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SWEETNSASSYSUZ Posts: 5
5/4/12 10:40 A

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Thanks Julie! Yes it sounds like your mom was quite a successful woman and great person too! That is the part that kills me...they do so much and our hands are so tied trying to help them. My mom is on Aricept as well but dad had to cut her back to a 1/2 dose since she was having a reaction to it. It was helping noticably at first but now doesnt seem quite as effective.

Keeping your mom and you in my thoughts and prayers too that you both can soon reach that inner peace!

best,
Susan

JRAUTIO's Photo JRAUTIO Posts: 1,704
5/4/12 9:21 A

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I know how hard it is, Susan! It sounds like we are in the same boat with things. My mom was very active, too -- a special ed teacher, got involved in community issues, in her later years was elected to the city council, etc. She was an advocate for so many people/things! I really feel so helpless that we can't be doing more for her. The first thing that the dementia attacked was her speech -- she kept forgetting words. And she was aware enough to take herself to the doctor about it. That's when they started her on Aricept and that kind of thing.

Thankfully the three of us "kids" have always been pretty much in agreement on things, so that helps a lot. I just wish the move to the care facility didn't push her over the edge. She got so combative that they put her in the psych hospital where they loaded her up on so many meds that she was non-functional, then she fell and got hurt and it's been kind of a downward spiral since then. We've now got her backed off a lot of meds. Our goal is to help her be somewhat at peace (without the constant pacing and attacking people) and keep her manageable to the staff. We are getting there, but it has been a slow process.

I know what you mean! I try to remember to look after myself, but sometimes there just isn't enough time in a day for that! Hang in there!

~~Julie~~


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SWEETNSASSYSUZ Posts: 5
5/2/12 11:33 A

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Thanks so much Julie! Mom has had dementia for a while so we have been dealing with incontinence as well as behavioral issues and she has trouble using the phone, and speaking in complete thoughts as well as doing normal taks. Its been a challenge but my mom is the best and deserves the best. Dad doesnt want her to go to a facility nor does she. I have two siblings, one who lives close and is useless and my sis lives far and tries to do what she can. Mom just deserves so much better than this. She did everything for everyone. Voluntarily ran my parents wetland organization for 25 years just to help dad and make the world a better place. She was president of the Rosary Sodality at church in the day and always baked and cooked for families who had lost a loved one, helped anyone she could if she knew they needed it, etx...now she needs help and it's hard trying to find that. Unfortunately I cant do everything being a couple hours away. Then when i get too wrapped up I dont take care of myself.
I am tracking food now...started yesterday. I dont particularly like tracking but am looking at it in a new light as I am determined to loose weight....trying to eat all of the right stuff and knowing what my numbers are helps along with my Jazzercise and dog walking.
I have found the site caring.com has a lot of good information on alzheimers/dementia.

Best,
Susan

JRAUTIO's Photo JRAUTIO Posts: 1,704
5/2/12 7:48 A

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Welcome, Susan. I think any of us on this team can attest to the fact that dealing with a loved one's dementia definitely adds a whole new level of stress. I'm not sure whether it would be better or worse to be a few hours away! (LOL!) My sister, brother and I have been main caregivers for my mom (Alzheimer's) until we moved her (against her will) to a care facilty last July. I can't believe it's been 10 months already and the speed of her decline. When we moved her, she was functioning on her own in her own condo with our just checking in on her 2 or 3 times a day and getting her meals. Since then she's been hospitalized 3 times, had terrible behavior issues, can no longer communicate, and has been reduced to adult diapers. It's been a horrible ordeal, with a good amount of the decline brought on by the stress of the move, I'm sure.

Of course, the weight takes a back seat to dealing with a parent, but that focus on health has helped give me something more positive to focus on. I've been a SP member since 2009 and have managed to keep most of the ~30 lbs off. I lost it just be logging and following Spark, drinking 8-10 glasses of water a day and basically following the Spark plan for exercising (strength training 3x/week and stationary bike almost daily for 20 minutes a day). Lately I've been loosely following the 17 Day Diet plan to deal with the few pounds that have been creeping back on.

Hang in there -- you can do this!

~~Julie~~


 current weight: 164.2 
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SWEETNSASSYSUZ Posts: 5
5/1/12 10:52 P

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It definitely is! Thanks!
S

DMILLER33's Photo DMILLER33 Posts: 8,624
5/1/12 6:06 P

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Welcome to the team! I can't imagine being that far away and trying to deal with. Yes it sounds like a lot of stress!

Doris
Northeast Ohio
Eastern Standard time
WRJ&G
Invincible Indigos


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SWEETNSASSYSUZ Posts: 5
5/1/12 5:58 P

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Thanks!

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5/1/12 4:17 P

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Welcome!

Kim

I have seen women looking at jewelry ads with a misty eye and one hand resting on the heart, and I only know what they're feeling because that's how I read the seed catalogs in January.

Barbara Kingsolver - Animal, Vegetable, Miracle


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SWEETNSASSYSUZ Posts: 5
5/1/12 2:45 P

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Hi to everyone! I am a new member to this team. My mom is 81 years old and has had dementia for the last several years and of course its gotten worse. I have been on spark people since 2009 and as my moms dementia has gotten worse my weight has also gotten worse. My mom and dad (he's 83) live at home. Mom used to do everything and taught dad learned helplessness. Now he needs to pick up the slack and frankly stinks at it! I live two hours away and cant be there all the time. Its hard. In the meantime my weight has gotten a little out of control as i also was involved in two car accidents in 208 and 2009 which messed up my back, ankles and knees and caused me to not be able for a period of time to excercise and therefore didnt help my weight issues. Ideally I think I need to loose 60-75lbs. The more I think about it the more it makes me frusterated. Today though is my first day of the new me...my short term goal to loose 20-25 lbs in the next 6-8weeks. I am actually tracking food via this site. I need something that works. I know I cant change the situation with my mom and that breaks my heart, but I can try to make my own life healthier.

Best to everyone-Susan

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