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KAT860's Photo KAT860 Posts: 79
8/18/09 4:23 P

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Thank you Jibbie for your kind thoughts. You are right cancer is a terrible disease. I am so happy that your son got good test results. I know this has been a stressful experience for you as well as him. Roger has his good days and some not so good ones when he is really tired. But fortunately he has not been sick at all. That is a blessing. Take care. Hugs, Kat

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JIBBIE49's Photo JIBBIE49 Posts: 75,932
8/18/09 3:23 P

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Kat, I am so sorry, since Cancer is such a horrible illness. Do make sure he gets a lot of pain meds.

My son, Nathan, got results from his 3 Cat Scans, which were read by 8 different doctors and his doctor and they found no tumors from his testicular cancer. BUT, his follow up will continue for 10 years, and he got a print out of what it will be. Next tests are in 3 months with chest xray and blood tests. He is getting his hair back.

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KAT860's Photo KAT860 Posts: 79
8/17/09 6:34 P

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Hi, I am new here but I just wanted to let each one of you know about my situation and ask for your prayers as I pray for you all. My husband,Roger has been diagnosed in March with small cell lung cancer and it has begun to spread to his ribs and his spine. So he is struggling some days more than others. And like you all I am feeling the stress. But I will just hang in there and hope and pray for the best.

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JIBBIE49's Photo JIBBIE49 Posts: 75,932
8/8/09 1:13 P

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My son's Testicular Cancer is on-going. He has 3 CatScans on Monday to see if he has any Tumors. Then he sees the doctor on the 17th and has his regular bloodwork, which will be done every 4 weeks for 2 years and then every 3 months for 3 more years. I do hope all will go well for him. Last check his white blood cell count was low, but his hair is starting to grow back, so that is good. I have his picture on my Sparkpage. I wanted my children to have a picture with him, just in case this doesn't have a happy ending, so that is why he didn't cover his bald head.

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ARTMISTRESS78's Photo ARTMISTRESS78 Posts: 2,149
8/2/09 3:36 P

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hi everyone. hope things are going well for you or as well as they can be!

just to check in...things have been going well for my aunt for the past year, but unfortunately new test results say that the chemo is no longer working. she's decided to try a clinical trial where they will put on two different chemo treatments plus some type of other treatment that is experimental. her and one other woman at our cancer center are doing it, one will get the placebo and one will get the medicine. we don't know which!

either way, it's scary to be going from a place of stability and hope to her feeling worse and having to try new treatments with unknown side effects. she's gone from talking about vacations in florida and what she wants to do next week to planning her funeral and working on her obituary. the mood of the house has indeed shifted.

me? i've been having some problems. i've been feeling angry, this before the bad news about my aunt's treatments. i've been trapped in my little guest room in her house for a year and three months now. i just want to get on with my life! so i think those anxieties and frustrations are coming out. and it's hard not to feel bad about these feelings when you know that the only way they are going to end is when she passes away. ugh...double edged sword much?!

i'm starting to go back to my caretakers support group meetings, so that should help me out some. in the meantime, the future is a blank canvas...

I'll make the most of it, I'm an extraordinary machine. sarashawger.com


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TOMMIENANA's Photo TOMMIENANA Posts: 334
7/8/09 6:37 P

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hello all ! i haven't been on in a while now, been busy. hubby had his cancer surgery on march 31 & he's been in & out of the hospital alot. hope that parts over with! he's doing better now.
i have also started school & almost halfway through it yes !!!!
hope everyone is doing good this evening emoticon

OUR LORD WILL WALK WITH US DAILY .


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ROMMY143's Photo ROMMY143 Posts: 28
6/17/09 4:59 A

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Hello everyone. I am new to the group. It's so nice to find a group of people who can relate to this struggle. I've been meaning to find a cancer caregiver support group in my area, but I've been either too busy, too lazy, or too full of excuses to do it.

I posted this somewhere else, but I thought I'd fill you in on my particular situation: My mom was diagnosed with lung cancer in 2007 at 50 years old. It came as a total shock to us as she has been a life-long non-smoker. In fact, no one in my family has ever touched a cigarette let alone smoked. I thought lung cancer was a smoker's disease. WRONG!

In Feb 2008 she had her entire left lung removed along with surrounding lymph nodes. She recovered very quickly, was in good spirits, and we all believed she could beat it. But, by June of that year we found the cancer had spread to her bones. By that point, her left femur had been eaten away by the cancer almost completely. It was devastating. She had surgery to repair and stabilize her leg, but that marked a progressive downturn in her condition.

