Group photo
Author:
KLASSY813's Photo KLASSY813 SparkPoints: (5,555)
Fitness Minutes: (1,075)
Posts: 332
9/6/13 12:28 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
No...I have not worked since 1993. I worked up till then, at which time I married my husband and he wanted me to be a stay-at-home mom for our 5 children (his-hers-&-ours family) Since being diagnosed with bi-polar in 2009 and keeping track of my moods and actions, my Dr. has decided I should be disabled. I forget on a weekly basis to turn off the oven or burner, I forget what I am suppose to do when I get up to put things away--I'll find myself just standing in the middle of the room wondering what I was suppose to be doing, and I can't remember things my husband asks me to do ie: he asked me one day to bring him a clean shirt for work, just as I was walking out the door..I promptly hung the phone up and walked out the door without even a 2nd thought about the shirt till I got to his work..had to make the long trip back home to get it. I don't like being this way and don't know if it will get better or if there is anything I can do to "fix" it.

Kerrville, Texas native

I will not give up on myself!!

When you feel like quitting: Think about why you started.

It does not matter how slow you go...So long as you do not stop.
-Confucious-




 current weight: 235.0 
239
229.25
219.5
209.75
200
SARBEAR219 Posts: 50
8/24/13 5:48 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Took a break from sparkpeople for awhile, but am BACK, and wanting to get more involved with this team, as I have been struggling with bipolar since I was 17 (24 now), especially the past 2 years. I was honestly very excited to see that a discussion was started on this topic as it is an issue that I am struggling with right now..so LILPIXIE, here is my input!

I was diagnosed at 17 like I said, yet lived very successfully with the disorder all throughout college. I took classes full time, and worked as a CNA in a nursing home 1 night a week and every other weekend. I don't know how I did it, because I can look back now and see many "ups and downs", but somehow managed to do it and graduate with honors. However, my bipolar took on a life of its own when I was 22. I had to drop out of medical school. :-( I attempted to work part-time, but was always taking a leave because I was in and out of the hospital. I am honestly surprised that I was not fired. After my one year medical leave from medical school, I decided that I was not passionate about science anymore and that I wanted to do something else, but didn't know what. I knew that I loved to work with older adults, so when my husband and I moved back to the college town where we met so he could finish his doctorate, I just took a CNA position so I could be around older people. However, I only worked 4 hour shifts, three times a week. I just did not feel like I could handle any more than that. Which made me feel REALLY pathetic. But I had to realize that the fact that I could even hold down a job after what I'd been through is amazing.

I worked the 4pm-8pm shift at the nursing home because my meds made it so I couldn't get up by 7 am, and there was no way my meds would let me stay up until 11 pm. Eventually I started working in the activity department one day a week from 10 am- 3pm, in addition to the few 4-8 shifts I was doing. I discovered that doing activities with older adults is where my heart is, and it has become my true passion. So when our activity director left and my boss offered me her job, I jumped at the chance. So now I work at the same facility as the activity director 10 am-4 pm Mon-Fri. I absolutely love my job, I do. I love the population I work with, the residents make me laugh so much, and it is wonderful for me to feel like I have a purpose in this life. To feel like I am making a difference in someone else's life. Plus, having a regular schedule is very helpful for dealing with my disorder.

HOWEVER. I had a recent depressive episode, that unfortunately led to 5 days in the hospital. I got out on a Saturday, and was back at work on Monday. I tried so hard to convince myself and others that I was fine, but I have had to be brutally honest with myself and admit that 30 hours a week is more than I can handle. So I humbled myself and went to talk to my boss. I said, I just can't keep up with this. To my utmost surprise, she told me that she was willing to do whatever it takes to make this work for me. So we have been working on finding an activity assistant to come and work 2 days a week for me. And I feel a HUGE sense of relief, because though I have been pretty darn stable for a year, and I have "survived" the episodes, I do not at all feel like I have "recovered".

My husband was on board with me going down to 3 days a week, as long as I don't just sit on the couch and watch tv all day with my days off like I used to. And I know that is bad for me too, so I have been attempting to build a schedule for myself on my days off, with things that are about ME, that are going to enrich my life and help me get stronger mentally, physically..and help me learn how to successfully live with this disorder. So examples of what I am going to do on my days off are... go to a NAMI support group, take a NAMI peer-to-peer course, see my counselor, do a group training course at the gym, go to group exercise classes at the gym, journal, read... don't know what else yet. I have also considered that during my off days I may take a few hours and do some of my "office" work at home, to take the stress off when I do work, and allow me more time to spend actually working with the residents.

