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LEASIM1231's Photo LEASIM1231 Posts: 327
8/16/16 4:56 A

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Hi! I just joined this team, since it perfectly matches my situation. I am 31 years old. I would like to lose 8 more lbs. I was 150 last month and would like to get to 140. I'm 5'5. To some people 10 lbs doesn't sound like much, but it is extremely difficult for me to lose that.

I know what a difference these pounds can make in my clothes! So here is to another attempt and losing these pesky pounds. I've done it before, so I can do it again!

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BEARMOM80 Posts: 4
4/22/16 8:25 P

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Totally understand! I have a tiny frame, so my extra 10ish lbs makes me feel horrible and makes my back hurt. Especially since when I'm heavier, it normally means I've stopped exercising and I'm not in good shape. (I don't care what you weigh, when you can't climb a flight of stairs without huffing and puffing like I do right now - you AREN'T in shape!)

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3/4/16 11:26 A

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I feel you on that! I don't understand why my personal decision to lose 5-10 lbs is so offensive. The only thing I can think is that the others assume judgement- well if she thinks she needs to lose weight then what about ME? Sorry... it's not about you! Weight loss is a personal journey!

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WATERPARKMAMA Posts: 54
2/9/16 10:36 A

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I know that this post is old, but it describes how I feel perfectly. It seems to personally offend people when they find out I am trying to lose a few pounds. I want to lose 5-10 pounds to feel better about myself and fit into my clothes better. That is my choice and it is personal one. It should be no one's business except my own. I don't announce it or tell anyone straight out, it's just when I pass on the doughnuts or muffins that my coworkers bring in, they get offended that I choose to eat a piece of fruit instead. Or when the office decides to order in and I decline and eat the healthy lunch I've brought.

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QWESTING's Photo QWESTING SparkPoints: (51,558)
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10/3/15 5:31 P

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What a lovely thread!

I've just started working in a hospital where sugar is kept behind the coffee bar, ordered a coffee with sugar next to a colleague I'd just met - instantly got, 'YOU take sugar!?! Maybe I need to do that - you're tiny!' then last week in a training session I got comments of the 'is that all you're eating? That isn't a meal!' kind from the same woman when I chose salad rather than a sandwich at a training session.

Apparently, if you're thin and healthy, it's fair enough for people to scrutinise every food decision you make. Imagine though if I'd turned to this woman and said - 'sandwich AND crisps! When you're really quite big already...!' Or pointed out one sugar in my coffee hardly equalled the pastry she opted for.

It's annoying and self conscious making. I'm fit, active, healthy and I eat healthily because I like it, and eat treats without feeling guilty about it because I rarely eat when I'm not hungry, and that works well for me. I would find it rude to comment on anyone's eating unless I was really seriously concerned and I'd appreciate the same courtesy. I know fit people are becoming the minority, sadly, but that doesn't make overeating something you should be practically shamed into!

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JLYNN459's Photo JLYNN459 Posts: 116
10/2/15 10:55 A

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I realize this post is old but I understand completely. I'm 5'3 and back when I was 150-165 people always told me I needed to lose weight. For my own reasons completely, I gave up added sugar and alcohol and most processed foods, and lost 50 pounds. I did this all without exercising. I am 114 pounds right now and those same people now tell me I"m too thin. I have checked out my weight, body fat percentage, and BMI and all three are perfect for my height, weight, and age. While I may be too thin for their preference, I"m not living for them and health wise I'm great. I'm sure they couldn't say the same. I'm starting to exercise now and should people complain, i will explain that weight loss is not the only reason for exercise. It's for health too. When they complain about my diet, I explain that it makes me feel my best, has alleviated my depression (and a long list of other issues) and is full of fresh healthy food. I won't let them deter me. I am doing what's best for me. They can have their McDonald's if they want. Just don't force me to eat it.

