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OLDEROWL's Photo OLDEROWL Posts: 1,675
3/16/18 9:10 A

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I agree with Patti, LadyStarWind. Your only in a temporary setback, a normal situation for most who are on a diet. Stress can be managed in other ways than emotional eating but don't bash yourself for having not handled it well. Instead, use it as a moment of growth and know that (1) you will learn to hjavascript:void(0);andle stress better with the support of Sparkpeople members, (2) you can learn constructive ways to handle the situation, such as setting limits on how much financial aid you will give your son in the future, this is natural as you only can afford to give so much and excessive financial aid might not be constructive (3) you can have faith that the situation will work it self out as noted by Patti; (4) you can learn from others such as Patti who also have had the problem.

Edited by: OLDEROWL at: 3/17/2018 (07:33)
I'm Bob. I am retired and live in Virginia, USA (EDT) with my wife. I lead the "Feel Better Fast and Make It Last team.

Our goal is to help all members better use their mental powers to act positively and proactively to live a joyous productive life. The joy is in the shared journey of life whether it be ordinary or extraordinary, but mostly it will be exceptional with each other's support.

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-JAMES-'s Photo -JAMES- Posts: 12,725
3/5/18 9:46 A

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I don't eat because of stress. I eat just because I like the taste or texture... so this temptation never goes away.

When I get into a situation of stress and get upset, I usually take it out on housework. I do the dishes, I straighten out a basement storage area, I vacuum.

Alternately, you might want to go for a 15 minute walk. You might want to take a few of those in a day ... who knows. Something physical to do, that doesn't involve eating.

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Starting weight : 195.0 pounds (June 7, 2012)
Final weight : 168.2 pounds (July 23, 2013)

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CHERYLA2012's Photo CHERYLA2012 Posts: 4,099
3/4/18 10:22 A

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Kudos to you for identifying the fact that you get in your own way when you sabotage the effort you're making! That's a huge step right there.

I'm an emotional eater and that means sometimes I struggle. Not nearly as much as I did in the beginning but yes, I do have my moments. It took me a long time to see myself as an EE (emotional eater) and to make a pledge to myself to continually work to bring my heart and mind together in sync to combat the sometimes knee-jerk reaction that happens.

Questions I ask myself:
What did I do that was "so bad" that I feel the need to punish myself? Especially when almost 99.9% of the time it was someone else's behavior that was "bad."

Why would I want to "stuff my feelings down inside" with food?

Here's to you figuring out what works best for you and "getting out of your own way".

I wish you much success on your journey to becoming the healthiest you can be!


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Only I can change my life, no one can do it for me.

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SLIMMERKIWI's Photo SLIMMERKIWI SparkPoints: (283,666)
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3/3/18 10:24 P

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14lb weight loss since September? That is about what my weight loss was. It is something to be proud of, and remember, the slower losses are far more likely to stay off. I have been maintaining for a few years now, so can attest to that!!

I am fortunate in that I have never 'stress eaten'. My stress comes out in other ways and acted on in a healthy way appropriate for whatever is causing the stress. Sometimes good deep breathing exercises, focusing on your breath is a good way to help reduce that stress.

My Psychologist gave me a CD with the breathing exercises. One track was a man's gentle voice and the other was the same breathing exercises, but a woman's voice. This is because some find it more relaxing one side than the other.

Many years ago a man I worked with gave me a tape to listen to for relaxation. I didn't suffer stress/anxiety/depression at that time of my life; it was purely re curiosity. That one was listening to waves of the ocean, tree leaves rustling with wind blowing through them, running water from a brook, and birdsong etc. Only problem is, I never EVER got to hear the end. I listened to it laying down on my bed, and it was soooo gentle and relaxing it lulled me to sleep LOL!

Obviously we aren't privy to the ins/outs re your son and his/your finances, but if you are able, only help financially if there is an absolute need. You need to have a talk with him and if need be encourage him to put pen to paper re all of his expenses (cups of coffee, cigarettes, alcohol, entertainment, clothing, etc., then cut out what isn't essential, and work on that. A lot of people are poor because they can't figure the difference between need and want. I mostly only spend on *need* and that is because I am very financially strapped, having lived on a benefit relating to health for a lot of years, and prior to that very low paying jobs.

Good luck,

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I am not a Dr - please check with your qualified Health Professional for a diagnosis and treatment plan

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ARCHIMEDESII's Photo ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (211,021)
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3/3/18 3:17 P

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We've all been in your shoes. What you need to do is find ways to vent your stress that don't involve food. If you feel like walking to the kitchen, put on your coat and take a walk outside. Walking is not only great cardiovascular exercise, it's a great way to reduce stress. if you don't wan to take a walk, sit and sip a cup of tea. listen to your favorite music. take a long hot steamy shower. hit the gym for a group exercise class. These are things you can do that will help you reduce your stress.

As far as losing that 14 pounds, you should be giving yourself more credit. Do you have a 5 or 10 pound hand weight in the house ? Okay, what I want you to do is pick those up and walk around with them. At one time, you carried 15 extra pounds on your body. Put the weights down. look at them. that's how much 15 pounds looks like !

What I suggest doing is giving yourself a small reward for hitting your first 15 pounds. it doesn't have to be anything fancy. how about a manicure ? how about buying yourself a new shirt ? You treat yourself as a reward for working hard. When you hit 50 pounds, then you reward yourself with something a little more extravagant.

Each time you hit a weight loss goal, you give yourself a reward. it doesn't have to be food (in fact, let's avoid food rewards). let's think new clothes, manicure, hairstyle, massage, weekend trip, etc...

Why not try that ? How about a small reward for going a good job losing 14 pounds ? We mark milestones in our lives, why not mark the milestones of your weight loss journey ?

Edited by: ARCHIMEDESII at: 3/3/2018 (15:23)
3/3/18 2:19 P

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Been there, done that! My best advice: take a deep breath, remember you are on a healthy path, and that this too shall pass. I always have envied those whose children grow up independent and financially stable; not so for my son, but even he is becoming more mature and doing his best to make it on his own. But we have many other blessings, so I try to focus on those.

When I'm really stressed out it helps me to go for a long walk...(even done it at 3am-LOL). Make sure you eat those 3 healthy meals a day...and then the stress-eating isn't as much a factor. eat more...but at least you got all your nutrients in. It also helps to remember that Weight Loss is NOT Linear!! Have patience, and persevere. Will be thinking of you,

"The only thing we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us."
Gandalf: Lord of the Rings

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STORMYG56's Photo STORMYG56 SparkPoints: (4,095)
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3/3/18 7:42 A

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I have worked so hard to lose 14 lbs. since Sept.My dietician says I am doing great, but for the past few days, I have been very irritable about my son (who lives out of state...)long story...but he is stressing me financially. My blood pressure goes up and down. I have been to the doctor, etc and am monitoring my blood pressue....but I am not wanting to give myself credit for what I have accomplished & the last 3 days, I have sabatoge my weight loss by eating more!!!

"I deserve to be good to myself ...rather than "weight" for others to do it for me."

--Quote by StormyG56

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