She is now at the end of her battle. Words cannot express the roller coaster of emotions I feel on a day-to-day basis. I'm here, however, to get myself healthy and strong so that I can be there for my little girl for many years to come.

For all those touched by this horrible illness in some way - Stay strong! Thank you for your support. I look forward to hearing more from all of you. You are in my prayer and I hope to see good updates from you soon.

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JIBBIE49's Photo JIBBIE49 Posts: 75,932
6/2/09 12:17 A

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My son, Nathan has Testicular Cancer and he went for his blood count check today and it was up, so I'm happy. He has his 4th and final week of Chemo, starting next Monday, so I know he will be very sick. But, we are hopeful he will get well.

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JIBBIE49's Photo JIBBIE49 Posts: 75,932
5/20/09 1:22 P

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Did you see that NINE MILLION people watched Farrah's Story on Friday night making it the highest rated NBC show on Friday night in the past year? It was very informative.

Nathan has been very sick since his third chemotherapy round and is having to have extra IV Fluids this week because of his sickness.

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JIBBIE49's Photo JIBBIE49 Posts: 75,932
5/4/09 8:49 P

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Nathan went for his Chemotherapy this morning, but his Blood Cell Count was to low (800 and has to be a minimum of 1500), so he has three shots for the week to stimulate his bone marrow. Then he goes for the Chemo next week.
I feel sorry for all the people we see at the Cancer Center in there to get treatment. Makes me feel very sad for them, but makes me know that I have to take care of my health. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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JIBBIE49's Photo JIBBIE49 Posts: 75,932
5/1/09 1:15 A

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I hope your father is doing better. My son, Nathan has Testicular Cancer, and goes Monday for Round 3 of his 4 rounds of Chemotherapy. This is difficult to say the least.

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ARTMISTRESS78's Photo ARTMISTRESS78 Posts: 2,149
4/7/09 1:05 A

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long time no update! i guess no news is good news, at least in my aunt's case. she's actually doing really well and has had some good news lately. she'll get the full report tomorrow, but an initial PETscan shows that the tumors in her pelvis have stopped growing and have basically ceased activity. she meets with the docs tomorrow to see about the rest of the tumors, but it seems like the chemo is actually working!

also, she's working on getting her back fixed (nothing to do with the cancer, but was abandoned when they found the cancer). if she can get it fixed, she'll be out of pain and can lead somewhat of a normal life without being drugged all the time for the pain!

on a sad note, my grandma, her mother, passed away last month. she was 79 and very sick from over 50 years of smoking. still, it was sudden. but we got to go home and see friends and family that my aunt may never have seen again otherwise.

me?! i'm okay. after the visit home i got pretty down. i had a very short taste of seeing my friends again. yet, i spent the whole time with my aunt and didn't even get to spend any time with the rest of the family. i felt more like her personal assistant than like i was home. i keep getting antsy because i want to go live my life. as much as i'm glad my aunt is doing well...she wasn't supposed to last past october! in one month i'll celebrate my one year of moving to santa fe to take care of her. i wonder if we'll be celebrating it together next year?

I'll make the most of it, I'm an extraordinary machine. sarashawger.com


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DEWEY101's Photo DEWEY101 Posts: 72
3/9/09 7:04 P

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Sending Loads of Love and Prayers to everyone in this group. Having someone you love suffer with cancer isn't easy and it really takes over your life.

(I'm approaching the 1 year anniversary of my best friends death on April 13. She was just 31 yrs old. I am so glad I spent so much time with her while she was ill, and I let her know how much she meant to me...but even now, I feel like it wasn't enough)

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ARTMISTRESS78's Photo ARTMISTRESS78 Posts: 2,149
2/19/09 1:06 P

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hello all, haven't been in for awhile so i thought i'd drop in. needed to talk a little, too i guess. i wasn't able to go to my support group meeting yesterday because my aunt wanted to go out to dinner and do some shopping. that's good...sorta. i think she was trying to make herself feel better. we got the results of her brain MRI yesterday morning and nothing seems to have changed, which i thought was great! but all she could really focus on was that nothing got better. she's hoping like hell to see some signs of remission.

the one thing that we're trying to focus on is to fix her pinched nerve in her back. that is more of a cause of physical pain and discomfort than anything and all her pain meds are for that, not the cancer. they will probably do an MRI on her back to make sure the bones have not been effected by the cancer. if they have, they'll treat it and she'll feel better. if they haven't, she'll look into laser surgery to fix it and she'll feel better. i'd rather it not be cancer related, but either way, she should be feeling better.

