SparkPeople advertisers help keep the site free! Learn more

Motivation Articles  ›  Picking Yourself Back Up

5 Things You Can Learn from Your Mistakes

Find Life Lessons When You're Less Than Perfect

-- By Jennipher Walters, Certified Personal Trainer and Fitness Instructor
SparkPeople advertisers help keep the site free! Learn more
I've always known that I'm a bit of a perfectionist. In high school, a B was never enough. In college, being in the middle of the bell-shaped curve wouldn't do. While the do-everything-perfectly mentality has pushed me in my adult life to advance my career and start my own business, my Type-A personality hasn't always been a blessing. In fact, it's taught me much over the years, namely that not being perfect at everything is OK—even better at times.

Earlier this year, I had one of the most difficult—and memorable—months of my life. I lost a grandparent, ran my first marathon, and found myself putting in 60+ hours a week during a challenging time at work. Within 30 days, despite the exhilaration at my marathon achievement, I was spent. Emotionally and physically drained, I kept working. Kept pushing. Kept running. I made the mistake of thinking that if I went harder and harder in all areas of my life, eventually I would push through to the other side, fixing my work-life balance issues, aching hips, and sagging energy levels. But that wasn't the case. The harder I pushed, the more my life pushed back, eventually crippling me for a full week of "why me?" crying and anger that I couldn't have what I wanted. I was an adult, acting like a child and throwing a total tantrum, complete with outburst, and arms and legs flailing in disgust at my own self.

After a week of this, I had what you might call an epiphany, or as Oprah might say, an "ah-ha moment." I realized that my dedication and drive for perfection, which I thought had been a good trait, was holding me back. It was stopping me from being happy, and that it was keeping me from accepting some realities: that my hip was injured and I would have to take time off from running, that my grandfather really was gone, and that working more hours wasn't (ironically enough) getting the job done. In a flash of a moment, I realized that I was making a huge mistake: I was fighting against what was. And I was paying the price.

I immediately made a pact with myself to not fall into this trap again, but to learn from my mistakes. I learned the power of taking time off, listening and respecting my body, going with the flow, being easy on myself and finding happiness in the present. I, in a nutshell, learned to embrace imperfection and to find a valuable lesson in my mistake.

While my story and what I learned is very personal and poignant for me, its lessons universal. Here are five takeaways from my experience that may also apply to you.

Take Time Off
All work and no play doesn't just make Jack a dull boy; it also makes us sad, unhappy and less productive individuals. In order for you to reach any goal, you need to take time to recharge those batteries and relax. That's why employers offer vacation days to their workers! Whether it's a night off from the gym to go see a movie with a friend, or a long, hot bath and the end of an even longer day, be sure to take at least 15 minutes each day to do something just for you. If you're the primary caregiver in your house, this may seem impossible, but it's true that you can't take care of anyone unless you take care of yourself, so block off some me time and have some fun! Also remember that even the most dedicated exercisers and athletes need to rest and recover, so build downtime into your workout plans if you hope to take your fitness to the next level.

Don't Force It
You can't force things to happen. No matter how much you want something or how hard you work to make it happen, sometimes you just have to wait it out. Whether it's your perfect job or those last 10 pounds, life is a process. Instead, try to trust that you're on the right path, and keep at it. Slowly but surely, you'll eventually get there. Don't work harder, work smarter—and figure out how you can get to your goal without risking your sanity or well-being. You know what's not productive? Burnout.

Respect Your Limits
I learned this lesson hard during and after my marathon training. Despite a nagging hip ache, I kept running and stuck to my training schedule. Then, for the entire marathon, I didn't just endure 26.2 miles, but 26.2 miles of pain that sidelined me for weeks after the race was over. I learned the hard way that listening to your body is so important. If you're really fatigued, take a day off. If you're sick and have no energy, rest. Pushing through physical pain, emotional pain, and fatigue is never a good idea. Listen closely to what your body is telling you, and treat it like you would your best friend. Be loving, kind and respectful.

Go with the Flow
Life is a journey that doesn't come with a map. You can't always see the destination or every curve, dip or detour along the way, so you might as well enjoy the process (and the ups and downs). So you didn't hit your weight-loss goal this week because the weather prevented you from your daily walks? It's time to get creative. Rent a fitness DVD at the library or devise your own home-based workout. And always be sure to keep that sense of humor and see the opportunity in the problem. When life gives you lemons, don't just smash them. Instead make yummy (sugar-free) lemonade and savor every sip!

Enjoy Now
Why wait for to reach your goal to be happy, wear that dress, or take that vacation? Life is too short. Feel good about yourself today and give yourself the permission and freedom to be completely happy with yourself and your circumstances right now. Try to be present in the moment as much as you can and appreciate life for what you do have. Love where you are and who you are. Don't wait for tomorrow or until you reach that goal to appreciate where you are. You're worthy and good enough right now, today.


