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TRACY9103's Photo TRACY9103 SparkPoints: (33,380)
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11/8/15 6:37 P

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So far, I hate the feeling helpless to help my mother. She is a trooper, she is trying to take the bull by the horns. She is trying to follow all the rules from the doctor.

She even bought the book (What to eat during cancer treatment). We have all her snacks ready to go. Tomorrow we will make her little snack bags. I bought her a cooler for her room and the kids are scheduling time to go in and watch movies with her, so that's a plus.

Trying hard to not research to much. It is on the lower end of the lymphoma scales, but it's right under her right eye.

Now we know why she has been so tired, so not herself for the last few months. I think the not knowing has been the worst part. The doctor says she will be fine and chemo will hopefully be over in 6 months, be we have to wait to see how she reacts to the treatment.

Never give up, never surrender. You are important too.
Cloverleaf
50+ females
Dealing with Chronic Pain
Fitbit Users Unite!
Challenged by Arthirtis
Spine injuries and general back pain
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Tracy

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GRACE2BEME's Photo GRACE2BEME Posts: 212
7/8/15 2:07 P

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Diagnosed with "good" breast cancer in fall. Tumor removed, did radiation, and sentinel node biopsy 'looked good' but am told I need to take anti-cancer meds for a minimum of 5 years. Hate that the breast still hurts where surgery was done sometimes and the surgery site in arm pit is still sore and hard. I think some damage was done to a nerve that runs down my arm as it now hurts to spread fingers wide to try to play a cord on piano- no I don't play yet but had purchased a program to try to learn how to cord and was progressing some (all be it little and slowly). Also hurts when I am on computer a long time or at work... have to wear an arm sleeve to keep it from swelling... In the grand scheme of things these are very minor things... but still irritate me. I Praise God for the early diagnosis, and for sending me to the right doctors, I believe I have been healed but and complying with their directions. The weight loss program was not suggested by any of them but I believe I am supposed to pursue this goal actively and passionately until I am within goal weight. My prayers for all of you with cancer- any form- is to live the healthiest life you can live and to establish a personal relationship with God. He has more power and strength than anyone here today will have. When I am weak He is strong. Yes I am a Christian and for me He is my rock. I think my lifestyle (over-eating and inactivity) contributed to my getting breast cancer. While others in my family have had cancer (Grandfather- colo-rectal cancer; Grandmother- thyroid; other grandmother cancer took her life but I don't know what kind; Aunt breast cancer; my mother's sister-in-law so her cancer didn't increase my chances of developing it- and I believe a cousin had some form of cancer related to lungs but was too young to understand it all when it was discussed) I think my cancer is related to my choices. I believe God gives us the right to choose how we will live but not the option to escape consequences of our choices- since I am morbidly obese I believe I significantly contributed to likelihood of my contracting this form of cancer. Please do not get me wrong I am not saying lifestyle has anything to do with leukemia/ lymphoma or a child contracting the disease or even most forms of cancer. I do however believe that some forms of cancer are more likely to develop if one has a lifestyle that contributes to development of that particular form of cancer. (For examples smokers increase risk of lung cancer...National Cancer Institute says risk of cancers of Esophagus;Pancreas;Colon and rectum; Breast (after menopause); Endometrium (lining of the uterus); Kidney.Thyroid; & Gallbladder are higher in obese people). I had a hysterectomy because of a grapefruit size tumor in uterus that was fibroid noncancerous- but doctor didn't caution me to lose weight then to possibly prevent weight related cancers. Maybe the link was not shown then or maybe I wasn't obese enough then for him to think of telling me about additional risk of other cancers or maybe since he had removed the uterus and ovaries he felt I had no risks. Who knows---then I was not a practicing Christian and did it alone and it was really a lonely place to be in worrying alone without support from God. For me His presence had made a huge difference in my approach to the diagnosis, confirmation that it was cancer, and treatment plan.I don't feel completely hopeless and depressed. Borrowing from an army commercial, I feel motivated to 'be all I am meant to be'. Yes, I am post menopausal, morbidly obese, and have had cancer but am motivated to reduce risks of these cancers by changing my lifestyle. Spark people can help with the weight loss and fitness needs... for me God will help with Spiritual needs and everything else... for I truly believe God holds me in His hands. I encourage you all to hang in there, follow your doctor's advice and if you don't already have a church find one that actively believes in God, Jesus as Savior and an active living Holy Spirit- the Comforter who was sent by God to help us in all things until Jesus return. The Holy Spirit is not only for Pentecostals. He lives in each believer and guides, strengthens and comforts daily as we consult with Him. He is the third personality of God... not an inactive it as some people see Him. I pray that you and your loved ones fighting one of these diseases win the fight and are strengthened and supported during the struggle.

