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6/8/12 8:08 A

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Sadly today is the first day that I will have to live without my husband. The funeral was extremely difficult yet it brought me some peace to know that he is no longer in pain.

Thank you all for your continued support

Dianne

HOPE is not pretending that there's never any sorrow - It's the knowledge that our troubles will be overcome tomorrow. It's the inner strength we call on to sustain us now and then, till our problems lie behind us and we are happy again


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KATEM31's Photo KATEM31 SparkPoints: (27,206)
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6/7/12 11:27 P

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Dianne, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Thinking of you during this time.

"And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count, it's the life in your years." - Abraham Lincoln

"I can't believe that we would lie in our graves wondering if we had spent our living days well" - Lie in Our Graves, Dave Matthews Band




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UNICORN212's Photo UNICORN212 Posts: 13,487
6/6/12 11:52 P

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Dianne - I am so sorry to hear that. Thank you for letting us know. Let us know if we can help - if you need to vent, etc.

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~Nancy


"Faith is not about everything turning out OK; Faith is about being OK no matter how things turn out."

"I would rather live my life as if there is a God, and die to find out there isn't, than to live my life as if there isn't, and die to find out there is."


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6/3/12 11:03 P

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Sadden to say that my husband passed away this evening at 7:00 pm

Dianne

HOPE is not pretending that there's never any sorrow - It's the knowledge that our troubles will be overcome tomorrow. It's the inner strength we call on to sustain us now and then, till our problems lie behind us and we are happy again


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JIBBIE49's Photo JIBBIE49 Posts: 76,406
6/3/12 9:45 A

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I'm thinking of all of you as this certainly is a horrible disease. I do hope you have good life insurance and hospital insurance so you aren't dealing with money issues. My darling son, Nathan has remained cancer free for three years now and will have his six month check up in August. After having Testicular Cancer, he was told he wouldn't be able to father children, but he now has an 8 month old DD, so that wasn't how it turned out. We do lots of reading about the long term effects of chemotherapy, so we know he may face more issues in years to come, especially from all the CatScans, but they have been a necessary evil.

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KATEM31's Photo KATEM31 SparkPoints: (27,206)
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6/1/12 9:34 P

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Diane, while I am saddened to hear about your husband, I'm glad to hear that his suffering will be over soon. Hold your memories tight, they'll get you through the rough road ahead. Praying for you and your husband.

"And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count, it's the life in your years." - Abraham Lincoln

"I can't believe that we would lie in our graves wondering if we had spent our living days well" - Lie in Our Graves, Dave Matthews Band




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FABTAB Posts: 31
6/1/12 7:14 P

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Oh, Dianne. I am imagining that you've let go, made your peace, and have a plan you will follow when your husband dies. You sound so sad, and so courageous.
Angi, it sounds like you're in a tense time, but I can't know for sure. How does "internal radiation" work? Michael's tumors grow from the bone marrow, so maybe it would apply.
Michael got home Monday. His first two days he spends sleeping. Last night he woke up vomiting. He stopped morphine while in hospital, a major improvement. Only one more chemo, and he has gradually grown so weak that he feels he couldn't take more.
I spent the past three days creating a garden for vegetables. Two hours with the pick ax, another hour with shovel, hauling loads of sod to the compost, etc. Still doing the stationary bike rides because my thighs are fat and my butt droops from too much sitting. One of my goals is to simply not sit all day. Going to call our friendly contractor now, Michael needs a safe way to get off the deck onto the lawn. Funny how determined a man gets when he sets up a squirrel feeder!

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6/1/12 7:31 A

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My husband is now in a deep coma and is expected to pass within a few days. My prayers go out to all of you fighting this terrible disease.

Dianne

HOPE is not pretending that there's never any sorrow - It's the knowledge that our troubles will be overcome tomorrow. It's the inner strength we call on to sustain us now and then, till our problems lie behind us and we are happy again


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ABBYNORMALOH75's Photo ABBYNORMALOH75 SparkPoints: (6,696)
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5/31/12 8:32 P

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as i posted a while back when i joined, my fiance has stage 4 rectal cancer metted to the liver. he is now at the point where chemo is no longer effective and we are doing more radiation to keep him comfortable. if his health can hold out a little longer they are talking about doing internal radiation to the tumors in the liver, but he has been sick lately and experiencing so many side effects, i am fearful. today was really hard. i know he is dying, but i am not ready yet and i worry that it is going to come faster than i am prepared for. just had to come on and vent, i really dont know anyone else i can talk to.

angi

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5/19/12 9:27 P

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Good idea about throwing away the car keys. The palliative care residence is within a 15 min walk from my place so I will certainly be getting my exercise. My prayers are with you and Michael. Let me know how things go.

