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CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
7/22/10 9:25 P

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Stress is up as my oldest, daughter recently widowed, has not been feeling well. Some is stress, anxiety and grief I am sure but it is not letting up so i have been running errands for her, took her to the clinic, she has an appt. in 2 weeks but may not be able to wait if it continues. I hope your co worker returns in a better mood. My oldest granddaughter works in a similar situation and has had the loudness aggravate her as well. i am done for 4 days but work is more hectic in the summer so pretty much wore me out by the time i was done. emoticon emoticon

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DARKKAT's Photo DARKKAT Posts: 640
7/21/10 5:26 A

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Office vent for the day: A lady in the next cubicle bay was really loud and whiny today. Every word out of her mouth was negative and complaining. In some ways she was aware, as she keep telling everybody "what a day... but it's not you", but still she inflicted her mood on everyone else. I don't work with her, she's in a totally different cluster, but still she affected me. I felt sorry for the lady that she was working with who tried unsuccesfully to stay away from her coworkers mood. I tried to use the headphones, but she's louder than that. It's funny cause I don't mind and actually enjoy people talking in the background, the problem for me was that her tone and volume kept her right in my face. I'm hoping she goes home tonight and works it out!

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DARKKAT's Photo DARKKAT Posts: 640
6/17/10 4:43 P

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This is a bit unusual for me, but for the past week even my dreams have been stressful. I wake up with horrible thoughts or in the middle of an arguement, fight or something unpleasant. And it's not because these things are currently happening. When I try to go back to sleep the dream keeps recurring. The only positive is that I'm actually sleeping more, so maybe I haven't dreamt in a long time so now I'm disturbed by having dreams? I used to have such fantastic ones - I want them back.

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CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
5/20/10 11:10 P

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Me too Sue. i have just crashed and burned these last 2 weeks, nothing seems to break this plateau I have been stuck on forever. Where is the helicopter to rescue me?? emoticon Need to re-group i guess, it is tough sometimes. emoticon

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SFERENTI's Photo SFERENTI Posts: 1,543
5/19/10 8:01 P

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Today kicked my butt. I am trying so, so hard to stay positive and make good changes in my life, but it's been a long time of willful optimism with no reinforcement from reality.

I'm Sue, and I won't let fear hold me back.


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NANCYLEE46's Photo NANCYLEE46 SparkPoints: (96,448)
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5/14/10 9:00 A

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Georgine,

You sure have had your share of stressors when it comes to dealing with paperwork and insurance companies. They don't get concerned, don't let it get to you either. There is only so much one can do.

Hope all else is going ok. Miss hearing from you.

Nancy emoticon

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CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
5/13/10 3:56 P

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You would think by now i would know better after all the frustration dealing with social services and all the hoops I have been thru but made the mistake of calling an ins. about a bill concerning my husband because i pay the bills and haven't heard a thing about this from them. Well, of course, hubby is not here right now to ok that they talk to me so i waited 20 min to talk to somebody about nothing but more frustration. Like some crook is going to find out how much the bill is and pay it??!! I didn't appreciate the years i lived in the fifties when honest people were not having to be grilled to be sure they were honest. Big brother is protecting us into high Bp and strokes just trying to get into our own affairs. What a sad state of affairs for a so-called democratic country when all are suspected of being dishonest. No longer innocent til proven guilty, now guilty til jumping thru hoops til proven innocent. emoticon Venting won't change that but maybe help bring my bp back down. emoticon

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5/4/10 9:22 A

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I am so upset that my new neoprene shorts ripped this morning. I just don't know what else to do to help me loose the inches quicker. This is the second type of neoprene wear I have tried in 5 months. Its killing me. I am so frustrated about loosing these inches off my tummy. I see the inches coming off everywhere else but where it needs to count. My stomach. I have failed my pt test three times because of my waist. I just don't know what else to do.

CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
4/29/10 9:35 A

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Believe it or not we are just now getting close to getting my mother's MA started!! This has been so frustrating thanks to our gov't and their rules for MA. I signed the last of the papers (I hope) yesterday and if it ever actually gets going i will have even more paperwork, phone calls etc. Thank goodness i have others to help me but it is still something that sits in the back of my mind. So, hopefully it will soon be over. Sheri, hope all is well with you. We are hoping for rain here as are under severe fire restrictions in norhtern Mn. It is cloudy and there are sprinkles starting about an hour away from us and whatever they get we usually get so here's hoping. I have put off things waiting for a rainy day so will feel good to get to it. Have a good day everybody. Georgine emoticon

Edited by: CAPTAINMORGAN2 at: 4/29/2010 (09:37)
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SHERI1969's Photo SHERI1969 SparkPoints: (0)
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4/26/10 9:04 P

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It sounds like your stress is lowering a bit because of this. That is WONDERFUL!!!!!!!!!! I pray it continues to become easier and easier until you can handle things without getting upset. :)