Mark 10:27 (TLB)"Without God, it is utterly impossible. But with God everything is possible." first ticker,intermediate goal. Lots to lose so 25 lb. increments seems to look more encouraging than the whole goal. (The bug moves further faster. I know it is a 'head thing but works for me somewhat like all the colored belts in martial arts encourage person to keep going to eventual goal of becoming black belt).
GGMOM06's Photo GGMOM06 Posts: 9,224
4/21/15 7:47 P

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emoticon emoticon do you have a church family ? If not please try to find one that can help you cope and be there for you if you need help . Please don't wait for the other shoe to fall , it is such an evil state of mind . If you are able maybe you could help someone else , i find it is a good thing to do . I don't know what you have but if it is Lymphoma could Imbruvica help you ? It is new but approved and when my hubby had Lymphoma in his head it reduced it to nothing and it is a pill . We couldn't pay a co-pay and the co. Johnson/Johnson along with his Ins. paid it all $12,000 a month . It works for Leukemia too .



a sinner saved by God's Grace and Mercy


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CHAROLASTRA00's Photo CHAROLASTRA00 Posts: 57
4/6/15 10:14 P

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I hate waiting for the other shoe to drop - even if it never does. It was always a given to me that I would grow up, go to college, find a career I loved, go to grad school, get married, have kids, and die when I was old. Or at least older. Suddenly, I couldn't measure my life beyond if I'd live to 25. I hit 25 and now I feel like I'm holding my breath to see if I make it to 30.

In the meantime, I've put my whole life on hold in so many ways. Staying at an employer (though in different roles) that leaves much to be desired because it offers health insurance and short term disability if I relapse, staying in a state that's incredibly expensive where I have to live with roommates despite a professional career because I don't want to leave my medical team or risk an insurance risk, and so many more things that leave me petrified in life. I was an adventurous person before I got cancer, but going through cancer alone with very little support from family or friends when you're just 23 has a way of making you incredibly risk averse. I hate the fearlessness and confidence that I would always figure things out that I lost.

Live every week like it's shark week.


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GGMOM06's Photo GGMOM06 Posts: 9,224
3/5/15 8:20 P

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I hate the way Hate has taken over my mind ! So i am not going to hate anymore and waste my precious time with my hubby ! please join me and fight the evil that has invaded our lives . I am so very sorry for your son and you having to have this awful fight . emoticon emoticon



a sinner saved by God's Grace and Mercy


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YOHANNAN's Photo YOHANNAN Posts: 44
3/5/15 2:56 P

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My son says he hates the long hospital visits.
I hate being afraid for him all of the time.

"The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson


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LADY_HAVOC Posts: 52
2/5/15 2:19 P

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I hate the fact that I have to spend the rest of my life without my beloved husband. I hate how our lives have changed. I hate that no one understands my life now.

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GGMOM06's Photo GGMOM06 Posts: 9,224
2/2/15 8:21 P

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emoticon My hubby had a Pet scan a few weeks ago and the metastasis on his liver is GONE !! Praise God !!! He will start chemo this week for 4 months but he is doing well and eating great , just a little tired still .



a sinner saved by God's Grace and Mercy


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GGMOM06's Photo GGMOM06 Posts: 9,224
12/1/14 8:22 P

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emoticon i hate that my hubby has had NHL in his spleen ( and almost died ) and in his sinuses and just when he was starting to kick it by taking IMBRUVICA we were told he now has pancreatic cancer ....had his spleen and all but the head of his pancreas out 3 wks ago ! Now he is home and can't stay awake , can't eat much of anything , everything taste awful to him now EVERYTHING ( except milk ) he has lost 28 lbs and of course he is now Diabetic taking 4 shots a day ! I just want to find SOMEBODY that has survived past 2 yrs and i can't ! Cancer for 15 yrs is just too much . Thanks for listening emoticon



a sinner saved by God's Grace and Mercy


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HAWKTHREE's Photo HAWKTHREE SparkPoints: (67,623)
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4/27/14 9:52 P

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We all have ou cancer things we hate. Whether you're a concerned caregiver or the person fighting cancer, what do you (what did you) hate most about it?


I hate being probed by strangers all the time.

----
There is no such thing as the final success in life. What is really meaningful is the courage to face the next minute, the next hour, the next day.


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