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SWDESERTLOVER's Photo SWDESERTLOVER Posts: 3,017
1/3/12 10:57 A

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Anastasia, I am so sorry to hear about your mother's diagnosis. My husband was diagnosed with stage IIB pancreatic cancer in 2009. He initially found it very difficult to talk about, but I believe it was because he was still in shock as Nancy has said. He has since opened up and talks more about his illness with family and friends. I completely agree with Nancy. Be there for her when she wants to talk and go to as many appointments with her as you can. I've found that Tommy really doesn't listen to his doctor and I later have to tell him what she said. It would also be great if she could find a support group, either locally or online, where she can talk with others in her same situation.

My prayers are with you and your mother.


Cindy
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UNICORN212's Photo UNICORN212 Posts: 13,489
1/2/12 10:07 P

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Anastasia - It could be that she is in shock, too, and wants more info before she tells anyone. My husband had Burkitt Lymphoma - it is pretty rare and we did not really have answers for a lot of the questions out family had. We found it early, treated it hard and fast, and he is now in remission. The best I can suggest is to be there for your Mom, listen when she wants to talk, and try to encourage her to get additional support from the others in the family. Go with her to the doctor when you can, and take a note pad so you can write things down. It is hard to remember the details later. You can also write down questions you have, so you do not forget them. Good luck!

~Nancy


"Faith is not about everything turning out OK; Faith is about being OK no matter how things turn out."

"I would rather live my life as if there is a God, and die to find out there isn't, than to live my life as if there isn't, and die to find out there is."


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1/2/12 4:09 P

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Hi Anastasia, I am sorry to hear about your mom. My husband was diagnosed with lung cancer 2.5 years ago. My husband is a very quiet man and he did not want to talk about it either. I am not good at keeping something so important to myself. So if he did not want to talk that was OK, I was nearby if he needed anything. I spoke with friends and family about the situation and they were very supportive.

He is in remission at the moment and hopefully will stay that way for a long time. Prayers are always helpful also. I had so many prayers being said that one wonders if dh had some help in putting the disease in remission.

I feel for you. You must handle the situation as best you can and get support where you can.

Take care of yourself

Dianne

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UCANTTAKETHESKY's Photo UCANTTAKETHESKY SparkPoints: (52,096)
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1/2/12 3:57 P

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Hi everyone. My name is Anastasia and I found out just yesterday that my mother has been diagnosed with breast cancer. It's also spread to her lymph nodes. She's having surgery later this month.

I've never had to deal with such a difficult disease with anyone close to me; our family has had remarkably good health in the past. It terrifies me, not the least because it now means that my risk increases as well.

She has her own way of dealing with it - namely, not telling anyone, including her own sister, and handling her recovery alone as much as possible. She'd asked me not to tell anyone, but going it alone is not my style of coping, and so here I am.

If anyone has any advice on the best way to go about dealing with this bombshell, I would very much appreciate it. It's all rather new to me and I'm not sure how to move forward from here.

~Anastasia, Delaware

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