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CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
4/16/10 10:23 A

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Whoopee! FINALLY after weeks and weeks the medical assist. is in progress! I will never accuse social services of being efficient and fast as it was a VERY big weight on my shoulders as my mother's bills started piking up and no money to pay them. Of course, life is still not perfect and never will be but it sure is better now. Hope you are feeling ok now now Sheri. Clear and sunny here but a very cold wind. Have a nice weekend everyone. Georgine emoticon emoticon

Edited by: CAPTAINMORGAN2 at: 4/16/2010 (10:25)
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4/4/10 1:39 A

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There is such a thing called MANIPULATION and another called FALSE GUILT SYNDROME. I suggest you do some googling of the two and learn how to take control so they do not control you. I had to learn and still it is a daily process. Nobody can MAKE YOU FEEL GUILTY...UNLESS YOU ALLOW THEM TO. Do some research and see what you can learn and then let us know that. :)

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CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
3/27/10 11:36 P

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I have just been putting in my stress number so have not vented much. Good thing as lately would have been a long one. I love the weekends because there is less stress and I can relax and get away from the have to dos and lists. My daughter is doing better adjusting to losing her husband, my mother is the same, more trouble with Social Services trying to get Medical assit. again, the funeral director is going to go and talk to these people, long story and the main stress i have had all last week. Hubby is in rehab for 2 weeks already so i can relax about his drinking, it is a nice weekend rain and gloom and all! I hope things improve for all of us and hope we all have a good day tomorrow. Georgine emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LADYMOMA417's Photo LADYMOMA417 Posts: 29
3/22/10 5:04 P

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That really makes sense, and thank you. I'm actually not married, just a single mom, her dad is not in the picture. And she actually helps out quite a bit - un load the dishwasher, put laundry in the dryer, what ever a 2yo can find to do, she does! :o)

It's my step-mom's continual "I don't feel good and I'm sick of doing EVERYTHING for EVERYONE around here." "There has to be time for Peggy. . . " so I try to get EVERYTHING done, so she won't have anything to complain about, but I'm starting to learn the hard way. . . that she will ALWAYS find something. . . it's NEVER good enough, and I guess some people are just like that.

My best friend (just about my only friend in this town) is 7 months pregnant and she has 2 kids of her own, so my ME time is to go over to her house, we let the 3 kiddos loose in the back yard and just talk. I spend 5 or 6 hrs a day there 2-3 days a week. It helps, but then when things get behind at home. . . time to catch-up.

So, I will try to schedule in some more ME time. I really do need to. you're absolutely right. If I don't make sure I'm taken care of, I won't be any good to anyone else, especially my daughter.

emoticon for everyone!

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3/21/10 7:51 P

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LADYMOMA417, You should not HAVE to do all that on your own. If you have a husband anda children old enough to pitch in and do some of the chores around the home that teach them lifeskills, then by all means, get them involved. They may not like it at first, but if you explain that you need their help rather than telling them it is a chore, they may view it as an opportunity to help out mom.
Also, if you don't have children old enough, seek out the help of good friends until things settle down. IF family cannot be there, call on a friend to help you with one or two aspects of what you are doing.
It is a PRIORITY that you make time for YOU. If you have to do what I did at first and actually SCHEDULE ME TIME IN MY DAILY PLANNER, then DO IT. If you don't, you will be good to nobody for a very long time. MAKE TIME or you will burn out fast and hard.

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LADYMOMA417's Photo LADYMOMA417 Posts: 29
3/17/10 12:59 P

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I just can't find a balance between being a full time student, a full time single mom and taking care of parents in ill health.

I CAN'T do this anymore. I am in school all day, I pick up my daughter and try to get in some quality time in the afternoon. I have to start and or cook dinner, and no matter how early I start or how fast I cook, dinner doesn't get done and cleaned up until at least 7. Then I start homework if I have time, or else some more play time with my daughter then baths and then bed.

I just can not seem to ever work in time for ME. It's really wearing me down.

*whew* - ok, that was my vent, I don't feel much better, but it's off my chest.

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12/19/09 12:36 A

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PURPLELABRADOR, how did your annual review go???

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PURPLELABRADOR's Photo PURPLELABRADOR SparkPoints: (36,374)
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12/4/09 2:39 P

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I'm trying not to obsess about my annual review next week. So far I'm doing better today, but I suck at not obsessing.

...the last full measure of devotion...

The will to win is nothing without the will to prepare.


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11/21/09 2:06 A

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I love your name! I'm a Victorian fan, so your name is gorgeous!
Please let me/us know how things go with regards to work and also your Mental Vacation. I take them regularly so I don't get burnt out. :) Best wishes Victoria!

