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CRINS15's Photo CRINS15 Posts: 433
2/6/15 8:29 A

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That is so awesome to hear Be-Amazed!

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TIGGER622's Photo TIGGER622 Posts: 5,468
2/5/15 5:38 P

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I love your positive outlook!!! Keep that up and all things will fall into place!

Sooooo glad your son is doing so well!

Dani

"Slow is smooth, smooth is fast!"


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BE-AMAZING's Photo BE-AMAZING Posts: 698
2/4/15 10:57 A

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I really appreciate all the support. I really do want another child, and you are right, that there is a 75% chance the baby will be fine. I am going to keep on working on getting myself healthy and my hubby into shape too so that we can mix up a healthy batch of genes for this next baby.

My first son is really flourishing in daycare right now, and I believe that he will be alright. It makes me feel more optimistic about going for it again.



Start Weight Oct 2012: 212 lbs
2015 Restart Weight: 175 lbs
2016 Restart Weight: 155 lbs
Ultimate Goal: 135 lbs






 current weight: 158.7 
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KAYTEHD's Photo KAYTEHD SparkPoints: (4,037)
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2/1/15 9:31 A

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I know you said that there is a 25% chance of your second child being sick but I would look at it as a 75% chance your second child will be perfectly healthy.

I know the fear though. My first child was born still and I'm terrified that it will happen again or the next baby will be sick.

It's a big decision but if you and your husband are good partners and on the same page I feel like you can handle anything that comes your way.

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CRINS15's Photo CRINS15 Posts: 433
1/31/15 12:26 P

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I agree with everything that was already said here. Life throws all sorts of challenges and typically we all deal with them and get through it. It definitely sounds like you'd like to try... but I can see where you are coming from. It will probably be a lot of work but you've already said its worth it for your son. And you have more of a chance that it won't happen then it will. But truly you need to what is in your heart and only you and your husband can answer that one.

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TIGGER622's Photo TIGGER622 Posts: 5,468
1/31/15 12:19 P

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I love what was said about finding the strength for anything the world throws at us. That is so true. I am sure you felt overwhelmed and unsure that you could handle or manage your sins condition and it sounds like you are doing that a million times over! It also kinda sounds like you want to try again, if I read between the lines... Go with your heart, you are a wonderful mother and that will never be lacking for however many kids... Sending love!

Dani

"Slow is smooth, smooth is fast!"


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BE-AMAZING's Photo BE-AMAZING Posts: 698
1/30/15 10:45 P

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You are both so kind. Thanks.

Start Weight Oct 2012: 212 lbs
2015 Restart Weight: 175 lbs
2016 Restart Weight: 155 lbs
Ultimate Goal: 135 lbs






 current weight: 158.7 
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AMPROSKE1's Photo AMPROSKE1 SparkPoints: (65,348)
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1/30/15 12:54 P

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Wow I can not imagine being in your shoes. I think if you want to have another one for any reason you should go ahead and try. Somehow we are given the strength to deal with challenging situations, and I know that newborns are hard but we make it through. In my opinion, I would regret not trying to have another one once it gets to be too late. (That was how we made the decision to have try for another one now.)
That's just my opinion, but as Gwenn said, you should go with what you think you can handle. Only you know what you face on a daily basis.
I will be praying about your decision!

Angela


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QTLADY's Photo QTLADY SparkPoints: (100,818)
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1/30/15 9:38 A

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That is such a hard decision to make! What a wonderful mom you are to do so much for your son. I'm not sure I would have the strength to do that but I know we all do what we have to when faced with difficult decisions. I would do what is in your heart and what you know you can deal with. I know that sounds so cliche, but truthfully, it's what you think you and your husband can handle.

Gwenn


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BE-AMAZING's Photo BE-AMAZING Posts: 698
1/29/15 9:17 A

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We would really like to have another child, but I am really nervous about whether I can cope with another one.

My first son is sick (genetic condition that we didn't know we were carriers for, despite testing). It is difficult to manage his condition, and he takes a lot of time and extra care. He isn't as happy and doesn't have as much fun as a kid his age should (2yrs). It pains me to know that he is struggling. I often think that he would enjoy having a sibling, and I often worry that if we lose him, we will be left alone in the end. This is an over reaction on my part, but it is a fear that I cannot help feeling. He will need a liver transplant, and then he will be relatively fine, but need to deal with managing his transplant.

I love him with all of my being and would not take back my decision to have him. We knew he was going to be ill due to the amnio testing we had done. He is such a beautiful, bright, sweet boy, and he is my whole world.

However, I don't know if I could cope with two sick children. The odds are 25% that we would have another child with the same illness. I would do genetic testing, but I don't think I could choose to abort our child, even if it had the same condition. My son is so perfect, and he is smart and lovely. I cannot imagine our lives without him. I couldn't do it when I knew he was ill, so I doubt I could do it if I were faced with that decision again.

On a day-to-day basis, we are fine, but we have difficult nights and sometimes bad weeks. How could I give two children the attention and care they need, even if baby #2 were healthy?

I am afraid that I won't be able to manage. I am worried that I could cause pain to a second child. I am sad because I want more children.

What would you do?

Start Weight Oct 2012: 212 lbs
2015 Restart Weight: 175 lbs
2016 Restart Weight: 155 lbs
Ultimate Goal: 135 lbs






 current weight: 158.7 
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165
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