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~JOSEY~'s Photo ~JOSEY~ Posts: 453
11/11/08 4:09 P

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hello everyone!!

sorry i've been MIA! i knew i'd not be able to post over the weekend, but yesterday and part of today have just been swamped. i wanted to stop in and let you all know i didnt fall off the face of the earth! LOL!

i'll either be back to chat more later tonight or i'll be posting in the morning. i hopped on here this morning with the intent to post--and ended up leaving the browser up all day so it probably looks like i've been beboppin around here all day. haha! not the case!

hope you all had an enjoyable weekend. this is a super busy week for me--lots of birthdays, outings, and we are having a friend come to visit for the weekend. i hope to get the ball rolling here soon!!

ttfn!
~josey~

do you have endometriosis? check out my new spark group at teams.sparkpeople.com/holisti
cweightlosswithendo


my blog:
www.sillygolucky.com

eat from the earth...breathe in the sky...live in moderation...
cultivate kindness...all one day at a time.


 current weight: 209.2 
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MANNAG's Photo MANNAG Posts: 19
11/7/08 3:20 P

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That was quite a post, Josey! Well said, though, and very inspirational.

Right now I'm trying to fight through what I think is a kidney stone with no pain meds. It's not too bad right now, but the pain has been coming and going for 3 days now. It's getting lower, though, so hopefully it will be over with soon.

I hope everyone else is having a great Friday!

Without love, deeds, even the most brilliant, count as nothing. - St. Therese of Lisieux
~JOSEY~'s Photo ~JOSEY~ Posts: 453
11/7/08 10:02 A

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happy friday! emoticon

christina, emoticon !! i'm excited to hear your story. i'm glad you are feeling decently well, at least it sounds--and either way i'm positive you will get plenty of motivation and information from our group!

tina--have you tried taking a bath with epsom salts? they will draw the lactic acid build-up out of your muscles and help them feel muchmuch better! but ohhhh man, i know how you feel about those smaller, usually unused muscles being sore. if i go gung-ho on lunges, i get that problem. then it hurts to even sit down on the toilet! LOL!!! drink lots of water, too. and stretch and rub those muscles! those are all things that seem to help me, anyway :) also, good luck on the prospective buyer for your house!! keep us updated.

and also, tina you had asked HOW do i do it all? holistically? hehe. well, this is why i started this group. (here i go...hahah...) let me start by saying that it's a whole new perspective a person has to adopt when removing pharmaceuticals from the picture. it also goes against how most of us are in the world today--results *NOW*, make it as *easy* as possible, *less responsibility* on our part. when you approach your health holistically, you may see SOME results immediately, but you have to learn to appreciate SMALL changes, and a *slower* accumulation of those changes. and it's not always as easy as popping a pill; it requires *lifestyle changes*, and usually permanent ones. and finally, by choosing holistic health care you are *accepting responsibility* for your health. i promise you tho, it is VERY empowering! and women with endo, IMHO, NEED to feel empowered. we are so beat down by those who dont understand!! (BUT!! we need to learn to be understanding of their not understanding...yep, we do.)

now, that just paints a gloomy picture, hey? LOL! well take heart. emoticon if you want to really know how i do it...

well, i DONT always do it. i'm not perfect!!

but i chose this route because while my lazy self didnt really want to put in the effort to change, i KNEW in my heart that going this way would help me get healthy overall. and that's what we all really want, right? i was so afraid of what Lupron and other things would do to my already crumbling person. and the awesome thing is that no matter what youve been through or treatments you've had thus far, you can add this way of self-care to your life NOW! i've made enough small changes in the last few years that i've stuck with to see results! and while there have been some really frustrating, doubting and down times, i have grown so much as a person from this responsibility. i wouldnt change a thing!

it has caused me to seriously want to help other women through the process, because it is such a much gentler way to be with ourselves. while most women with endo end up finding their rough, tough and strong side with the things we have to endure--we ARE still women, and we deserve gentleness. it's just that we've never been given that option. not even from our doctors! we're always told it's all in our head and we need to tough it out! or that there's no cure and the drugs are all we can do to manage it. OR get pregnant, only to have the endo come back again full force. WRONG!