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KRESKA's Photo KRESKA Posts: 493
11/20/09 10:10 A

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Thank you Sheri, for you response. I've decided to look for work at least to pay my bills, even though I practically have no experience and can't really handle a full-time schedule. If things get worse I might as well take that mental vacation.
I like how you call it.
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Victoria

Victoria

"You were once wild here. Don't let them tame you." - Isadora Duncan
"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars!" - Les Brown


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11/20/09 12:12 A

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Princess, there is nothing wrong with having to be in the hospital for psychiatric reasons. I've been in and out of psyche wards for 16+ years now. And now when I feel myself spinning, I take what I call a MENTAL VACATION. Now, mind you, I live alone and can do this. I turn my phones off, eat when I am hungry, only go out if I want to, rest in bed a lot and just take it really easy doing what I want, when I want. But please know that if things are overwhelming, there is nothing wrong with a week in a psyche ward. Contrary to belief, it can do a person wonders. I've not been in one for over 1 1/2 years now, that is how effective they are and the people who work in them. Never be ashamed to ask for professional help, seek some sort of counselling etc. To do so shows strength, not weakness. And if your sig other and mother are thinking hospital, maybe it wouldn't hurt to at least talk with the doctors in the ER about it. Nobody can force you to go and stay unless you've already done something to warrant your being put there against your will, which you have not done.
So seek out some sort of counsel, by a pastor, a counselor, if you go to school a guidance counselor or teacher etc., or call a distress line and talk with somebody anon. Believe me, picking up the phone to dial the number is the hardest part. And I know what it is like: I am supported by disability. My parents had to declare bankruptcy 2 years ago. Large public corporations are asking for bail outs, so you should not be embarassed to be on Welfare. AT least you are trying.

Keep us up to date on what you have decided. emoticon

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KRESKA's Photo KRESKA Posts: 493
11/19/09 9:20 A

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I've been having a very stressful time recently. Applying for disability, going on welfare (as embarrassing as it is), realizing how hard it is going to be to find "my other half", my disagreeable, overbearing mother, doctors who are annoyed with me and need to send me to the hospital (which I despise). It goes on. I was supposed to start a program for a medical office certificate but I have problems reading among other things. What do I do to cope with it all? I should be getting myself to the gym but instead I just sit there and listen to what is on my itunes.

Victoria

"You were once wild here. Don't let them tame you." - Isadora Duncan
"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars!" - Les Brown


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TOASTIE's Photo TOASTIE SparkPoints: (36,653)
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11/16/09 3:41 P

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I belong to a club called Toastmasters, we get together once a week to improve our communication and leadership skills, take turns giving speeches, leading the meeting, etc. During Friday's meeting, we shared what we each do to reduce stress. Ideas were yoga, play with the grandkids, pray, watch a movie that makes us smile, play with the dog, cry in the shower. I am perfecting 'laughing at my teenager while looking like I am paying serious attention'. Some days we just need to put on Groucho Marx glasses and get a little silly. Hopefully some ideas in there for others.

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11/13/09 12:15 A

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Morgan, instead of trying to THINK about the happy and good things, WRITE them down as you think about them. It reinforces the positive thoughts releasing those endorphines you need to pick yourself up.

Sheri

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CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
11/12/09 1:33 P

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trying to do better and not let the sad things in life take over, tryng to remember the things i am grateful for etc. I think i am one of those people that are affected by lack of sunlight and that doesn't help. Nothern Mn. is not known for sunshine tho we have been lucky this Nov., no snow and warmer temps and sunshine so i have been able to deal with things a lot better. I am grateful for this challenge and all of you . emoticon

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11/11/09 10:51 P

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Don't stay away too long Georgine. We don't want to see you get into a depressed slump by not getting the support you need. :)

Sheri

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CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
11/4/09 9:13 P

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Everybody needs a chnage now and then and that is a good thing. i have been thinkng the same as have been going thru my mother's things and it makes me depressed as well. i think i have said enuff about it so think i will also just back out awhile. Some days i can handle it and other days i can't. No use saying the same things all the time either. Take care everyone. Georgine emoticon

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11/4/09 9:29 A

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Karen, I don't know how long you have been part of SparkPeople, but you will notice that even the Coaches here take a week off now and then. It's good to take a break because when you do come back, you are fresh, optimistic and excited to be back with like-minded healthy friends.
No need to apologize for the stress in my life. Stress in life is inevitable. What is important is how we deal with it and that we are in control of it not the other way around. So SparkBreaks are good. I take one about 2-3 times/year for about a week...if I can stay away that long :)

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CHANGES4KAREN's Photo CHANGES4KAREN Posts: 493
11/2/09 10:40 P

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Stress has been mounting out here. I am seeking help from my land based support group right now and professional help. I also want to take time for hobbies and exercise and quiet time. I am cutting out things and getting help with simple things as well. I hate to say this but I am taking a Spark Break. I haven't been active on my teams in about a week. And I have been having panic attacks. I am sorry your stress Sheri and others. I know I haven't been here for my teammates. Life has been a little difficult. I am surviving though and with help I will continue on and hopefully not too long from now I will be back. Wishing you better days. Hoping that things improve for all of us. Hang in there guys. Love and care, Karen
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~Karen Ellen~

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*As Lao Tsu has said*, "A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step."


