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ROBBIEY SparkPoints: (478,676)
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2/17/18 11:10 P

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I just focus on my goals and keep on moving

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SLIMMERKIWI's Photo SLIMMERKIWI SparkPoints: (272,847)
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2/17/18 8:53 P

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I have some thoughts to ponder on:

* ARE your family actually unhealthy ... as in have been told so by their Doctors?

* IS there actually a genuine weight issue, as in medically a weight issue? I note on your SparkPage photo you don't look to be overweight.

* Do you come across as 'lecturing'? You could always ask the family member you are closest to if you do.

The only person that you can take control of is yourself. You can't control what others eat/drink/do. Perhaps you would be better off to volunteer to cook a meal once a week and make that meal a favourite ... i.e. a healthy 'make-over' pizza, Try oven-baked chips with a spray of oil over them. Allow them enough time in the oven so that they cook properly and crisp up. If you put a sprinkle of garlic salt or spicy salt over them, they may not notice much of a difference, and yes, potato can be quite healthy. If they don't like salads, try serving the chips with lean meat and cooked peas or broccoli, and carrots etc. and perhaps add a (little bit of a tasty) cheese sauce for them to have with it, or even tomato sauce, but if possible choose a reduced salt one.

If you don't tell them it is healthy, they will be more likely to eat it.

Take care,

Co-Moderator Dealing with Depression

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I am not a Dr - please check with your qualified Health Professional for a diagnosis and treatment plan

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NIRERIN Posts: 14,434
2/3/18 8:27 A

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The thing is that you and your family aren't on the same page. You continually pointing out how poor their choices are isn't going to help anything, especially if they think they are making a better choice so you can share too and you are shooting it down. As others have noted, you're likely coming across as lecturing to people who aren't in a place to hear what you are saying. So what that means is that you leave your family in peace and reach out on a place like Spark to discuss how you are feeling and where you are. Perhaps you make the slow cooker salsa chicken one day and let any family member who thinks it smells good have a taste. If they like it, offer to make it one day for everyone, yes with fried potatoes or cheese curds or as tacos, whatever everyone else likes. Keep in mind that this is not the place you want to be starting with steamed tofu and sprouts with a vinegar based dressing. Try making things that, while not as "healthy" as you would like them to be, would be something that your family might actually like the taste of that would be a small step in the right direction. Make enough for you and some tastes and offer to make more if the taste responses are positive. Salads might be too far for people used to fried everything, but vegetables roasted in olive oil with herbs or spices might work, as might thinly slicing root vegetables and making chips out of them. You might get traction with tempura or beer battered, and you might even get them to try baked and not fried once or twice. You have to walk a fine line between something being too close to a favorite recipe (and therefore not nearly as good in comparison) and being too out there to try. It's possible, but it takes some maneuvering.

-google first. ask questions later.

MLAN613 Posts: 20,296
2/3/18 7:14 A

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As you continue to make healthy choices, maybe they will see that you are serious about it now. And honestly, those small talks may come across as a huge lecture, even if it's done in love.

So, I encourage you to lead by example. Maybe they'll join you, maybe not. MissRuth is right: SparkPeople is a rather supportive place with lots of great information and good people.

Edited by: MLAN613 at: 2/3/2018 (14:11)
Meghan in Minneapolis, Minnesota, USA

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MISSRUTH's Photo MISSRUTH Posts: 4,472
2/3/18 7:03 A

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I think there's a lot of us who don't have the support of our family in "real life". That's one of the things that makes Spark so great-- it's not only a wonderful source of information and tools for a healthy lifestyle, but also a very supportive community.

Very early on in my own journey, it became apparent to me that no one (in my "real life") was interested. That's fine. I've got Spark.

Ruth in Cookeville, TN Central Time Zone

Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think - Christopher Robin to Pooh

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2/2/18 6:56 P

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My family is very unhealthy and despite all the talks I've had with them about making small changes, eating healthier, and losing some weight, no one is on board with me. Some of my family members mock me if I choose a salad over fried food. Most don't say anything but they'll buy cakes, cookies, and fast food and offer me some even though they know I'm trying to cut back. I can handle saying no. It's just that sometimes you need someone to talk to about your efforts but I just don't have that with my family. They don't really care that I want to live healthier and I can't move out at the moment. Does anyone have a similar situation? If so, how do you stay motivated? Where do you find support?

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