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MANIERICHARDS's Photo MANIERICHARDS Posts: 33,846
5/29/19 11:21 A

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Thanks, this morning my allergies were really bad blocking my ear and causing a dizziness.
Put in Refresh in eyes, but there goes grocery shopping for today. Don't dare go anywhere when I am like this.

Hoping Friday is a good day so can go out to eat and celebrate. Hit it at noon. Another year, no fun getting older, but such is life.

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5/29/19 10:21 A

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Happy Early Birthday!



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5/28/19 2:07 P

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I don't think I will start a career at 86, which I hit Friday. So to me it is a hobby. It wasn't a hobby when I was younger because I had to go out and interview people and then come back and write it up, with quotes. Then I was writing my first book that got published at 40. I was on cable tv and they made a tape for me, which I still have. I also was on radio programs and book signings, but I don't want to have to push myself now. I just want it to be fun. But if you do want a career then that is what you have to do. Not my cup of tea at this stage of life. I get tired with all the stuff I have to do in the house and there are days I don't even work on my novel. So it is a slow process for me.

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5/28/19 10:22 A

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I disagree. Make it a job.

If you want to have a sustainable career as an author, you HAVE to make it a job. Writing when you feel like it or when your muse strikes isn't going to help you. Train yourself to write every day.



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MANIERICHARDS's Photo MANIERICHARDS Posts: 33,846
5/27/19 2:52 P

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Don't give up. A lot of writers did not get their first book published right away. The ones who do are famous. Notice on the news you see authors you know who say the news writing books and selling them on the cable news or cable program talk shows.

You are not famous so you have to write a good book a publisher thinks will sell. Have fun writing it. Don't make it a job.

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5/15/19 2:08 P

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She is on the plane with her son. The war is still on as he is in a cell in Germany and can not meet her. She does not know this. While her son is sleeping she is thinking back to how she met Tom. When the plane lands, she drives to the tower and waits for him. When he does not show up she goes to her old apartment and asks the landlord if anyone left a message for her. After few days she flies home. The war ends and he is set free and goes to the hospital to recover.
When he is able to be on his own he goes to Paris to find her and asks her landlord if she came back. He finds she did but no one knows where she is now. He never got an address from her, nor did she give him one. He was only a soldier on a two week leave so there was no need for that.

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5/15/19 9:54 A

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Is she on the plane with her son after the war?



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5/13/19 2:32 P

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No, it is flashback only for about three pages of them. Then it goes into Tom being captured in Germany and in a cell.

Then about Mary's son growing up to be a man. Then Dennis's mother dying of pneumonia and how he meets his father at the cemetery and does not know it is his father. They become friends and he goes over for lunch.

Then there is a part where he meets his half sister in college as she is taken a course and he is a professor in one of her classes. Then his half sister fixes him up with her friend and they get married.

The second book will be when the half sister gets serious with the guy she was going with that caught the garter and put it on her leg.





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5/13/19 10:21 A

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So your whole story is a flashback?

Is that necessary?



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5/10/19 1:39 P

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So the story can not jump from one subject to another without an explanation.

In my story, she is on the plane with here son going to meet Tom,in Paris, her soldier coming back from the war. I have her, once her son is asleep on the plane, resting and thinking about how she met Tom. Then I start the story. Once the story has ended where he has to go overseas then I come back to her on the plane wakened by her son and she comes back to reality and the son asks when the plane will be coming to Paris.

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5/10/19 10:00 A

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By jarring, I mean an abrupt change.

You can use words to show time passed - the next morning, a few hour later.

Also ask yourself if it's really needed, and delete it if it's not.



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5/8/19 2:47 P

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What is jarring? I never heard of that before.

If it is too small for a chapter how else would you do it?

Edited by: MANIERICHARDS at: 5/8/2019 (14:48)
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5/8/19 11:34 A

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Well, if that's your style, that's fine. Just make sure it's not jarring.



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MANIERICHARDS's Photo MANIERICHARDS Posts: 33,846
5/6/19 1:43 P

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I figured that out. Thanks.. I use it when the character is talking to one person and then there is a short paragraph about someone else, not enough for a chapter. Is that ok?

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5/6/19 10:47 A

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usually *** designates a scene break and point-of-view change. I usually have two POVs per chapter, and there's a *** between them.



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MANIERICHARDS's Photo MANIERICHARDS Posts: 33,846
5/2/19 8:29 A

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Abby, in reading a novel, I noticed ***** and someone else is talking. Is this just if there is going to be a short paragraph inserted when another person is being talked about. A paragraph which is not enough for a chapter? I have never used it but went on to a new chapter with the next person and made it long enough for a chapter.

I have been working on editing and doing what you told me and have a lot of talking and feelings in it. When she is eating at the cafe I talk about how the food tasted, so got the message.
Thanks...

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5/1/19 10:02 P

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In the interest of fairness - the first paragraphs of Cupcake of the Month.

“Why do I suspect that a game called Cupcake of the Month has nothing to do with baked goods?” Jordan accepted a glass of white wine from the mustard yellow-tuxedoed server and ignored the text vibrating her clutch on the table in front of her.

Lana let out a laugh that twinkled like her shimmering gold gown. The dress set off her brown skin, and her black hair cascaded in waves over her bared shoulders. “It’s so popular I’m surprised you haven’t yet noticed. This is what you do. Mark the server as yours. Drop hints, flirt, smile. And when you get him…”

“You take home a…” Jordan gestured to the waitstaff. “Cupcake?” She would rather have the literal dessert.