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KIES779 Posts: 22
5/4/14 12:29 P

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I set a goal of running a 5k this year, so using this goal as an explanation for training/working out helps.
More people question why I track my food. Some people think that you only need to track if you're trying to lose weight. I track because I want to ensure I'm getting the right balance of nutrition, especially because I have special dietary restrictions.
It is frustrating when people ask this, but in the end, how do YOU feel from the healthy lifestyle choices? I feel great, and sometimes that's the answer that I give. "Because it makes me feel good."

NOTBACKINGDOWN's Photo NOTBACKINGDOWN SparkPoints: (1,643)
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4/24/14 9:00 A

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I'm so glad I stopped to read this thread!! So many of you have posted the very same social interactions and personal thoughts that I have had! It is nice to know I'm not alone. At 5'6" and around 140#, everyone thinks I look fine... Why are you trying to lose weight, I've tried to explain it is more about being healthy and fit... but the message falls on deaf ears.

Edited by: NOTBACKINGDOWN at: 4/24/2014 (09:00)
Backing down, is NOT an option!
Anna
JESLHAR14's Photo JESLHAR14 SparkPoints: (3,106)
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4/16/14 10:45 A

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wow I used to get this all the time back when I was 138ish. I have a muscular build so I guess I've always looked like I weigh less than I do.

Over the years I've learned that it's not always best to mention your weightloss efforts - and more about giving an excuse that doesn't make anyone think twice. I recently started having digestive issues...namely when I eat junk. So now I tell people my stomach is sensitive and I can't eat a bunch of junk or I'll be sick. It works!

Maybe try something new and ask them why they think you are crazy?
As them...
Is healthy eating at 8pm (and then going to bed)?
Is healthy eating the cake?
Is healthy eating when you aren't hungry?
Is healthy sitting on the couch -- relaxing all night after work?
Is healthy drinking 4 sodas a day?
Is healthy eating fast food all the time?

I mean...usually the people that bring it up have no clue about proper nutrition or exercise. Nor do they know that both are important to health!

Well....now that I've ranted here for awhile...lol I'll be on my way!

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LIVEEASYRUNHARD's Photo LIVEEASYRUNHARD Posts: 4
4/14/14 8:07 A

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I love this thread! It's so true. I'm only 5'2" and stocky so any extra weight makes me look rectangular! But everyone seems to feel the need to comment on my food choices.

It's the same with alcohol. I don't drink, and some people seem to feel it is their duty to force me to.

There's only one reason people do this, and that's because our choices are making them feel bad about themselves. They don't want to be made to feel guilty, so consciously or subconsciously they try to stop that by making us eat unhealthily or drink. Phew, problem solved (for them!)

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LUST4LIFE15's Photo LUST4LIFE15 Posts: 4,364
9/8/13 7:59 P

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I don't think should have to defend myself. I take full responsibility for my actions and eating habits....no one controls me but me. Let other people talk~it's usually because they have their own issues (mostly jealousy). I don't feel like should explain myself to someone who is "two-faced" either.

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LIZAPO's Photo LIZAPO Posts: 878
9/8/13 11:09 A

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You don't have to defend yourself ..you can't please people and let them talk. Find that inner strength that we all have but let people push it down...I tell people all the time that I will not defend myself you and really mean it. Negativity make me stronger. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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AJKOHL33 SparkPoints: (1,235)
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9/7/13 11:02 A

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I also just joined SP. I lost about 20 pounds back in March as a result of accepting a new position at work. I work in retail and found I was all of a sudden up and down ladders, walking like crazy and lifting heavy items constantly. I used a pedometer one day and discovered I was walking over 7 miles in an 8-hour shift! My struggle since unexpectedly losing this weight has been maintaining it, but in a way that I can be healthy. The comments from co-workers was incredibly frustrating. There were rumors that I had an eating disorder, there were dirty looks from some of the girls who are bigger but don't do anything to be healthy, and there were snide comments about how I could probably now shop in the girls department.
Trying to get people to understand that I'm trying to be healthier now that I'm in my thirties because of all of the health issues that can crop up is incredibly irritating. I do attribute a lot of it to jealousy. I was very concerned when I realized how rapidly I had lost the weight. I knew that there could be repercussions for such a significant weight loss in such a short span of time. It's a relief to see other people have had the same struggles. In a family where all of the women are significantly overweight, I don't get a lot of understanding.