it scares me a little, but it's a good sign...she talked about getting her pinched nerve fixed and getting off the vicadin and starting to drive again. and then she said that if she was feeling really good, i could even move out. soooo, is she tired of me?! does she just want to be by herself and independent again(probably)?! is she that hopeful that she'll be fine and beat stage 4 cancer?! i moved out here for her and i've started to build a life and a job for myself, but it's expensive. i'll be screwed if i have to pay rent and utilities somewhere. it sounds horrible to say, but she wasn't supposed to get better...i was supposed to stay with her until the end. i don't know if i can make it without getting 2 more jobs, and then i won't be able to help her at all.

and oddly, she wants me to stop calling her 'aunt kathy'! i've called her that for 30 years!!! she says it makes her feel old! i guess i could try to call her kathy or kathleen, but it feels so weird. and i still have to say she's my aunt when people ask who she is. weird. this is all just so weird.

I'll make the most of it, I'm an extraordinary machine. sarashawger.com


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ARTMISTRESS78's Photo ARTMISTRESS78 Posts: 2,149
1/23/09 1:02 P

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no worries, KIWI, we all want to escape or run away sometimes. i skip my support group meeting sometimes, too, because i don't feel like being sad or talking about it anymore. allow yourself time to 'forget' just to keep yourself happy and healthy for your family, that's the best way to take care of them!

SMILEY, i'm sorry you're having a rough time. the holidays are definitely tough. i'll be thinking of you and sending good thoughts!

ive been okay. struggling a little with how to react to some of the things my aunt says. we got hooked on all the medical dramas on thursday nights. bad idea! there's always a story on cancer or just dying in general. i never paid that much attention before, but now my aunt starts wondering out loud if her fate will be like this or that. i just don't know what to say. i just want to turn the tv off and try to change the subject!

my aunt is scheduled for her next MRI in three weeks. we'll find out then if the chemo is doing any good. i think there will be much celebrating if there is any type of remission. but what if there isn't? what if it's worse? she's gonna get depressed and i might not be able to get her out of it. i just keep wondering...how much time does she have? and in what condition will she spend it?


I'll make the most of it, I'm an extraordinary machine. sarashawger.com


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KIM*03's Photo KIM*03 SparkPoints: (0)
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1/21/09 3:05 P

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Smiley3826 - My thoughts and prayers are with you. I wish I had just the right words to say to make things easier for you.
I feel like my husband and I are living on borrowed time right now (he has advanced pancreatic cancer) and it makes me very sad thinking about a future without him.
I hope you can find some comfort in the years you did spend together and to know that you will be together again someday.
God bless.


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SMILEY3826's Photo SMILEY3826 Posts: 2,737
1/20/09 8:25 A

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i'm having a rough time this week. i feel really down and depressed. i really miss my husband, who passed away from cancer a few days after christmas last year. this is the first time in years that i have been completely on my own. my parents are looking after our almost 4 year old daughter until i can find a new place to live. i have two beautiful pet budgie birds to look after,too. they are such an important part of my family. i know he is not suffering any more and is finally at peace. i am just having a hard time this week in not having him here with me. please include me in your thoughts and prayers as i work through the immense lonliness and sadness i am feeling this week. my daughter needs her mommy to be really strong. she really misses her daddy.the two of them shared a special,close bond. now i am being both mommy and daddy to her. i need the extra support this week. i am seeing a grief counsellor tomorrow. i sure can use the extra help and support. the grief counsellor will be working with me to help me get through this without going into a deep depression. thanks for your ongoing support,thoughts and prayers. i can use some extra support this week. have a great day,all!

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KIWI122's Photo KIWI122 Posts: 764
1/18/09 7:49 P

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I wanted to confess that in a moment of denial I left this team because I don't want to think about my Dad's cancer. I don't want to think about all the times he's been and will go in the hospital or how much pain he has every time they do surgery.

But it's a fact of life that cancer is part of my entire family's thought process, every day now. So I cannot hide, and for Dad's sake, shouldn't try to hide from this reality.

I am sorry if I seem callous for leaving the team. I want to be supportive to all of you because this is a very hard thing to go through and thinking of what other people are enduring with this, too, somehow helps me feel not so alone or so burdened.

Dieting is not a piece of cake.
~Author Unknown


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TOMMIENANA's Photo TOMMIENANA Posts: 334
12/31/08 11:38 P

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happy new year to all my spark friends.
hubby is out of hospital and is doing a little better. he still has a really bad cough, dr's will not give him any cough meds so hoping the cough goes away soon.
he has 1 more week after this week of chemo and radiation... we are looking forward to the end of chemo ... after the surgery he will have to do 2 more weeks of chemo though. we do not have a surgery date set yet, will let you know when we do.
i start school jan 23, 2009 and i am really excited about it, i am going to be a medical assistant. i have been out of school for so long it's a little scary and exciting all at the same time for me.

tommienana emoticon

OUR LORD WILL WALK WITH US DAILY .


