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ANYANP2's Photo ANYANP2 SparkPoints: (2,357)
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10/25/12 7:23 P

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Hi Jen, I did write you a reply but there was some sort of error and it lost the novel I typed.
Cant remember exactly what I said but I will do my best to remember most of it.
I have been in your position (or close to it) twice in my life. Once was 13 years ago and the most recent is right now.
Stress and Anxiety is what causes me to comfort eat, this leads to huge weight gain (went from 55-100kgs the first time. 69-98kgs this time), when I start to not be able to fit my clothes (and even worse, burst the seams of the clothes I can still squeeze into) I get very low self esteem and depression, this leads to compulsive eating.
I think the key for you is to find out why you are compulsively eating... rather than focusing on what or how much you are eating.
Was there a stress or something that happened 10 years ago? It could have happened any time before that but only surfaced 10yrs ago.
For me the first time it was a no brainer... I was a teen mum, on my own with no family or support. This caused massive stress and anxiety.. which I dont deal with well and only start to notice once I get to the edge.
This time, it was no so easy to work out. I have everything going for me, I have a wonderful family, supportive partner, 2 great kids, our own home... from the outside looking in, it seems as if I have everything a person could hope for. It turns out that this time it is feelings from when I was little coming to the surface. I am told that because things have been going so well over the last few years, subconsciously I have realised it is now safe to deal with all those old hurts.
Knowing this is only the first step though. Id love to tell you that once you work out why you compulsively eat, everything will magically be ok. But thats not how it works unfortunately.
After figuring out why you need to work out realistic strategies for dealing with the "why" instead of resorting to food.
Good luck to you

Edit- I forgot to say. I get what you mean about beating yourself up over slip ups. I dont know if you can see my sparkpage or food tracker, but if you can you will see there are 3 days this week that I did not track. I had a bad few days. Still kicking myself and terrified of even looking at the scales. But I am back on track now, I will keep on keeping on and hope you do too. emoticon

Edited by: ANYANP2 at: 10/25/2012 (19:29)
Its not what you do.... Its how you do it...

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LYNMEINDERS's Photo LYNMEINDERS SparkPoints: (557,798)
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10/9/12 2:51 A

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Hello Jen and welcome to spark....
it is not a nice place to be that you find yourself in but I know that there are others on spark in a simular place that would support you through this....have a look at the sparkteams....I am sure there are some there that will lead you to folks with the same struggle

Dunedin New Zealand......+19 hours

Giving up is NOT an option.


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10/8/12 9:22 P

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Hello, and welcome to a great site. It might be a good idea for you to seek out SFs in a similar situation to yours as they can be a massive support system. I also found some of the smaller challenges were very good to start out with, especially team ones as the desire not to let down team mates gives a lot of motivation! emoticon

Penny, Christchurch, New Zealand

Co-captain Panthers BLC24-28


Genealogists live in the past lane.
The past is our definition. We may strive, with good reason, to escape it, or to escape what is bad in it, but we will escape it only by adding something better.

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10/8/12 8:51 P

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emoticon and emoticon Jen.
Yes I would track your food. Be really honest with yourself and see what you are eating and how many calories it is.
And yes drink the water.
While you are coming off the craving to eat make sure you have healthy options, fruit, nuts dried fruit etc, not just for the kids but for you.

Every time you go to eat keep a journal and write down why you are going to eat it. Think about your emotions and what is making you want to do hits.
Write it down straight away, the distraction may even stop you doing it that time.

Once you see what the triggers are find different ways to help you get through the issues.

This is not going to stop over night so keep at it.
You may even need to seek some counseling.
Join us on the Kea Ora thread and let us encourage you as you encourage us.

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JANETTEB553's Photo JANETTEB553 Posts: 2,039
10/8/12 5:51 P

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Hi, yes it is a horrible place to be... my suggestion would be to just track your food using the tracker. If you track everything you eat for a couple of weeks then you should get an idea of what you need to not buy or cut down on. I try... to drink water every time I get the urge to eat... I find that if I drink a glass of water, or even 2 glasses if I can force myself, then I do not eat as much as I would have. Which when I am binge eating is a significant reduction..

Best Wishes

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10/8/12 4:31 P

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Hello and welcome to sparkpeople. You will find people with that same struggle and those who have overcome it here. This site has everything you need (and things you might not need with your knowledge) but most importantly this site has lots of people who've been there, done that, failed/succeeded. We're all here to support you on your journey.

10/8/12 4:19 P

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Hi I'm Jen, over the last 10 years I've gone from 69kg to 113kg. I struggle with depression and serious confidence issues and I can't stop eating compulsively. I haven't been able to manage a full day of sticking to an eating plan for years and as you can imagine, the failure is making everything so much worse. Everyone says not to beat yourself up over slip-ups but how can you not feel like s*** when you can't even go one day? I've tried everything bar surgery. It's not that I don't know how to eat well, I do, at one stage I was training to be a dietitian but I couldn't go through with it when I couldn't even control my own diet. I don't understand how food became such a crutch for me and why I can't stop. I'm desperate and I don't know what to do.

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