Take care,

Dianne

HOPE is not pretending that there's never any sorrow - It's the knowledge that our troubles will be overcome tomorrow. It's the inner strength we call on to sustain us now and then, till our problems lie behind us and we are happy again


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FABTAB Posts: 31
5/19/12 8:18 P

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Sorry for not posting sooner. Thank you, Dianne. I will be facing "palliative care", or whatever options there are.
Been working really hard, physically: yard work, walking errands, exercising on mystationary bike. Staying on the diet pretty well. I lost it for three nights, and ate lots of almonds and raisins. I keep chewing gum in the cabinet -- LOTS of it in all flavors, but I went for high calorie stuff.

Michael is feeling really good now. He's been able to drive to the store, think clearly for a few hours a day, and has a positive attitude. He even made pizza one night (I had mine without cheese). Thursday, we see the oncologist and chances are high he'll go in for chemo. We're getting close to the end of it. Probably one or two more. We'll go to Portland again to harvest stem cells, I'm sure. I assume they want that done before Michael is too weak.

Any time you want to speed up the weight loss, throw away the car keys ;) TAB

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5/13/12 9:01 A

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Good morning everyone. Palliative care is where you go to die. No further treatment is possible. The staff is trained to deal with end of life patients and their families. Patients can be in palliative care a maximum of about 3 months (sooner if very ill). The patients have their own rooms set up so that families can come and stay with their loved one. It's a way of dying with dignity.

Dianne


HOPE is not pretending that there's never any sorrow - It's the knowledge that our troubles will be overcome tomorrow. It's the inner strength we call on to sustain us now and then, till our problems lie behind us and we are happy again


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FABTAB Posts: 31
5/12/12 9:01 P

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Thanks very much to both of you. Exactly what is palliative care? It sounds serious. My sister had her last radiation treatment for breast cancer this week. She says she got horizontal black stripes across her fingernails and her eyelashes and eyebrowns finally fell out. She already went to classes about make-up, wigs, and activities like gym classes, and she does all these. She has a great sense of humor about herself. It helps to listen to her. Michael has no sense of humor.
We have been to a market just across the street twice now. I don't drive, and Michael's ankles are partially paralyzed from a gumor on his spine, so he only drives a couple of blocks. We had a lovely time at their coffee bar yesterday. It was a rare moment of "normal." We decided to look for more things we can do to experience life without cancer.

Ditto on the Spark diet. My guy eats lots of junk food. I cook for myself and stay with Spark menus, but Michael raids the stuff I cook! At least he gets some nourishment :)

Happy mother's day if you have children. I have four cats, but no little humanoids.
Terrel

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KATEM31's Photo KATEM31 SparkPoints: (27,206)
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5/12/12 6:38 P

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My mom had a very small tumor removed from her breast on Thursday (it was also my parents 43rd anniversary). She has a post op appt on Wednesday where we'll learn more about her treatment, but the doctor was optimistic about the surgery and the treatment. They're hoping for twice a day radiation for 5 days.

Continuing to pray for all of you and your families.

"And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count, it's the life in your years." - Abraham Lincoln

"I can't believe that we would lie in our graves wondering if we had spent our living days well" - Lie in Our Graves, Dave Matthews Band




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ENNAID11's Photo ENNAID11 SparkPoints: (0)
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5/12/12 9:49 A

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Hi Fabtab - My husband has terminal (final phase) of lung cancer. His cancer is progressing quickly and he may have to be put in palliative care within the next couple of weeks as his pain in not always under control, he barely eats and the strength of the meds makes him very confused.

I really have not been following my Sparks diet. When I cook, it often makes dh nausaus so I am snacking more than having sit down meals. Not a good thing as I am gaining weight. I really am going to have to be more careful as I do not want to go back to my past weight.

Take care of yourself and your dh.

Dianne

HOPE is not pretending that there's never any sorrow - It's the knowledge that our troubles will be overcome tomorrow. It's the inner strength we call on to sustain us now and then, till our problems lie behind us and we are happy again


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FABTAB Posts: 31
5/11/12 11:37 A

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Since I didn't see this topic yet, I thought I'd jump in.

Husband has multiple myeloma, a blood/bone cancer. Since I don't drive, I get most of my exercise walking and carrying things, like yesterday's 20 lb bag of potting soil and 24can carton of diet pepsi. He's eating healthier because I'm on Spark's diet. Lost four pounds the last two weeks doing the usual errands an work outs. TAB

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