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HOPEFULHIPPO's Photo HOPEFULHIPPO Posts: 7,159
11/6/14 4:14 P

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You really ARE feisty!

I LIKE it!!!



Corinna
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11/6/14 11:49 A

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I've been a vegetarian for over 9 years now. Not vegan, for many reasons, but vegetarian. I allowed skepticism from family for about the first year, but after that, I responded firmly. I believe if you invite someone to dinner, you should always provide an entree corresponding to their dietary needs, or at least several hearty sides. If they don't do that, I decline the next invitation and if they ask why, I tell them why in black and white terms. If someone thinks it's funny to make jokes, I tell them in no uncertain terms that they're being rude, and point out that I don't criticize their plate or diet, so they should stop looking at mine. I'm not a passive person, but I'm not confrontational. If pushed, I'll point to the links between North America's over consumption of meat and obesity, heart disease, etc. I also don't think eating meat is immoral or inherently bad- if people obtain their meat from local small farmers, do their own hunting/fishing, and/or eat sustainable fish sources, all of the power to them- they're doing their part too, just in a different way. I think sometimes, we veggie folks can be pretty excited about our diets, from the changes in our body, to the new flavors we end up trying, to the way we feel about making a difference every day. But it's best not to push it on people. If they come to you, they do, if they don't, they don't.

The advice I have to you about your husband is to tell him that his comments and "jokes" hurt you, because you're trying to live a healthy life for your family and you are passionate about what you're doing. Ask for his support, tell him if his family has hurt you too, and thank him when he's considerate and kind about your choices. He'll come around. They always do.

Cheers!


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PLIBBY9's Photo PLIBBY9 SparkPoints: (19,488)
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10/24/14 8:23 P

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Thank you all so much for your thoughtful and helpful responses!

It does seem like the best path is to mostly keep quiet, and to be patient.

I know I have been a positive influence on some of my family members already. As you called it, they still think meat is supposed to be a part of every meal. When I make a meal for them they tend to supplement my food with processed cheese, bread, and meat. At least they are getting a lot more nutrients with the plant-based foods, and they're paying more attention to the ingredients in their processed food. It's a start. I will simply be a good role model.

I will also lightly encourage my husband to read the China study; he already said he is open to changing his diet slowly. Again I just have to be patient and not do any hassling. Great advice… I really appreciate it.

It's difficult to stay quiet about this way of eating because it is so AWESOME. And yes, I do get a little pissed off when people eat meat... Usually without any care at all. At least you wonderful people understand. ;) Hooray for each of us being "one less" meat eater!


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HOPEFULHIPPO's Photo HOPEFULHIPPO Posts: 7,159
10/24/14 12:00 P

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I have to agree with ds0kie. "As far as seeing people eat the meat...I know its hard but you just have grin and bear it cause if you don't want them to hassle you then we can't hassle them (I know you feel like telling them off sometimes)"

I live with an omnivore family and I've been vegan/vegetarian for nearly....three years now? In any case, it's been a bit. My family has finally come to the conclusion not to hassle me (EHEM hubby) My girls have always been supportive and even try a few things with me.

Hubby still makes "sawdust" comments when cooking my veggie burgers and stuff and I throw it back at him with his "antibiotic mammal flesh" (If he can give it, he can take it) LOL

My oldest has become vegan since moving out of the house on her own. I know after all my girls are gone my BBQing husband is still going to hunt and Q and hassle me with my plants. But I don't care, I mean I do, but not enough to let it worry me. If he thinks it's a fad, so be it.

