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ATRANSFORMATION's Photo ATRANSFORMATION Posts: 9,761
12/11/14 4:05 P

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This past year and a half has been extraordinarily difficult for me...but at the same time, the kindness I've experienced has countered the pain...

I took a terrible fall on my tile kitchen floor the week before thanksgiving. I landed on my tailbone, and was sure I'd broken it. Did not go to the doc, because I know other than ice, analgesics, and staying down...time is all it will take to heal it. So I have pretty much done just that. Cleared two weeks off the calendar, and pretty much laid on the couch, because sitting and walking was just too painful.

In yet another "down time" I have experienced kindness that was SO unexpected. Neighbors fed me. My son came down and put up my tree, helped with minor "fix-its" around the house, the neighbor kid takes out my trash, and so on...

With the "pineapple express" headed our way, meaning lots of rain for us, I had concern about my walkway which floods with heavy rains. Our city was giving away sand bags, so I went to get some....but they were do it yourself. Shovels, bags, and a pile of sand was there. I had NO idea how I was going to fill them and get them into the car. But a young man offered to help me. He said he'd come down to help his elderly neighbor in the morning and realized there were a LOT of people who needed help, so he'd been there all day. After we filled, and he carried, a car full of sandbags, he refused to take any kind of a tip. "A hug will do...."

Yesterday, my neighbor's son, who helped me get everything ready for my Thanksgiving meal when I was injured, unloaded and placed the sandbags where needed. He put a leaf in the dining room table, carried in chairs from the garage and set them up, hauled the Christmas boxes to the garage...all in prep for my book club gathering last night. I went to my purse to pay him (I have always paid him for his work...) and he totally refused. Said he has a job now, and didn't need them money. He again said he'd take a Christmas hug as payment.

So...is my faith in the upcoming generation renewed? Absolutely. These young men (early 20's) will be husbands, fathers and/or ??? and will be great at what they do. Their willingness to help showed me who they really are. And blessed me beyond belief!

Spread the joy!

~~~Kathy~~~

Scales lie. Pants don't lie.
~~~

If the only prayer you ever say is "thank you" that shall suffice. ~~~~~~ Meister Eckhart


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ATRANSFORMATION's Photo ATRANSFORMATION Posts: 9,761
10/21/14 2:32 P

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I was in a long line at the pharmacy yesterday...picking up meds for my emergency travel kit. The man a few people in front of me was furious. He'd evidently been waiting for a while, and his prescription wasn't yet ready. He was tearing into the tech and venting all his rage on her.

She, in her kindness, just smiled at him, let him rant, and then told him she was going to call him as soon as they were ready, and let him come to the front of the line...

The next person said something to her, when they approached the window. She said, "Aw, he wasn't so bad...I totally understand." Nothing else. I thought to myself how kind she was! To take it all, let it roll off of her, and not complain to the next person that mentioned it. Inspiring.

~~~Kathy~~~

Scales lie. Pants don't lie.
~~~

If the only prayer you ever say is "thank you" that shall suffice. ~~~~~~ Meister Eckhart


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ATRANSFORMATION's Photo ATRANSFORMATION Posts: 9,761
10/20/14 2:16 P

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I'm not sure this is the right place to share this....but it's as good as anywhere else. Just to let people know what a KIND doctor I have. I've been going to him since I first got married and got on my hubby's insurance plan. Now that I think about it, he must have been just out of med school!

When I travel, I bring along my emergency medical bag. Anything you need for pain, nausea, constipation, diarrhea, allergies, colds, etc. He is KIND enough to write prescriptions for the pain pills (and believe me, I needed them when I broke my ankle in Vietnam!) and antibiotics, knowing I will only take them when absolutely necessary. Well, the ones in my "kit" have long since expired, so when I asked him to renew, he did....and then I asked him if he's like me to bring back anything from Israel.

Now, understand, he is Jewish. And I did not expect a reply like I got. It literally took my breath away. But he told me what he wanted.