so as you think about what you want out of this group, please also tell yourself it's okay to NOT BE PERFECT. you wont have to eat perfect, exercise like a machine, be a master yogi or take loads of supplements everyday to feel better. lol. just listen to what your body is trying to tell you and over time, you wont feel so badly changing those old habits. holistically caring for yourself is a trial-and-error process at first until you learn what your body needs most!

ahhhh okay, i've babbled on forever again. emoticon but you know what? it's very therapeutic for me so i hope you dont mind! LOL. and i WANT to help you! i want to pass on the things i've learned so you can use what works for you. and dont worry, we'll talk about this stuff all the time--there's even more to learn than what i've said!

AND...please, if any of you have already tried some natural methods, do tell do tell! i'm more than happy to give all my info, but we are a team, so pipe in! we can all learn from each other.

okay! so here's the deal. we havent heard from everyone on the group yet, and i was thinking it might be best to wait to dive in to the nerdier stuff until everyone has conversed here a little more. plus, we might get some more members over the weekend! does that sound good to you? i am going away for the weekend, so you probably wont hear from me until sunday night or monday...but i'll at least try to check in and read!

soooo if you made it to the bottom of this post LOL... emoticon

please feel free to be as chatty as you want!!

now, let's hear from everyone!! emoticon

i hope you plan on having a fun, happy weekend!!

tatafornow!
~josey~ emoticon

Edited by: ~JOSEY~ at: 11/7/2008 (10:08)
do you have endometriosis? check out my new spark group at teams.sparkpeople.com/holisti
cweightlosswithendo


my blog:
www.sillygolucky.com

eat from the earth...breathe in the sky...live in moderation...
cultivate kindness...all one day at a time.


 current weight: 209.2 
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MYLUVWYATT's Photo MYLUVWYATT Posts: 1,461
11/6/08 4:20 P

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Hello.....

I haven't been on because I've been in PAIN, not in Endo. pain mind you, boy I'm pretty disgusted with myself....I took a Zumbaa class on Tues. night with some friends and I hurt myself, I'm such a dork, I was even making fun of myself at the class in between songs on the cd the what do you call her I'm drawing a blank, teacher I guess, I'd look over at my friends, we're in the back of course, and say: oh I'm dying, oh look at me, I'm out of shape for this, then I'd start laughing.....I don' think the others liked it as they would look over at me like: what in the world is she talking about.
This class was what I was told a dance class like Latin dance, ok NOT - it was dance aroebic class like not beginners either, I was huffinf & puffing like mad...I couldn't stop laughing at myself either, I'd look at myself in the mirror and say to myself, oh my gosh I can't believe I'm doing this but I'm also the kind of person that won't give up on what I'm doing either, so I'm feeling it REALLY feeling pain now, and still I won't stop, I feel like I'm going to pass out at this point and laugh and say oh this is a half hour class right, they look at me and say ONLY 30 more minutes to go....woohoo for me.
I DID make it through and thought: no PAIN, no gain, yeah right.....
Wed. morning, I couldn't literally get out of bed and I had to get ready for work.
My mom (lives with us, whole nother' story)had to help me get dressed, I could barely sit down to use the bathroom, oh my gosh, I hurt everywhere, like my back labor pain with my son, it was THAT BAD.
I STILL hurt today and have been taking ibuprofen like crazy.
I had hubby rub on Tiger Balm all over my tail bone to my neck and spine last night and belly too.
I laid down in bed and all of a sudden it felt like I was on fire, I tried to start dreaming but then, it went from extreme hot to extreme cold and felt like sharp little needles were in me, oh it was bad.
So I can't sit for long periods of time, ouch I can feel the pain now.
Feel free to laugh at me or no I mean with me right?....Matthew (hubby) said those are muscles you haven't used for awhile, those are muscles, ugh....yeah ok if you say so, like he would know he's a stick, haha but he's good, never ever has made a fat joke in his life about me.
Ok, so where was I....oh yeah I might not be here often this week, depending on how I feel.
I usually look at my email AT LEAST once a day, if not twice or more depending on what's going on.

Hey, someone is actually looking at our house on Sat. whoopee, just hadda tell you that!

Also Josey....