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MELINDADEAL Posts: 6
8/3/13 3:49 A

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I just joined Spark and saw this Team Page. It made me so happy I almost cried. I have always been thin/slender/skinny. You name it, I've been called it. As I've tried to adjust my eating habits as I've gotten older, I always had to defend myself. No one ever seemed to understand that I want to prevent problems. Now I'm battling two issues. Since I've moved to Alaska, I have a waistline issue (only there, no where else), and my husband is gone for the next 4 months for training. I emotionally eat, and DON'T need to gain weight when I am so close to my goal. To meet people who understand is a first for me. Just so excited.

EXCIMER's Photo EXCIMER SparkPoints: (652)
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7/13/13 12:02 P

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Think about this
when you're 35 or 45 or 55 you'll be able to have some fun in some places because you maintained your temple while some of those people who've insulted you or insult you will be checking their blood pressure, in a wheel chair, using a cane, or worried about their multiple prescription meds.
Some of them may envy your physique many years from this moment,
So dont allow those people to eat away at you.

Gave up Fries as a side order since. And pursuing those beautiful females that serve me 'em.


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EXCIMER's Photo EXCIMER SparkPoints: (652)
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7/13/13 11:52 A

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I get that from some times too, but I'm a male. I caught in-between the hardsh double-standard which more and more people in their right mind are finally giving some attention to
in this nation.
I have a medical condition but some people are too stu... careless to pay attention to.

Gave up Fries as a side order since. And pursuing those beautiful females that serve me 'em.


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SQUIRRELMISSION's Photo SQUIRRELMISSION SparkPoints: (573)
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5/21/13 2:23 P

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my two cents: people who give you a hard time are jealous - plain and simple. they are jealous of your discipline, your tenacity, and it sheds light on themselves. so, bottom line, take it as a compliment. :) thats how i take it :)

Amy - "If it's imporant to you, you will find a way. if not, you will find an excuse."


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JOYFUL4ME's Photo JOYFUL4ME Posts: 23
1/10/13 12:21 P

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SUNNYNICCI-

I am not a negative person either. And tend to not hold people's comments against them. This thread just offered the opportunity to say "yes, I experience this too and I wish it didn't happen".
I have to remember that no one knows what struggles I have, just like I don't know what struggles others have.

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SUNNYNICCI's Photo SUNNYNICCI Posts: 115
1/10/13 10:45 A

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Joyful4me, I am not a negative person by nature, but I think what really makes people comment is underlying fear, embarassment, or jealousy. We are working towards a goal that others also struggle with, often secretly or subconsciously. :)

Started SparkPeople May 1, 2010.


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JOYFUL4ME's Photo JOYFUL4ME Posts: 23
1/9/13 2:00 P

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This has been such an enligtening thread for me!

I totally relate to all that is being said here. It can be so frustrating when you feel like you are being judged! I too have the ol' muffin top and dispise it! Plus, I am 38 with high blood pressure and fibromyalgia. When a person looks at me, they have no idea of my medical conditions. Eating healthier and doing exercise helps me FEEL better (and can help with that muffin top). Why do people think it is so wrong that I want to feel better?