PHEW...I wrote a novel...I hope that this helps in some small way LILPIXIE...just wanted to share my story! My suggestion...do what works for you. You do NOT have to have an 8-5 mon-fri job. There ARE jobs out there with flexible hours, and if you are upfront with your boss there is a good chance that she/he will be willing to work with you and develop a schedule that meets your needs. I personally recommend working, or even simply volunteering...I believe that it is essential for everyone, but especially those of us who struggle with mental illness, to find a passion and a purpose in life, and to give back to others.

Let me know your thoughts!

SANDALWOOD108's Photo SANDALWOOD108 Posts: 306
8/24/13 2:56 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I've been unable to work for 7 years due to chronic pain and my ups and downs.

Adopt a homeless pet :)


 current weight: 198.6 
207
197.75
188.5
179.25
170
BLOOGRL's Photo BLOOGRL SparkPoints: (10,382)
Fitness Minutes: (2,093)
Posts: 381
8/23/13 10:16 A

Send Private Message
Reply
I work, yes. But I feel miserable all the time there, I find. I just...never have energy to do much and don't really have a place to fit in. I constantly feel.."stuck".

First Goal Weight: 260lbs
***Reached October 17, 2013

Second Goal Weight: 200lbs

Third Goal Weight: 160lbs

Much Love & Happiness To You On Your Journey.


 Pounds lost: 60.0 
0
30.25
60.5
90.75
121
LIZLIZ67's Photo LIZLIZ67 SparkPoints: (0)
Fitness Minutes: (431)
Posts: 4
8/22/13 9:50 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
lilpixie, I am one of those who is too busy to post because I work. Obviously I'm posting but my complaint is that I am TOO TIRED to do almost anything outside of work. I've had BP since I was a kid (dx as a teenager) and I'm 46 now. I work for a school system and that has been a really good thing because we get so many long weekends. Also, lots of time off during the stressful holiday season. I try to recuperate during the summer, as I am usually really pooped by the end of the year. And we have about 20 sick and personal days.
Oh, also getting off of work every day before 4 pm makes it a lot easier mostly because I can make counseling appointments, Dr. appts, pick up meds, etc.
Seeing a counselor is vital in helping me deal with the stresses related to work. Working is good for me emotionally, but I wish I could afford to work just part-time. My meds make it so hard to get up early enough to do extra stuff in the am and I have to go to bed early 'cause I need so much sleep. I feel restricted in how much fun or relaxation I can get and it bums me out.
On a more positive note, I found that working with kids really gets me out of my (depressed) head (they're funny!).Also positive, since going back this fall I've continued my summer running habit. BTW I was on SSDI for a few years before my current job of 14yrs.

 November Minutes: 0
0
90
180
270
360
KIMBERLY0916's Photo KIMBERLY0916 SparkPoints: (117,231)
Fitness Minutes: (89,345)
Posts: 2,090
8/20/13 2:12 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
i've been wondering lately if i was stable enough or whatever to work. i was randomly talking with a psuedo-cousin about her job prospects and passions. up came the topic of digital art and more. i have an online presentation today with The Art Institute. I have to figure out if my passion is possible. online, on campus, or in person in Hollywood. it'll be interesting. we have to be able to afford it. mom says i'm ready. and it's ok for right now.

it's been a LONG time coming for me to feel stable or ready

How are you measuring your year? Speeding tickets, cups of coffee, love


BECAUSE I CAN


 current weight: 50.0  over
55
27.5
0
-27.5
-55
LILPIXIE55's Photo LILPIXIE55 SparkPoints: (43,165)
Fitness Minutes: (57,854)
Posts: 82
8/13/13 3:10 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Thanks so much for replying emoticon WOW your school idea sounds really good emoticon All the best with that emoticon emoticon

I ROCK :D


 November Minutes: 0
0
90
180
270
360
MCQUEENSTEPH's Photo MCQUEENSTEPH SparkPoints: (7,810)
Fitness Minutes: (512)
Posts: 145
8/13/13 10:25 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
No, I do not work and even when I did work I could not hold a job for more than a month or two. My bipolar and anxiety make it hard for me to deal with people on a day to day basis, especially when I am suppose to be around them 24/7. I am waiting on my disability, but there is no guarantee that I will get that either. I would love to work but I think I am just going to go back to to school to keep my mind occupied and get my Associates in Arts, General Studies.

Starting Weight: 252 lbs. 4/24/14
Current Weight: 270 lbs. 02/15/2015
Goal Weight: 165 lbs.