Mistakes offer us chances to learn and grow, and in these failures, you'll find wisdom for reaching any goal, be it weight-loss, health, fitness, professional or something else. After all, as James Joyce once wrote, “A man's errors are his portals of discovery.” What can you start learning from your mistakes?
Click here to to redeem your SparkPoints
  You will earn 3 SparkPoints
Page 1 of 1   Return to main motivation page »

Related Content


Stay in Touch With SparkPeople

Subscribe to our Newsletters

About The Author

Jennipher Walters Jennipher Walters
Jennipher is a certified personal trainer, group exercise instructor, and lifestyle and weight management consultant. She blogs regularly about her own fitness adventures at www.fitbottomedgirls.com.

See all of Jenn's articles.

Member Comments

  • I have learned, to live in the now, enjoy life and work on my life list as when you're about ot kick the"bucket" unlike the movie, it is already too late. I'm not one to say, "if I knew then, what I know now because, when I know and where I am now, is really, where I need to be, thanx be to God. I have learned, to accept the things I cannot change (other people) as if it is to be, it starts with me. It's all in attitude.........
    mine! Keep up the good work as you can take someone to the water, however you cannot make them drink! Thank you for your testimony! - 2/26/2013 1:51:07 AM
  • I am a bit type A, though not to the extent of this author. I am injured AGAIN. Between this article and Coach Nicole, I think I have decided to check out some strength training videos. I also think I'm going to see if just 10 minutes of walking a day aggravates the injury. 50 minutes sure does! - 2/9/2013 9:16:37 AM
  • WOW! I love your paragraph on "enjoy now". I keep waiting until I fit into that dress, or am able to jog a 5-k....Why wait!?!?

    I am making healthy steps every day and should enjoy the journey, not look anxiously toward when I am "perfect"

    Thank you! - 2/8/2013 9:11:33 AM
  • Jenn, Most of us can relate to your Ah Ha and fall into some or all of the traps. Weight loss is a huge thing... and being a perfectionist is a trap. We all must find our own rythmn of life... and its different for different people. And it changes as our own health changes. Listening to your body ... Realizing you are "good enough"... stop beating yourself up for being you...
    I am coming back from the dead... literally and my pace three years ago was almost "Stop". Now it is proceed slowly and listen to your body. I AM ... and this makes me feel very alive and happy as I see the progress. I want to finish the race... but I don't have to be the first. - 2/5/2013 7:54:16 PM
  • Great article. I'm so glad I read it. I've been in the dumps for awhile. My husband has been unemployed going on 4 months, the holiday season was not so great and my health has been up and down. I agree that we need to take time to enjoy ourselves even if it's just for a few hours. I plan to be more positive starting today.

    - 2/5/2013 7:41:36 AM
  • This is a great article -- I can relate to not knowing when to respect my own limits. Whether its exercising too hard, eating too little, or working too much, tuning into and listening to what my body actually needs helps every time. - 1/27/2013 11:29:18 PM
  • THEGRASSCUTTER
    Enjoyed this very much. I like a lot of people, am getting a few years under the belt along with health problems that comes with age. I know my limitations and try to keep that in mind. I am 70 yrs old and my long goal is to live to be 100. You have to have something to work towards. Knee, ankle and back keeps me aware of what I can do. I'm from North Carolina and right now we are going through some cold weather so I have to stay inside more than I want. But spring is just around the corner. Keep up the positive writing. It sure does help. - 1/27/2013 2:15:22 PM
  • Good article, to see more about learning from your mistakes watch this video at http://www.youtub
    e.com/watch?v
    =HYMWEM8m2tQ
    or visit our website at http://www.LearnF
    romYourMistak
    e.com - 1/14/2013 10:20:08 AM
  • Great article! I feel like she was speaking right to me! - 1/8/2013 7:49:31 PM
  • LOVEXAVIE
    Great article! So glad I found it and thank you for writing it!! - 12/30/2012 11:36:53 PM
  • LGROVES1
    RIGHT ON! I like this article. - 12/25/2012 8:57:51 PM
  • This article hit a little closer to home than I was prepared. I am so ready to live life NOW! I will not let the quest for perfection be my conqueror. - 8/17/2012 6:33:12 PM
  • Reading your article was like reading about myself. I like your positive perspective, because I know all too well the pitfalls of perfectionism. Well said! Thank you for sharing your experiences and insight. It Reminds me of some important lessons, and an alternative way of looking at myself. - 8/17/2012 4:31:25 PM
  • i can relate to this so much. I am always comparing myself to my perception of 'the best' and of course this is a moving target and leads to dissatisfaction. I am learning (albeit slowly!) to enjoy the moment, appreciate the small changes and learning from my experiences. I try not to compare myself to anyone, although i find this hard, as I am my own unique person on my own unique journey, just like everyone else - 8/25/2011 3:46:35 AM
  • That's me to a T....such good advice, yet I feel myself giving mental assent to your words while developing new schemes of greatness and how I will beat myself up to achieve them. I too have my own business and confess to being Super Woman - I even have the shirt :-) I normally wake up every 2 hours for no apparent reason all night long, every single night. This week I planted a vegetable garden and totally enjoyed getting dirty, standing there watering and admiring my little beauties and I slept for a solid 4 hrs, then fell back asleep for another 4 hrs. Stress maybe?? Thank you so much, I put your article in my favorites! - 6/2/2011 7:59:30 AM