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SUNNYNICCI's Photo SUNNYNICCI Posts: 115
1/9/13 10:48 A

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i know it's a year later, but I also have some input for you, Butterflibeauty... This really resonates with me, as well... the "look". I have been on SparkPeople for almost three years and experienced my first 'looks' right away. I decided to shape up to prevent all those health issues that plague my overweight family members and to look and feel better. When I reached my goal weight my coworkers had never seen me so slim and couldn't get used to it. They had always known me when I had extra weight on. I tried the reply "My clothes hide it well!" but that didn't work. So now when I get the 'look' or comments, I answer, "I am trying to prevent Type II diabetes that runs in my family." BINGO everyone can understand that struggle and respect it. On a side note, my co-workers often comment on how 'healthy' I eat in the breakroom and it seems to impress them. Weird, huh?

Edited by: SUNNYNICCI at: 1/9/2013 (10:49)
Started SparkPeople May 1, 2010.


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GAMEDUTCHESS's Photo GAMEDUTCHESS SparkPoints: (781)
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1/6/13 5:40 P

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There are a lot of people in this world who view exercise and eating healthy as only something people trying to lose wt do. I have also found that a lot of over wt and obese people think just because someone is thin it is because they have a fast metabolism or an eating disorder.

I have more than a lot been given the "look" for talking about my love of exercise or desire to lose a few lbs.



Take Pride!!


CHERFER2 Posts: 20
1/6/13 5:20 P

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totally understand! I'm always told by obese family members that I'm "a toothpick" or "skin and bones". I don't even respond.

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SMLAPINSKI's Photo SMLAPINSKI SparkPoints: (0)
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1/4/13 12:21 P

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I have also totally struggled with the "look" all of my life, as well. It always comes from others who are struggling with being overweight. I try to explain to them that people do not get overweight overnight...that it takes a long time, and that my goal is prevention, as it is easier to keep off the weight than to take it off after gaining it. They seem to understand what I am trying to say once this is explained.

Unfortunately, I have always been a VERY "healthy" (as in a lot of food) eater, and my metabolism has finally changed over the past 1-2 yrs, so I am having to redefine how much I "should" eat, so I don't continually gain weight. Blessings to all!!

Blessings!!
Melissa www.FHLChristianCounseling.com


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KRANGARA SparkPoints: (0)
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7/26/12 10:33 A

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I think 131 lbs is a good, healthy weight for your age (I am 31 too, but around 150 lbs *sigh*). You should work on just maintaining this weight :)

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7/26/12 10:31 A

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I empathize completely. But my situation is slightly more complicated because I was suffering from an Eating Disorder some three years ago. I won't say that I am completely cured. Emotionally, I am still struggling to have a healthy body image, but, physically, I am okay. Nonetheless, I'd like to lose those10 extra pesky pounds, but am always met with 'you are ridiculous' stares. I cannot talk about losing weight without being treated like an Anorexic, which is frustrating. Will that always be my identity?

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7/26/12 7:27 A

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I've never run into this particular issue and I think it's because I never use nor allow the phrase "lose weight" to be said about what I'm doing. I say I'm improving my health/fitness. No one questions or argues. If they start to mention weight, it's very easy to simply point out I just feel better when I eat well and use my body. It helps my mind set too, since I end up reminding myself what my goal really is!

ELYRIADANZIG's Photo ELYRIADANZIG SparkPoints: (0)
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6/28/12 10:03 A

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Another random thought about the word skinny.

Ladies' night with the girls last weekend; one of the girls brought up the fact that I'd asked her about the 1,000 calorie diet her doctor had put her on before surgery. I'd asked her because I was looking for ideas for low-calorie meals. (This was before I'd joined SparkPeople.)

"Why? You're so skinny," she spat.

No, skinny is underweight. Skinny is unhealthy.

I am currently within a healthy weight range for someone with my build. And you know what? If I lose five pounds, ditch the muffin top, ditch the double chin, and become more fit, I will STILL be within a healthy weight range for someone with my build. And I'll have some tone, and my jeans will fit me again. And there's nothing wrong with that. Or becoming a healthier person, ever.

Yet we have this snark.

I'm getting some tone. I have more energy. So something is obviously working. I'll keep it to myself from now on and chalk it up to jealousy on the part of others.

