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CROYLE55 Posts: 1,456
6/6/15 6:49 A

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I have now been a diabetic for 5 years. I came out of the hospital a diabetic on insulin I researched and read a number of books, magazines and articles. . Yes I was told to eat 35-45 carbs per meal and two 15 carb snacks. I did not get to see the diabetic Educator until after the first month of being a diabetic. When we met for two hours and told her what I had been doing and that I had BS under control she said I knew more then her and did not have to go to the class because I was up on diabetes. i When I would follow there diet my blood sugars were up and down. When I keep my carbs low every thing is great. Last year I ended up in the hospital and the portions for meal were 80 to 90 carbs. I told the dietician I can not eat like this I am a diabetic and she looked at me like I was nuts. You just have to find what is right for you. Make healthy meals for you and your husband. I have been off insulin for 18 months. I had 3 different doctors tell me I would never get off insulin. I also lost a good friend two months ago who I met here on spark. We emailed back and forth on the phone. She exercised ate right and died of a heart attack. They also believe it was from not wearing her cpap machine. She was 61.

Your husband is probably in denial. All's you can do is educate him and hopefully change his life style. Try getting him to eat apples after a meal. It helps with the blood sugar because of the fiber.

I wish you the best of luck

Love and Light Carol

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FANCYQTR's Photo FANCYQTR Posts: 14,963
6/5/15 11:40 P

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I just asked the same about the diabetes educators, dietitians and nutritionists pushing carbs to those with diabetes. If a person has high numbers when they eat a certain amount of carbs, why are they pushing more carbs instead of lower carbs. There are so many who don't keep up with research, either.

I have also lost friends due to complications from the diabetes. One friend was not even 50 when she had a major heart attack. She completely ignored that she had diabetes. I'm having problems keeping control of my eating, too, but I am trying hard.

I have one friend who eats green beans some, but her mainstays are high carbs like bread and high starch (pasta, rice, etc.) She insists that all her numbers are normal, though. I don't see how she can live that way.



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AMARANTH13's Photo AMARANTH13 Posts: 1,237
6/5/15 6:24 P

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Same here, and they're still doing it. Most diabetes 'educators' I have dealt with seem to know very little about diabetes. I wonder how long they are in school. Maybe they should have some real diabetics teach the educators what it's like instead of just following what they're spoonfed without thinking. SHe told me that 'carbs are not the enemy' and 'I should not cut any food out'. So if carbs are not the enemy why do they lead to complications and why do I feel sooo much better if I cut them out? But I'm preaching to the choir here. And maybe there -are- people for whom the normal 45 percent carbs diet works well to control their sugars, but I haven't met any.

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GLIOWIENRAYNA's Photo GLIOWIENRAYNA Posts: 68
6/5/15 5:42 P

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I had the same experience with the Diabetes Educator .... pushed high-carbs and wanted me to eat more white pasta?

Nearly landed me in the hospital.

So I traded that chick in on a real nutritionist and it's been much better.

Not sure what they are teaching these "educator" but so many of them push high carb...I just don't get it.

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LITTLEWIND53's Photo LITTLEWIND53 Posts: 17,180
6/5/15 4:42 P

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Just a few thoughts......
I have never had to worry about anyone else because I live alone...... and have had sooooo many problems of my own in not accepting/dealing with my diabetes.

When I did try to get serious, I was sent to a so called "Diabetic Nutritionist (who appeared to be fresh from school) and tried to force high-carb eating on me because it was "healthy". When I went back to my doctor, I told him I would not go back to that person and told him why. He shook his head in disbelief..... Ever since then, I have vocalized that we must look for Nutritionists who are actually experienced in Diabetic eating.....

Of course all the correct information and customized meal plans will not help unless the person is willing to work at it themselves.

Refuse to let junk food in the house, (if he really wants it, he can keep it in the garage, not not in the house) and keep healthy snacks around. Lots of cut up veggies that can healthy, fresh lemons to make lemon water instead of pop, things like that.

I hope he learns sooner, rather than later. As I deal with all my complications, I wish I had taken the matter seriously before I totally destroyed my health and body.....

Linda

Leader: Living with Diabetes
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1CRAZYDOG's Photo 1CRAZYDOG Posts: 470,653
6/5/15 3:53 P

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I can only add that for sure, YOU do not have to prepare foods that you know are not what should be eaten. You are in charge of cooking, and I would cook what I know is healthy. If something different is wanted, that's up to him. Hard as heck, but you definitely need to make YOU a priority, and you have all the reasons to do so . . . diabetic complications!

Love is the root of all things good in life.


