Confession: This is How Much I Weigh

By , SparkPeople Blogger
What I’m about to share is something that many women (and men) feel ashamed, embarrassed and downright scared of exposing to others. I’m about to tell everyone exactly how much I weigh.

I haven’t weighed myself in years, but I always have some idea of what the number is. As a kid and teen, I was a hardcore athlete, training year-round for four different sports and practicing for hours a day. I started lifting weights at age 14, and have never feared muscle—I’ve always wanted to be strong. I’m taller than average (at 5’8”) and I’ve always weighed more than my friends, but even then I never saw myself as fat and never “dieted” even though all my teenage friends (who were already skinny) did. To me, muscle made me a better athlete and food gave me the fuel I needed, so I wasn’t going to skimp on either.

I recently explained how I don’t weigh myself, and that’s true. As a fitness professional, I know that weight is simply a number on the scale. It doesn’t tell you how fit you are, how much muscle you have, how much fat you have, or even if you’re truly overweight (or not). Yet we give so much credence to the scale, allowing it to influence how we feel about our bodies, how high our self-esteem will be that day, and whether we need to change our bodies. I’m not immune to that myself. Part of the reason I don’t weigh myself is because, even though my weight is healthy for my height, even though I’m fit and strong, and even though I feel somewhat confident about how my body looks, I feel bad about myself as soon as I see the number on the scale. So, I just avoid it! I pay attention to how I look and how my clothes fit, and if those things change for the worse, then I know I should make changes. This is what works for me and helps me to focus on what matters (and away from what doesn’t).

So how much do I weigh? Between 150 and 155 pounds (152 according to my weigh-in last week).

What do I think about it? Well, I’ve always weighed a lot—in high school, I was a svelte 148-pound athlete, when my teammates weighed about 120 pounds. I like to think I weigh more than expected because I’ve always lifted weights. Or maybe it’s because I’m taller. Or really, who knows. When I do (rarely) weigh myself, I instantly feel bad and wish I weighed less (hence the reason for the rare weigh-ins). But why? I don’t think I need to lose weight until I actually weigh myself. Unrealistic or not, I think every woman has “that number” in her head, for how much she’d like to weigh to really be happy. But I choose to ignore my head (after all, our minds can make us crazy sometimes!) and focus on what I do know to be true: That I won’t let society’s standards of beauty tell me that I should change my body, feel inadequate or look like someone I’m not.

I think it’s common for people to think they should be near the bottom of the healthy weight range for their height—I feel that way sometimes, too. But keep in mind that there’s no reason that you shouldn’t be at the top of your range, like I am. Just because there’s a range does not mean that you should be at the bottom of it. Many people try to diet or exercise their way to the bottom, even if it’s unhealthy or unrealistic in some cases.

I’m not exactly ashamed of my weight, but I think we can agree that people judge others for things like this, and the last thing I’d want is to be judged as less informed or less knowledgeable about exercise, fitness or weight control—the fields in which I work. I didn’t make this post to get any kind of reassurance or compliments from others. Rather, I decided to make this post because I want women to stop being ashamed of how much they weigh. I think we should all stop feeling inadequate, or like we need to be a certain size or weight to be happy, liked, attractive or good enough. And we should stop giving the scale more power than it really has—after all, weight is a number like age. It is what it is, but only means so much.

What do you think? Do you feel confident enough to tell others how much you weigh, how you honestly feel about your weight, and what you wish the scale would say? Does the scale make you feel bad about yourself?