"As the lotus flower emerges from the mud, we too can blossom, as we arise from the darkness of our past. "


 current weight: 258.0 
260
245
230
215
200
LILPIXIE55's Photo LILPIXIE55 SparkPoints: (43,165)
Fitness Minutes: (57,854)
Posts: 82
8/6/13 2:33 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Thank you all so much for your stories, it's really helpful to me to hear how and what others manage. I am an artist and have spent most of my life involved in project work, I think I didn't realise that that actually was an essential adaptation that merely organically arose. Ummmmmm I would still love to hear more stories if anyone else is open to sharing?

I ROCK :D


 November Minutes: 0
0
90
180
270
360
AYLAMAY SparkPoints: (8,453)
Fitness Minutes: (1,083)
Posts: 419
8/5/13 11:19 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I had a lot of problems trying to work as a nurse who has bipolar. I gravitated to 12 hour shifts, which for me were more like 16 hour shifts, during which time I only stopped to go to the bathroom or take a slug from my giant cup of coffee, constantly refilled from the supply at the nurse's station. I took great pride in my work, was never written up at my last job. (had 3 leaves of absence in four years from my first nursing job, working for a big city). But sixteen hour shifts four days a week on mugs and mugs of coffee and a supply of cigarettes don't go well with bipolar, so by 2/2003, I reluctantly resigned my last position as a nurse and filed for disability (SSI) and was approved within a month.
I greatly miss my nursing job, even more now that I am being a nurse to my mother, seeing how these young ones don't seem to know what the heck they are doing. I loved Nursing greatly, all aspects. If I could go back, I would in a second.
Try not to tell anyone more than you have to that you are bipolar, just as you wouldn't tell anyone you had syphyllis (this is my own opinion only, and reflects how I was treated when I told people).
Best wishes to anyone who tries to make an honest living with this incredible condition. It is an admirable thing you do. Keep on it.

"Look for the positive in each day, even if some days you have to look a little harder"

-Unknown.


 current weight: 157.0 
166
162
158
154
150
JD6266 SparkPoints: (30)
Fitness Minutes: (0)
Posts: 10
8/5/13 10:52 P

Send Private Message
Reply
I work, but I really struggle to maintain my performance and a 40 hour work week when I'm changing meds or going through an episode. It frustrates me because I don't want to admit that I can't work as well or as often as I used to be able to. I suppose I'm lucky that I'm able to still work.

I "came out" at work and told everybody that I had bp. I had to at least tell my boss to get some accommodations. I decided to tell everyone else just because I feel the need to educate people about mental illness. So far, I think it is going ok, but I don't know what people really think given that we all have an image of what bp looks like. Has anyone had problems at work because of their bp?

AYLAMAY SparkPoints: (8,453)
Fitness Minutes: (1,083)
Posts: 419
7/18/13 8:19 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I have been bipolar for thirty six years and haven't worked for the last ten. I filed for Social Security in March 2003 and got my first check in April. I miss being a nurse, was my dream job, but i have been very ill with my bipolar, and haven't left the house at all for the last two years (which is something I must remedy soon). I'm sure there are some out there who can relate. Feel free to mail me. My one big investment, my $7500 car, sits now in my driveway with two flat tires and no longer runs, but I have put off calling the Auto wrecker bacause it is the last thing I have left from my independence 10 years ago (it's a symbol). I suppose I should just take a picture and get it over with. Yes, that's what I think I'll do. My work now is helping out my parents (74 and 70) bacause they need help around the house, and I also keep my niece and nephew three days a week this summer. The kids are 12 and 5 and keep me on my toes.

"Look for the positive in each day, even if some days you have to look a little harder"

-Unknown.


 current weight: 157.0 
166
162
158
154
150
LILPIXIE55's Photo LILPIXIE55 SparkPoints: (43,165)
Fitness Minutes: (57,854)
Posts: 82
7/17/13 11:14 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Ummmm I wonder if those that are working are too busy to reply? I am beginning to draw this conclusion in my own life - I get a bit better, I start working again, I work till I crack, I stop work, cycle continues. I wonder if I didn't start work again if I would maintain better health longer? I wonder if I would feel under fulfilled? Lots of wondering! I hope more people reply, I am so interested in other people's experiences. Thank you so much for sharing everyone.