I haven't read your blogs or other pages yet on here, plan to/when I can sit again.

What I really want to know is HOW you do it all, holistically???

I've never gone that route but my mom and my grandmother (her mom) has done things naturally all their lives.

You will have to tell me about it or when I can actually sit down to read it all.

I want to know your stratigies on how you live like this and everything.

Ok I'll pop in again when I can.

Tina :)



~JOSEY~'s Photo ~JOSEY~ Posts: 453
11/5/08 4:26 P

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emoticon

geesh, i hope i didnt scare ya'll away. LOL. soooo i'll make this short and sweet! emoticon

i hope you all are having a great hump day! i'm getting ready to leave to go watch a few friends' presenatations on some projects they have been working on at a local biodynamic agricultural institute. then later on tonite i have qigong class! should be a fun evening :)

i wanted to bring our forum called Holistic Endo Treatment & Weight Loss Library Forum to your attention if you havent checked it out yet! that's where i'll be posting all the "goodies" about the holistic treatments for endo and weight loss. you can read the posts there so far for details! :D

if everyone is ready to jump into getting the group chuggin along, i'll probably get some stuff up for the book discussion tomorrow :)

how often does everyone plan on stopping in to post? i can check in almost every day! just wanted to get an idea so i can plan for that in the future.

hope to hear from you all soon!!
~josey~

do you have endometriosis? check out my new spark group at teams.sparkpeople.com/holisti
cweightlosswithendo


my blog:
www.sillygolucky.com

eat from the earth...breathe in the sky...live in moderation...
cultivate kindness...all one day at a time.


 current weight: 209.2 
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214.5
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203.5
198
~JOSEY~'s Photo ~JOSEY~ Posts: 453
11/4/08 4:15 P

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emoticon welcome rain and lindsey!

well first of all, i have to say that i am so happy to hear that we all have men in our lives that are supportive and loving. emoticon how awesome is that!?! we all can attest to the craziness of endo and how it changes our personalities at the drop of a hat--and my goodness it takes a special man to see thru that and remember who we are! YAY to our honies!! hehe!

rain--love that nickname! emoticon and i love your icon. that cute lil lightning bug (that's what we call fireflies in IN...where i grew up. lol.) is just adorable. are you an outdoorsy type person? i am! :D so what sorts of treatments are you currently using? are you on Lupron or birth control? most of my pain comes the first 2-3 days of my period as well. i find that it is way worse when i've not eaten well or have been inactive, especially in the days leading up to it. do you know if you are ovulating at all with such a short cycle? i have actually been tracking my basal temp in the mornings and cervical fluid (yeah, ick. lol.) for a few months now to figure out if i am ovulating! it's actually very interesting :) i suppose i'm a supergeek that way. haha! while i would like to get pregnant eventually (when God wills it!) i think knowing whether or not i'm truly ovulating can give me an idea how my estrogen/progesterone balance is coming along.

lindsey, er galley! -- i empathize with your disgust of being overweight and not how you "used to be." while i dont think my weight gain was necessarily from endo, it is still hard for me to not see myself as the size 8 i was for the first 20 years of my life! then in about 4 years' time, i gained over 100lb. i have gotten rid of about half of it, but have struggled right around 200-210 for the last several years. i many times say the EXACT same thing as you--when i look in the mirror, that just cant be me!! i look so old some days. emoticon however!!! (yep, i cant stay down for too long! lol.) i want to encourage you to visualize what you want to be! you can do it. baby steps. you can find who you are again! she's not gone forever, i promise! while she might come out a little more grown up she is still in there!! emoticon i hope you find encouragement and confidence in our group! just let it all out :)

tina--doggone you, you made me cry. LOL! i read your post right before i went to bed last nite. on a lighter note, i'm soooo happy my gabby fingers have some competition. teehee!! emoticon anyhoo, thank you from my heart for sharing your story with us. i love how you said, "I think a lot, can you tell? I really am normal, maybe, I guess I have a lot to get off my chest." that is SO ME! haha! i suppose not many people in my life understand the endo, and all they do is block out my voice and just see me banging my gums about my experience. (imagine the Peanuts adult "wah-wah wah-wah-wah-wah...lol) so on boards like this, it is my place to let it flow and learn from other women, too! we have all gone through so much pain (literally), heartache, doubt, confusion because of the endo and its treatments...but you know, it's so profound how if you dig really deep, you can turn this health hurdle into a positive life lesson. i think you are moving in that direction, dont you? i'm guessing most, if not all of us have either already reached a breaking point or are heading there when it comes to what we deal with emotionally and physically. it reminds me of this quote:

