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CJBAGGINS's Photo CJBAGGINS Posts: 33,383
9/3/14 12:49 A

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Another one to try.

cj

What if we woke up tomorrow with only those things that we thanked God for today?


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LIKINMENOW's Photo LIKINMENOW Posts: 51,476
9/1/14 7:26 A

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BONDING AS A COUPLE - SHARING FEELINGS
By Susan Vogt

One way that couples develop closeness is to share their feelings (not just their opinions and plans but also their emotions) with each other. Often sharing on this level comes more easily to one spouse than the other. Following is a way to get in touch with what each other really cares about and what joys and burdens your spouse is carrying. It doesn’t require much time (maybe 10-15 minutes). The only supplies needed are a small piece of paper and pencil. You can do it almost anywhere. Here’s how it works:

1. Each spouse writes down 5-10 current or recent feelings they’ve had (in the last 24 hours). For example:
• “Relieved” (that I met my deadline at work)
• “Worried” (because one of our children had a bad day at school)
• “Pleased” (that you agreed to do this sharing time with me)
• “Frustrated” (because I couldn’t get rid of a computer virus today)
• “Weary” (of picking up after everyone in the house)
• “Joyous” (looking forward to a free weekend)
2. One partner starts by sharing a feeling and what prompted it. Be brief. This is not a time for discussion.
3. Alternate. The other partner picks a feeling to share and why until both are finished.

Caution: This is not a time for discussion or solving problems, but rather simply listening and trying to understand what’s going on inside your spouse. If couples try to problem solve or get into extensive discussion about negative feelings, it can inhibit you from returning frequently to this practice. It is meant as a quick check in. Certainly if this exercise brings up an issue that needs further discussion, plan a separate time to address the issue.
Some couples do this daily. Weekly is nice. Some just do it when they’ve been feeling distant or disconnected. This is a no guilt plan to deepen your love.

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