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4/27/19 8:07 A

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So what what I am gathering you want more show then tell. Ok, I get the point. thanks.
I will go and work on it.

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4/26/19 10:04 A

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So here's my thoughts.

She's at the tower, but we have no idea who she is. Teen mom? A woman with a late-in-life child? As for the tower, are we talking Empire State building or a some small-town water tower? Is it cold outside? Is she sweating? Was she waiting five minutes, or had she already been there for two hours?

You don't have to tell us she heard her son ask the question. He can just ask the question.
There's also a point-of-view switch when the son sees his mom's tears. She can just have the tears appear.

So, some of my suggestions put into play:


Joan's child grew heavy in her arms and she put him down with a sigh. Mike said he'd be there. Five hours ago.

"Mommy." Billy tugged at her skirt, which caught the fall breeze and nearly covered him. "Isn't daddy coming?"

She took a moment to blink back the tears before kneeling down. "No, baby. I'm afraid not."

Billy gave her solemn nod and put is little hands on her cheeks. "I'll find a daddy for you."

HIs earnestness made her smile and she wrapped her arms around his little body. "I know you will, baby."







Edited by: ABBYSHARPE at: 4/26/2019 (10:04)

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MANIERICHARDS's Photo MANIERICHARDS Posts: 33,846
4/24/19 3:15 P

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Yes, that is the beginning. I thought it had a hook. I was told by some publishers that they liked the beginning lines as it got them interested, but I guess not enough. I may have to just go back and edit out some stuff. Maybe I should just stick to the son, his mother and father and the daughter and not have him take his half sister to meet his father. Right now I have her father leaving home after the mother died with cancer and she does not know where he is. Then when her half brother takes her to meet his father and they go to his mother's grave and then his father;s wife grave she finally asks how he knew her mother and finds out he is her father. He had changed in the years with white hair, old looking, glasses and a cane.

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4/24/19 10:05 A

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Mani, is that the beginning? Do you want my take on it?



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4/23/19 10:50 A

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Wish you were my publisher.

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4/23/19 5:42 A

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Your writing puts me right into the scene. I love it!



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MANIERICHARDS's Photo MANIERICHARDS Posts: 33,846
4/22/19 2:00 P

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Abby, they never asked for the first page. They just asked for the story line and and a few paragraphs on the middle and end. Also what the story was about.

So how can they tell.

She waited at the tower with his child but he never appeared. She heard her son ask, "Mommy isn't daddy coming?"
She looked at her son, put her arms around his little body and said, "I am afraid not."
Her son saw the tears appear in his mothers eyes and tried to wipe them with his hands, as he said, "Mommy don't cry. When I grow up I will find daddy for you."
She felt the tears trying to come again as she kissed her son and said, "I know you will."


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4/22/19 9:58 A

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If you want to be brave, post the first ten pages somewhere here. :)

Publishers and agents can tell from the first page if its something they want to work with. That's why the first page is SO SO SO important.



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MANIERICHARDS's Photo MANIERICHARDS Posts: 33,846
4/20/19 1:57 P

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Well, I never saw any mark on it saying that.

I got a message back from a publisher saying I had very little prose and it was silted and jarring.
I don't even know what those mean. I forgot a lot in my day. Could you explain?

They did not ask for the whole story only what the story was about and two chapters. How can you tell anything with that little?

So looks like I have to work on it before sending out again.

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4/19/19 1:56 P

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So the publisher does have the right to do that.
Most times they'll clearly mark that a book has been republished or has a new name or cover.



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MANIERICHARDS's Photo MANIERICHARDS Posts: 33,846
4/17/19 4:08 P

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I have noticed in a book from Debbie McComber there was a story I read a while back in the book with another author but the cover was different from the first one I had. This is how I end up buying a book I have read. I think they change the cover and put a story in that was a few years back. But I have also seen reprints of books I read come out again.

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4/17/19 10:04 A

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... I'm not sure what you mean...?



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4/15/19 2:13 P

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Yes, it does give the first publication from one publishing co and then from another on another year. So I figure the publisher must contact the author. Usually, there is one book with one story and the second story after it that I have read.

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4/15/19 10:24 A

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Publishers don't own the rights to be able to do that, so I'm not sure what you're talking about. Sometimes they may rename and recover a book, but it will usually state somewhere that it was previously released.



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4/12/19 2:01 P

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I never cared for Novellas. I usually like writing the novel better.

I have seen publishers take out dated books and find another writer and add the outdated one to it and put it out. Sometimes, I get a book and think I didn't read it and find the first story is new and the second I read years ago. Have you noticed?

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4/12/19 10:46 A

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50,000 is considered a novel, I think. Novellas as 20K-50k words, and short stories are under 20K.

The trouble with books in the library is they're outdated the minute they are published. Online is your best bet.



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4/11/19 11:09 A

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Once your story is completed and you have at least 50,000 words for a short story then start to send it to a publisher. You can find them in the library under a book for publishers. Or on the internet. But....Watch what you are sending too. Make sure no money is involved except in one case could be to buy copies for yourself. Usually, a publisher will give you royalties and pay for the work to be done. Don't expect a lot of money. Publisher takes the big cut as they pay the cost in most cases and you may get a small royalty for each book that sells.

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