-- you will remain the same
-- until the pain of remaining the same
-- is greater than
-- the pain of change.

gives me goosebumps. and strangely enough, change is starting to feel mighty daggone good to me!! i hope we can all start moving i that direction with each others' help.

just so i dont make this post too much longer, i would like to share a link with you all to my blog. it's a post i wrote that contains 6 other links to older blog posts that chronicle my weight loss journey and my endo diagnosis and how i started treatment. they also talk about what i think about food, the environment and how it all affects us. i am offering this to you as a way to get to know me better if you dare! hehe. they are all pretty long...just a warning...LOL. but i'm sure you're not shocked! ;) haha!

www.sillygolucky.com/blog/2007/12/14
/t
he-evolution-of-me-and-my-blog.html


do any of you have blogs outside of spark?

and with that, i shall say buenas dias for now!
~josey~

p.s. i bravely went shopping today (normally it's a nightmare and i end up leaving feeling like a total lump of crap about myself!). i got a superdoopercute pair of levi's on sale--size 16!! i usually cant wear 16s in levi's. (i usually shop at kmart for jeans. LOL!) i have them on already and am strutting around like my butt is cute and little. HAHA! dont you love it when a pair of jeans fits that good? it's the little things!! just thought i'd share emoticon

Edited by: ~JOSEY~ at: 11/4/2008 (16:23)
do you have endometriosis? check out my new spark group at teams.sparkpeople.com/holisti
cweightlosswithendo


my blog:
www.sillygolucky.com

eat from the earth...breathe in the sky...live in moderation...
cultivate kindness...all one day at a time.


 current weight: 209.2 
220
214.5
209
203.5
198
MYLUVWYATT's Photo MYLUVWYATT Posts: 1,461
11/3/08 10:01 P

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I'll quickly reply here too, as I see it tends to help when you read & talk with other women, young ladies that have or haven't been diagnosed yet with Endo. and KNOW that you are not alone.

Here's my story in a nutshell:

I got my period when I was 12.

I've had pain since I can remember, I want to say 16 is significant (also when I lost my virginity, but not sure that the two go together).

At 21 I just couldn't take it anymore and was working at a low-key job in a hospital and finally decided well I have good insurance, I wanted this particular doctor to perform this lap surgery on me.
Well I thought if anyone would "understand" SHE would, she was female right?, no way.
She brushed me aside at first and said: it's just gas......what, have any of you been told that?
It makes me sick when I hear of that now, I know my body and though we all have gas sometime in our life, that wasn't it.
I basically made her do the surgery and although it was level 1 Endo., she said oh I guess you were right Tina, it is Endo.
Oh my gosh, I'm glad I knew, thought she was dumb for not, but what are you going to do, and thought now what?

I've been through the ringer literally, like I explained to Josey.

I saw numerous doctors since that time in my life, all within a 5 year span I want to say.
I went to school in pain, then in my work life in pain.

Around the age of 22 is when I met my now-husband.

I was working at a desk job, oh I want to say about 2003-2004 and still the pain just never got better. Doctors didn't know what to do, they would just prescribe something to get me off their backs and back to work or refer me to "specialists" which actually suggested to me to get a hysterectomy.....what, no way I didn't have children yet and wasn't married...that was before 2003 though and in between, sorry I might be a little off on my time frames because it was always, round and round we go where I stop no one will know, why? because the doctors, the "specialists", they went to college yet many,many of them didn't know what Endo. was, let alone treat it or help it.

At this desk job, I ended up going on medical leave, with the pain of Endo. so bad,
I never went back because they let me go due to it, but how was I to help how I felt.

I felt like I was dying inside out, no one seemed to understand, I was told so many times: "you don't look sick", so you're not.

