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FUNLOVEN's Photo FUNLOVEN Posts: 2,654
6/25/19 10:28 A

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DAY #74 IT'S NOT MY FAULT - ROUND 2

"Wouldn't it be nice if being overweight wasn't really your fault?" OMG, what a dream come true that might be! Honestly, though, when it comes to being overweight I have NO ONE TO BLAME BUT ME!

I can get caught up in eating food to please others such as a private dinner party. And, I have to say, it is difficult to turn any efforts or offerings from my 92 year old dad down when he is trying so hard to do something nice, thoughtful, and loving (in his mind). On a whole, though, I really don't have any "Food Pushers" in my life except for myself.

Yes, it is my fault. No one really twists my arm, forces my mouth open, or shoves food down my throat. The choices are all mine.

I already have an arsenal of gracious refusals I can give people for foods not on my plan. What I need to put my focus on is a plan for bolstering my resistance muscles when I'm face to face with temptations and strong urges/cravings for items that are NMF!

Sue

Michigan - EST

LIVE-BREATHE-ENJOY LIFE!
"Live life to its fullest and make the most of every day."


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OHANAMAMA's Photo OHANAMAMA Posts: 28,099
6/19/19 10:00 A

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Day 74 Itís not my fault

Take charge of your own life, including your eating and exercise. No one is going to make you follow a healthy eating or exercise plan, so itís up to you to manage these areas of life.

Today

ē Describe a situation where you might eat because itís expected.
When my husband or children cook or buy something specifically for my family or me.
Pot lucks, other family gatherings.

ē Consider ways you give up your power to please others. Write about this.
I do not know. I have said no thank you before to my kids and it wasn't worth the disappointment I saw in their faces.
As far as pot lucks and such go, I have no problems not having anything.

ē Create a plan for managing this situation better in the future.
I handle the pot luck and family gathering situations fine.

~ Renee ~

Turn your magic on.


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JUNEPA's Photo JUNEPA Posts: 14,415
6/17/19 10:23 P

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Day 74 Itís not my fault

Take charge of your own life, including your eating and exercise. No one is going to make you follow a healthy eating or exercise plan, so itís up to you to manage these areas of life.

Today

ē Describe a situation where you might eat because itís expected.
ē Consider ways you give up your power to please others. Write about this.
ē Create a plan for managing this situation better in the future.


ē Describe a situation where you might eat because itís expected.

When I am a guest and the host home-makes something delicious that takes more than average time and skill to make.

ē Consider ways you give up your power to please others. Write about this.

When there is a birthday, I don't want to say no to cake. In actual fact, it seems now-a-days, there will be a few others who say no, so I wouldn't be the only one. It would definitely be hard to say no if I was the only one and the cake was home-made.


ē Create a plan for managing this situation better in the future.

I think it is okay to have a moderate piece of cake, to eat moderately. If I know I will be having a more bountiful meal, and I don't want to overeat because the food will be delicious, my plan would be to eat moderately at the meal, and have something to eat just before I go, and drink a few glasses of water as well to help me not be ravenous, and try to stay within daily calorie cap. And if I don't stay under calorie cap, I won't reduce calories the next day, I will eat on plan like a regular day, so I don't start a rollercoaster.


June -- Pacific Time Zone
Where you end up is more important than how fast or where you start out.
- Improved fitness and nutrition, energy and confidence are my rewards.
It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
A PH (personal high) is the main goal, a PB is the sometime icing on the cake.
Never underestimate the inevitability of gradualness.
Sopra le nebbie delle valle e le vicende della vita sorge una promessa di luce e serenita.


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YOUNG-AT-HEART's Photo YOUNG-AT-HEART Posts: 1,803
6/15/19 12:06 P

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emoticon DAY #74 emoticon

Day 74 - Itís not my fault





Take charge of your own life, including your eating and exercise. No one is going to make you follow a healthy eating or exercise plan, so itís up to you to manage these areas of life.

Today

ē Describe a situation where you might eat because itís expected.
ē Consider ways you give up your power to please others. Write about this.
ē Create a plan for managing this situation better in the future.

