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ELOWEASLE's Photo ELOWEASLE SparkPoints: (0)
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4/11/11 12:27 P

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My biggest viscous cycle is that I'm really good Monday to Thursday. On Friday I allow myself to cheat,because I've done so well. However, on Saturday I always fail and eat crap food. Then I just tell myself that I might as well cheat all weekend and start again on Monday. This cycle continues (4 good days and 3 really bad days).

Before I decided to get serious about losing this weight, I found myself doing really ridiculous things; I'm living with a very skinny family and I hid chocolate in my room, because I thought
they would judge me when I ate it in front on them. I can't help but laugh at myself now. I should never have cared about what they thought.

You are right. When I lost the weight the first time, I was the only one in my family that was doing it. Whenever I went out for lunch with my sisters, they would pick a place that they knew would sell food that I could eat. Everyone is very understanding. My family stopped offering me biscuits with tea; so that I wouldn't be tempted. All of that really helped.

I'm finding it hard this time, because I'm overseas on my own and my 'very understanding' family is miles away. Sigh!

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__IZZA__ Posts: 981
4/11/11 7:34 A

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Even when I was in the beginning before on my weight loss I used to think that it doesn't matter if people think I am fat because now I am actually doing something to change it and I won't be fat anymore. I can't remember if I told my friends about it but they knew anyway since I only ate healthy things even when they didn't. If we were going to the cinema they bought sweets where as I brought my own healthy snacks. Even if it feels awkward in the beginning, people will get used to your healthy lifestyle and you can enjoy going out and be with people. You might even walk around with your friends and then get some more exercise to your day. If they truly are your friends they will support you.

 current weight: 165.0 
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MOONSTORMER's Photo MOONSTORMER Posts: 317
4/11/11 4:03 A

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it is a terrible situation to be in - i know it all too well! i think the first thing to do is to tell some (or even just one) of your friends what you are trying to do. this way, when they invite you out, you can have someone to help you with healthy decisions. i know most of my female friends are very aware of what they eat and are trying to lose weight - why not share an entree or starter when going out for dinner? or agree to have 1-2 drinks and then switch to water together? this will give you some solidarity in what you're doing without making a big deal of things. also, try to organize some social events that involve activity - mini-golf or bowling?

remember, you have to live your life! it's not as if life will begin when you are thin - there will be all kinds of other problems to deal with. besides, if you can't integrate healthy living into your lifestyle, there is no way to have a lifestyle without gaining weight.

emoticon be creative! what are the usual activities and foods associated? how can you do these in moderation? or, how can you accommodate it in your lifestyle? if i know that i am doing a beer and pizza night with my fiance, i make sure that during the day i eat healthily and go to the gym. that way i can get the pepperoni, and have a second or third drink without worrying about gaining any weight. if the girls want to go out for cocktails, i drink my usual gin and tonics, or switch to a bloody mary! no one can accuse you of being 'a wuss' or not drinking when you are having something with tabasco!

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MAL8672 Posts: 19
4/10/11 6:06 P

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See I get to the point where I tell myself I don't care anymore about going out and looking good, that I'll worry about it tomorrow. Somehow I've lost the motivation to want to work out- I see it as a chore now, and painful to get through. I used to work out so much, and loved being active, but now I've gained back all the weight I lost. It makes me feel so uncomfortable in my own skin that I don't want to go out with friends because I compare myself with every other girl. And then I eat to make myself feel good. I'll try to eat healthy and workout, but it only lasts for a day or two before I majorly trip up.

ELOWEASLE's Photo ELOWEASLE SparkPoints: (0)
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4/10/11 2:51 P

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I know what you mean. I only have one dress that I go out in. The rest make me feel fat and uncomfortable. I lost the weight over the last summer and it all found me again. I promised myself that I would never be this heavy again and I am back here. Sigh. I'm so frustrated! It doesn't help that I'm living with a skinny women who hardly eats.

I feel like I'm in Limbo and when I reach my goal weight, I'll start living again; be more confident and go out more.
You are right, you should start living now - during the weight loss journey - and watch yourself when you reach your goal. Because it's so easy to slip back into bad habits - especially when drinking and hangover food is involved.

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MAL8672 Posts: 19
4/10/11 2:49 P

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I feel the same way as both of you! I keep telling myself, I'll just lock down and push myself really hard to lose weight, and then I'll be able to go out and have fun. But I can't go out now because people will make fun of me, and whisper behind my back about how I look. I put so much pressure on myself to workout and eat healthy, that after a day or two of that I break down and just eat everything in sight to feel better. I don't know how to get out of this cycle! Help

ANG42J's Photo ANG42J SparkPoints: (0)
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4/9/11 9:45 P

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You hit the nail on the head "I just want to lose the weight and then go out and live". But you are right. Life can't stop because we are trying to become healthy. This isn't a temporary fix to a problem - it is a lifestyle change. And in our lives we are going to want to hang out with friends, go to the movies, have a beer!!! so we need to learn how to incorporate these things without punishing ourselves or going overboard. It is definitely a learning process. I'm glad that I am not alone here. I know it just takes time and patience but right now it's frustrating because I don't want to go out because "nothing fits" or because I feel like everyone is thinking "Omg she's gained weight". I should know better but it's hard when I know that is all I think when I see myself in the mirror.... Living and learning!

 current weight: 144.8 
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STEPHAB1218's Photo STEPHAB1218 Posts: 76
4/9/11 8:15 P

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I can relate to that EXACT feeling.... I just want to lose the weight and then go out and live, but I know I have to keep living along the way...I was here last year and lost 20+lbs, but had the same attitude, and as soon as I did start going out again, I lost my routine and pretty much gave up. Pretty much I learned my lesson the hard way cuz now I am almost back where I started. There has to be a balance I think, I am still working on finding it. But I know that becoming a recluse did me no good!!
Be proud of every single lb you shed, go out and live your life as healthfully as possible! Thats my goal this time around that way when I get to where I want to be, it wont be a shock to my body when I DARE drink a beer with the friends! LOL...
Goodluck you look wonderful!!



 current weight: 138.0 
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ANG42J's Photo ANG42J SparkPoints: (0)
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4/9/11 5:23 P

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...I find myself more and more avoiding social situations because I'm:

1. uncomfortable with the way I look/feel
2. I feel like it will cause me to deviate from my diet and fitness routine too much
3. I feel like i'm becoming more and more socially awkward and always feel worse when I get home anyways

BUT then I end up staying home and:

1. Binging (Which then negates reason number 2 above)
2. Not working out
3. Feeling sorry for myself (lonely, bored, fat, not pretty, etc. etc.)

So either way I end up feeling guilty about whichever decision I make!!! HELP!

 current weight: 144.8 
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