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BELLAGAIA's Photo BELLAGAIA Posts: 11
6/24/12 4:36 A

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Yep ... same thing here. I just don't tell anyone that I'm trying to lose a few anymore. As for what "healthy" is, I think that depends on what feels right to *you*. We're losing these last few pounds for ourselves anyway, right? Not for anyone else! So, IMO, they don't need to know.

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KLFOLLM's Photo KLFOLLM SparkPoints: (0)
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6/13/12 9:44 A

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So nice to read these comments, as I am in the same boat! I know that a key factor to weight loss is support from friends and family, but I don't ever to talk to anyone about it because of the reactions I get. My husband is the only one who knows I'm working on this last couple of pounds, and even he said I didn't need to. It almost feels like I'm hiding something bad.

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ELYRIADANZIG's Photo ELYRIADANZIG SparkPoints: (0)
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5/29/12 11:30 A

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Some great points here! I too just flat out LIKE the way I look when I am 10lbs lighter. I don't dig the double chin or muffin top I've got going on, and I want my favorite jeans to fit again. Apparently weight loss is only valid in this society if you're obese.

Keeping my fitness goals to myself from now on, though my coffee server is still on about how I'm so skinny and don't need to lose weight.

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CHERUBDANCER's Photo CHERUBDANCER SparkPoints: (0)
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5/20/12 6:40 A

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Oh, I can so relate!

I'm pretty small as I am, and I know I don't "need" to lose weight. If I tell people I'm trying to watch what I eat and drop a few, people look at me like I'm crazy. I'm not doing it because I think I have extra pounds, but because I want to be as fit as I can be, feel even better, and have more energy. That, and it's complete vanity -- I just like the way I look when I'm very lean and cut.

I've found that if I don't say I'm trying to lose weight, but if I'm supportive and offer encouragement and to be an "eat healthy and workout buddy" to people who mention they are trying to lose, no one calls that crazy. :)

Since we have almost gotten there, we can give back. For me, being a coach/mentor/role model to someone else helps me stay accountable, so it's a win-win.

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MRS_ASCOTT's Photo MRS_ASCOTT SparkPoints: (0)
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5/19/12 2:17 P

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I've always been slender and the ladies in my family are always commenting about how they wished they had my figure, etc. so I never mention anything about weight. I always try to redirect the discussion towards health and a strong body. I also point out older family members' failing health and how I'd like to do what I can for myself now to prevent that and demonstrate a healthy lifestyle for my girls. I am certainly within a healthy weight range, but I'm flabby around the middle with skinny limbs. I know I can look better and there is no reason why I shouldn't be able to, just because I am not overweight.

~Amanda

"There are only two choices; make progress or make excuses."
Ellen Mikesell


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PERKIMOTH's Photo PERKIMOTH SparkPoints: (0)
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5/13/12 9:26 A

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I very much sympathise! I'm around a size 12 on an average day and would like to be back to a size 10 (UK sizes). Yet, according to one family member, I'm small enough... I can't mention my weight without being treated like I have an eating disorder! I've hated my 'muffin' for long enough, what's wrong with wanting rid!!! I want back into less clothes for the summer at least. Drives me mad that I can't talk about my achievments. Medically I have to change my diet and it's given me the kick start to start taking more time to look at my food intake and increase my exercise.

Just know that you're doing this for yourself and forget about everyone else. Eventually they will accustom to your lifestyle change.

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LACIE444 SparkPoints: (0)
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5/12/12 10:04 A

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Ugh I get that ALL the time. Very annoying. Lately, I have come to realize if I cut in ahead, as soon as the look starts creeping up and their mouth starts to open, I jump in with yes I know I am not I am not trying to actually "loose" weight just tone up. They usually tend to shut up and agree with that one... just makes life slightly easier!

ELYRIADANZIG's Photo ELYRIADANZIG SparkPoints: (0)
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5/11/12 10:58 A

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Well, well! I had my first one of these remarks this morning, on my second day in!

