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CD4065383 Posts: 134
1/1/11 3:31 P

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I really hope you guys had a good visit, and I hope you realize how amazing 70 pounds lost really is.

I can relate to the anxiety that comes from being the big girl coupled with an average sized man. I'm always worried people will see us together and think "Man, he's so skinny compared to her! Does she ever let him eat?!?" My husband almost has me convinced (after being together over 6 years) that even though I'm not happy with my body at the moment he loves me for who I am and accepts whatever body comes with me. It sounds like you may have a guy who is just as understanding, and believe me, he is one in a million. Try to accept the idea that he can be happy with how you look even if you aren't quite there yet.

Again, 70 pounds in a year is really incredible. Even if it isn't the 100 pounds you were planning on, at least you're a whole lot closer to that 100 than you were last year. I have my goals set for losing 100 by next year, but truly I will accept anything over 50 without any regrets.

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12/15/10 11:01 A

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Thank you, Denise. 

I guess I have a hard time even seeing it, because I know I still have so much more to lose :(. And because I know if I had been more in control I could have lost more. 

I believe he truly loves me, but that doesn't mean he won't be disgusted with how my body looks without clothes :/. He is so wonderful, he tries to be understanding, but it's hard for him to really understand. I just want to have fun and enjoy the visit but all these doubts keep popping up and I feel myself just kind of distancing myself when he talks about the visit. 

12/15/10 10:59 A

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Hey there look at you!!!! Look at the work you have done! What an amazing defeat!! You may not have lost 100 pounds but you have lost 60 some!! You desereve a big WWOOOOOOHOOOOOO! I totally understand where you are coming from and I have been there recently myself. I have only lost 12 pounds in 6 months. But hey we are in a better spot than when we started. I think it may hurt a little afterwards but it sounds like you need to load up on some Ibuprofen(I have also been through the plantar facitis) and go get in a kick ass cardio workout of your choice!!! Start writing down what you are eating again, just like your starting fresh.

And you have a man that says he loves you. Take advantage of that. That is something special. Your not doing this for him, you are doing this for you! Don't be down and dumpy and ruin your time with him because you are not comfortable with who you are. Love yourself no matter where your at, and the happiness will follow.

Stop worrying and start doing. Don't let something so silly hold you back. You can do this!! You will do this!!

SW 346
CW 239
Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it is about learning to dance in the rain!

Believe when it is beyond reason to believe!!

Little motions make big waves!!

Ran the Dam to Dam 5k on June 5, 2010, 38min38sec
Clover Run 2 mile on July 3, 2010 21min 30 sec
Sheels Shoes that fit 5K August 28, 2010 33min 24sec
Susan G Komen Race for the Cure 5K 10-23-10 36min29sec-hard run HILLS!!
April 2011, Friendly Sons of Saint Patricks

 current weight: 235.0 
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12/15/10 10:49 A

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You have lost 60-70 pounds. In a year. Do you know how amazing that is??? Try lifting something that is even half of that weight, and it will give you a better idea of how much of your weight you have lost. That is PHENOMENAL.

While it's natural to always want more, it's so important to be able to appreciate what you have accomplished so far - to look at yourself and say that you haven't failed because you didn't lose 100 pounds, but that you succeeded because you lost 70. And that is a HUGE accomplishment.

As for your foot, just do what your body will allow you to do safely for now - and if you need to, maintain. Better to maintain than to let your confidence fall and to risk slipping back into old routines, for sure! There are bound to be setbacks, but it's learning to deal with the setbacks in the healthiest way possible that will make the things that you have learned become permanent lifestyle changes.

And as for the man you're meeting up with... enjoy the visit. While I know it's hard to see yourself physically as the person you are now vs. the person you had been for so long, it sounds like he really loves YOU. Enjoy that, and enjoy the moments you have with him. You completely deserve it!

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12/15/10 10:37 A

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Sigh. So I guess I'm in need of a serious confidence booster. I'm feeling really down on myself the past couple of days. 

I have always, ALWAYS been the fat girl. It wasn't something that just all the sudden happened over a year, it's been my whole life. 

This past January I made the decision to change. And I have. But I don't feel it's been enough, I could have done so much more, I could be so much further along in my journey. I've lost between 60-70 pounds this year. My goal was 100. If I hadn't had so many relapses... Sigh. 

About 5-6 weeks ago I had some extreme pain in my foot, turned out it was/is plantar facitis. Which meant that the 45-60 min cardio sessions I had been doing were a no go. Instead I had to stick to the bike, and only if it didn't hurt. 

It was amazing how devastated that made me. Funny how a year ago I would have taken any excuse possible not to walk down the drive way to get the mail. 

Anyway, I guess the whole foot thing set me back mentally. I continued to lose the first couple weeks, then it was gain, lose, gain. So I've pretty much lost nothing. And now my eating habits have gone down the drain, with my motivation. 

The other big thing weighing on my mind is that, in 8 days, the man who I have fallen head over heels for is driving 24 hours to spend the holidays with me. 

A man who is of average weight, and who j have known to always be attracted to the thin body type. But he says he loves me. He's beyond excited to be here. 

And me? I want him here, I do. But I look in the mirror and I still see the girl who was 60-70 pounds heavier. And I'm scared. Afraid of rejection. Afraid of losing this man who has become such a huge part of my life. 

He's seen my full body pictures.  But I really wonder if it's enough. 

Sigh :(

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