I ROCK :D


 November Minutes: 0
0
90
180
270
360
KIMBERLY0916's Photo KIMBERLY0916 SparkPoints: (117,231)
Fitness Minutes: (89,345)
Posts: 2,090
7/17/13 9:40 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
i was in my last year of college when i was diagnosed .. things were chaotic and difficult to say the least. i did manage to graduate with a BS Computer Science. i worked a professional job for a bit over a year then was bored senseless b/c there wasn't any work for me to do daily or even every hour. about 9 months working two part time jobs elsewhere i ended up quitting and moved to California where I had a full time professional (software product manager) job four years. nervous breakdown and panic attacks and insanity ensue and i had to leave it all behind and move back home to SE Ohio. i've been here 3 years (4th anniversary coming up in 2 weeks) without working. these past few years have been lowest lows and highest highs and all kinds of rollercoaster and rocky. these 7 months i feel like things are getting smoother for me which is nice. i don't know if or when i'll try working again. for now i focus on me and being stable.

How are you measuring your year? Speeding tickets, cups of coffee, love


BECAUSE I CAN


 current weight: 50.0  over
55
27.5
0
-27.5
-55
LILPIXIE55's Photo LILPIXIE55 SparkPoints: (43,165)
Fitness Minutes: (57,854)
Posts: 82
7/16/13 8:59 P

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
Hay thanks so much for replying to my post emoticon here's to a better day tomorrow emoticon

I ROCK :D


 November Minutes: 0
0
90
180
270
360
AMBERDAVVN's Photo AMBERDAVVN SparkPoints: (237)
Fitness Minutes: (130)
Posts: 41
7/16/13 8:38 P

Send Private Message
Reply
I hear ya. Ive slowly become worse over time. Used to be a genetic chemist, now I am on disability (they actually made me) and my brain is like swiss cheese. So, no I don't work. It's a daily, sometimes hourly struggle to keep my head above the water.

I bet Im not the only one who is like that here. I try to let go of the past and focus on helping myself or not getting worse, just finding joy and remembering it - I carry a notebook with me at all times.

�Whether you think you can or can�t, you�re right.� ~Henry Ford


 current weight: 196.0 
196.2
180.9
165.6
150.3
135
LEIGHSDRAGON's Photo LEIGHSDRAGON SparkPoints: (1,402)
Fitness Minutes: (929)
Posts: 62
7/15/13 11:28 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
I work. I have days when I don't even want to go to work. I find one thing that cheers me up about work and focus on that so that I will want to go into work. Or maybe I will be working with someone I actually like so that is a bonus thought. I also think of what kind of example I am setting for my children. I don't want them to think it is ok to quit a job just because you don't want to work. Some people have to work (like me). We don't really have the choice. If I don't work my children don't eat. I hope this helps. Sometimes even when I still don't want to go in once I am there my attitude changes.

 Pounds lost: 6.6 
0
12.5
25
37.5
50
BLAULKEIM's Photo BLAULKEIM SparkPoints: (497,429)
Fitness Minutes: (219,240)
Posts: 5,836
7/15/13 10:51 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
no i do not work,

suzi

happy day all, enjoy the day. be the best you can be.
suzi


 current weight: 123.0 
195
177
159
141
123
LILPIXIE55's Photo LILPIXIE55 SparkPoints: (43,165)
Fitness Minutes: (57,854)
Posts: 82
7/15/13 8:23 A

My SparkPage
Send Private Message
Reply
So the point of my post is to find out if others manage a job? I have spent most of my life working for myself. I find I can't actually do a job all the time so this has been the solution thus far, that way I can accept work well I am in a state to and deline/postpone it when I'm not. I was hoping I to change that. I had been offered a full time position which I was hoping to start September 2014 (long way off I know). Right know I am feeling a need to review this idea. I am not really sure that it will work for me. Whilst in the one hand the regularity and consistence is great for my health I think it is too much stress. I am classically becoming sicker as the decades pass, with episodes being more intense and more debilitating. Anyway I would be super interested to hear about other people's work situations and how you manage this for yourselves so that I can gleam some ideas from your experiences. I'm not soliciting advice just stories :D Thank you so much :D

I ROCK :D


 November Minutes: 0
0
90
180
270
360
Page: 1 of (1)  

Report Innappropriate Post

Other Living with Bipolar Disorder General Team Discussion Forum Posts

Topics:
Last Post:
3/31/2018 4:45:29 PM
10/1/2018 11:00:48 AM
7/29/2018 9:57:59 PM
9/28/2017 10:17:50 AM
10/1/2018 12:16:26 AM



Thread URL: https://www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/team_messageboard_thread.asp?board=0x1831x54132827

Review our Community Guidelines