Motivation Articles

''I Thought I'd Always Be Fat''

One Member Shares What a Difference a Year Makes

322SHARES
One year ago, I went to lunch with a co-worker. When the waitress came over to take our drink order, I ordered a Diet Coke. The woman looked me up and down, snorted, then asked, "Diet?" in a very snotty voice. I just sat very still and said, yes. My co-worker kept his gaze down and pretended it didn't happen. I made a face, but then thought that maybe the slight was in my head. Maybe I'm being overly sensitive. Maybe she wasn't making a comment on my weight. When she came back with my soda and my co-worker's iced tea, she also brought a glass of water. As she placed my soda down onto the table she said, "Now drink your water. There's 'no refills' on soda." Throughout the meal she came by and refilled my co-worker's iced tea and gave me dirty looks. It was completely and totally humiliating. I didn't finish my meal or the soda. I wanted to. I was hungry. I just couldn't let her win.

Of course, by acting differently than I normally would have, I had already let her win. She wanted to make me feel bad, and she succeeded. I should've said something. I should've drank my soda and told her I'd pay for another. I should've asked to speak with her supervisor. Something. But I didn't do any of that. I just let her walk all over me.

You might think that was the moment I turned my life around, but no. The next couple of days came and went. I felt miserable about myself and stuffed my face with cookies, which made me feel even more miserable. I knew I needed to get control of the situation, but I had no idea how. My whole family is obese and I have been for most of my life. I didn't grow up eating well-balanced meals at home. We ordered out all of the time, sometimes more than once a day. Nutrition labels meant nothing to me. The only ways I thought of trying to lose weight were drastic. I had briefly tried Medifast, but I was so calorically deprived that I felt weak all of the time and was extremely moody. I had tried restricting what I ate on my own, but experienced similar results. In both cases, my diet would last a couple of weeks and end by bingeing when I just couldn't take it anymore. I hated myself for it. I figured that losing weight was something I was just never going to be able to achieve. I was always going to be fat—someone to be made fun of at restaurants.
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322SHARES

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Member Comments

  • I enjoyed reading your story. It was very inspiring Alexa!! - 12/5/2014 10:07:01 PM
  • I've been in a rut and I landed upon this article. So moving! Thank you for sharing your story.

    "Don't stress if you ate McDonald's three times yesterday, if you ate a whole pack of Oreos just now or if you just ate your weight in Ben & Jerry's last week. Tomorrow really is a new day. That's not just a saying. Life isn't all or nothing. And neither is the weight loss process. You don't have to give up anything that you don't want to. You don't have to starve yourself. You don't have to hate yourself. You just have to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and keep on going." Thank you! - 10/20/2014 12:04:16 PM
  • KAT_PAR
    I hope 365 days from now I am a healthier me! Such an inspirational story! - 10/15/2014 3:30:05 PM
  • Such a great story! A story of encouragement to others in the same place you were to give hope that others can find success in the weight loss journey and be successful too! Thank you for your blog! - 10/9/2014 7:32:12 AM
  • SKINNYMELISA
    Wow! Such a great article on a day I need it! - 9/30/2014 4:32:49 PM
  • I just joined Sparkpeople a few hours ago and your article was so inspirational, it gives me hope. Thank you so much for sharing your story. - 8/27/2014 5:24:10 AM
  • T2SPARK
    I am so glad I read this article. I have lost 11 pounds in last 3 months, hasnt been easy. But feels like I have just hit a wall. I know I need to keep going. But one failure leads to another and I have let 2 weeks pass by and added the 3 pounds back. I am going to dust off and start again. Thank you! - 8/5/2014 9:06:41 PM
  • Sorry that your journey started in pain, but glad that you are growing from it. Thanks for sharing the Spark with others! - 8/5/2014 1:48:22 PM
  • Thanks for sharing. I'd like to give that waitress a swift kick! - 6/4/2014 12:18:11 AM
  • Wow! Such a motivating and encouraging story. I could relate to so much of it. - 5/29/2014 9:34:34 PM
  • Inspirational story. Thanks for posting! Gives us hope out here.

    Susan - 3/26/2014 9:28:08 AM
  • Well, I'm back at Sparkpeople.... again. Once again, I am going to try to lose the weight. And your article was the first thing I saw. Thank you so much for the inspiration! And congratulations on your success! - 12/25/2013 11:32:09 PM
  • Very good points in this article... thank you... very inspiring and helpful! :) - 12/6/2013 11:23:14 PM
  • Hats off to you Alexa !!! - 12/5/2013 2:13:40 AM
  • MOMOBELLS
    this was a big help for me because today i stepped on the scale and realized i did not lose any weight like i thought i had my scale was just off :( but this made me feel a lot better and motivated!! - 10/19/2013 3:51:21 PM

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