My problem isnít with others and their expectations of my healthy eating and exercise program and pleasing them. I live alone, I am very independent, and I take responsibility and donít blame others for what I eat. I wrote about this on ďDay 57 - People make me eatĒ and talked about ďfood pushersĒ. My struggle is with myself and the part of me that seems to take off on auto-pilot and gets me off track with my healthy eating and exercise plan.

So, bottom line, whatever food I put in my mouth is my responsibility.






~~~MARILYN ~~~
Virginia - Eastern Time Zone
The worst thing to be without--hope.
The most effective sleeping pill--peace of mind.
The main reason my past diets failed--lack of motivation.
The greatest "shot in the arm"-- encouragement.


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SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,242
6/14/19 3:58 A

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Great posts!

Phyllis - well done with staying firm with the fudge-eating friend. Sometimes we do have to be really firm - your "Don't you dare!" is a great one. I sometimes I say things like "Not today!" or "No, I really don't want to eat that today" My best friends know I try not to eat sugar and snacks on week-days - it's made life a lot easier for me!

Marie - keep going with your food-pusher - my experience has been that where I've been consistently firm with my food choices, other people have started following my example.

Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
s.asp




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PAULALALALA's Photo PAULALALALA Posts: 27,146
6/13/19 2:54 P

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emoticon
Social situations are the main time when I might be expected to eat something not on my plan. When someone has made the effort to provide a spread, I feel like I need to reward their efforts with enjoyment and compliments. I don't currently have any regular food pushers--it was more of an issue when my mom (and MIL) were still alive and regularly hosting the family.

I have used a number of evasions in social occasions to politely decline whatever is being enthusiastically promoted. I've said that I just brushed my teeth and the minty taste would not be good with whatever is being offered -- Same excuse with chewing gum -- or breath mint. "I'll wait for the taste to go away, then try some" One that really works (if I'm being pressed) is saying that my doctor is monitoring my blood work and wants me to cut way back on sugar and saturated fats...and I've got an appointment coming up that I'm trying to be good for. Actually the "doctor's orders" excuse is a slight fabrication, but is quite effective -- carries much more weight than just saying "I'm trying to eat healthy".

All that said -- there are times when I really DO want to sample a dessert or rich festive offering...but *I* want to be the one that makes that decision. emoticon emoticon

Paula -- Waco, TX area
CST zone

SP 4 Cornerstones
www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
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MAWMAW101's Photo MAWMAW101 Posts: 12,608
6/13/19 11:46 A

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Day #74 Itís not my fault emoticon
Below is my answer from the last time and itís amazing how things work out.
I just returned from a wonderful trip to Mackinac Island where fudge and food are everywhere.
I did have some very good fudge, brought none home with me, and am happy for the experience. There are beautiful waterfalls, great places to walk and I can now cross zip lining off my bucket list!

emoticon From last August!
I donít think I often blame others for my lack of sticking to my healthy eating plan but I am well aware of the close people in my life who make it difficult to stick to the plan.

This week was a lesson in sticking to my word as a friend who was sure I needed a pound of fudge from her vacation spot started reading off a very long list of options.
After saying ďnoĒ many times to each flavor I finally ended with ďdonít you dare!Ē

Truthfully I love fudge, I want fudge in my life, however I want good health more!
Maybe when I visit that vacation spot Iíll sample the fudge after I walk all over the island!


Phyllis ~~
Indiana - Eastern Time

20/20 Vision- What we focus on expands. ďNever give up on the dream!Ē


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ROADTOFREEDOM's Photo ROADTOFREEDOM Posts: 1,830
6/13/19 11:33 A

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A timely reminder.

There is someone close to me who tempts me with foods that I shouldn't eat. This person shouldn't eat those foods either. But, they want to eat them and they want me to be a partner in the eating. It's a bit like a drinker not wanting to drink alone.

What I eat really is my responsibility and I need to own my choices. No doubt about it.

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SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,242