Click here to to redeem your SparkPoints
  You will earn 5 SparkPoints


DIVAGLOW 1/21/2021
Thanks for sharing this Report
CECELW 12/8/2020
I've been there myself....I knew what I wanted to weight, but I was waaay over weight. Now, I'm at my goal and i've been taking better care of myself. It's helps that I am now an old lady! Report
PATRICIAAK 11/12/2020
:) Report
PATRICIAAK 6/26/2020
:) Report
Thank you for this. Report
Thank you. Report
Thank you for sharing this one. Report
Agree on what you said. My daughter was called fat by a doctor but she was all muscles and the doctor that said that was overweight and I told my daughter that she was not fat because she was all muscles and that weights more than fat. Report
The most fit person I've ever known was going for her Masters in a Phys Ed related major. She was 5' 2" tall and weighed 135. I was astounded, because at the time I had 5 inches and 25 pounds on her and I was really overweight! But she was lean and muscular and a petite titan. That was a good life lesson on why the scale is ONLY ONE WAY of measuring and there are other ones that tell the whole story of your health and fitness level. Report
I dread getting on the scale - - but I want to understand it is simply a tool. It is not a measurement of my self worth, confidence or happiness. It is a tool on my road to health. Report
I think the obesity crisis and equally insidious epidemic of being "nonjudgmental" and "body-positive NO MATTER WHAT" have skewed people's perception of what normal and healthy look like. I come from a family of doctors, so the importance of maintaining a healthy weight has been drummed into my head since childhood. For women, a good rule of thumb to find her "ideal" weight -- one backed by most medical professionals -- is 100 lbs. at 5', and 5 lbs. for every inch above that; a realistic healthy weight range is + or - 10 lbs. of this ideal at each height. Although build and body composition are important factors, you're really NOT at a healthy weight if you're too far outside that range. People need to stop vilifying the scale. Although not the ONLY measure out there, it is one very important tool to help ensure you are staying on track. Report
The only person who has known my weight (besides me, occasionally) is the nurse who checks me in at the doctor's office. I am thinking about your blog. That's a good thing, thanks! Report
I weigh 135 and I'm 5'4" tall. It's also closer to the top of my range for my height. The happy part... I've never in my life felt better about my body, 'cause I came down 52 lbs. to get here, and I've maintained (within a slight margin of error) for 5 years!!! Report
I have a very slight build, so I was always the opposite, getting nagged for not being nearer the middle of the range. But I tended to eat more (just more healthily) than my non athletic friends. I needed it, as I also did sport competitively.

Nowadays, I ignore the number. If I can go for a good run and enjoy every minute, keep lifting weights and getting stronger, and I feel fit, healthy and good in myself, then the number is irrelevant. I think that's a good place for us all to be! Report
I'm not putting any stock in the "BMI" or "ideal weight" range things, because I remember being at the weight I was most comfortable. That is the weight I felt best about my body, because I could do everything I wanted. Not that my current weight prevents me from doing anything; far from it. I just have my "happy number" to give me a goal that I know is attainable, because I've attained it in the past. Now I just have to work my @$$ off and get back to it. Coincidentally, my "happy number" is toward the top of the "ideal weight" scale for my height (5'2") because I know my frame is larger and I tend to build muscle easily. I may not ever have six-pack abs, so that isn't the overall goal. I want to be at the weight I picked for goal because I'm the most happy and confident in my skin when I'm at that "happy weight" number. The scale keeps me accountable for my choices, so I'll keep utilizing it as a tool (not as a be-all, end-all). Report
I'm aiming for the top of my range. I look terrible even at the mid-level. Not sure why. I'm very petite but I have a larger frame and have always been large chested...even when looking too thin at the mid-level. I also have always had muscular legs. I love dancing, cycling, even walking so it's no shock. Report
I weigh myself and don't care really. It's a number I measure to make sure im within a range that is right for me. I really want to be fit and active and healthy. Report
I don't like seeing the numbers on the scale go up when I get weighed at the drs office, but what is more frustrating for me is when my clothes are tight. But the feeling I have when my clothes fit better is more encouraging than the number on the scale. Report
At the DMV renewing my license years ago, the clerk looked at me when I told her I weighed 170lbs (at that time, before the biggest gain, then down to where I am now) and she said "No you don't" and put 145lbs on my driver's license. LOL!

I have always been heavy for my size and am still "overweight" by BMI, but at a healthy bodyfat of 23% and wear size 6 pants at 143lbs(ish) 5'3"tall.

I do weigh every morning because it keeps me in check. The scale number is only information, not a judgement....I like to look at my bank balance too. Report
Yes, the scale does make me feel bad about myself, often because it's negative feedback for what I've eaten in the last 24 hours, and also a reflection of how much sleep I got. Since those two conditions are transitory, it allows me the excuse that it'll bounce right back down again.