The awesome person who has been pouring my coffee for the past five years was shocked when today I ordered a small coffee instead of my usual medium--it starts with little steps like these, right?

They asked why, of course, and I said I needed to drop five pounds. That's when I got the look.

So now of course I have to explain myself, because to them, I don't look like I need to lose weight. I know I am still within a healthy weight range, but my clothes aren't fitting me any more. And I am not buying new ones.

I think they were just bummed because they have been walking a lot and working out to no avail. Believe me, I know the feeling--I'm hoping this time it will be different.

Didn't realize a coffee would cause such an uproar!

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KATCURRENT's Photo KATCURRENT Posts: 21
1/11/12 2:27 P

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Maur,

Good luck with your fitness goals! It's amazing what a difference 5 or 10 pounds can make. When I get over 133, my lower back kinks up a bit, and when I've been in the high 130's, I've sometimes pulled my back. And it's not because I'm overweight at those numbers, I'm just out of balance for my body.

There are some good resources in runners and triathletes magazines about how to go from fit to really fit and lean. One is called "Racing Weight: How to get Lean for Peak Performance."

L.K. (5'6", 36 years)
136 lbs beginning 12/01/2011
Goal weight = 124 lbs


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MAUR5683 SparkPoints: (0)
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1/11/12 1:58 P

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I totally agree. Just because I am thinner, does not mean I still do not have a few pounds to lose. I can notice when I have not been working out enough for sure. I am 136 right now and I want to get to 125 and I am 5'4''. I will never be rail thin, I have a decent amount of muscle and people are shocked that I weight 136. Most people think I weigh 110. So when I say I am watching my weight, they are shocked. Well screw them. I am healthy, I watch what I eat and I work out at least 5 days a week. I think there should be a work out show for people who want to go from healthy by the charts to elite fitness level. I am a huge "biggest loser" fan, I mean I would love to get on a show and have access to the best nutrition and fitness training!

KATCURRENT's Photo KATCURRENT Posts: 21
1/10/12 11:24 P

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Thanks folks, I appreciate your support! Our society is very weight/size phobic, I think. Just look at the celebrity magazines. They have 1 story after another about who is too fat or too thin. We're taught to police one another.

With my weight goal, I've decided not to change it (I've had it set at 128, and I'm keeping it there). But I'm going to make that my lower limit. Since most people have a 3-5 pound weight range, I'll consider 128 the bottom of that instead of the middle. It seems like my weight loss is naturally slowing down right now, anyway.

The main food changes I want to work on include drinking more water and eating out less. I'm signed up for the challenge to cook 2 recipes per week.

Hope folks are having a great week!

L.K. (5'6", 36 years)
136 lbs beginning 12/01/2011
Goal weight = 124 lbs


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1/9/12 1:36 A

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Laura and OBX, I feel you. I'm 5'1" and about 115, which is a very normal to slim weight for someone my height. But I've still got a muffin top I'm tired of having to dress around and would like to get rid of. I don't talk much about my recent efforts to get in shape because to most people, I'm already in great shape. Plus, I don't want people to think I have an eating disorder or something. It's not easy to talk about, especially since so many people are actually overweight.

Thanks for the encouragement that I'm not alone or crazy.

 Pounds lost: 3.2 
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MEIGHANOTT's Photo MEIGHANOTT Posts: 15
1/8/12 11:24 P

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Laura,

From what you wrote, it looked like you were in the healthy range, but I checked just to be sure. Well, look at that: 20.5 - 21.1 BMI, depending on if you're closer to 5'6" or 5'7". Healthy range is 18.5 - 24.9, so you're well within those boundries.

Now, as far as body fat goes, average women should be in the 25-31% range or 21-24% if they exercise regularly. Athletes get into the 14-20% range. If you're a runner, I could see why your body fat would be low. But, it doesn't seem like you're in a dangerously low range.