6/13/19 8:23 A

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I remember recently reading something on Spark about pacing the drinks by having a sparkling water type drink between each alcoholic drink. You can then hang onto the sparkling water for as long as possible!

Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
s.asp




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DSJB9999's Photo DSJB9999 Posts: 6,695
6/13/19 4:20 A

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100 More DWL , Day 74 Itís not my fault

Take charge of your own life, including your eating and exercise. No one is going to make you follow a healthy eating or exercise plan, so itís up to you to manage these areas of life.

ē Describe a situation where you might eat because itís expected.

When we go to good friends house for a drink it is expected we will partake of the treats as well as the alcohol.
Also when people come to our house you get extra in for them (and us)

ē Consider ways you give up your power to please others. Write about this.

I try to prepare a filling meal before going to their house, unless of course they are planning to feed us, for me I try not to eat 'before the event as I have a bad habit of doing so! I also will take some diet coke with me if I can do so.

ē Create a plan for managing this situation better in the future.

I need to do my best to avoid the peanuts and other treats, sit away from them if I can!
Maria I agree the alcohol can be hard to 'avoid' sometimes at other peoples house but I like the idea of the iced water and will try that next time they come here.

Donna
Lancashire, UK

dsjb99@yahoo.co.uk

don't have a facebook account
SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,242
6/13/19 4:09 A

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I'm sharing this one again - which I found on a Spark Friend's blog a while back - it's so good. And seems to be what I need at the moment. No-one can make me eat something I don't want to eat.



Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
s.asp




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CAROLYNINJOY1's Photo CAROLYNINJOY1 Posts: 12,173
9/18/18 4:10 A

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100 More DWL , Day 74 Itís not my fault

Take charge of your own life, including your eating and exercise. No one is going to make you follow a healthy eating or exercise plan, so itís up to you to manage these areas of life.

Today

ē Describe a situation where you might eat because itís expected.
ē Consider ways you give up your power to please others. Write about this.
ē Create a plan for managing this situation better in the future.

I have taken charge of my own life. I feel frustrated some times because my body will not allow me to do certain exercises. I make whatever modifications I can and move forward. I've had tendonitis in both forearms and wrists which has stopped me from working out with light weights. That is disappointing and I hope to be able to do it again soon.. It's been a month and the doctor says continue to rest, ice and wrap them. I started taking an herb supplement that I hope will help.

As far as eating, I've consistently used the SparkPeople nutritional planner since November 2017 and have removed 44 pounds. I'm hoping to have a great remaining 10 weeks to make my one year anniversary of eating clean.

I don't eat when someone else expects me to so I don't give up my power just to please others. If this comes up, I will then devise a plan.


Joy is a Choice. Choose joy moment by moment.

When all else fails, persistence prevails.

Injoy:) Carolyn

(Arizona - Mountain Standard Time)

My personal story as a blog:
https://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_p
ublic_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=6
476843


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FUNLOVEN's Photo FUNLOVEN Posts: 2,654
9/1/18 9:47 P

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Day #74 It's Not My Fault


This is an easy one for me. I think I might even be an expert! My DH is my target. I have said it many times in my posts. He is the one that always wants to go for drinks. He is the one that always wants another beer as we relax in our beautiful back yard on our new patio. He is the one that always picks restaurants that don't have any healthy options (other than another salad). He is the one who always needs a 10 p.m. snack while we watch T.V. See how easily I have clicked those examples off?! Of course it is his fault. You don't expect me to take the blame or responsibility for my poor eating behaviors, do you?!

Well, yes I do need to take the responsibility!

We are on vacation and my eating has been less than exemplary. However, today I had a chance to straighten myself out a bit. DH ate something last night (i think it was the raw oysters) that caused him to be terrible sick. Today there was improvement, but the entire day was a struggle for him. He had no appetite for any food or liquids. I took advantage of this opportunity and did a self-imposed fast for the day. A good body flush with lots of water! Then for dinner tonight I had a Steak Salad with a couple glasses of wine. When we got back to the hotel I did finish the few pieces of Salt Water Taffy left over from yesterday.