I'm very tempted to go without weighing for a period of time just to see what happens. I pretty much know when I'm eating too much, and exercising not enough. I just fear the consequences. I don't know if it would be good or bad for me. I once had a friend who didn't even know she was pregnant till her waist band didn't fit as it once had. She was "chronically thin," and didn't have to constantly check. I'm afraid of finding out for myself if the waistband fit trick would work. Report
I started at 328 lbs. in July of 2009. I "settled" for 160 lbs. as a goal, thinking I would never get there, but I made it on April 15, 2011. Then I proceeded to lose another 20 lbs., weighing in at 139.8 on November 3, 2011. When I see pictures of myself from that time I think perhaps I got too thin. I'm 5'4" and 62 years old, so 140 lbs. is probably a good weight for me. But when I consider the 15 lbs. (at least) of excess skin I have, perhaps 140 lbs. is too thin? Anyhow, today I weigh in much closer to 160 again. The only problem with that is I fear a regain of everything I lost, even though I've been at this weight now for almost a year. I still like how I look and all my clothes still fit. I just don't want to get any heavier.

That being said, I would never have told anyone how much I weighed at my heaviest. And having it out there now (I've been on the Today Show, and had articles about me in my local paper and a national magazine), I realize how much pressure that keeps on me to keep from going back up that high. Not only would it be disastrous for my health, everyone would know how much I weigh!!! Report
I am confident enough that I don't have to tell people my weight. I am over 200 lbs at 5'4 and I and everyone around knows that I am overweight. I am not a number ( my age or my weight) so the only one who needs the number is my doctor. I am also sure that I am more fit than many people my age or younger. I spent many years trying to lose weight and going on diets which I now know was a big mistake. I can say I eat healthy and keep fit. I am confident I will lose the weight slowly and I will focus on losing because I think this weight may affects my health negatively. Report
Nicole, normally I love everything you write and do but this post seemed off the mark for me. You seem to be trying to explain why you weigh more than what you (or others) think you should weigh.

I weigh more than I used to (I'm still healthy) and so I stopped weighing myself. Report
Its taken me a long time to admit weight is just a number. It wasn't until my daughter started kindergarten (8years ago) that I realized the pressure society puts on all of us. The school tried telling me she was overweight. She was skin and bones. It bothered me. Her doctor assured me that she was fine. She's always been tall. In 90th percentile growing up. She is now in 8th grade. She's taller than me and still growing. As she was growing up I noticed how her friends were smaller than her and wanted to make sure she felt good about herself and not to give in to pressure to be like others. Thats when I decided I wasn't trying to lose weight anymore. I was trying to get healthier. I joined a monthly challenge this month and for the first time posted my weight. I've avoided challenges like these just because of weight posting. Now I figure why not? Report
Ladies, please don't take this comment wrong. Most of you look just fine at the weight you are. It seems to me (an ancient person (I was born in the first half of the last century)) that women have some sort of emotional/brain bias against themselves of about 20-25 pounds.

In high school and college, one of the guys in my class was Richard Carpenter.
In my younger brother's class in high school was his younger sister, Karen. When they first started playing around the area, Karen was above the recommended "healthy zone" BMI. She was overweight, but not "fat". After winning the LA County "Battle of the Bands", they signed a contract with a small label company and their careers seemed as if they were just on "hold".

They signed a contract with a bigger label (A&M if I remember correctly - which was co-owned by Herb Alpert) and their careers took off. "Carpenters" were off to stardom. I had my first heart attack at 33, but I lived through the incident. Karen also had a heart attack at age 33, but she had been fighting anorexia for a number of years and wasn't strong enough to make it through.

Though neither my brother nor I could claim to have been friends with the two, just having gone to school with them made Karen's death almost personal. I read as much as I could about the disorder and I now know the root of it is a self-image, psychological problem, but when it occurs, it is very difficult to reach out to the person and get them to "realize" that they are not fat.

