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“I really want to lose weight. I hate the way I look and feel, and I know things will be much better when I get the weight off. But I just can’t stay motivated to do it. I think there must be something wrong with me.” If this sounds like something you say to yourself, I’ve got good news for you. There probably isn't anything seriously wrong with you. You have a very common problem that affects many people who want to lose weight—expecting your negative feelings about your body to do something they can’t do. The motivation you need to successfully lose weight is like a fire. It will burn hot and long when you provide it with the fuel it needs, but it will die out quickly if you don’t. Disliking how you look and feel might provide decent kindling to get the weight-loss fire started, but it's not the proper fuel source to keep it going. When you’re driven by negative thoughts about yourself, you just don’t have the raw materials that are necessary to achieve the results you want. This problem lies in how our minds work. If I were to tell you, for example, that I'll give you $1,000 if you can manage to not let the thought of "chocolate" enter your mind during the next 60 seconds, do you think my bank balance would be in big trouble? I don’t. It’s certain that some of your next few thoughts would have something to do with chocolate. Most likely, you’ll wonder how you can stop yourself from thinking about chocolate for 60 seconds—oops, too late! You lose, and my $1000 stays safely in my bank account. It’s virtually impossible to not think about something for a minute, when that’s what you set out to do. Try it for yourself. The same thing happens when you set out to lose weight because you don’t like your body. The first thing you’re likely to do every morning is notice how fat you still are, think about the food you can’t eat, or lie in bed, wishing you didn’t have to get up early to exercise. You might as well throw a big bucket of ice water on that motivational fire of yours, because sooner or later, you’re going to get very weary of this constant struggle and give up. So, what’s the alternative? What do you do if the reason you want to lose weight is because you don’t like the way you look or feel? Where do you find the right fuel for your motivational fire? Continued › |
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Motivation Articles › Staying MotivatedA Little Imagination Can Boost Your MotivationBuilding a Better Body Image-- By Dean Anderson, Behavioral Psychology ExpertSparkPeople advertisers help keep the site free! Learn more
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About The Author
Dean Anderson
Dean Anderson has master's degrees in human services (behavioral psychology/stress management) and liberal studies. His interest in healthy living began at the age of 50 when he confronted his own morbid obesity and health issues. He joined SparkPeople and lost 150 pounds and regained his health. Dean has earned a personal training certification from ACE and received training as a lifestyle and weight management consultant. See all of Dean's articles. |
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Member Comments
Again, thank you. :-) - 1/27/2013 12:17:24 AM
Thank you so much - 4/20/2012 8:28:45 AM
.for me the negative thinking always keep me in the disgust mode. Especially, when I constantly compare myself to what society expects. At the end of the day, I know it's a mind thing and I need to be happy within myself first. - 3/11/2012 5:52:04 PM
Oh and BTW, I agree with JSAMERO that your statement:
"You could imagine, for example, that a secret group of very rich and powerful people use the media, fashion and advertising industries to convince people that they need to be thin, hard-bodied, and youthful to be happy, so they’ll keep buying diet books, magazines and gimmicks." is the actually the truth. - 3/5/2012 4:49:44 PM
g me!!!! - 9/20/2011 6:38:53 AM
, I had the healthy glow but I WAS WEARING SPANDEX. Then the thought came to me-would I still do this if I knew I was always going to look the same? The real epiphany was yes, I would because I feel so much better. Then up popped this article...coincid
ence? - 7/23/2011 5:16:38 PM
...Well, that's not too hard to imagine- it's the truth, isn't it? :-P
Great article though! - 3/5/2011 3:01:55 AM
I'm having much more success by taking a self-care perspective and being compassionate with myself if I've had a day where my choices could have been better. I don't have the "all or nothing" perspective that always set myself up for failure in the past. Rather than focusing on all the ways I fail to meet rigid (and unrealistic) goals, I focus on the good choices I HAVE made.
I've had a horrible self-image from the time I was young, but that's changing since I started SparkPeople. I'm not putting off living until I'm a certain size or weight. Progress, not perfection. When I'm taking care of myself, I feel much more comfortable in my own skin. I don't look at my image in the mirror with the scorn I once felt. I'm feeling better about myself and THAT's changing what I see in the mirror. And, it feels a lot better - and is far more motivating - than shaming myself. If I don't take care of myself with loving kindness, who will?
- 3/4/2011 5:11:51 PM