Oh how I hated those words and still when I hear someone say that, I've actually made comments, how do you know?

Well if you've kept up this far,...thank you.

Matthew & I were married in 2003 and maybe I was seeing doctors then too but still felt very frustrated with it all.

In Sept. 2004, I decided to have another lap surgery, this time hubby and I discussed having kids and I said I'd better get the lap to clean up the endo. and make it possible to conceive or help it along anyways.

Somehow I did find a nice woman doctor at a more specialized clinic and she performed the lap and understood it all.

I had my son in Sept. 2005 so it must have worked but it took a lot to get there.

Hubby and I tried to conceive right after our son was born and since, it's been 3 years and nothing yet.

My pain came back right away after conceiving, so no relief there.

I also had Preeclampsia towards the end of my pregnancy with our son and it too took a toll on my body.

Just this year April 2008, I decided to have a 3rd lap done, pain came back so intense, I had to give it another shot, also conception isn't happening and would like it to soon.

I had 3 months of Lupron done...boom, boom, boom after lap., HSG (ink in the tubes) in Sept., now on femara (used for breast cancer patients, also can be used but not fda certified for fertility)from new doc, she suggested 4 - 6 months, I say 3 months is it.

My body has had it and I can feel it too.

I don't think I mentioned this before with the 2 other laps but I also was given 6-month doses of Lupron at a time, 6-months on, 6-months off, that sort of thing, twice.

I was on numerous drugs: bcp's that didn't work, muscle relaxers that didn't help, high dosages of pain relievers helped once in awhile but not all that often, I used to pump my body full of Advil, heck I would go through a bottle of Advil in a cycle.

Now my doctor says no....it can hurt my kidneys but what are we to do?

I've also tried chiropractic but that really didn't really help it either.

At my last ob/gyn checkup I learned: my bowel and another organ attached itself to my left ovary and the doctor had to pull it off....I think it sounds yuck but at least she saw it and did something.

My left tube has adhesions and is blocked, ink from the HSG they performed would not flow through.

Now it's get pregnant on my right side or not at all.

I work through a lot, there are times when I feel great (those are the times not having my cycle), and times when I feel like why? why is this happening, I never say why to me? because why to anyone but why do we have to have such obstacles in our lives, isn't there enough to worry about?

But is this what brings us all together, so we can help each other out, I don't know.

I think a lot, can you tell?

I really am normal, maybe, I guess I have a lot to get off my chest.

I hope someone else replies with not as much of a mess as I have here.

I think that's my problem, I just say it like it is, no making up stories, I'm a pretty honest person, I'll tell you anything you'd like to know within reason.

I probably should repost this and clean it up but....I'm not going to.

This is me, this is what happened, I can't wait to see what Josey has in mind for us all and we gotta thank her for wanting to help us out here too.

Please everyone, anyone, let us know your stories.

Mine is probably the messiest so you can't do wrong there...haha.

I just found an online friend today, out of nowhere really when I've been feeling lost, lonely at times.
Even though I have my close-knit family and a few close friends, it's refreshing to still see there's a world out there and others that want to listen, talk, care too.

Can't wait to hear from you all!

Hopefully my next post will make more sense and we can get some great conversations going here! :)








~JOSEY~'s Photo ~JOSEY~ Posts: 453
11/3/08 3:45 P

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emoticon tina, kris and lindsey (LGALLAHAIR)!!!

welcome welcome welcome! kick up your feet, grab a cup of green tea and a square of dark chocolate make yourselves at home. hehe!

sounds like we have similar stories, ladies. i started my period on my 10th birthday! lovely gift, hey? emoticon i always had bad cramps, too. and like kris's family, the pain was typical and i was told to tough it out and take tylenol. which is what i did! i high school i started having really bad ovulation pain (1-2 days at a time, and it hurt to stand or walk) and my dr told me it was normal. i understand now what NORMAL "middleschmertz" is...however, i also understand now that at that time my body was trying to tell me something WAS wrong.

once i got into my 20s i had a lot more other types of pain--with bowel movements, sex, and sometimes really debilitating cramps even worse than before. i also started having PMS symptoms and almost cystic acne on my neck of all places! i never had those things before, but now i realize my hormonal shifts were getting more and more drastic. but still, i just figured it was just a woman's lot. it never dawned on me to have anything seriously checked out until 2 years ago this month i just knew something didnt feel right in my abdomen. after an ultrasound, i found out i had a chocolate cyst on my right ovary.