Please listen to your loved ones when they assure you that you are NOT Fat, particularly if your BMI is in the "average" or "below average" zones. ABSOLUTELY listen to your doctor when she/he tells you that you are underweight. My youngest son is short, as am I. He went through the KCPD Police Academy, and though he maxed the PT test, they told him he was "too fat" (at 5'8", he wears a 48 short suit jacket). He went to one of the weight clinics where they use the submersion test to determine body fat. When he returned and handed in the report attesting to his 16% body fat, they called the doctor and asked him to fax a copy of the report. They initially thought my son had somehow altered the report, but no, the faxed report was exactly the same as the report he had handed them.

I have Diabetes, and my Endocrinologist has told me I should never be at or less than the max "healthy BMI" plus 10%. His experience had shown him that Diabetics actually fared much better when they were in the "+ 10% range" then when other Diabetics were in the "Healthy BMI" range.

I know I'm in the minority here - as a man, but take my word for it. A lot of the ladies I've seen pictures of, here on Spark, DO NOT look like they need to lose another #10-20 pounds.

You are ALL beautiful ! Report
High weight: 341+ (that was the highest weight weighed, though I know I was heavier)
Low weight: 237 (in the middle of 4 weeks of gastro in Jan/Feb this year)
Current weight: 248 and dropping slowly from the 253 I got back to 2 weeks after the end of the gastro
Goal weight: 175 I know that seems high, but I am a 5ft 11 woman with a large frame and reasonable muscle mass. It's at the upper end of the healthy range (136-179) for my height, and if, when I get there, it is still a little high, I will aim a little lower. And if it works out it is a little low, I will be ok with 180, or even 185, or 190!. I have realistic expectations for my weight, and I am prepared to accept higher goals for my health's sake. During my bout of gastro I realised just how easy sinking into anorexia would be for me, despite my love of good food, so I know I will have to actively police my food intake every single day of my life. I have good days when I eat within my recommended calorie range. Some days I go over, especially when my diabetes plays up and I have hypos (low blood sugar). Some days I have major problems reaching the lower limit, especially if I am busy. But I am getting there. I am making a difference in my own life by being here and learning healthy habits. Report
Thanks Nicole. That made my day. The scale literally ruins my day and I don't need to feel that way anymore. Report
When I was obese @ 256 I never would weigh myself. Now that I am 93 lbs less. I weigh in every morning. Makes me very happy. Report
It's funny, I recently shared my weight of 172 pounds with my banker. Her response was "wow, you don't look like you're that heavy" , which made me think how a number may affect the way people see you, either positively, or negatively. I still have a small way to go, but I realize sometimes I too, get caught up in the number. Thanks for sharing your look great! Report
Thank you Nichole! It is wonderful that you are healthy, fit and shared your weight with us. Report
I'm 5'4" tall. My original goal of 140 is right on the money, I know after checking my frame size and it being large. Honestly, I'd settle for 160, seeing how my muscles tend to bulk up like a man's (which I have no hangups about)... Last night, I decided to use 140 as a guideline, and take the loss just 10 lbs. at a time, and stop when I was happy with my fitness and appearance, whether that number turns out to be 160 or 125. Report
I am 62, 5'2, 136 pounds. This is down from 142 which was my heaviest weight. I wanted to go to120 but I feel good and think 130 will do fine. And I am not crazed about that. Life is way too short and precious to be so consumed with the number on the scale. How I look in the mirror is good for me now. I always look at women my age and see how they look. That helps. I want to be fit not fat but not too thin.... Report
Just another great reminder of why I need to stay off the scale!! Report
This article just confused me more. I've been struggling to determine what my ideal weight goal should be. I think 150 pounds at a tall 5'8" is thin!? I am only 5'4" and when I plug a goal body fat percentage (24% for a 40 year old is considered in the 'ideal' range) into calculators I'm told I'd weigh in at 147! I think it would have been beneficial to know her age and body fat % to put this more into perspective. Report
I'm 5'5, and shooting for a goal weight of 145-150, which is the top portion of healthy on the BMI. Why? Because I have a large frame, and I'd look anorexic if I was at the bottom end of the BMI.