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11/2/09 10:19 P

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Thank you for the support; it's much appreciated. Today was just as hard. My mom and dad are frustrated over the lack of care I'm to be getting from the place that took over where they could live their life with me as a 40 year old adult. Well, today it all came down the tubes and my mom called, yelled at me, had to go becuase the laundry room was waiting. I called the crisis line to vent it out, she called back...typical scenario. So now they don't want to talk about it, but I'm left to deal with the place that is supposed to be helping me etc. Yeah, kind of a high stress day. :) Thanks again for your support.

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TOASTIE's Photo TOASTIE SparkPoints: (36,653)
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11/1/09 8:08 A

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Wow, Sheri, you had a rough week - hope November is better for you. Sorry to hear about your cat. And pneumonia -- between that and your bad back, you probably have to be very creative to find exercises that you can do. I have leg problems, and it's a fine line between doing enough and doing too much.

Toastie.

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10/30/09 10:13 A

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Thank you for your support. The reason I say no more is because of my bad chronic back conditions. It may come to one day where I cannot bend down to feed a cat or clean its litter box. So why put the cat in jeopardy? :)

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CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
10/30/09 9:59 A

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good morning Sheri, I am sorry you had to put your cat down. As you said, you had to do what was best for Sammy but it is a hard decision to make. i have had to do it too many times in the past for my beloved dogs. I always say no more dogs but here i am with 2 again. It is especailly bad to have to do when you yourself don't feel well. I wish you a speedy recovery from illness, Take good care of yourself and hope the prednisone works quickly. emoticon

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10/30/09 12:59 A

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I'm sorry you didn't get good news. It's always a let down.
I had to put my cat Sammy, 2 1/2 years old, to sleep on Wednesday. He got sick with Fatty Liver again and that comes from not eating, ironically. So I won't ever have a cat again. I lost one in 2008 and now Sammy in 2009. No more. He was my first male cat and the last cat I'll ever adopt.
Then I went to the ER and still have pneumonia, 3rd week, two anti-biotics and prednisone, now just a "whopping dose of prednisone," in the doctor's words. 25 days of it hopefully will cure it. I get it about 8 times/winter so you can understand if I say I hate winter, especially here in Canada.

Sheri

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CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
10/26/09 9:38 P

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Nurse called to say my mom should see the doctor. Plus is i can wheel her to the clinic from her apt house. Bummer was waiting for over and hour to hear her doctor say there is nothing more he can do, have to let the med work. By then my stress level was peaking as had been awake(don't know why) since 1 am , worked my shift and had been ready to crash when i had to deal with this. So it goes. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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10/26/09 12:56 A

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When you get stressed and things are out of order, smile and say, "WHAT ABOUT BOB? BABY STEPS!"

Sheri :P

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CHANGES4KAREN's Photo CHANGES4KAREN Posts: 493
10/24/09 2:47 P

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First things first and there are only so many things that can be done in one day, one hour, one minute...

~Karen Ellen~

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*As Lao Tsu has said*, "A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step."


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10/24/09 9:30 A

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Remember to prioritize. Write down everything you need to do putting the most important...like going to work/school at the top of the list and little things like cleaning out the fridge for a day you have more time etc. Make a list and prioritize from numbers 1-whatever. The number 1 is the most important and the highest number can wait until later. Do that and your stress level will lower.

Sheri

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CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
10/23/09 10:27 P

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Most of the stress is also trying to get things done before i go back to work. all else is staus quo for now. emoticon

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CHANGES4KAREN's Photo CHANGES4KAREN Posts: 493
10/23/09 9:43 P

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I am stressed by a lot to do.

~Karen Ellen~

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*As Lao Tsu has said*, "A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step."


CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
10/20/09 5:58 P

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Too tired to feel stressed. Spent the early morning hours in the emergency room, with my mom, fell out of bed and needed an elbow repair,I went to work til noon and back up for her ultra sound as they suspected a blood clot from her hip surgery and confirmed it. Brought her back to where she lives and fed her breakfast, she was ready for bed, hubby and I went out for lunch as i missed both bkfs. and lunch, and now will lie down awhile. We too worry about the income as we are retirement age but I am too tired to worry about it now. Getting exercise, baths and reading help a lot to offset worries. There has to be enjoyment in life too and a good mystery with the bath, candles, maybe a wine, saves those moments for relaxation. We just found out a lot of our retirement has gone with this lousy economy, nithing we can do but hope it recovers. I think i am so tired i am babbling too much. hang in there and enjoy fun things and family. emoticon

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NEED2LOSE45's Photo NEED2LOSE45 Posts: 352
10/19/09 11:02 P

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My stressor today is that my daughter has the flu and my husband thinks he has it so he stayed home as well today. Been looking for a job since February. At first it was great being home though I still actively looked. Summer home with my daughter was wonderful. But now all the kids birthdays and christmas are coming and I have no idea...Unemployment only buys a few groceries.
That is my stress...to relieve it I read get on the stationary bike and last but not least soak in a hot tub and let the worries float away. Til I get out anyway.