I don't know. It's a tough call. I'm definitely not a doctor, but just going on those numbers, you seem fine. I've gone to my doctor earlier this year with a BMI of 19.3 (131 lbs at 5'9") and body fat of 18.5% and she was perfectly happy with where I was at. You know yourself best and if you're not prone to illness and you feel healthy, that definitely counts for something. :)

 current weight: 151.6 
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JUZDANCE's Photo JUZDANCE Posts: 47
1/8/12 2:22 A

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It's enough to make you want to gain weight so your loved one's will be happy. Wait...sounds like sabotage when I say that out loud.

They say " it must be nice" being naturally thin,which completely undermines all my hard work,and makes me feel guilty,which makes me feel like eating a cookie.

Edited by: JUZDANCE at: 1/10/2012 (16:18)
You got this!


KATCURRENT's Photo KATCURRENT Posts: 21
1/7/12 10:35 A

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Yesterday, I saw the doctor for an unrelated checkup, and she chided me for losing 5 pounds (I went from 136 to 131, I'm 5'6"-5'7"). She says I'm lean enough. My body fat is around 19- 20%, and she thinks I need a couple pounds buffer in case I get sick or something. It really took me aback. After the appointment, I immediately went out and "proved" I'm not wasting away by eating fajitas with guacamole and popcorn with extra butter at the movies.

I would really appreciate input from any of you. Do you think I should bump up my goal weight to 130? Or maybe choose a 5 pound range of 128-132? My low weight was 120 in college and my high weight was 145 when I got my first office job after finishing college. Right now, I feel and look good at 131. If I lost 2 or 3 more, I'd be svelte, which appeals to me, but there's nothing wrong with my current weight.

If I sound obsessive, that's because I am. :P It's an eerie feeling when you feel like you're doing something healthy for yourself and another person accuses you of self-harm.

Anyway, Happy weekend!!

Edited by: KATCURRENT at: 1/7/2012 (10:36)
L.K. (5'6", 36 years)
136 lbs beginning 12/01/2011
Goal weight = 124 lbs


 Body Fat %: 138.0
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MEIGHANOTT's Photo MEIGHANOTT Posts: 15
1/6/12 10:52 P

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I'm sorry you are all having to deal with this, but relieved to see that I'm not alone. I'm 5'9" and hover around the 135 lb mark. I don't dare tell anyone I'm watching my calorie intake and would like to be 128-130 lbs. I've gotten comments like, "You really lost a lot of weight. Did you mean to?" I guess some of my family members thought I might have some sort of illness. I may be on the lower end of the healthy range on the BMI scale but I'm not skinny. I've got a bit of a belly to work on and, having slacked off on exercise a bit lately, I really need to tone up.

I really wish I could be more open with family and friends about SparkPeople and my results, but food and exercise is sort of a touchy subject now. Decline a snack or dessert and I get sarcastic remarks or family members gossiping about what's "really going on" with me.

Phew! Glad to get that off my chest. It is nice to know there are others out there. Honestly, they were starting to give me a complex!

 current weight: 151.6 
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RACHELMINOR SparkPoints: (0)
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1/3/12 1:27 P

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I have also had this type of experience. I was actually put on the spot by about 6 "friends" figuring I had an eating disorder. I have never been more embarrassed in my life!! We are all a bunch of nursing students and we were at an orientation to a clinical site. I had a meal replacement bar with and didn't want to spend the money on going out to lunch. WOW, you would have thought the world was going to end!!! They were asking how many calories I ate per day, how much I exercised...ect. It was horrible. I think that being slightly fluffy is the norm now, and I just know I feel better when I'm thinner (it also keeps my blood pressure in check) I guess people need to learn to mind their own business when they don't have all the facts.

 current weight: 137.0 
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KATCURRENT's Photo KATCURRENT Posts: 21
12/5/11 1:04 A

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I used to get this, too. I'm not sure why other people care about other people's body sizes. One thing I noticed is that when I spoke in a more casual, easy going way about food plans - while still staying firm to my own guidelines - other people stopped countering me. I think people used to react to what they saw in me as a self-punitive attitude. It was a self-fulfilling prophecy. I went in with a defensive attitude, then others responded to it and actually did become a bit combative.