Since I haven't been in the "normal" range for at least 25 years, I have a feeling that I'll be content to be in that range (though I won't know for sure until I get there), even if it may be a little more than other women that are my height. After all, it's not about how they perceive me, it's about how I feel about myself. Report
I am 5' 4". Before, I had my daughter (almost 15 years ago), I averaged between 110 and 115. After, it was a long climb to a max of 175. I am now ... more or less 160. I have a hard time with scales because I can be one weight and 5 minutes later it can read 3 pounds heavier or lighter. I have found this true with most scales. The only one I am embarased to admit my weight to is my Mom who has been skinny her whole life (some times under weight). I told her my goal weight is now 130 and she told me that was still "awfully" overweight. She looks at a picture of me when I was 14 and underweight and thinks that is what I should look like. Muscle plays such a big factor in a person's weight. When I was 117 (age 27), right after my daughter's birth (7 pounds 6 oz), I couldn't hold her for 5 minutes with out my arms being tired. Now there are so many things I can do (muscle related) that I couldn't do then. I can not convice her that 130 would be a healthy weight and a good realistic goal, not the 110 I was as a young adult. Report and the scales don't mix
I've recently weighed myself at Curves after getting several different weigh-ins at dr's and am sticking by that and only that scale
OK...I'm happy with the weight at Curves too, not because it's lower but because it eventually became lower than all the others.
I'm like you, lots of muscle, love the strength and stamina that I get from them and would never give them away for anything not even a smaller number on the scales. Report
I to hate weighing my self , I only got weighed last month for the first time in 3 years and that was only because I was having an OP. Was a shock I am 5'7 and weigh 193 I am not big boned, I just seem to hold fat every were . I just see my clothes are getting looser so thats good enough for me Report
am 154 now am 5"0 feet tall and weight for me is a problem in 2003 i was 115 and i felt good but after my first child i gain 75 pounds those were hard to get off in 2008 i was 145 and i felt good but not my best.. and then i got pregnant again but this time i didnt gain more than 30 pounds i try my hardes to stay 154 pounds and i hate it i want to be 135-130 at least.. Report
I currently weigh about 334. When I was at my smallest in the Army I weighed about 189. I am 5'10". The military went by the tape measure system for body fat and said i was fat and needed to lose weight. I had no weight to lose. I have a very large frame. I wear size 13 shoes and size 10 on my ring finger when i was thin. I wore about a size 10. I cannot go by the weight charts for "ideal" weight. It doesnt work for me. Looking back when I grew up I always always thought I was fat and now I know I wasnt. I'm just a bigger person. I know where I should be to be healthy and happy for me. Not what they tell me to be. I would have to starve to get to their "ideal" weight for my height!! Report
I HATE the scale and endeavor not to use that as my benchmark. How my clothes fit (especially my panties-sorry folks) is easier for me to stomach. Report
I too, can relate to your blog....I am approx. the same heighth as you and have most always weighed more than my counterparts, even when I was fit and healthy and at my ideal weight of 150-155. I have never been ashamed of revealing my weight or my age...........I'm one of those that looks lighter and younger than I really am, however, I had to get serious when the airline and theater seats become uncomfortable to squeeze into! Reality check! Right now I am rather proud of my weight having started the year at 289....yesterday's weigh-in had me right at 250! WooHoo! I still have 100 lbs. to go, but I like to look at the glass half full and reflect on how far I've come and how much better I feel!! WooHoo!! Report
I'm always guessed to weigh less than I do, or I was until I went over 200. When I was 25 I went to a state fair & had one of those people that guess your weight guess me at 140 and I actually weighed 162, but was very strong and healthy (5'8"). Everyone was surprised, except me. I wore a size 10 for my wedding at 155, always thought 162 was too much, but now at around 225 for ages, would of course LOVE to get back to 162! I once went down to 135 and it was extremely fast, unhealthy and yoyo-ed up to 165 within 6 weeks. that was probably the worst thing I ever did to my body, because I have never been stable like I was since that time - almost 30 years ago! Get rid of the scale if it plays with your head!

