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CGSTAR41's Photo CGSTAR41 Posts: 84
1/27/11 10:16 P

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TOMIEJEAN's Photo TOMIEJEAN Posts: 360
2/17/08 2:25 P

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sweetlea
that is great that you have so much support. It is wonderful to have someone to count on all the time. keep up the good work.

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SWEETLEA23's Photo SWEETLEA23 Posts: 1,262
2/17/08 2:17 P

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My hubby is really supportive of my new lifestyle and encouraging too. Yesterday was a bad day for me (more to come in a blog) and this morning he reminded me I said in the beginning I knew there would be bad days. He said he was proud I was picking back up this morning. He also encourages me with my workouts and my progress. Eating wise he has been eating the meals I fix and has even cut back himself. Hubby is seeing some weight loss without much effort on his part right now which is exciting for him.

My mom is really supportive and even takes it into consideration for what she has at her home for meals when I'm visiting. My dad didn't say much at first but he's made a couple comments here recently about my progress and how well I'm doing.

Edited by: SWEETLEA23 at: 2/17/2008 (14:17)
--Jenn

"It's hard to beat a person that never gives up." ~ Babe Ruth


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TOMIEJEAN's Photo TOMIEJEAN Posts: 360
2/17/08 12:12 P

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Miranna

I would love to tell you to bring mom's baking over here but it would be the death of me. LOL I am going to take a page from your book and maybe even use your words with my hubby. That is exactly how I feel. I know it will offend him but I have to own this not him.

thank you for sharing I hope this helps others too.
tomie

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VIRGOGAL72's Photo VIRGOGAL72 SparkPoints: (5,762)
Fitness Minutes: (3,449)
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2/17/08 10:38 A

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For me it is my mom (love her heart), but she has always rewarded, comforted us with food. She is a great cook/baker and that is my downfall. Initially, she would make cookies, pies, cakes ect and say."You can have one piece, cant you?" In fear of offending her, I say sure. This was the full fledge, butter, sugar kind of foods and her little pieces are huge. This is only one element of many that helped me 'off the wagon' many, many times before.

1 month ago she did it again. She made an pineapple upside down cake - my favorite. She said the same thing and I replied "I sure can, but I need a very small piece". She cut me a huge piece and I said to her (which was very very hard) "Mom, I love your baking, but for me to succeed at loosing this weight that is going to kill me if I don't, I need a smaller piece". "I can have half of that piece today and the other half tomorrow". I thanked her and that opened up the conversation of making it healthier. I posed a question to her about how to make it healthier and she took it really good.

Two weeks ago she made a pie, but she used splenda, fat free milk and it tasted great. She cut me a small small sliver and just smiled and said "I am proud of you". That was a big breakthrough for us.

I feel it is about owning your own life and sweetly and politely sharing your feelings, being appreciative, but owning the situation. This is a big lesson for me and it is still a work in progress, but for once in my life I am contiously trying to control what enters MY body.

Hope this babble was understandable.



"I'm gonna love myself more than anyone else. I Believe in me. I'm gonna be my own best friend, stick with me till the end , won't lose myself again. Stronger woman - I AM! ~ Miranna
Start Date: 1/7/08 GW: 123.0 lbs SW: 242.0 lbs CW: 218.0 lbs
Loss to date: 24.0 lbs.
BL#5: 6/1 - 7/28: Goal 199 lbs/ 219 lbs/215.5lbs
Summer Meltdown: 6/1- 9/1: Goal 190 lbs/219 lbs/215.5lbs


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KIMMIEB831's Photo KIMMIEB831 Posts: 1,023
2/17/08 8:32 A

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They think they support me but they really don't. For instance my mom asks me over for dinner all the time and when i tell her no because I really just want to watch what I eat and blah blah she gets a tude' and then at home I cook for myself most of the time but the roommate (ex long story) some times eat so I try to buy things we both can eat. But like TomieJean said basically we are the only ones in control.

TOMIEJEAN's Photo TOMIEJEAN Posts: 360
2/17/08 8:18 A

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I don't think it is intentional but the portions he doles out are LARGE. for example we had pizza the other night and I was going to stick to 2 pieces. before I finished the 2nd he put a third on my plate. Part of the reason (I think) is that is the way I used to eat and he hasn't adjusted yet. also I did not tell him ahead of time that I only planned on 2 pieces.

I also think that he is not jealous but bothered that he can not lose any weight right now. He has a serious back injury and is awaiting surgery. He can not do any exercise. He has tried and ends up down for several days any time he does anything. So he might be unconsciously trying to keep me at his level.

There is my mother who ,god love her, wants me to be healthy, but has always used food and shopping as a fix for everything. She still does so any little gifts are candy or shirts. Often it is candies.

Then last but not least is the kids (one 13yr and the twins are 4) they do not finish their meals and out of habit I find myself cleaning their plate. I have gotten better about it but I really have to pay attention to it. Also they usually won't eat what we make so there are several different things made at dinner and I feel like I have to eat a little of everything.

I guess after reading this I realize that I am the only one with the power to stop the destructive behaviors. They can't force me to eat what I know I don't need. The only problem is I have such guilty feelings when I don't eat what they put in front of me.

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MESACHICK Posts: 3,728
2/16/08 9:20 P

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No, but I feel like I have to cook 2 - sometimes 3 - separate meals. My hubby started Atkins this week, so now he just throws it all on the grill (meat!), but it still feels so separated.

Just out of curiosity - how does he encourage you to eat more? Does he say you're not eating enough, or just offers you seconds, or what? Is he trying to be a saboteur, or is he just trying to seem more supportive by showing that he thinks your portions are too small or something?

Husbands are interesting things sometimes. :-)

TOMIEJEAN's Photo TOMIEJEAN Posts: 360
2/16/08 4:19 P

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Just wondering does your family support the healthy eating you are trying? If they do, how? If they don't how do you handle it?
The reason I ask is my husband supports me by cooking healthy meals that I ask for. But when we eat he always wants me to eat more. Any body else have this issue?

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