"Peace"

That was it. Whew.

~~~Kathy~~~

Scales lie. Pants don't lie.
~~~

If the only prayer you ever say is "thank you" that shall suffice. ~~~~~~ Meister Eckhart


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MTRACHEL's Photo MTRACHEL Posts: 1,454
10/18/14 10:38 P

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Kathy, we have all kinds of teachers!

Last night we celebrated our 25th anniversary with 25 friends at a Thai Restaurant in Missoula, MT (a rare treat in Montana). The lovely family runs the business and they catered an amazing meal. After everyone had eaten, the dear Thai grandmother came out and said "I cook more for you?" A surprise offer of generosity and kindness. I was really touched.

Every day, think as you wake up, today I am fortunate to be alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it. I am going to use all my energies to develop myself, to expand my heart out to others; to achieve enlightenment for the benefit of all beings. I am going to have kind thoughts towards others, I am not going to get angry or think badly about others. I am going to benefit others as much as I can."
-- H.H. the Dalai Lama
Mountain time


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ATRANSFORMATION's Photo ATRANSFORMATION Posts: 9,761
10/15/14 10:14 P

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Well, this one is a lesson in kindness...how it brought an awareness to mind...that even with our good intents, we miss opportunities to spread kindness to others.

Yesterday, after six days of care giving and a long travel day, I finally got to my car in the airport parking lot. A man came up to me, holding jumper cables. Said he'd gotten back to his car, only to find a dead battery. He asked if I could give him a jump.My response? NO, I can't, I'm late.... not even a good excuse. It was based on fear of what our society has crammed into our brains. It was broad daylight. The shuttles were going by every 5-10 minutes. He was dressed reasonably well, and I still said no. As I loaded my luggage into the car, I asked myself why did I turn down that chance to be nice to someone...out of fear. I decided to help him after all....and drove toward the exit, some other man had stopped, said yes, and was allowing the guy to hook the cables to his battery. They were laughing, and I overheard the man say, no thanks needed, I've been in that situation before. I thought to myself, how kind he was and what a jerk I was for turning down this chance.

I sped up, to make it look like my lie was the truth...I really didn't have to be anywhere. And then, felt it....slammed in the face. WHAT is wrong with helping someone at a time like that. I had my cell phone. I was in a public place. There were people around. He wasn't homeless, asking for money. No evidence of drugs, alcohol, or mental illness. Just a regular guy needing help.

I blew it. But at least someone else didn't.

Kindness still conquers fear.

~~~Kathy~~~

Scales lie. Pants don't lie.
~~~

If the only prayer you ever say is "thank you" that shall suffice. ~~~~~~ Meister Eckhart


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GIRLINBRAZIL's Photo GIRLINBRAZIL Posts: 6,878
10/13/14 5:23 P

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Saturday I was privileged to participate in a community care event of the local church we are attending while on furlough in the USA. Baby items were given away to needy families. The event was held at a local park frequented by at risk teens. It was like a huge family picnic with free hot dogs and lemonade, live music, and games. Each person that received baby gifts were also asked if there were other needs of which the church could help or pray with. It was an incredible day of giving, sharing and participating in our local neighborhood. I had the joy of giving away the last baby blanket - one I had made.



Edited by: GIRLINBRAZIL at: 10/14/2014 (19:20)
“Fear arises when we imagine that everything depends on us.” E. Elliot


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NONIE_C's Photo NONIE_C Posts: 3,344
10/10/14 8:00 P

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I love this new practice of attention to and awareness of kindness that we enact and encounter.
LOVE IT emoticon

*yesterday, I stopped and patiently waited as a city worker wandered in the middle of the street reading a document. rather than honk and startle him, I waited until he looked up and just smiled at him.

*two acquaintances reached out just to see how I was doing. showing care and concern is such a wonderful kindness!

*my CPA gave me a generous discount on my tax prep, which is very helpful right now...an unexpected and much appreciated act of kindness.

~*~ Nicole ~*~

Wishing you some sort of success every day, and the ability to always see your blessings.