I feel like I'm back in the driver's seat. I do not need to let him or others influence my choices. I can simply say "No thank you. I don't feel like eating/drinking - - - right now. Maybe later" !

Sue

Michigan - EST

LIVE-BREATHE-ENJOY LIFE!
"Live life to its fullest and make the most of every day."


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MADAMEJEANNE's Photo MADAMEJEANNE SparkPoints: (80,157)
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8/30/18 5:12 P

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Describe a situation when you are tempted to overeat.

Church potlucks. I start out by bringing something healthy and eating something before hand.
But people will talk about something and I love sweets so I am tempted and give in

Solution: plan just to eat what I bring and plain fruit or plain vegetables. Donít even go to the dessert table. Drink water

Matthew 11:28 Come unto me all ye that are heavy laden and I will give you rest unto your soul.


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GOCALGAL's Photo GOCALGAL Posts: 5,176
8/30/18 4:49 P

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ē Describe a situation where you might eat because itís expected.

At get together celebrations with friends and family especially alcohol which seems to magically reappear in my glass and dessert that is sometimes handed to me without asking if I want it.

ē Consider ways you give up your power to please others. Write about how you can manage this.
I have made some progress here by smiling and saying I'm too full or I'll have some later when it is dessert time. Recently I just let the second Margarita get watery and did not drink it. Haven't cruised with girlfriends forever but when I did, I saved calories and overeating by giving any alcohol to whoever sat next to me. With the high cost of alcohol on a cruise ship I never sat alone. lol

ē Create a plan for managing this situation better in the future.

I'm thinking I should put ice water in my empty glass next time to avoid waste and temptation. Also rather than argue I should work harder to throw away immediately into the trash any high caloric leftovers that I am sent home with or that are left at my home. The last cake leftovers never made it to the morning not to mention the leftover frosting. emoticon Two birthday celebrations are coming up. I'm hosting one and making both cakes.
From a previous lesson I made a sign prominently placed, "The frosting challenge" to see if I can do a whole lot better this time. emoticon


Maria ~ So. Cal. ~ Pacific Time Zone
Smile, hug, encourage others

"It's not the mountain we conquer,
But ourselves." unknown

Winning is Not Quitting

OHANAMAMA's Photo OHANAMAMA Posts: 28,099
8/30/18 10:34 A

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Today

ē Describe a situation where you might eat because itís expected.
pot lucks, showers, wedding receptions, family gatherings, trying someone's recipe
ē Consider ways you give up your power to please others. Write about this.
I used to not want to disappoint anyone, hurt anyone's feelings or be the weird one but...
ē Create a plan for managing this situation better in the future.
now I choose to not hurt my health or disappoint myself with poor choices and I embrace my weirdness! I will skip the food if there are no good choices with polite no thank you's and maybe later's.

~ Renee ~

Turn your magic on.


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SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,242
8/30/18 8:17 A

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Wow, Gloria - you did SO well to be brave enough to say that to your friend!

ē Describe a situation where you might eat because itís expected.

Well, I really recognised those phrases Linda quoted: "I made this specially for you" etc or "oh, go on, it won't hurt" etc etc.

I am OK when I'm the hostess - people can do what they like, but so will I. However, in October I am going to spend a long weekend with my brother and sister-in-law. They know I am a vegan/vegetarian, but I'm pretty sure they will have cake, desserts, snacks around.

ē Consider ways you give up your power to please others. Write about this.

I am definitely able to just give up trying and go along with it so that I don't seem a nuisance, or fussy! When I anticipate being their guest, I know that I will eat at the same time as them, and that they might see my visit as a chance to have 'treats' with food, and drink. There won't be a crowd of people for me to hide in - I'll be there with them in their home. They don't eat too badly - but they do like treats - and foods that are triggers for me (bread, cheese, biscuits, cakes, crisps, pizza, chocolates)