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KIWI122's Photo KIWI122 Posts: 764
12/29/08 6:57 P

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Tommienana, I am sorry to hear about your husband's health. It is such a hard time of year to have a loved one in the hospital. I wish you and him the best possible outcome to this.

Dieting is not a piece of cake.
~Author Unknown


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JIACOLO's Photo JIACOLO SparkPoints: (597,043)
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12/28/08 11:08 A

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Sorry to hear about your husband! I hope that he will be able to come home soon for you and your family.

If you focus on results, you will never change. If you focus on change, you will get results.

- It's Janine!


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TOMMIENANA's Photo TOMMIENANA Posts: 334
12/27/08 3:12 A

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not a great christmas for our house emoticon
hubby was put into the hospital for phemonia in his left lung christmas eve morning and he's still there tonight. doctor say maybe sunday or monday before he'll get out. he is feeling better though and he's up walking a little.
i let all the little ones open their gifts but us adults have decided we will wait till hubby gets home to have our christmas.
i hope everyone had a wonderful christmas and you all have a great new years.

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OUR LORD WILL WALK WITH US DAILY .


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ARTMISTRESS78's Photo ARTMISTRESS78 Posts: 2,149
12/22/08 12:58 A

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i'm glad your hubby is reacting well to the radiation! that's definitely a weight off your shoulders!

my aunt is doing exceptionally well. she has her bad days, but her blood work is excellent and the word 'remission' has come up more than once. in any case, she's going all out preparing for christmas with baking and decorating (i.e...making me decorate!). she even put on her best wig and went to a single's party last night!

hope you all have a wonderful holiday with your family!

I'll make the most of it, I'm an extraordinary machine. sarashawger.com


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TOMMIENANA's Photo TOMMIENANA Posts: 334
12/17/08 2:50 P

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hubby is doing great on his chemo and radiation treatments. he's on his 2nd week now and having no side effects so far.
i hope everyone has a merry christmas and a happy new year.

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OUR LORD WILL WALK WITH US DAILY .


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KIWI122's Photo KIWI122 Posts: 764
12/9/08 3:22 A

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My Dad will be having surgery this Friday to remove several small tumors from his bladder. He is 70 years old and still seems quite strong despite battling the cancer (kidney and prostate as well) for the last 7 years.

I have decided to make him fudge for Christmas. He hasn't had this family staple in years and I hope it will cheer him up a little.

Dieting is not a piece of cake.
~Author Unknown


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TOMMIENANA's Photo TOMMIENANA Posts: 334
12/7/08 8:22 P

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hubby got port put in thursday and he will start radiation and chemo tomorrw morning emoticon
hope i can get through this. my doctor finally put me on prozac togo along with my zanax, hope it pulls me through.
i felt great all day today except when i forgot to take my zanax before church tonight and had to hurry and take it and pray it would work fast before church started and it did... praise the lord!!
hope everyone has a wonderful monday emoticon

OUR LORD WILL WALK WITH US DAILY .


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HEILAS's Photo HEILAS SparkPoints: (0)
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11/25/08 1:43 P

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emoticon Sending heaps of love to all the members of this team.

God Bless emoticon

My God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus. Phil. 4:19

The Lord sustains the fatherless and the widow. Psalm 146:9

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.


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RUNNERMOMTO3's Photo RUNNERMOMTO3 Posts: 5,669
11/17/08 10:11 A

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I'm not exactly how I felt when my sis-in-law was alive. I helped out with babysitting her babies, I solely did 1 fundraiser for her and my brother and then I co-helped do another HUGE fundraiser for her and my brother. I had so many people tell me how wonderful and how great I am for doing this for her. I didnt think it was that big of a deal. They needed the money to live and it was something easy to do, so I did it. In her last days I was there pretty much 24-7 helping with the kids and helping with grocery shopping etc.... people again would kept telling me how wonderful i am for doing this. I felt the same way though, I didnt get why I was so wonderful and special I was for doing that. I wanted to make sure my little nieces and nephews had food in their tummies and whatever else they needed. So yeah I would get embarrassed when they would say that and then feel bad because I was so tired and just wanted to go home and crawl into my own bed to cry. Emotions were just all over the place those last days.
tracy