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ATRANSFORMATION's Photo ATRANSFORMATION Posts: 9,761
10/8/14 1:54 A

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I have to acknowledge the kindness that is shared in the neighborhood I live in... SO many little things we all do for each other.
* Watching the dogs for those who are traveling
* My neighbor's son takes me trash cans out every week (He knows dragging them down the driveway plays havoc on my knees)
* Bringing meals to those in need (right now, one neighbor just brought her mom home on hospice and she will probably only last a few more days. Cooking is the last thing she needs to worry about)
* Texting each other when at Costco (I'm on a Costco run, anyone need anything?)
* And tonight, one of them came with me, in the dark to help me look for my keys...




~~~Kathy~~~

Scales lie. Pants don't lie.
~~~

If the only prayer you ever say is "thank you" that shall suffice. ~~~~~~ Meister Eckhart


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MTRACHEL's Photo MTRACHEL Posts: 1,454
10/7/14 11:56 P

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what a lovely practice! Thank you all for sharing! This thread really helps me remember my favorite quote of late...Be kind whenever possible, it is always possible...Dalai Lama

It also reminds me of how powerful even the smallest interaction can be when it contains kindness.

love and eaters to each of you~



Every day, think as you wake up, today I am fortunate to be alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it. I am going to use all my energies to develop myself, to expand my heart out to others; to achieve enlightenment for the benefit of all beings. I am going to have kind thoughts towards others, I am not going to get angry or think badly about others. I am going to benefit others as much as I can."
-- H.H. the Dalai Lama
Mountain time


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ATRANSFORMATION's Photo ATRANSFORMATION Posts: 9,761
10/5/14 11:03 P

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Stephanie....some of the greatest acts of kindness I experienced after losing my husband came from young people. Gave me such hope for the upcoming generation. So many wonderful 30 year old men out there!

And today, I saw a lot of them....

The kindness they showed, reaching out to me, and to my step daughter's mom.

Also, I am truly appreciating the notes that people have sent me this week. The texts (one was funny today...my thoughts and EATERS are with you today...gotta love auto correct for PRAYERS!), the phone calls, and the emails.SO much kindness. I am in awe.

~~~Kathy~~~

Scales lie. Pants don't lie.
~~~

If the only prayer you ever say is "thank you" that shall suffice. ~~~~~~ Meister Eckhart


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SLASALLE's Photo SLASALLE SparkPoints: (282,238)
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10/5/14 9:29 A

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I have a favorite coffeehouse/tea house that I go to that is on my way to and from work. I've gone there for several years now and have seen lots of staff come and go. I remain friends with some of the staff who have moved on.

The baristas who work there are very kind-hearted people!! While Beth was in hospice, my good friend (who turned me on to this place) was bringing me my hot chai tea with honey and almond milk up to hospice nearly every day. The staff would often not let her pay for my teas.

They logged on to CaringBridge while Beth was in hospice and sent a message to her (she went there too for her coffee)!

They often give me little goodies (my favorite chocolate zucchini bread at night that they would have to throw away anyway) just to show their appreciation.

One of the baristas (male) made me a container of homemade chicken noodle soup with ginger and cilantro and kept it in the fridge until the next time I came in after Beth died. We now often share soup recipes and soup samples back and forth.

Their many kindnesses - before, during and after - through this very difficult year have been a highlight for me of warmth and caring. They are all considerably younger than me but we have special friendships!

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ATRANSFORMATION's Photo ATRANSFORMATION Posts: 9,761
10/4/14 6:31 P

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So many little things...but day after day, they really add up.

Yesterday, I had several checks to deposit, and some other banking business to tend to. The bank was SO busy (Friday afternoon) and the regular employees were no where to be seen. A young, rather nervous young man approached, and asked if he could help me. When I explained what I needed, he said it was only his fourth day, and he would be unable to help me, but he would find someone who could. He checked back every few minutes, offered to deposit my checks so I didn't have to wait in line, and brought me a glass of water. He was SO sweet. SO kind. And doing his job so well!

