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SHANNONY84's Photo SHANNONY84 SparkPoints: (23,666)
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3/7/13 2:09 A

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I to freeze up. I am told it is because of my brain injury. I find that removing myself from the situation and re-entering it again often works!

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KIMBERLY0916's Photo KIMBERLY0916 SparkPoints: (117,231)
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12/26/12 11:18 P

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hey there. welcome back. at the moment i'm too exhausted to think of specifics... but often i feel the same as you describe... overwhelmed by input.. things to do... things to see .. places to visit.. tasks to do.. phone calls to make ... it's never-ending sometimes

but often i just sit alone at the computer in my room and occasionally my cat jumps in my lap.

when i'm able i make task/todo lists. anything from pen and paper to a sheet in Excel or a Tasks program on my phone that syncs with Google Calendar. even if i throw a million things on there you can start to visualize the whole picture and then narrow down on priority or important stuff... it takes time but the list does whittle to nothing.

awhile back my counselor suggested some 5-minute thing. try something for 1 or 5 minutes and see how it goes. re-evaluate at 5 minute intervals to see if the task is beneficial, happy, useful and if not set it aside and come back another time.

super sorry that your "friends" are that way. if you were able to open your own downtown studio and stay afloat then you should be praised! and complimented! and not stolen from. have you contacted you local paper or groups about holding an open house? are your designs able to be copywrite or trademarked? i don't know all the specifics about keeping people from stealing your work.

How are you measuring your year? Speeding tickets, cups of coffee, love


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RAINRUNNER5's Photo RAINRUNNER5 SparkPoints: (0)
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12/26/12 7:53 P

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Hi all, I'm back - if ya' remember me ...

Anyway, I'm having a problem of just not being able to do anything, just freezing up and being so overwhelmed that even chore lists or what I could do go out of my head. I just sit quietly, go to sleep, or lay there - just space out.

The holidays are really tough on me. There is so much input.

I don't have much family left alive (I'm 37) - so xmas is hard. But this year I'm fortunate and was able to launch my art studio and am making posters. I have a large scale poster printer and studio downtown. It's really cool. But - the 'friends' I do have just say things like, "it costs too much" and "why do you need that anyway, why not just stay home" and when I post a new work they never say anything like - hey nifty.

I don't have any friends here really, just my old ones that are on Facebook. I hoped that if I did get a studio downtown I would meet some people and become more social.

I feel a lot of loneliness in the studio. It's a happiness and I would really like to share it and have people be happy too. When they just act jealous and weird about it, I feel more alone then ever.

There is also this dip trying to steal more art work again, about every three months he buys a $10 print from me, scans it in, claims he's fixed TONS and TONS of errors in it and bad mouths me on various forums and then he releases the "fixed print" open sourced, free of charge. I wish he could have chilled out for the holidays. He has various people try to nick the print from me this time, but it has his shipping address on it so yeah - I figured it out. lol.

So I'm all alone in my studio and the only support from fans is this guys followers on his forum complimenting my photography. (I think we can steal it from her photos!)

My kids are about grown so I was really just gutted this year I guess, because now I can count the fingers left before they're all grown up. And I don't know what I'll do without them. All their gifts were big kid things, my ex has a little girl so I sent her a stuffed dog.

So maybe me not moving is about making time stop. I don't want to move forward, I don't want things to change. I'm finally happy, albeit very lonely, but I finally don't live in poverty and I'm loved and I spend time with my kids a lot more than I used to be able to when I worked all the time. I seize up, I stop, I can't move forward and sometimes I just lay down for hours doing nothing.

There seems to be a million things I should be doing like a kalaidescope in my mind all competing for attention. It gets so loud, and so anxious, and I just shut down.

Sorry for the therapy session, I'm just trying to make sense of it all and there is no one really to talk to. I'm trying to get back to the gym, trying to eat right, just one toe infront of the other but by about 3pm, I'm gone. All my energy spent just fighting to go forward.


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