I don't have many friends like this anymore. I do have a couple. A while ago, I went out for tea with a friend of mine. It was about 8 pm, and I always eat dinner early. She decided she actually didn't want tea, she wanted Chinese food, and I told her I'd already eaten. So, we went for food, and I drank tea. She kept asking me, "Aren't you going to get anything?" I just said, "No, I don't like to eat when I'm not hungry." I made it a point not to look at what she was eating, because I think she felt like I was judging her, which I wasn't. I don't care what other people eat or at what time of day. But people - especially friends - need to respect my right to take care of myself in the ways that work for me.

Edited by: KATCURRENT at: 12/5/2011 (01:06)
L.K. (5'6", 36 years)
136 lbs beginning 12/01/2011
Goal weight = 124 lbs


 Body Fat %: 138.0
138
134.5
131
127.5
124
NZFITNESS's Photo NZFITNESS Posts: 426
11/17/11 3:54 P

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Hi there BUTTERFLIBEAUTY,

Many thanks for your message and welcome to the forum.

Sadly you experience what many do when friends and family do not help supporting your new lifestyle. Many mean well, but can sabotage all of your hard efforts if listened to. They don't know what it's like do they? Looking at your new lifestyle, it looks like you have incorporated a very healthy plan of calorie control and exercise each week so well done you and please keep going with it. The results will come and your health will benefit considerably.

In the meantime please read the following spark article below for some tips on how to handle your difficult friends.

https://www.sparkpeople.com/resource/arti
cles_print.asp?id=1685

All the best,

Carl

NZFITNESS's Photo NZFITNESS Posts: 426
11/17/11 3:54 P

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Hi there BUTTERFLIBEAUTY,

Many thanks for your message and welcome to the forum.

Sadly you experience what many do when friends and family do not help supporting your new lifestyle. Many mean well, but can sabotage all of your hard efforts if listened to. They don't know what it's like do they? Looking at your new lifestyle, it looks like you have incorporated a very healthy plan of calorie control and exercise each week so well done you and please keep going with it. The results will come and your health will benefit considerably.

In the meantime please read the following spark article below for some tips on how to handle your difficult friends.

https://www.sparkpeople.com/resource/arti
cles_print.asp?id=1685

All the best,

Carl

BUTTERFLIBEAUTY Posts: 134
11/17/11 7:52 A

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What do you say to the people who tell you that you are ridiculous, or give you the "look" because you are already "skinny" and want to exercise, or *gasp!* watch calories? It makes me crazy that I have to defend my decision to diet and exercise when I know that I have 10 lbs. that I could stand to lose because my clothes and muffin top tells me so! I have gotten this my whole life and am just so darn tired of it. Sure, there are people who are actually sick with anorexia, bulimia, those who over exercise, ect... but I am certain that I am not one of them. Currently I am eating 1500-1600 calories (sometimes more) to help my weight loss, and plan to up it to around 2100 once I met my goal weight. I exercise 5 days a week, 35 mins on the treadmill those days and twice a week I lift weights for about 35-40 mins each time. Obviously I have my head on straight and know what is good and bad for me. But I am so tired of the "look" just because I don't want a heaping serving of cheesy potatoes, or only want a small slice of dessert if any. No matter what I say to them it is always the wrong answer, and I know that who ever it is walks away thinking I have some serious health issues and all because I want to be as healthy as I can be?! Makes me so angry that just because I am not okay with being 10lbs over weight that I am the one with the problem. *HUFF*

Edited by: BUTTERFLIBEAUTY at: 11/17/2011 (08:01)
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