in march of the following year (2007) i had a lap and was diagnosed with stage 3 endo. they removed the cyst and saved the ovary. my tubes were pretty blocked--they did the best they could to get the dye to go thru. i honestly think THAT is what is keeping me from getting pregnant, as well as an improper estrogen/progesterone balance. but i am determined to shrink the endo away!!

i havent been on any pharmaceuticals whatsoever. about 10 years ago i was on birth control (but not for endo, only contraception) for 3-6 months. but it made me gain weight so fast! so that was that. lol.

tina--i'd love to hear your life story!! hehe. give it to us in chunks if you want, or a novel if you wish. the more we know about each other, the better we can support each other! your little wyatt is a total cutie-patootie!! also, what is femara? forgive my ignorance but unfortunately i'm not with it too well on the currently prescribed hormones or painkillers. i'm sure this group will quickly get me up to speed!

kris--i'm sorry your sister hasnt understood and been supportive of you about your endo. sadly, its one of the most misunderstood diseases a woman can have, isnt it! even by other women. so what is your current plan of attack for the endo? are you on birth control or any other drugs?

lindsey--hope to hear from you soon! emoticon

have a great rest of the day!
~josey~

p.s. as you will quickly find out, i am very chatty. ;) so if you are, too, don't hold back! LOL!

Edited by: ~JOSEY~ at: 11/3/2008 (15:45)
do you have endometriosis? check out my new spark group at teams.sparkpeople.com/holisti
cweightlosswithendo


my blog:
www.sillygolucky.com

eat from the earth...breathe in the sky...live in moderation...
cultivate kindness...all one day at a time.


 current weight: 209.2 
220
214.5
209
203.5
198
~JOSEY~'s Photo ~JOSEY~ Posts: 453
11/2/08 10:09 A

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hello!! emoticon

so happy you are here!! i cant wait to learn more about you!! emoticon if you havent yet done so, please hop over to the other forum and introduce yourself under the first sticky topic!

i want to take the opportunity to say that whether you are completely new to the idea of a drug-free option for your treatment of endo OR if you have been already implementing it...i have high hopes that this group will be an excellent resource for you!

this group will provide plenty of things for us all to absorb: books and discussions to educate ourselves, challenges, goals, motivation and encouragement and of course daily chat! and it is UP TO YOU on how much you want to participate. but just remember--when you are part of a team, the more you participate the more you (and everyone else!) gets out of it!

one other thing--while we can discuss fertility issues because more than likely it affects most of us, it will NOT be one of our main focuses of this group! we can get into more of this later, but i feel for reasons to keep us focused on healing endo and losing weight that it's better that way! emoticon the good thing is that the information we can share here, tho, can directly benefit that part of our journey!

right away i realized that going this natural route with my endo treatment was a HUGE personal responsibility. it seemed very overwhelming at first--i felt so alone and many times along the way i've felt like giving up! my doctor gave me crazy looks when i told him at my post-op appt i'd decided to try to work on my diet and lose weight instead of taking the Lupron injections! but you know what? i have grown so much this way. i have learned to listen to my body and change my attitude toward its amazing capacity to find balance and heal. i have overcome a lot of emotional build-up from over the years and while i still have a longggg way to go, i feel better (physically, emotionally, spiritually!) than i have in a long time!

i just want you to know how passionate i am about this way of life, this approach to personal care, weight loss and healing! i encourage you to join this group with an open mind--and TRUST yourself, your gut instincts! once we get more members, it will be awesome to put all our experiences together and help each other find our own path. emoticon

have a LOVELY day!!!
~josey~ emoticon

Edited by: ~JOSEY~ at: 11/2/2008 (10:28)
do you have endometriosis? check out my new spark group at teams.sparkpeople.com/holisti
cweightlosswithendo


my blog:
www.sillygolucky.com

eat from the earth...breathe in the sky...live in moderation...
cultivate kindness...all one day at a time.


 current weight: 209.2 
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