Tracy~~Independent Beach Body Coach
Grand Blanc, Mi
"You have a choice. You can throw in the towel, or you can use it to wipe the sweat off of your face."
Gatorade

www.beachbodycoach.com/runnermomto3


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ARTMISTRESS78's Photo ARTMISTRESS78 Posts: 2,149
11/17/08 1:10 A

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so i started going to a caregivers support group. i've only been to two so far. i don't know how i feel about it yet. sometimes i think we spend too much time talking about the people in our lives that are sick and not enough about us. most of my life now is about her, call me selfish, but i wanted this one thing to be about me.

other than that, random question. does anyone else feel guilty when people tell you that you're 'brave' or 'such a good person' for taking care of [insert relative here]? i feel embarrassed when people say that, and then feel bad because of all the times i get angry or resentful for being here....i don't feel brave or like a good person. i just feel like this is something that i'm doing while trying to still live my life.

I'll make the most of it, I'm an extraordinary machine. sarashawger.com


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HEILAS's Photo HEILAS SparkPoints: (0)
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11/11/08 8:20 A

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emoticon emoticon emoticon

Hello everyone. My name is Heila from Cape Town South Africa.

Just want to let you know I am praying for each and every one of you.

God Bless

Heila emoticon

My God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus. Phil. 4:19

The Lord sustains the fatherless and the widow. Psalm 146:9

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... It's about learning to dance in the rain.


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ARTMISTRESS78's Photo ARTMISTRESS78 Posts: 2,149
11/7/08 2:29 P

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oh, and by the way....this epstein barr virus gets around, doesn't it?! i had mono two years ago (whether from stress or making out with too many people at that halloween party that year, i'll never know). basically it's the worst thing that has ever happened to me. i am still suffering the consequences. i get fatigued soooo easily, which is why it's hard for me to exercise as much as i want to. i get bad headaches if i don't get enough sleep or work out too hard. every time i think i'm feeling better....i get hit with a sinus infection and more fatigue and headaches. i just want it to go away so i can take care of myself and my aunt!!

at the moment i'm taking a B-complex that i mix in with my water. i try to stay away from alcohol (try) and drink a ton of water. i'm not sure what else to do. i have no health insurance and can't afford all the blood tests and doctor visits. i'm tired of being tired!

anywho...just wanted to share your pain!

I'll make the most of it, I'm an extraordinary machine. sarashawger.com


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ARTMISTRESS78's Photo ARTMISTRESS78 Posts: 2,149
11/7/08 1:02 P

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whoa nellie, we have some heavy stuff here! life sure takes it's toll on us one way or another.

first of all LAMEXICAN, you can't let guilt take over! yeah, maybe stress has a something to do with it, but so does biology and what we eat and what we drink and the products we use. this is not your fault! so please please don't put that added pressure and STRESS on yourself, which could in turn cause sickness in YOU! be strong and be courageous and help him by listening and by making him laugh. in taking care of my aunt, this is the best advice i can give. you know what they say, laughter is the best medicine and it helps them forget, even for a moment. (it works for you too!) i watch funny cat videos on youtube and then email the links to my aunt from work!

tracy, congrats on running again! it will only make you stronger and your heart stronger!!



I'll make the most of it, I'm an extraordinary machine. sarashawger.com


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LAMEXICANFEMALE's Photo LAMEXICANFEMALE Posts: 256
11/7/08 8:57 A

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Hi Everyone,

Thank you for sharing all your stories. I hope you all keep posting. Sometimes I feel very alone because noone I know has a close family member that has cancer and it can be hard to understand what we go through. I feel like when I talk about it to my friends, I am bringing them down. So thank you for allowing me a space to talk about my dad's cancer.

My dad had his last treatment for the month yesterday. When I talked to him, he sounded different, like he was in pain. He said he got a nurse? that didn't know what she was doing and was rough with him. I hate it when he feels down. I get off the phone and I'm a mess. I am very strong for him, but I'm a mess inside. My dad and I have had a hard relationship and at this point in my life I have learned to understand what happened to him and to us as a family.

Sometimes I feel like maybe I was partially responsible for the cancer coming because I caused him alot of stress. I was not talking to my family for about 2 years and my dad was very upset that a doctor called me trying to repair the relationship. When I finally called, I said everything that had hurt in my childhood. I was crying and just finally said everything I had been holding in. My dad listened and told me to get it out. It was over --all my pain. And now we are dealing with his cancer.

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RUNNERMOMTO3's Photo RUNNERMOMTO3 Posts: 5,669
11/3/08 4:40 P

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Carol, I didnt take it as being preachy. I do think about the toll that running can and does take on the body but its just something that makes me feel really, really good and its just hard to stop.