ē Create a plan for managing this situation better in the future.

I have figured that there are 7 meals to navigate (I've disregarded breakfast as it's more accepted to make your own choices at that meal). However, I am quite worried about how I'll manage! I know that if I give in once, I'll be a goner!

(1) maybe I could let them know beforehand that I'm trying to stay off sugar
(2) take sugar-free raw bars with me to share (dates and nuts) - I've found some great ones in Lidl that have a lovely texture - really satisfying.
(3) portion control! if necessary, have a little of everything and stick to 'one plate' amounts
(4) try not to eat too much too late in the day

I will also make a robust nutritional plan for my journey there and back - and a plan for a re-set when I get home! A big bowl of soup!

Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
s.asp




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GLORIAZ's Photo GLORIAZ Posts: 1,326
8/30/18 7:45 A

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I guess it would be easy to blame others for our weaknesses, but that really wouldnít be fair.
I donít think we want to open that door........where would it stop.
I remember the line ďthe devil made me do itĒ. Well I guess people can tempt us, but we have the final say and choice.
A friend of mine visited and knew that I was watching my carbs. She found a new Italian restaurant that made the best lasagna and home made bread, and wanted to make a reservation for us. I told her Iíll consider that restaurant at another time. I was happy with myself that I was able to say that, but boy that was so tempting.
Hereís to all of us overcoming our temptations, one step at a time! emoticon


One day at a time!


Gloria.
EST Pennsylvania
2017 Spring 5% Challenge Tiger Monarchs
Biggest Loser Summer Challenge Golden Phoenix
Biggest Loser Fall Challenge Golden Phoenix 2017


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MAWMAW101's Photo MAWMAW101 Posts: 12,608
8/30/18 6:52 A

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Day #74 Itís not my fault

I donít think I often blame others for my lack of sticking to my healthy eating plan but I am well aware of the close people in my life who make it difficult to stick to the plan.
emoticon This week was a lesson in sticking to my word as a friend who was sure I needed a pound of fudge from her vacation spot started reading off a very long list of options.
After saying ďnoĒ many times to each flavor I finally ended with ďdonít you dare!Ē
emoticon Truthfully I love fudge, I want fudge in my life, however I want good health more!
Maybe when I visit that vacation spot Iíll sample the fudge after I walk all over the island!

Phyllis ~~
Indiana - Eastern Time

20/20 Vision- What we focus on expands. ďNever give up on the dream!Ē


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CAT125's Photo CAT125 Posts: 28,602
8/30/18 6:02 A

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Day 74 Itís not my fault







Cat, in Florida
Eastern Time Zone


Pounds lost in 2020......


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AURA18's Photo AURA18 Posts: 11,090
8/26/18 3:05 P

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Edited by: AURA18 at: 8/27/2018 (05:50)
Maribeth MN CT Black Panthers draxe.com/ dance u.nu/ixjy planks u.nu/9w-u hands u.nu/httpsunu7lag
bit.ly/BLC41
AURA18's Photo AURA18 Posts: 11,090
8/26/18 1:50 P

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Day 74 "Itís not my fault - Take charge of my own life, including eating and exercise. No one is going to make you follow my plan, so I manage these areas of life." Thankfully this has been resolved - my husband and I eat & exercise according to our metabolic needs. emoticon eat when hungry emoticon satisfied. Keep moving all day long till I hit the hay at 9 pm.
Reminder of our old family farm
Just for cat lovers emoticon emoticon
Spark some---walk more. emoticon emoticon

Edited by: AURA18 at: 12/14/2018 (17:11)
Maribeth MN CT Black Panthers draxe.com/ dance u.nu/ixjy planks u.nu/9w-u hands u.nu/httpsunu7lag
bit.ly/BLC41
CD13384562 Posts: 7,356
5/8/18 10:12 P

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Day 74 Itís not my fault

Take charge of your own life, including your eating and exercise. No one is going to make you follow a healthy eating or exercise plan, so itís up to you to manage these areas of life.

Today

ē Describe a situation where you might eat because itís expected.
ē Consider ways you give up your power to please others. Write about this.
ē Create a plan for managing this situation better in the future.

Link to Day 73 www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/
team_messa
geboard_thread.asp?board=200
58x211
94x69021118


Link to Day 75
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/
team_messa
geboard_thread.asp?board=200
58x211
94x69021123


Edited by: CD13384562 at: 5/19/2018 (16:55)
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