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“How do you do it?” my friend asked me one day over coffee. “You’ve had some awful stuff happen to you over the years, but you’re still so cheerful. What gives?” My friend was right, my life had been rough at times. I’d gotten divorced and I’d been laid off a couple of times within a five-year period. I should have been angry and bitter, but I wasn’t. I was still looking forward to each new day and the possibilities ahead of me. While this was normal for me, my friend’s comment made me realize that not everybody felt the way I did. Why was I so optimistic, anyway? The Definition of Optimism Optimism comes from the Latin word optimus, meaning "best," which describes how an optimistic person is always looking for the best in any situation and expecting good things to happen. Optimism is the tendency to believe, expect or hope that things will turn out well. Even if something bad happens, like the loss of a job, an optimist sees the silver lining. For me, getting laid off was the catalyst that allowed me to start my own business. As I packed up my office, my mind was already whirling with the possibilities ahead. Without that push, I may never have made the leap to self-employment. Losing my job was a good thing after all. The emerging field of positive psychology studies the positive impact that optimism has on mental health. Other research shows that optimism may be good for my physical health too—optimists are sick less and live longer than pessimists. Apparently, a positive outlook on life strengthens the immune system (and the body's defenses against illness), cardiovascular system (optimists have fewer heart attacks), and the body's ability to handle stress. Happiness through Positive Self-Talk Being an optimist or a pessimist boils down to the way you talk to yourself. Optimists believe that their own actions result in positive things happening, that they are responsible for their own happiness, and that they can expect more good things to happen in the future. Optimists don’t blame themselves when bad things happen. They view bad events as results of something outside of themselves. I didn’t blame myself for losing my job, but saw it as a business decision that had nothing to do with me personally. Pessimists think the opposite way, however. They blame themselves for the bad things that happen in their lives and think that one mistake means more will inevitably come. Pessimists see positive events as flukes that are outside of their control—a lucky streak that probably won’t happen again. Because of their thought processes, optimists have much brighter futures. A bad circumstance or event is taken in stride, viewed as a temporary setback—not a permanent way of life. Even if something bad happens today, a positive thinker believes that good things will come again in the future. Optimists tend to share several other positive characteristics that increase overall happiness and promote health, while reducing depression and chronic stress:
Luckily, you can change your thinking patterns over time. Even a pessimist can become an optimist with enough practice! All you need to do is to reframe how you define events. Instead of dwelling on the bad experience, analyze it to figure out what good can come of it. Even if a project at work is deemed a failure, think about what you learned during the process. What strengths did you discover within yourself, and when can you use those talents again? Instead of blaming yourself for the failure, think about the outside influences that may have affected your project. Maybe you were delayed by outside vendors, so you couldn’t meet a deadline; or management decided to go in another direction, making your project redundant. Virtually any failure can be turned into a learning experience, which increases your potential for success in the future. Optimism is a skill of emotional intelligence, which translates to a better career and greater success in life. Life is too short to be miserable, so start turning your thinking around! Positive thoughts, an optimistic outlook, and overall happiness can advance your prospects for work, relationships and other life experiences. |
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Health & Wellness Articles › Emotional HealthOptimism and the Power of Positive ThinkingChange Your Thoughts, Change Your Life!-- By Leanne Beattie, Health & Fitness WriterSparkPeople advertisers help keep the site free! Learn more
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A freelance writer, marketing consultant and life coach, Leanne often writes about health and nutrition. See all of Leanne's articles. |
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Member Comments
Also - Optimists must believe that the world offers ample opportunities for everyone to succeed? That is a very American viewpoint. Many Americans grow up in abundance, and are taught that homeless people are lazy, don't want to succeed, etc. In reality there are *billions* of people on this planet who haven't been born with the advantages we have in the US. The world certainly doesn't offer them ample opportunities for success.
Optimism is just phony chipperness without an accurate view of reality. - 5/15/2013 3:23:44 PM
Its been a long process learning to smile at the worms antics, while enjoying the apple. : ) - 3/8/2013 10:30:27 AM
I am convinced that my choice is right for me. My relatives seem to dwell on misery, and perhaps, they are even "happy" in their misery----odd as it seems to me! - 2/26/2013 4:49:22 PM
I invite you to read the blog: http://laughingat
mynightmare.1
000notes.com/
And to check out his non-profit organization: http://laughingat
mynightmare.com/
Enjoy! - 2/26/2013 1:27:30 PM
In the words of the tennis player, Arthur Ashe I would tend to agree with his philosophy which is, " Start where you are.
Use what you have. Do what you can".Sometimes Opimimism is based on ignorance that gives one positive self talk because they don't understand why or how their circumstances came about.
The parents of the 20 young children killed in Newtown would, I think have a difficult time to put a positive spin on the loss of their children.
Their are certain realities in life that are random and extremely negative. Perhaps the best way to approach such situations is to face the problem and try to find solutions for it. If there are no solutions and negative thoughts rule the day I suppose professional help might be needed. When Elizabeth Kubler Ross suffered a massive stroke that left her completely dependent upon care givers she couldn't accept her own principles concerning acceptance and working through physical adversity until final resolution to the situation was attained. When it comes to weight loss I would apply Arthur Ashe's Philosophy which in effect allows you "To accept where you are (when the scale reads weight gain). Try another food plan," Use what you have", and thus, " Do what you can".
Everything in life in terms of thinking has degrees. We can't be all positive or all negative in our thoughts if we want to feel happy. What we can do is isolate the REASONS behind both kinds of thinking and balance them so as to acheive some sort of workable equilibrium.
Elizabeth - 2/26/2013 10:03:17 AM
It needs a lot of 'training' to change the frequency, but it's worth the effort. Re-wiring my way of thinking required an amount of determination equivalent to the energy I wasted thinking in negative way.
- 2/26/2013 8:50:55 AM
I agree with a lot of what DANJODEA posted about a good balance between optimism and pessimism.
I would describe myself as a realistic optimist. With that being said...Here's hoping everyone has great things happen in 2013! - 1/5/2013 10:06:52 AM