I was diagnosed with EBV when my littlest daughter now 9 yrs old was maybe around 1 1/2 yrs old. I thought I was just exhausted from having 3 kids ages 4 and under. The day I decided to go see a doctor I was cleaning out my van and fell asleep on the floor of the van. The neighbor came over to check on me and she insisted that I go see a doctor that its more than being exhausted from being a mother to 3 little ones. Like you I was sick ALL THE TIME!! Get over one thing and I would be sick with something else literally two days later. Thankfully my doctor tested for all the right things and said that the enyzeme was WAY, WAY off the charts...normal was something like .0445 something like that mine came back as .621 something like that it was high that I know. I did what the doc told me to do and within that year I was feeling tons better. Today its under control and as long as I stay away from white flours, caffeine I'm fine. I do notice a difference if I eat pizza or white pasta.

Edited by: RUNNERMOMTO3 at: 11/3/2008 (21:14)
Tracy~~Independent Beach Body Coach
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"You have a choice. You can throw in the towel, or you can use it to wipe the sweat off of your face."
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VELVETSAPPHIRE's Photo VELVETSAPPHIRE Posts: 819
11/3/08 4:20 P

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Tracy,

My heart aches for all of you and I remember so well how the body pays us back when we are under stress. I was sick for 5 years with Epstein Barr Virus after my mother was diagnosed and died of cancer ~ my immune system was in such bad shape that I fought one infection after another, missed tons of work months at a time and slept 20 to 22 hours a day when I was home. Even taking a breath was difficult because I was just literally exhausted and uanble to stay awake or do anything.

I'm glad you are getting back to your exercise and if you can't run, you can always walk which isn't as damaging to your joints. I maintained 120 lbs for years because I did a lot of walking, then the post polio problems hit and now I'm lucky to get to the bathroom in time emoticon My right knee has been replaced, my left knee needs to be replaced and my left ankle has been fused (before they had ankle replacements).

I hope and pray you don't end up damaging any joints from the constant pounding from running ~ the surgeries and therapy are very difficult and extremely painful and the ankle fusion, although needed, is one I regret having because now that knee is damaged from walking incorrectly since 96. Only three exercises I am allowed to do now is swimming (the best cardio possible), stationary bike and the EFX (elliptical) machine because none of those causes joint damage.

Didn't mean to preach, just wanted to share some things I have learned through the years with all my health issues. Keeping all of you in prayer.

Carol

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(.( ;. Carol *)♥
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I am a polio survivor

Jesus is my Savior and King, the only Messiah I need
RUNNERMOMTO3's Photo RUNNERMOMTO3 Posts: 5,669
11/3/08 1:55 P

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ARTMISTRESS78~ I was actually given the okay several months ago to start my running again but frankly I have been too scared and worried and stressed about getting out there. She knew I was worried but she also knew that I had been given the okay by my cardiologist. She urged me to atleast try and if I felt I couldn't do it, then stop but she asked me to just try that way I would never have any regrets. Sooo I started running 2 weeks ago and each run has just gotten better and better.
tracy

Edited by: RUNNERMOMTO3 at: 11/3/2008 (13:56)
Tracy~~Independent Beach Body Coach
Grand Blanc, Mi
"You have a choice. You can throw in the towel, or you can use it to wipe the sweat off of your face."
Gatorade

www.beachbodycoach.com/runnermomto3


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ARTMISTRESS78's Photo ARTMISTRESS78 Posts: 2,149
11/3/08 12:08 P

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wow, tracy, you've certainly been through a lot lately. i hope you're doing ok after your heart attack. good luck getting back into running, just take it slow. it would be wonderful if you would be able to do it for her and for yourself. take care and keep in touch with us!

I'll make the most of it, I'm an extraordinary machine. sarashawger.com


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RUNNERMOMTO3's Photo RUNNERMOMTO3 Posts: 5,669
11/3/08 9:45 A

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Hi everyone,

First of all just know that my thoughts and prayers are with everyone.

My sister in law (32 yrs) passed away basically 3 weeks ago. Its been difficult there isn't a day that hasn't passed that something doesn't trigger a memory of her. The other day I was coming home from the store and this ambulance pulled up next to me..tiggered the memory of the day of her death when the ambulance came and took her to the funeral home.

I see a shade of purple I think of her. I know its only been 3 weeks and I know its going to be a long road ahead of us. It just hurts to know she isn't there anymore. I'm SO thankful I took the time to be with her during her last week of her life. On Tuesday Oct.7th I went to her house and spent about 2 hours with her, rubbed her legs and just talked with her. At times she made no sense what so ever and other times she talked just like you or I.