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GLIOWIENRAYNA's Photo GLIOWIENRAYNA Posts: 68
6/5/15 3:39 P

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Watching my husband die is what's helped to motivate me to do better. I want to die old and happy, with all my fingers, toes, and eyesight....thank you very much.

The hardest part is letting go of the idea you can do anything other than just lead by example. It sounds cold, but like the old saying.....put your own air-mask on first. Start getting things ready to be widowed.

Seeing you get ready (calmly and quietly) and watching you get healthier and healthier might be the motivation he needs.

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AMARANTH13's Photo AMARANTH13 Posts: 1,237
6/5/15 3:38 P

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I guess showing by example is the best I can do. and I think I will put my foot down about if I put effort into the food (cooking) I'm not going to make him anything I think is unhealhty. If he wants it that's his business but I will not be a collaborator.

@GLIOWIENRAYNA: thank you for telling your story, I will show it to him and hope it will make him think. Though I have to be careful since he is easily overwhelmed and will run to food to feel better. I've been working on that myself too. But if I scare him too much about this new diagnosis that might have the same effect. It's all a delicate balance!

The problem is the fact that so many health professionals still claim that it's fine to eat normal and use insulin to control problems. The insulin is usually begun too late, if you get neuropathy on sugars of 140 then an A1C of 7 is already dangerous and they don't give insulin until that reaches a 9. Meaning you already have complications by then. But according to mainstream tight control (control good enough to prevent complications) makes people unable to follow it. And that is true (I fight very hard to keep my sugars down and I already have neuropathy, so my control clearly wasn't tight enough). But does that mean that we should give up trying it if 20 percent of people drops out? Advising better nutrition for type 2 with tight control and lower carbs could help the other 80 percent who are able to do it... I wish they would stop this one size fits all stuff.

But yes, his choice, that much is clear. If he runs out to go get sugary foods I couldn't stop him anyways, I can see that.


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1CRAZYDOG's Photo 1CRAZYDOG Posts: 470,653
6/5/15 3:18 P

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Sadly enough what's being said is true -- unfortunately, there is not anything you can MAKE another person do. It is so frustrating to say the least. All we can do is take care of US so we're on top of OUR own game.

Personally having type 2 and knowing what can happen if you don't take care of it scares me enough to do what I need to. but not everyone feels like that.

sending hugs

Love is the root of all things good in life.


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DONNAEDA's Photo DONNAEDA Posts: 30,939
6/5/15 2:43 P

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your answer is a good one. Its his life, you cannot control it. All you can do is present him with healthy foods. What he eats outside the house is his business.

Donna
Brown Deer, WI
leader of Weight Watchers Support team - leader
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individual.asp?gid=30504

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GLIOWIENRAYNA's Photo GLIOWIENRAYNA Posts: 68
6/5/15 2:29 P

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You're probably not going to like my answer.

It's his life. He has to make his own choices, and live with the consequences.

He's choosing not to believe what he doesn't want to hear, typical actually.

And where do I get off saying that?

My late husband was also diabetic and had the philosophy he could just eat "normal" and adjust his insulin accordingly.

He died at age 45 of a heart attack while in surgery on his eye. The problem with the eye was diabetes related - from not being healthily controlled. His heart attacked caused by what????

Not eating healthy.

He didn't have to live with the consequences of his actions...he died. I on the other hand live the consequences of his actions every day I wake up alone.

Read him this, then make an appointment with an estate planner and start getting set up to be alone. Wish I had.

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AMARANTH13's Photo AMARANTH13 Posts: 1,237
6/5/15 12:58 P

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My husband was diagnosed yesterday with type 2. I've been type 2 for about 4 years now and work very hard to keep my bloodsugars in control with a low carb lifestyle. THe problem is that the way my husband looks at low carb and mine are completely different. He doesn't like to take medication but at the same time he thinks low carb is unhealthy (though I do eat fruit!) I can't convince him that white flour, white rice and potatoes are really not necessary to stay healthy. I cook for both of us and I used to make an easy and quick starchy side for him when I made a low carb main meal for us both.

But now with his diabetes diagnosis I don't want to do that anymore. I don't want to make it even worse but he's convinced a 'normal diet' is the best, and he doesn't agree that his diet probably caused the type 2. He's overweight and I also know from reading up on it that low carb is preferable to lose weight for type 2s as well over getitng insulin and then trying to lose weight. Also his A1C isn't high enough to need insulin, I'm sure they'll start him on Metformin.

Have any of you dealt with similar situations and how did it work out for you? Is it a 'let's agree to disagree' situation? Am I right to want to stop cooking starches for him or is that unreasonable? Or should I just let him make the sides himself if he really wants them?

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