouts of depression at various times, too, and can relate to the frustration of 'knowing this is temporary and will pass, but don't know how to make it pass without disrupting my whole life'... I've sort of resigned myself to the fact that depression is just part of life - it's part of the cycle of renewal necessary to keep me moving on my life-journey because nothing new can begin until something else ends... And sometimes I can be dense, too. For instance, I had to take a really bad job and be constantly mistreated because I was too stubborn to see that I needed to follow a different career path. I'm not saying I deserved the treatment, but only that without the pain of the experience driving me to find something else, I wouldn't have been motivated at that time to make necessary changes (mostly b/c I was too afraid of the unknown).
So, I think you're right on target with today's blog post. Keep 'em coming as you work through this round! It will pass for you, too, when you're ready. :) - 7/20/2009 9:55:45 AM
Joking aside - I think we all find our own way to express our angst, whether as a generation (as did Dylan, or van Gogh, or so many others) or as individuals. For some of us it's words, as in your blog. For some of us, it's another form - I kept a visual journal, a journal of drawings/paintings reflecting my changing moods and thoughts. Art is therapy for me. I think art - in all its forms, written, visual, musical, etc. - is basically the creator/artist expressing and working through emotions, thoughts, feelings.
And, well, I'll admit that my personal anthem of the 60s was the Byrd's "Turn Turn Turn." For what that's worth. A time to every purpose under Heaven. (Huh. Not in a religious sense, not for me to proselytize - as in everything in human existence. Everything in the world. Universe. There's still a purpose. Which I think is part of what you've been talking about.)
- 7/19/2009 8:19:44 PM
Good luck on healing and don't let it get you down. - 7/19/2009 5:05:22 PM
Along with the other members of the 12-step program I received professional help that included anti-depressants and intense therapy. The first to heal of course was my body because I was abstaining from alcohol (and drugs) and eating and drinking good stuff. For the first time in years I began to experience hope, hope that the mental anguish and confusion I dealt with daily could be gone. My spiritual self was sparked by this hope which made my emotions soar. By diligently following the 12 steps and therapy I have come to believe that just for today my mind is healthy enough to handle whatever may come my way, as long as I'm spiritually fit. Notice I said spiritually fit not religiously fit.
Did you know there were this many Spiritual Principles of the 12 Steps of Recovery?
Spiritual Principles of the 12 Steps:
1. Honesty
2. Acceptance
3. Surrender
4. Hope
5. Commitment
6. Faith
7. Courage
8. Willingness
9. Humility
10. Unconditional love
11. Perseverance
12. Open-mindedness
13. God-Centeredness
14. Awareness
15. Vigilance
16. Self-discipline
17. Sharing and caring
18. Patience
19. Forgiveness
20. Optimism
21. Selflessness
22. Compassion
23. Consideration
24. Kindness
25. Positive thinking
26. Responsibility
27. Tolerance
28. Trust
29. Unity
30. Gratitude
31. Service
These spiritual principles are achieved as a result of my doing the steps (today). I cannot wish to have them or acquire them by copying the behavior of others who have them.
I share all of this with you and anybody else who believes they are alone in the struggle with depression. Thank goodness what I had to deal with 30 years ago is not longer the case. There are 12-step programs for every malady now, even depression.
http://www.depressedanon.com/steps.
html
- 7/19/2009 1:14:30 PM
The above sentences from your article really HIT me! This is the way the universe is for most humans. Our reward is to do our best with what we have at the time, take a baby step and then hopefully improve as the days go by. Maybe, most of us just need to be more forgiving of ourselves. Keep trying and God bless your efforts! - 7/19/2009 12:29:19 PM
Please Log In To Leave A Comment: Log in now ›