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10/19/09 5:11 P

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hey CaptainMorgan - that was a big help to me to count up how many adults there are who could be worrying about my dad and step-mom instead of me -- and I am going to quit feeling quite so overwhelmed and frustrated that I can't find a way to do more.

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CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
10/19/09 4:30 P

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Yes, i have found many contacts where I can get more help as have had to find help so she could stay at home as long as possible so i will look for help if this keeps on. I brought her warm cape up for her so we can use it as well as one of her afghans so i will take care of it once again. The thing is she doesn't understand anymore that she has to sit and wait and the last clinic visit was just awful. As you know they don't hurry to come in and see the patient right away and she doesn't understand why she has to wait there. You should be able to get help for your parents also. My mother didn't want anyone either but when she heard she would have to leave her home if she didn't she changed her mind. She finally fell and is nearly blind so I had to move her, doctor's orders. I will manage. i have 2 daughters here but try not to call them away from their jobs and families as much as possible. Will let you know how this time works out. Georgine

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10/19/09 4:15 P

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hi - it's clouding up here, too, but no rain yet -- I should go mow one last time.

The good news is that you have been handling all your mom's trips to the doctor -- they don't sound like fun, but you've done it, you're doing it, and you'll be able to do it, one trip at a time!

Not sure whether there are alternatives for you, ie, is there a senior health services that can help with the transport, or give her a new warm quilt to wrap up in, or something? I've found calling the phone number '211' has answers when I am at my wits end and don't know where to turn. And the women at my church love to make quilts.

Nope, no family near my dad and step-mom. And at age 91, they don't have a lot of friends left, and have too much pride to use any helpful agencies in town (but when I go home in a couple weeks, I'm going to poke around at senior center to see what I can learn). If they are still around in 2 years when my youngest goes off to college, I'll move closer, as I could do my job remotely, and my siblings cannot.

Seems so sad and lonely to get older. And they don't want to move to where any of us 5 adult children (or 8 adult grandchildren or 2 adult great-grandchildren) live.

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CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
10/19/09 2:40 P

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Just got home from work and it is cold and drizzling, no sunshine. Then I find an email from the nurse where my mother lives and they want me to take her to the doctor. The last time i took her i said "never again" as it was a miserable 45 minutes trying to get her to sit down and wait. It has been a long long haul thru the years. I will call the clinic and see what they think as also would rather not take her out in this miserable weather. She hates being cold tho the clinic and hospital are not far from where she lives. She has developed swelling in her lower legs and the diuretic isn't helping. Sometimes i just want to be left alone but this is my never ending story. I am not sure she even knows me anymore, so heartbreaking watching her go downhill more and more. Nothing I can do but see that she is cared for and comfortable. Do you have family near your dad? I wouldn't like to be that far away either but we go where we need to go. As I had to sell her house evrything from her house is at mine now so have my hands full trying to go thru it as well as work etc. Would be easier if i were younger I am sure but i have no choice there either. Thank you for the thoughts, i used to just flip out every time something to do with her affairs came up because it has been totally overwhelming many times but now i just kind of feel deflated. Oh well, will do what i have to do once again. Hope you are having a warm sunny day, We have had this wet, windy, cold weather for days now except for yesterday. emoticon

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10/19/09 10:56 A

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Ah, CaptainMorgan -- a new baby coming -- how exciting! Definitely sounds like you needed the relief of coming in here and venting to us. Hopefully the sun is shining brightly on you today. Aging parents are a challenge - my dad turns 91 in a couple weeks, and, oh man, he was confused on the phone yesterday. I believe I woke him up, and maybe his hearing aid wasn't working -- but it sure wasn't much of a conversation. He's 300 miles away, so really hard for me to take care of him.

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10/16/09 11:23 P

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I think i did a lot of venting in the stress screen, should have done this in reverse. As it is the weekend and my 4 days off, things are easier and more relaxed. As I said in the other screen, am waiting for my first great grand child (boy) and waiting to hear if my mother is getting better. Nothing i can do about either so will relax and enjoy my days off as best i can. have a nice weekend everyone. emoticon

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CHANGES4KAREN's Photo CHANGES4KAREN Posts: 493
10/16/09 7:39 P

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emoticon

Take care!

~Karen Ellen~

I AM INSPIRED BY THE COURAGE, GRACE, AND STAMINA OF THOSE AROUND ME HERE AT SPARK PEOPLE.


*As Lao Tsu has said*, "A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step."


CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
10/15/09 9:40 A

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first thing this morning i turn on the computer and have a message from the nurse to take my mother to the clinic today, my first day off. It is no small feat to move her these days and I have said i do not want to transport her anymore. Now have another email they will use medication first to see if it helps. I have been having a difficult time coping with her and my husband's clinic/ hospital visits that have been ongoing for years so when i see yet again I may have to deal with it my spirits just sink. i have told them in the emergency room to put my name on my chair. It is one thing to be a caretaker which is not easy but when it goes on for years and years it tends to drag you down in your own life. Well, have started walking my dogs and keeping up in here with my diet and using all the help i can find so once again, i will do what I have to do and not let it take me down. As i am not young anymore either, i yearn for a more peaceful life as i age. Oh well, it is what is is for now. emoticon

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CHANGES4KAREN's Photo CHANGES4KAREN Posts: 493
10/15/09 1:23 A

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I agree. Great idea! Very true, as well.

emoticon emoticon emoticon

~Karen Ellen~

I AM INSPIRED BY THE COURAGE, GRACE, AND STAMINA OF THOSE AROUND ME HERE AT SPARK PEOPLE.


*As Lao Tsu has said*, "A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step."


CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
10/14/09 3:53 P

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good advice for us all. i get in trouble sometimes for reacting and not thinking when i am busy or stressed. really need that advice when on the phone in those menus and /or waiting because i am so valuable as if my time is not. Hope you ar having a good day today Sheri, and everyone else too. emoticon

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10/14/09 1:59 A

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A good thing to post on your computer, in your car...anywhere:

STOP

THINK

then React.

Sheri

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CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
10/12/09 10:40 P

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More problems with my mom's health, no answer yet but I am coping much better. Walking outside again has helped so much as well as keeping up in sparks even tho i get behind sometimes. Thanx again sheri for keeping us going as well as yourself. emoticon emoticon

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10/12/09 1:40 A

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Karen, thank you for that. I fully agree that God will not take me into anything that together HE and I cannot handle and get through with few or no scars, so to speak. :)

Sheri

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CHANGES4KAREN's Photo CHANGES4KAREN Posts: 493
10/11/09 11:02 A

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There are days when I am so weak I use the walker around the house but the cane outdoors if I go out. I am fortunate it only runs in spells some longer than others. I imagine as time goes along that eventually I may need a scooter down the road, however, right now I do what I can when I can. So, I can sort of relate even though not entirely.


Sheri, in general, your positive attitude and motivation to take care of yourself and show others the way has been a true inspiration in my life. So, I believe that whatever happens you will have the strength to overcome your difficulties throughout whatever they may be.

I wish you all the best and I hope that you can hang to your hope throughout all through your great spiritual strength and values!

With love & respect, Karen

~Karen Ellen~

I AM INSPIRED BY THE COURAGE, GRACE, AND STAMINA OF THOSE AROUND ME HERE AT SPARK PEOPLE.


*As Lao Tsu has said*, "A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step."


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9/28/09 9:18 P

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SFERENTI, I am a believer and I believe that without God in my life, things would be much worse. I believe there is a reason this is happening and in the saying that If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it, and that this too shall pass...in one way or another.

I'm sorry your friend cancelled at the last minute. Was there a reason? Perhaps an emergency came up. It might not hurt to call and talk to him/her and see if everything is okay. I know I've had to cancel plans at the last minute only because something important came up.
I am sorry you are sad, but try to not let it ruin your entire day. :)

Sheri

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9/28/09 9:56 A

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Sheri, it sounds like that trip to the doctor took a lot of bravery. And you did it! I suffered for years with back pain (nothing as intense as yours though) and it was actually one of my 2009 resolutions to try to heal it, and it has made a HUGE difference in my life. I hope you are able to find some relief as well.

NITA-BERRY, good luck with the alone time. I've started getting up an hour early (oy!) to have the house to myself and work on a project I was never finding time for. It's really contributing to my feeling grounded and accomplished for the rest of the day. My challenge now is going to bed an hour early so I don't lose a full night sleep, as I have been.

I'm not really stressed today, but blue. Last night a friend canceled plans we had together at the last minute. I was really looking forward to our time together, as this friend has been really busy and I've been missing our times together. We have a solid enough friendship that we know we CAN do things like cancel at the last minute--and I've done similar things myself. Still, I'm just feeling a little sad and neglected this morning.
emoticon

I'm Sue, and I won't let fear hold me back.