It may be helpful for you to stand next to a friend who's figure you admire and see in a mirror how similar/different you are, because hard to see your self as others see you. Report
I've never been willing to let myself be ashamed of numbers - whether it was my weight or my age. In fact, years before I actually hit 250.5 I had put the weight on my driver's license / ID at 250.

I remember in high school in my junior year taking driver's education, the teacher asked if any of us weighed 150 pounds. I stood up. I was not at all overweight, nor was I particularly muscular - I'm just big-boned and busty. So when I look at my "ideal weight range" and see something like 128-162, I know the top end is the most realistic ... ESPECIALLY if I'm as fit as I want to be when I get near there. Report

I am 5' 11" and 150 pounds is skinny for me! I once got down to 144 and my boyfriend and sister did a mini-intervention and told me to stop dieting. My sister still says my head was too big for my body. Cracks me up since it can be interpreted two ways and both ways were true!

I didn't weigh myself from 1992 until last January. From 92 until 2000, my size stayed the same. My clothes didn't change and it was good for me to be away from using weight as a tool to pump myself up or put myself down.

I made a decision in 2000 to eat whatever I wanted as a coping mechanism for losing a sibling. I was still exercising but I gained weight. In 2003, I moved to another part of the country and couldn't easily exercise. I began buying elastic pants and just ate and ate.. until 2008.

Now, I weighed in today at 175 pounds. People tell me I look great .. and I do. Sometimes I think it would be nice to be at the 'low' end... but it passes.

You are awesome and weight means nothing. Report
LOL - love this blog topic - yes, I used to be pretty guarded about my weight -as if they couldn't pretty much guess what it was in my pre-exercise days :) -but now it's a non-issue - I still weigh a lot more than I should, in fact I'm still waiting to get into the 'overweight category' on the BMI chart (I'm 5' 2" and 181.5 lbs - that's a far cry from where I started 2 years ago at 245) - however this is the kicker, when I finally felt confident enough to reveal my weight to my workout buddies at the gym (they're all men) -they didn't believe me - in fact, they thought I was joking until they saw me programming my treadmill -then they still couldn't believe it - THAT made me feel fantastic. I'm replacing fat with muscle, insecurity with confidence, weakness with strength - and my larger wardrobe with smaller sizes all the time!!! I workout on average 5 days a week - usually 2 heavy cardio days with a short weight routine, and 3 weights days with lighter cardio - mixed in with some yoga and the odd boot camp or trx class. I don't have time for hang-ups about my weight anymore - now my biggest hang-up is trying to find clothes that fit me when I'm in-between sizes....I set lots of goals for myself and continue to work towards them - for 2012 I have a 5K in April and 10K in July planned, and I've started the wheels rolling to get my fitness instructor re-certification (20 years after first being certified!) - that 'number' on the scale is just that - a number. It will not define me, or limit my dreams or possibilities....kudos to everyone on this spark journey with me who is conquering the scale - WE CAN DO THIS! :) Report
This is exactly what I needed to hear right now and I have just made the same decision to stop weighing myself and judging myself based on a number and start looking in the mirror and really seeing what's there. You are such an inspiration. Report
Thank you!!!!! I think the BMI is the cruelest chart on the planet and the word OBESE is obscenity. I REALLY needed these posts this morning. Going to go make a healthy breakfast, get ready to work out and have a fantastic day. Report
Well... I don't exactly have the same story. I am about 5'7" or 5'8" and I weigh 205. But people always think that I don't weigh any more than 170 - in other words, I look like I weigh thirty pounds less than I actually do. I saw this article at a great point in my life, because just in the last two days I have decided that I don't care what I weigh. What is important is that I workout and eat right - be fit. If I lose weight doing that, great! But if not, I will know that I am fit - and that is what is important. I just hope I can stay committed to this! Report
Several years back it hit me that weight is just a number and not who I am. At work one day, a man and I were talking and weight came up and I mentioned my weight. He was shocked that I would actual say and I told him that the number can't define me. I have told several people my weight over the years when the topic comes up. It has helped me to be more comfortable and not make the number so important that I do unhealthy things to myself to reach that number. I currently as of today weigh 182 and I'm 5'1". So short and have some extra weight but it is not who I am. Report