She too watched a lot of judge shows, game shows. She couldn't get out of bed probably the last 3 weeks. My brother told me that they were taking her back to the hospital because she wasn't able to go to the bathroom anymore and she needed to have a cather put in. Wednesday the 8th, her doctor or counselor I 'm not sure told her that the cancer had won. The cancer had spread to her lungs and she wasn't not going to be able to fight it any longer. Her doctor came to tell my husband and I that she only had a short amount of time left. She had opted to come back home to die. She passed away in her sleep on Oct. 14th. Her parents had been staying there at her home to help care for thier daughter. Her dad had a bed set up at the foot of Brenda's bed and Brenda had pitched a fit the night before about wanting to go outside to sit. Her dad told her no she couldn't go out. Her dad told her to go to sleep and Brenda said no because when she goes to sleep those people are coming back to take her. Her dad asked what people and she named some and everyone she had named was someone who was deceased. She named my brother and my grandfather, someone she never even met because he died in 1993 before she met my brother. Her dad said he knew she was real close, she passd the next day we figure around 11:45-noon on the 14th.

She is the first person I have close to me that was diagnosed with cancer. This is my firs expierence with it and all the treatments and the horrific things that happen to the body because of the cancer and the side effects of the medicines.

She has given me the strength to get back to my running. The day before she went into the hospital she asked me if I was ever going to run again. I told her I wasn't sure that I was scared to get back out there. She made me promise that I would atleast try to get back out there that she would watch over me and protect me. You see the day she was diagnosed with cancer I suffered a heart attack. Within 45 minutes of getting the phone call that her test came back positive for pancreatic cancer I started having chest pains. That is why my running stopped because of the heart attack.

I written a book, sorry. I tend to get this way when talking about her.

Tracy

Tracy~~Independent Beach Body Coach
Grand Blanc, Mi
"You have a choice. You can throw in the towel, or you can use it to wipe the sweat off of your face."
Gatorade

www.beachbodycoach.com/runnermomto3


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VELVETSAPPHIRE's Photo VELVETSAPPHIRE Posts: 819
10/26/08 12:30 A

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Hi again,

ARTMISTRESS78 ~ have you heard of the proton therapy that Loma Linda Hospital has? That was one thing brought to our attention when we first learned of my husband's cancer and they use it to treat cancer in the brain, lungs and prostate. We found out that MD Anderson Cancer Hospital in Houston also does it and had considered going that route but my husband doesn't want just a treatment, he wants to know they have removed the cancer and checked the surrounding area to see if it has spread any. Thanks for your well wishes ~ will be sure and let you know when we have more news :)

I had an aunt and an uncle (married to each other) who both came down with cancer. He had a tumor in one kidney, had it removed and short of 5 years later, they found a tumor in the other kidney. He was a robust man who dwindled down to 150 lbs. All he did was sit and watch TV, go to his treatments and as time went on, he slept alot. While he is dealing with all this, my aunt was going through chemo for her leukemia. They got her leukemia in remission but the chemo damaged her kidneys and heart. After my uncle died, she did ok for about a year, then the swelling in her legs and feet started. They got so bad, she went from a size 5 shoe to a slip on slipper that was a size 10 and when she would walk, the fluids would seep out of her legs and feet.

When my uncle got so he could barely move out of his chair where he watched TV all the time, I used to go over after work each night and rub his back and shoulders. He called me Nurse Carol and went on and on about how good it felt.

When my aunt's feet got really bad, I went over and massaged her legs and feet to try and help the fluids move out and relieve some of the tautness in the skin. If they wanted something to eat that they didn't have in the house, I ran to the store and got it for them because they couldn't go. Sometimes it's just the little things that let them know how special they are and we need to do what we can to make them as comfortable as possible.

When my husband first found out about his cancer, he tried to be brave for a few days but he finally broke down and said he was afraid and we cried together. It's hard for us to truly understand that fear unless we have walked in their shoes and I hope and pray I never have to understand it from that angle. I have had a lot of health issues of my own and hope and pray that doesn't become another one and that's another good reason to get this weight off ~ although I'm not doing well in that area this year, especially right now.

I'm rambling so will shut up ~ just wanted to share some thoughts with all of you. I will check out your aunt's site and see what she has on there. Just so you know, if you use the Add A Link and put the address in that, we can click on the link from this page :) I didn't know that until a few months ago when someone pointed it out to me.