You do what is right for YOU. That's what this journey is all about right? I can hope over time as my health gets better and maybe he tries a few recipes that hubs will lean more towards what I cook. Until then we just co-exist in that department and I happy to know that I make the "one less" meat eater in the family for the animals and environment. (and daughter now makes two)

Good luck :o)

Corinna
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DS9KIE's Photo DS9KIE SparkPoints: (550,060)
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10/24/14 8:28 A

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don't...(try to convince them)... waste of time...cause they are tooo busy convincing you that eating meat is the only way to eat..I know I know eating fruits and veggies is sooooo weird...(according to my mom we shouldn't eat oranges cause they are high in carbs, yet we are unhealthy if we don't eat eggs...she says salmon too but knows I wont eat them..I use to eat eggs...yuck)

You just need to convince them that this is the way you eat...Your not stopping them from eating what they want so stop changing the way you want to eat...you can also point out that your not eating weird food, that your eating real food...your just skipping the animal produces...

As far as seeing people eat the meat...I know its hard but you just have grin and bear it cause if you don't want them to hassle you then we can't hassle them (I know you feel like telling them off sometimes)

Edited by: DS9KIE at: 10/24/2014 (08:35)
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10/24/14 8:10 A

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I had the same problem. It's taken years - since 1989 - my late husband never did think it anything but a fad, but now people do accept my way of eating and I think that it's because of all the scientific evidence out there supporting a plant-strong lifestyle and the animal abuse. If your husband is a reader, The China Study by T. Colin Campbell was what made me go vegan seven years ago. Compelling, documented, reading.

Boni
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10/24/14 7:56 A

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I've read the many delicious sounding recipes you share with us here in SPland. Perhaps rather than talking, sharing the wonderful food you're cooking will not only convince your family but have them asking you to make their new-found plant-based dishes. Hang in there.

GO_VEGGIE's Photo GO_VEGGIE Posts: 482
10/24/14 7:29 A

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Good morning, Plibby!

It's unfortunate, but there are some 'vegans' out there who aren't in this lifestyle for the environment or ethics or even for a lifetime of good health. That's part of the reason why it's sometimes considered a fad. They don't have their heart in the right place. Some people use veganism as simply a 'diet' to help them lose weight and once the weight is lost they go back to their previous way of eating. Some people think it's trendy. Yes, it's hard for a new veg'n to understand this.

I don't have much advice to give you as I am a divorced empty-nester who lives with her precious furbaby cat. It's hard sometimes explaining your views to family members and not all of them will understand. Your right by saying it will take time. I don't know what you've said to your family thus far, but what I would do if the subject came up again is to continue to explain how veganism makes me feel instead of just giving factual data or whatnot. This way they should eventually realize you're not living this way on a whim or as a fad 'diet.'

I hope it gets better for you in time and your family will accept your new way of life.

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Edited by: GO_VEGGIE at: 10/24/2014 (07:43)
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PLIBBY9's Photo PLIBBY9 SparkPoints: (19,488)
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10/24/14 5:32 A

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I have been vegetarian for 5 months and vegan for 2 months.

I made exceptions at the beginning, but I gave them up over the first 2-3 months: fish, then eggs, then dairy. The only exception I made recently was ordering cheese enchiladas at a Mexican restaurant, which I won't do anymore. I have an excellent vegan enchilada recipe now. :)

So here I am after 5 months of starting my new eating lifestyle, and I am thrilled to call myself a vegan. It was a fairly quick journey to get here, and I know clearly that I will never eat meat again. Yet... My husband still considers the way I eat as a "fad" and that I will change my mind. He and other family members continue to talk about eating "healthy" or "yummy" meat, and they expect me to be happy for them.

For example: Yesterday my husband was going on about how much healthier he is eating now because he is eating less fried chicken, and more baked chicken. Just the idea of eating a chicken makes me sad, so it was challenging to be genuinely happy about what he is eating. Of course it's great that he's eating healthier, but I sure do wish he would take me seriously about how I feel about eating meat: it's cruel, unethical, harmful to our environment, and unhealthy.

I guess it's just a matter of time for my husband and family members to realize that this is not just a diet or a fad.




Edited by: PLIBBY9 at: 10/24/2014 (05:35)
Plibby

I love the food that loves me back... Hooray for plants!
My eating lifestyle:
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