When I was finished, I spilled my purse as I got up, and he jumped to his knees and helped me pick up all the "junk" that I had in the big purse! Another kind gesture that really helped an old lady with bad knees!

~~~Kathy~~~

Scales lie. Pants don't lie.
~~~

If the only prayer you ever say is "thank you" that shall suffice. ~~~~~~ Meister Eckhart


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TAMINGDRAGONS's Photo TAMINGDRAGONS Posts: 11,801
10/4/14 11:00 A

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What a blessing to read about these acts of kindness! I rarely speak of mine to others because they are so personal. I greatly enjoy giving encouragement to my friends on Facebook and do that whenever I can. I know that many are encouraged knowing that I pray for them esp. at those times when they feel alone and discouraged.

Last week, I was deeply grateful when I shared a special desire with my husband and he reacted positively (kindly). A bit of backdrop: before our son died, my husband insisted we skip our normally scheduled furlough after 4 years on the field. Our oldest was living on his own in the states and planned to visit us at the close of the 1999. When our son died at the end of 1999, I realized that because we had not taken our furlough, we did not have a family picture, which was usually taken when we were in the states. So, we had not taken a family photo in over five years! It made me angry and eventually I let it rest.

Last week, I heard that an artist friend was in town. I wondered how long and if he would be interested in helping me see a wish to fulfillment. With my husband's permission, we invited the artist to come over to our house to talk. It may take some time for this project to be completed, however, my husband has agreed to having a painting done including all members of our family (our son who died and our other children plus their spouses). I also asked of the possibility of one or two of our pets be included. This has been a dream, in my mind, ever since our son's death. It will be an amazing treasure to display in our home!

I am grateful for the kindness of my husband and this dear friend.

An experienced dragon slayer-tamer taming the dragons within in 2018!
For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. II Timothy 1:7 KJV
And who is he who will harm you if you become followers of what is good? But even if you should suffer for righteousness sake [for what is right], you are blessed. And do not be afraid of their threats, nor be troubled. I Peter 3:13-14, NKJV
Warrior, Demi Lovato https://youtu.be/


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MAZZYR's Photo MAZZYR Posts: 9,188
10/4/14 9:02 A

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A favorite restaurant where the kindness of the staff makes the dining experience extra special.

A new acquaintance is becoming a friend because her kindness makes her a special person.

Giving and receiving compliments is an act of kindness in my book. I love receiving them as I enjoy giving them.



Edited by: MAZZYR at: 10/4/2014 (09:14)
Mazzy


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ATRANSFORMATION's Photo ATRANSFORMATION Posts: 9,761
10/2/14 7:22 P

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My girlfriend and I brought our two little dogs out to brunch today at my favorite restaurant in town. Besides the delicious food and a lovely patio filled with flowers, I realized the reason I REALLY like the place is because of the employees' kindness. Some examples:

We both were ordering a special breakfast entree, which they cut off at 11:00 a.m. But her care giver was late, and I knew she wasn't going to make it before that time. When I ordered the food at 10:55, I ordered the food, and explained even though she wasn't there yet, I knew what she wanted. The server was SO kind, and said she'd get the order in, but ask them to hold it (they are usually VERY strict) and they did, until almost 11:30!

Without us even asking, the server brought a bowl of water for the dogs.

She also noticed the napkins blew under the table before we did, and brought more for us!

At the pet store later, the checker took out a bag of treats and threw them into my dogs carrier...just because.

Kindness is EVERYWHERE! We just need to keep looking!

~~~Kathy~~~

Scales lie. Pants don't lie.
~~~

If the only prayer you ever say is "thank you" that shall suffice. ~~~~~~ Meister Eckhart


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SLASALLE's Photo SLASALLE SparkPoints: (282,238)
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10/1/14 8:37 P

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One of Beth's wishes as we talked while in hospice was that some of her money go in small, regular amounts to her older brother who never really held a job and gets only a very, very small amount of money from Social Security. She just wanted him to have a little extra pocket money each month. He's never been good with money, hence the small amounts sent monthly.

