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NIRERIN Posts: 14,531
5/26/18 7:13 P

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Rome was not built in a day and you are not going to change a lifetime of eating habits in a day, a week, a month or even a year. If you expect to suddenly start being a different person who can do all of these new things perfectly starting now, then you are setting yourself up to fail. There are very few people that can turn on a dime like that and it's not a reasonable expectation to hold yourself to. It is no different than expecting to play at Julliard level the first time you ever sit down at a piano. There are a lot of hours and a lot of learning that come between starting to something and achieving proficiency.

Everything that you do now you are doing because at some point you decided that that option was the best use of your resources. Over the years you have built up habits that support those options, which makes repeating those same things options that require little to no thought or effort on your part. When you want to change one little thing, you have to change dozens of the supports that you no longer think about doing. Want to swap your breakfast cereal for eggs with vegetables? Sounds simple, right? Well, you are used to buying cereal and keeping tabs on the milk at your house. Eggs, well, you don't know how many of those you'd eat for breakfast, how many you can buy and use up before they spoil, you're not keeping tabs on those at that use rate and what kitchen utensils do you need to have and have available to cook the eggs. Which brings us to recipes, do you have a recipe that you like that you can cook in the time you already have allotted for breakfast? If you need to make more time to cook eggs what activity is that extra time going to come from? You also will probably need to plan more time to clean up from breakfast and that's got to come from another activity as well. This is all assuming that there is a recipe that you like that fits your time needs, calorie range and your cooking skills. Because higher levels of cooking skills require a lot of extra effort and some chunks of time not in the minute that you need them. And we still have not gotten to the vegetables in this equation or what your plans are for the milk you're likely going to be overstocked on until you get used to having eggs instead of cereal. That's one little breakfast swap. For most people that's enough change all at once, so deciding to work out and eat all new foods is just so overwhelming that you give up quickly.

Pick one small change to make to make your choices better than they were before (yesterday, last week, last month last year) and start to build off of that, one small habit at a time. Suddenly eating steamed tofu and sprouts is not going to fly if you are a meat and potatoes person, but you could probably manage to add a little bit of broccoli or mushrooms or cauliflower or asparagus to your plate. Once you are used to that, cut back on the potatoes a little. Then work on increasing your vegetables again. Then cut back on the potatoes a little. Keep making little steps that will eventually get you where you need to be. You might try topping your baked potato with salsa instead of loading it with cheese and sour cream and bacon. You could also try topping a baked potato with steamed broccoli and cheese. Keep the things that you really love the most and tweak the other items to balance out nutritionally. Do this in multiple baby steps that allow you to find out what works for you and what doesn't. Sometimes learning what not to do is just as valuable as learning what works on the first try.

And as you are working on these little steps I will share one of my favorite things from these boards. If you get a flat tire, you do not go out and slash the three good tires to match, right? Making small bits of progress is occasionally going to be slowed by slip ups or bad days or life. This doesn't mean that you go out and actively work against what is still functional. Because you will have days where you have an extra 1000+ calories than you planned on. If you choose to throw in the towel and have another 1000 because you weren't perfect then you will always have problems. If you remember that your weight is the average of calories in and calories out over the past months and years and 1000 is a small blip in the grand scheme of things and continue on then those blips will average out so long as they are the exceptions and not the rule.

-google first. ask questions later.

LUANN_IN_PA Posts: 29,154
5/24/18 10:06 P

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You have an entire website right here!

"We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand."
~ Randy Pausch

"There's a difference between interest and commitment. When you're interested in doing something, you do it only when circumstance permit. When you're committed to something, you accept no excuses, only results."
~ Art Turock

"We have a saying in Tibet: If a problem can be solved, there is no use worrying about it. If it can't be solved, worrying will do no good."
~ 7 Years in T
JENYJO2001's Photo JENYJO2001 Posts: 55
5/24/18 8:02 P

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I am bad at keeping motivated. I am at the heaviest I have ever been. would love to have people help keep me going. I have very little to no support at home. I am desperate I can't keep doing the same things. thanks for listening.

 current weight: 238.0 
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