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LITHIUMDRAGON's Photo LITHIUMDRAGON Posts: 520
3/16/08 3:44 P

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Thanks for all your support! Just when I thought I was alone and that staying on track was going to be impossible, you guys reminded me why I started this journey in the first place. Thankyou so very much for sharing your stories!

Melissa
Abbotsford, BC
"Growing old is mandatory but growing up is optional!"


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KRISTAP1030's Photo KRISTAP1030 SparkPoints: (0)
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3/15/08 7:47 P

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I am the same way as you. I am a stay at home/work at home mommy to 3 kids ages 5, 3, and 6 months, so I refuse to go to the gym because I don't want to "take time out" and have my hubby who works all day, have to take care of them. Its cold here in MA, and we do have a couple pieces of exercise equipment, and when I put in an exercise tape or what ever, I find I don't feel so bad if I include my kids in with it. Also on the rare nice day we have, I try to take the kids for a walk, or I take the kids out and play tag with them or kick ball or something to get me "going"



*****childrens clothing 40%-60% below wholesale. Check it out http://www.magickidsusa.com and use coupon code mk41567-kp @ checkout for added discounts*****



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JAMJ59's Photo JAMJ59 SparkPoints: (0)
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3/15/08 12:52 A

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Lith - like everyone else said, you ARE doing this for your family. Is there any better gift you can give than for you to be healthy? You're obviously a caring person, now start caring for yourself. When you become happy with yourself, everything you have to offer others is so much better.

And Kez, wasn't your hubby judging YOU when he was upset with your choices of food? Maybe you were just forcing him to see that he wasn't happy with his own choices. It sounds like you've led by example if he's starting to make that change now. You should be very proud of yourself!

If we can all remember that it's not selfish to take care of ourselves and get healthy, we'll pull through this one day at a time!

emoticon

JJ
"I'm too blessed to be stressed!"

A coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous.


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RAVON27's Photo RAVON27 SparkPoints: (61,822)
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3/14/08 9:14 A

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I use to feel guilty when I lived with my kids and they were little. I would never do anything for myself. The older I got the easier it was. I went to school in my 40's and took drum lessons. I watched my kids get excited for me. I showed them that it didn't matter how old you were, or if you were a "mom", you could do what you wanted. Now that I'm losing weight and my kids are in their 20's they say they are proud of me for the things I do and the things I've done. You have to realized that if you don't take care of yourself you CAN"T take care of anyone else. It's not being selfish, it's making yourself stronger to deal with your life. You wouldn't put off going to the doctor because you felt selfish about taking care of yourself, would you? Just think of what you would say to someone else if they wrote the same thing you just did and say it to yourself : ) Good Luck!

-Ruth-

Vegetarian 8/15/07
Vegan 8/30/08

Breathe. Let Go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure - Oprah Winfrey

ruthruminates.blogspot.com/


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KEFRAJO's Photo KEFRAJO Posts: 421
3/14/08 7:29 A

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They way i feel guilt is slightly different, when me and my hubby go for a meal out i feel guilty for wanting to eat healthy when he wants other things! he's a large man himself but never really bothered (until a week ago now he wants to start loosing weight!) So when we went for a meal out he would start an argument with me when i wanted a salad or low fat item, saying it made him feel like im judging him with what he wants and makes him feel uncomfortable when dinning out! I never intended to do that i was making decisions for me! So i have never forgotten that moment and now feel guilty at wanting to eat healthy, sometimes i even just order 'bad' foods so i make sure he doesn't feel like im judging him...Im slowly learning not to feel the guilt but when you love someone its hard!

Kez

'Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going'

"Reach for the sky, hold your head up high, cause tonight and every night, your a superstar"


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BEV17293's Photo BEV17293 Posts: 901
3/13/08 10:49 P

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Hi Lithiumdragon,

I've walked a mile in your shoes. You are doing this for your family. They want a healthy mom who has the energy to laugh. Maybe even make a fun healthy meal for all of you because you have the energy. I have an autistic child and I was on duty
24/7 because he was never diagnosed and I did everything myself. Here is my mistake so you don't have to repeat it. At night when there is nothing you can do about the situation. Take the evening off from worrying. There is nothing you can do in the evening to solve the problem. You might want to get a binder and keep a phone log of who you talked to and what was discussed and what action is to be taken. I find as I get older, I just can't remember all the details. And life can get pretty complicated. Sparkpeople is wonderful because they do the work for you and keep the log.
You'll do great! Like Red/Green says "we're all in this together". I'm 60 years old now, I've suffered for too many years of never being healthy. I could
have avoid several surgeries if I would have eaten
healthy foods.

Bonny Bev. emoticon Water is most important!

In harmony, Bev.

2-13-08 195 lb W40/H46
02-19-09 179lb
W36/H42
03-12-09 180lb
W36/H42
05-13-09 181.5lb W36/H42
07-13-09 185lb W39/H43


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NEILITHIC's Photo NEILITHIC Posts: 1,936
3/13/08 10:38 P

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I sometimes feel guilty too because I work 8 hours a day and then exercise on top of that, I'd like to spend more time during the day with my wife and son but in the end I'm doing it for them becuase if I didn't I'd just get fatter and fatter until I would end up having a heart attack by 50. Perhaps if you got your exercise including your kids, go for a walk with them or a bike ride or something you wouldn't feel as guilty.

What's the difference between ignorance and apathy?

don't know, don't care.


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LITHIUMDRAGON's Photo LITHIUMDRAGON Posts: 520
3/13/08 10:16 P

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I started this weight loss journey, not because I really wanted to, but because everyone else wanted me to. I admit I felt gross and lethargic and hated the way I looked but I didn't want to make some grand commitment to losing 20lbs just in case I couldn't do it. So now I'm on this journey and I've lost 8.5 lbs but for some reason I feel selfish when I take an hour out of my day to exercise. I think about my fiance who works 10 hours a day and I think I should be doing something more productive. So I clean the house instead and look after the kids. I work two jobs and I'm trying to finish my BA. Could someone tell me why doing things for me makes me feel guilty? Why do I feel the need to sacrifice everything for my family? Am I the only one that feels like this?

Edited by: LITHIUMDRAGON at: 3/13/2008 (22:15)
Melissa
Abbotsford, BC
"Growing old is mandatory but growing up is optional!"


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