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DIDDSIE's Photo DIDDSIE Posts: 100
3/30/07 8:41 P

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She left. She went home for the weekend.

For all my bitchin' and moanin' and sleep deprivation and stress, I have to tell you... I am deriving a certain level of satification from this situation. My ex-roommate is SO UPSET and she has no capacity to deal with stress at all. That's why she called her mom to come talk to me. Knowing she's more miserable and with less of a handle on things that I have gets me through the day.

Yes. I'm a bitch. I only do right by people who do right by me.

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KMEMN1's Photo KMEMN1 Posts: 357
3/30/07 3:37 P

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Dude, is there a meetin you can sign up for tonight?
Sounds like the best thing for you right now would be to get out of the house and be with some other people

DIDDSIE's Photo DIDDSIE Posts: 100
3/30/07 3:34 P

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It definitely is anxiety and stress. I am in the midst of something of a roommate/apartment debacle that seems to get worse with every day that goes by.

I think going outside sounds like a really good idea. Even if I just sit in a lawn chair by the balcony door with the curtains wide open. I love the sun. It's kind of cold to be outside for any length of time though. I've never done yoga, but I should try. I'd like to try pilates as well.

I've been drinking tonnes of water. I've actually massively upped my water intake, though I don't really know why. it just sort of happened. My evenings are for the most part chillaxed, but with the tension between me and my roommate I can never just fully unwind. I get in the bathtub with a book and a bowl full of raspberries at night, but my mind is still working 80 miles an hour and I find myself annoyed by things like the medicine cabinet door being left open, and the shower knob thing being left pulled up so that it's gotten stuck and I have to go get a hammer so I can get it down and get my bath.

She does this effing annoying thing where she stands in a room close to where I am not doing anything, just waiting for me to talk to her. Yesterday when I told her I wasn't talking to her, she called her mom and had her mom come over and talk to me. YES, YOU READ THAT CORRECTLY. It's a long story but the short of it is I want nothing to do with her. I want her to stop hovering. I want her to stay away from me. I want her to stop being immature and lame. And I DON'T want to talk to her! I DEFINITELY don't want to be friends. I came home from work yesterday and she hid in the bathroom. I eventually felt sorry for her and went to my room so she would could get to hers (I was making dinner, that takes some time).

Because of her my rent is increasing by a minimum of 36% and there's a large possibility that I have to move. Apartment hunting in itself is stressing me out. Not knowing where I'll be in 2 months is stressing me out. The IDEA of moving is stressing me out.

And she lied to me. All this time we were living together she apparently had all these issues with me but never said anything, just complained about me behind my back until she came and told me she was moving out. Why in the hell would I want to talk to her?

THAT is why I have insomnia. How can I fix that?

sorry for the rant. Once I get going... oh boy.

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KMEMN1's Photo KMEMN1 Posts: 357
3/30/07 3:32 P

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Oh! That was directed at me!

Yeah...but I also need to build up the momentum to do the 30M.

DIDDSIE's Photo DIDDSIE Posts: 100
3/30/07 3:20 P

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Sure. You need your rest before you start your 30 k ;)

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THUNDERGIRL Posts: 307
3/30/07 3:12 P

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I am so sorry you're having a bad day and what sounds like a hard time with the not sleeping. I know insomnia just wrecks me up and I only get it one night here and there.

I am trying to think of things that might help you. It sounds like you need to relax and get a little less stressed. Is it nice out where you live? If its sunny can you get to a park this weekend? Walk around a little and then just lie on your back in the grass? Have a picnic outside? Being outside in the sun really helps me revive when I am feeling like crap. Or does your gym offer yoga? It really is a great stress reliever.

Are you well hydrated and drinking enough water? I'm not sure what to do for you on the sleeping front but what are your evenings like? Is it possible to clear out one evening and just make it a quiet night, come home, make and eat a leisurely dinner, turn the lights down, light some candles and relax in the tub with a book or magazine? Make the whole night about relaxation, get in bed early and just read or knit or whatever you find relaxing.

I'm really sorry you are feeling so miserable and I hope that you can find something that helps!





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KMEMN1's Photo KMEMN1 Posts: 357
3/30/07 3:08 P

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Have you tried melatonin?
That usually knocks me out in 15 minutes and I sleep well.


Do you have to be anywhere tomorrow? I'd drug up on cold meds and sleep all day.


And, does that mean I don't have to go to the gym tonight either? ;)

DIDDSIE's Photo DIDDSIE Posts: 100
3/30/07 3:05 P

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I am having a downer day. I got 2 hours of sleep due to insomnia. I ate fried food for lunch. My fat pants are an inch too small and super incomfortable. I'm about to go get a latte because I'm so tired and damn the calories. there's no way I can go to the gym feeling like this.

How can I possibly turn all these negatives into a positive attitude? I feel like a fat failure.

I have not been sleeping well. At most the past week I've gotten 4 hours of sleep. A lot of times it was less than that. I'm EXHAUSTED but I can't fall asleep. Once I do, I have to get up and go to work. I'm at my wits end. My eyes are bloodshot and I feel terrible.

I was given a lot of suggestions for natural insomnia remedies, which I'm going to try. I'm going to try ALL of them. The only thing I would immediately discount is anything involving milk, as I HATE milk. I'm not going to go to the doctors as all they could do for me is prescribe pills and pills that make me sleep (like advil flu medicine, for instance) make me wake up in haze and I am miserable and out of it all day. It's like I got NO sleep instead of a small amount of sleep.

So far on the list is

- catnip tea. Apparently catnip is a natural seditive for humans and they sell it at health food stores. I'm sure my cats will enjoy it if it doesn't work or is gross or something.

- passionfruit juice.

- peel an orange and make a tea out of the peel. orange peel tea? I'm not sure how you'd accomplish this though - finely grate it maybe?

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