God bless all of you and those you love,
Carol

.* ) .*) -::-
(.( ;. Carol *)♥
.* ) .*) -::-
(.( ;.*)♥ *)-::-

I am a polio survivor

Jesus is my Savior and King, the only Messiah I need
ARTMISTRESS78's Photo ARTMISTRESS78 Posts: 2,149
10/25/08 11:57 P

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she watches a lot of tv. like a lot. it helps her keep her mind off of things. she watches reality tv, judge shows, and game shows. things that aren't too serious, but either make her think or make her laugh. unfortunately i'm at work a lot, so i don't get to take her places or distract her in other ways. my best advice is to try and make them laugh as much as possible.

she also finds comfort in a website i started for her. it's for people who are sick to keep in touch with family and friends and not have to repeat everything a million times. her site is on caringbridge and the link is listed below (thanks for the tip carol!). she loves when people leave comments...kinda like sparkpeople or myspace!

as for the stress eating...when my aunt is getting her chemo infusions, instead of heading for the starbucks next door, i take a long walk on the trail near the cancer center. it's good exercise and it helps to clear my head. good luck to you and your family.

and good luck to you, too, carol and your husband. i know the hardest part most of the time is waiting for answers. keep us posted. www.caringbridge.com/visit/kathleenb
ar
ry


Edited by: ARTMISTRESS78 at: 10/26/2008 (13:21)
I'll make the most of it, I'm an extraordinary machine. sarashawger.com


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LAMEXICANFEMALE's Photo LAMEXICANFEMALE Posts: 256
10/25/08 9:16 P

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How is your aunt handling all this? My dad tries really hard to keep himself distracted. I think the rest of the family pretends everything is normal until there is a set back. I'm not sure if we are handling all this well. I have a really difficult time with stress eating when my dad is going for his treatments.

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VELVETSAPPHIRE's Photo VELVETSAPPHIRE Posts: 819
10/25/08 5:41 P

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My prayers are with you, your aunt and your family. Sounds like she is really going through the drill, bless her heart.

My husband has gone through all his tests ~ bone scan, CT scan and colonoscopy ~ and now we are just waiting for his surgery date which is Nov 10th at Baylor Dallas. He has opted to have the laproscopic (robotic) surgery so the cancer is completely removed. It will be so good to get that over and done with, as I know sitting here thinking about his cancer is making him understandably antsy.

He left a short time ago to go visit his sisters and their families in Wichita Falls TX so that will keep his mind occuppied for this weekend, especially since he has a year old gr-nephew to entertain him while he is there :)

Prayers to everyone who is going through this with a loved one. Both my parents were smokers and both died of lung cancer that had spread ~ mom died in 87 and dad in 93 ~ so I've been down this road before, although the prostate cancer is something new and different in its own way.

My husband is the 1st in his family to have prostate cancer. His mother died of colon cancer so we were thankful he didn't have any polyps and the doctor said his colon looked very healthy. I've had several men tell me they don't have a history of it in their family ~ just remember, sad as it is, someone has to be first. Rick just turned 50 in Jan and he has said more than once he wished he had started having his PSA checked when he was 40 or 45 ~ shoulda, woulda, coulda... we all know how that goes.

God bless,
Carol

.* ) .*) -::-
(.( ;. Carol *)♥
.* ) .*) -::-
(.( ;.*)♥ *)-::-

I am a polio survivor

Jesus is my Savior and King, the only Messiah I need
ARTMISTRESS78's Photo ARTMISTRESS78 Posts: 2,149
10/25/08 3:16 P

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hi all, i just wanted to check in and see how everyone was doing?

i'm doing okay. i have a lot going on with my job, still not making as many friends as i'd like, but progressing well with my eating habits.

my aunt is on her second round of chemo, now abraxane, which, so far hasn't been as bad as we thought. she had her latest brain MRI on wednesday and they called her back in yesterday morning. turns out that while most of the tumors are either gone or significantly shrunk, one has grown (from a whopping 4 mm to 5.3 mm). it's in the part of the brain that messes with reading and cognitive skills. they suggested a gammaknife treatment where they focus several beams of radiation at the one tumor so that only it is effected by the radiation. we'll be headed to albuquerque in about 3 weeks for this.

the oncologist is happy with my aunt's reaction to her chemo and says she's got great bloodwork. they'll probably do an MRI soon to check her breast tumors. i don't know what all this means exactly, because it seems like no one is expecting anything to go away, just maintain. i could be here with her for a year or even five. we just don't know.

I'll make the most of it, I'm an extraordinary machine. sarashawger.com


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