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9/26/09 2:57 A

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I saw my doctor Friday and found that I have Chronic Mechancial Back Pain caused by Sciadica. The pain cannot be treated, only help me to be made comfortable.
He has given me a prescription to take to ODSP for a Wheeled Walker. I cannot bend, lift, sit, stand, etc., for any longer than 5 mins at a time without chronic pain.
I did ask my most fearful question...If I would end up in a wheelchair and he said he didn't see that happening and I took a very long sigh of relief!!!!!!!!
He gave me two shots of something in my lower back...not cortisone but something different. It is like freezing that part of the back and the freezing lasting for 2 weeks so the pain is either non-existent or minimal. I went to bed at roughly 8pm last night and got up around 2am for a drink and thought I'd check the email. That's the longest sleep I have had in about 3 weeks and NOOOO nightmares.
So my prayer request now is that I find favour with ODSP to have them cover the cost of the walker so I can get out and walk...I love to walk and it is the only way I can work at losing weight now. Oh, I do have an exercise video for people who are in wheelchairs so I asked about that and he said I could try it so long as it did not strain my back.

Thanks gang,
Sheri

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CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
9/25/09 7:50 A

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Hope things go well for you with your doctor Sheri. i have a back problem from years ago, I tried to move my couch and it didn't move but my back did. It was a sciatic thing and very painful so I can only imagine what you are dealing with. I go to the chiropractor regulary and that keeps me going. Nice to hear from you again, hope relief comes for you soon. Will be thinking of you. emoticon

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9/25/09 2:35 A

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I apologize for my long absence, but I have been dealing with a great deal of pain with the 6 herniated discs and degenerative disc disease. As well, I've been undergoing tests for these. However, while I might not have been here, I AM working on some wonderful items to post to you. Hopefully by next week, I will be back on track. I see my doctor later today...Friday for results etc.

Love to all,
Sheri

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NITA-BERRY's Photo NITA-BERRY Posts: 1,588
9/22/09 12:15 P

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Wow. I know I'm stressed. But then I read this whole blog this morning. My life is no different then anyone else's. I don't usually take time to blog because I'm so busy. I'm taking TODAY off. I crashed last night. I have been handling the stress of being the new Chair of a Volunteer committee pretty good I thought. Then I crashed last night after the meeting. Not good.

I'm taking my own advice now (and my hubby's); SCHEDULE time in the day for me--at least 1 hour, or I won't survive. Migraines are just not fun. Gotta go back and get some more shut-eye before the kids come home.

~ My life may not always be what I want, but my attitude will make all the difference

~ The Best kind of Friend is the one you could sit on a porch with, never say a word, & walk away feeling like that was the best conversation you've had


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CAPTAINMORGAN2's Photo CAPTAINMORGAN2 Posts: 17,494
9/20/09 11:03 P

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just got back from the emergency room where they decided to keep my husband over nite for observation because well, lets say he has a blood problem. also admitted to the doctor he has been drinking which since he has been told he will die if he drinks again just , well, suffice it to say between him and my aging mother i am so glad to be back home with my dogs and be alone. There is a limit to what a person can handle and both of these situations have been ongoing for years and years. So, ordinarily i would say my stress is well over 10 but as i am alone, I feel relief just now. Physically i think i am doing fine but mentally, ?? Every time I think he has licked the drinking i get shot down, my mother can't help her situation but the stress falls to me also. Just keep hoping I can keep mind and body together to get to a point where i can enjoy life with none of that. So, that is where i am tonite.

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CHANGES4KAREN's Photo CHANGES4KAREN Posts: 493
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It will be good to know what happens with them. I see the doctor tomorrow. I have to finish getting my papers ready. It is a big appointment. I may be procrastinating because I am nervous about it. Or maybe I just procrastinate. And I have a therapy appointment with mental health in the morning. I am feeling like I really need both appointments desperately. I just feel like the time couldn't be more right.

~Karen Ellen~

I AM INSPIRED BY THE COURAGE, GRACE, AND STAMINA OF THOSE AROUND ME HERE AT SPARK PEOPLE.


*As Lao Tsu has said*, "A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step."


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9/19/09 12:39 A

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The tests went, but I don't find out results until the 25th! :)

Sheri

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9/14/09 9:09 P

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Hope the tests go well for you or at least provide the information you need to provide proper care for your back. Take care of yourself Sheri!

~Karen Ellen~

I AM INSPIRED BY THE COURAGE, GRACE, AND STAMINA OF THOSE AROUND ME HERE AT SPARK PEOPLE.


*As Lao Tsu has said*, "A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step."


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Hey gang, despite being away for about 2 weeks, and despite some rough times, sounds like you are all doing well!
I am back after many doctor tests on my back and then recovering from that, as well as catching up on home chores. I sitll don't know what my limits will be but I will find out on Sept 25.
It's good to be back AND see you all doing so well!