Today I mailed his monthly cash. I always put a little note in that shares something that his sister liked about him - and then I sign it with love from me, for Beth.


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MTRACHEL's Photo MTRACHEL Posts: 1,454
10/1/14 8:10 P

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I've been working to take things that previously triggered me to be less than patient and kind and use them as triggers to be kind. One thing is when people don't see that I'm busy and in a hurry and have a question. Today I remembered my kind voice (instead of my I'm in a hurry voice) when I answered my coworkers questions.

Every day, think as you wake up, today I am fortunate to be alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it. I am going to use all my energies to develop myself, to expand my heart out to others; to achieve enlightenment for the benefit of all beings. I am going to have kind thoughts towards others, I am not going to get angry or think badly about others. I am going to benefit others as much as I can."
-- H.H. the Dalai Lama
Mountain time


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ATRANSFORMATION's Photo ATRANSFORMATION Posts: 9,761
10/1/14 7:08 P

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My step daughters obituary came out in the paper today.

I have received emails and uexpected phone calls from friends and acquaintances offering condolences and words of kindness. I am missing her terribly, and her death has triggered such profound grief related to the loss of her dad (my hubby) that it is only through these simple gestures that I find the strength to continue on, when I really wonder if it is worth it some days.

It is an incredible felling to be on the receiving end of kindness...

~~~Kathy~~~

Scales lie. Pants don't lie.
~~~

If the only prayer you ever say is "thank you" that shall suffice. ~~~~~~ Meister Eckhart


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GIRLINBRAZIL's Photo GIRLINBRAZIL Posts: 6,878
10/1/14 6:35 P

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Three things... Monday I gave away a bracelet from Brazil to our guide at the Rocket Center in Huntsville after talking a lot about Brazil and our work there. Later as we left as was glad to see he had already put it on! He thanked me profusely.

Yesterday a man who looked rather lonely walked down the street in front of our house. I paused in my own return to our house from a walk and asked if his dog was friendly. He proceeded to tell me all about himself and how he was looking at the church beside our house and wondered if the people were friendly and kind to all. I was glad to know and be able to say that it was definitely the most accepting and encouraging place I had ever been.

Today a young man from our neighborhood happened by while dh and youngest were outside. He's had a rough life and often roams aimlessly. We offered him a bowl of soup for supper and he came in to eat it with some happy conversation about nothing much - just happy.

I believe in small acts of kindness every day!

“Fear arises when we imagine that everything depends on us.” E. Elliot


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REBCCA's Photo REBCCA SparkPoints: (423,993)
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10/1/14 8:31 A

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I love my fast paced KJ walks with my dogs emoticon and often walk through to 'backyard' of a retirement home as it is usually welcome shade at the end of our route. I was cruising down the walk when I saw an old cowboy slumped in his wheelchair. He asked what breed my dog was as I whisked by, so I stopped, pulled out my headphones and went back to him. I offered him dear H to pet. He beamed with joy as his gnarled hands caressed her silky smooth coat. Her curled tail was wagging happily as she took in the affection. emoticon I found myself with a tear for how lovely the interaction affected us all and was again affirmed with the benefits of taking that extra moment for kindness. emoticon

"'Enough' is a feast. Buddhist proverb


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ATRANSFORMATION's Photo ATRANSFORMATION Posts: 9,761
10/1/14 1:35 A

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I am starting this a day early as a sample of what one can say. ANYTHING about kindness is fine!

Today, I demonstrated kindness by

* Making a pot of soup for a neighbor
* Listening to a friend while she cried in grief as she faced another loss.
* Allowing kids at the grocery store to hold my Tiger Lily...



~~~Kathy~~~

Scales lie. Pants don't lie.
~~~

If the only prayer you ever say is "thank you" that shall suffice. ~~~~~~ Meister Eckhart


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