Sheri

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9/9/09 5:42 P

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PS, sorry I did not edit, hit post before i remembered. emoticon

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My stress goes up and down with my mother's affairs that include me. Finally have most of her things out of the house as we close on the sale the 15th and I had let the buyer move in on the 1st as she had no place to live in between. i had to work at the houas around her work schedule but that worked well. Now have a dunpster here and amd sifitng thru it all again. When the house closes my mother will get some of the money so that will stop her medical assist. which freaked me out at first as do not want to go thru all that piece by piece again. Somehow i have made myself take it one day at a time and deal with each issue as they come hoping not too many come at once. My mother has recovered from her hip surgery and i will be bringing her home tomorrow to her assist. living apt. There have been conflicts with the powers that be making appts for me with out even cionsulting me but i stood my grounf as to when or if i could make it. they act as if I am just sitting here with nothing on my plate. Weeks ago i would have flipped out over it but had to take hold before i made myself sick. Some things just can't be done. I still feel some stress over things but am handling them fairly well, no crying, screaming, and drinking taking it day by day doing what i can as well as i can. It looks like ai am in for a long haul so had to come to grips with things. Still need to get out and walk my dogs, I make sure i get some reading time and computer time, have to do things I enjoy to offset the stress too. I don't know if this helps anyone. Also, sometimes you just have to tell people you can't do as much as you had offered because you are not well or am over your head and/or ask for help. I know how miserable I was before and it is no healthy way to live, sometimes you just have to say no. Keep well everybody

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9/9/09 12:34 P

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Hi K-Wren -- good luck at the doctor appointment today! Looks like you are giving yourself good advice to do what means the most, and pass on committing to things that add stress or financial woes. Your friends and supporters will understand if you gracefully back out of some commitments or decline future ones (and if they don't understand, guess that helps define who is really your friend and supporter). If I was involved, I'd want you to ask for help as soon as possible for two reasons -- one is to lessen your stress, and the other is so I can more easily help you without being right up against the deadlines. Hang in there!

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9/9/09 12:58 A

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I'm stressed and I am having trouble going to bed because I don't want to face tomorrow. I have a big doctor's appointment. My recovery support group and a lot of things I should be doing for a wedding shower and some projects I'd promised to do. I feel pressured and I don't know how I am going to get everything done. I am afraid I have overcommitted and I feel nervous about it all. I have been sick and my energy is still a little weak though gaining. So, with all this coming on and the wedding of my friend next week, I am ready to head for the hills. My brain just doesn't want to handle the stress. I guess I can only do one thing at a time and I have to learn not to over commit and say yes when I am pressured to do things that might be stressful for me. Some of these things are stressful financially and also draining emotionally with the people pressure involved. I think I need to find a easier way to live. I have gotten too involved in too many things that I have no business being involved in with my depression and physical issues. If I want to be happy, I had better reconsider the commitments which I make in the future instead of leaping into them headlong for the wrong reasons. It is too easy to start them and much harder to finish them. And when I am home, alone, all by myself, and I have ten or twenty things stacked up to do and there is all I can do to take care of myself, then I know that my ego is way out of check and I want to do more than I can realistically achieve. Maybe it is time to get my priorities in order and settle down into the simple life and just take it easy. I always have these big ideas and then I don't have the follow through for one reason or the other. I am so tired and I just get sick or anxious or overwhelmed. And now, I must do a few things which people have expected me to complete. Maybe I can tone down what I am doing to a certain degree. I certainly would rather get them done than not at all. These next two weeks are going to be hard.

~Karen Ellen~

I AM INSPIRED BY THE COURAGE, GRACE, AND STAMINA OF THOSE AROUND ME HERE AT SPARK PEOPLE.


*As Lao Tsu has said*, "A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step."


TOASTIE's Photo TOASTIE SparkPoints: (36,653)
Fitness Minutes: (15)
Posts: 3,031
9/8/09 8:08 A

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Hi - just checking in - hope you are feeling better this week. Treat yourself well - you are worth it!

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KRESKA's Photo KRESKA Posts: 493
9/2/09 6:22 A

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Thank you Toastie for your words of encouragement. It is what I need on bad days. Nevertheless I think you are right, I should talk to my doctor about my reoccurring 'sad time' and change my routine around, especially in the evening.
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Victoria

Victoria

"You were once wild here. Don't let them tame you." - Isadora Duncan
"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars!" - Les Brown


 current weight: 169.0 
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TOASTIE's Photo TOASTIE SparkPoints: (36,653)
Fitness Minutes: (15)
Posts: 3,031
9/1/09 4:40 P

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Ah, Victoria. Bad days do happen. Look at you -- you have lost over 13 pounds. You have quit smoking. You have made a great choice to get new supportive friends in sparkpeople. I find it is really hard to quit doing something -- much easier to start to do something else -- and pretty soon there is no room in my life for the old thing. So, find something else to spend time on. Go do some volunteer work (around here the United Way knows about tons of opportunities). Go for a walk. Swing on a swing. Add some fun to your life that also adds exercise or purpose. 'shop' in the library. Um, do you need a doctor to help with depression? Nothing to be ashamed of -- if you can get help to get back up on your feet, get it. Also here - can call the phone number 211 and ask for help with finances. Hang in there. I'm routing for you.

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