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MANDIETERRIER1's Photo MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,638
6/7/18 2:51 P

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I had to unfriend and block someone.

I don't care where someone leans politically. This person became really abusive to anyone who disagreed with her.



~Just my .02 cents. Not sure that it is worth that much~

erinwroteablogyall.blogspot.
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MANDIETERRIER1's Photo MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,638
6/6/18 11:45 P

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Just let the unfriending roll off your back. You lost nothing when you lost them as a friend.

Look in the mirror and say, Hey you! Yeah you! You are the only one I am in competition with.

There's another accessory company called Paparazzi they sell jewelry for $5 a piece.

~Just my .02 cents. Not sure that it is worth that much~

erinwroteablogyall.blogspot.
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ARCHIMEDESII's Photo ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (202,363)
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6/6/18 12:44 P



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Great news that you've lost another pound.

"I am going to put more focus into me so I can achieve it."

Here's something you can do that will help you focus on your needs while you work towards achieving your goals, ditch social media. Set a goal to stay away from FB or instagram or twitter for one week. If you can make it through one week, set a new goal for two weeks.

Getting off social media will make you more successful.


LACOYTA Posts: 621
6/6/18 10:00 A

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She's offended me by doing things online that will not mention here. They had nothing to do with weight.
Anyway I lost a pound. Nine more to go to meet my summer goal. I am going to put more focus into me so I can achieve it.

ARCHIMEDESII's Photo ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (202,363)
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6/6/18 6:05 A



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Maybe she unfriended you because you unfriended her.

Let's get back to finding ways to make yourself a more successful person.

Go back to that person's FB page. If she's kept the weight off, give her a compliment about having lost the weight and kept it off. Say something like, I know we haven't chatted in a while, but I think you've done a great job losing the weight.

Successful people give compliments.

LACOYTA Posts: 621
6/6/18 12:30 A

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I unfollowed that person. She eventually unfriended me. No clue why. I never even say anything on facebook.
"Let Go doesn't strike me as people interested in antique and interesting."
I might try craigslist. They have an antique section.

"Does anyone else feel stuck at a certain weight? I don't see the scale moving downward and I am eating right and putting the work in!"
I do.



ARCHIMEDESII's Photo ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (202,363)
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6/5/18 2:41 P



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"Someone I know lost a bunch of weight. They're no thinner than me but act as though they are some holier than thou fitness icon (I'm we've all known someone like this lol). She posts annoying things on Facebook just so people will say how great she looks. Frankly if she gained the weight back, I would think it served her right. "

Traits of an unsuccessful person,"they secretly hope others fail."

How much weight did your friend lose ? Why can't you congratulate her for working hard to lose the weight ? It's because you're jealous of her success, that's why. She lost weight and you haven't. Now all you want her to do is fail so that she can be just as miserable as you.

Now, let's put a different spin on this situation.

You want to be successful, right ? Okay, what's something a successful person would do in the same situation ? How about giving that person a compliment. If you lost the weight, wouldn't you want compliments ? Since you seem to enjoy visiting this person's FB page, why not leave her a compliment ? Think of it as a step towards becoming a more successful person.

And if you ate BBQ chips once this month, that's a big improvement when you consider you would eat them all the time while watching TV.


Edited by: ARCHIMEDESII at: 6/5/2018 (14:41)
CLMART3's Photo CLMART3 SparkPoints: (19,150)
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6/5/18 2:28 P

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Does anyone else feel stuck at a certain weight? I don't see the scale moving downward and I am eating right and putting the work in!



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MANDIETERRIER1's Photo MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,638
6/5/18 2:22 P

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Since the items are antique and interesting. You should probably do an estate sale. Which costs time and money. You have to hire someone who specializes in estate sales. Usually they take a percentage of the sales.

Let Go doesn't strike me as people interested in antique and interesting.

~Just my .02 cents. Not sure that it is worth that much~

erinwroteablogyall.blogspot.
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MANDIETERRIER1's Photo MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,638
6/5/18 2:19 P

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You worry to much about other people and their actions.
Who cares if that other person lost more weight and how they're acting. Next time they start acting like that. Ignore them.

Next time you look in the mirror. Say to yourself. Now there! In that mirror. That's the only one that matters. Where my weight is concerned.

You can mute and unfollow people on Facebook. Where they'll still be in your friends list, but they won't show up in your newsfeed. Before that instead of being jealous. That shade of green looks good on no one. Pay her a genuine compliment.

Edited by: MANDIETERRIER1 at: 6/5/2018 (14:27)
~Just my .02 cents. Not sure that it is worth that much~

erinwroteablogyall.blogspot.
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LACOYTA Posts: 621
6/5/18 2:03 P

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I listed some items on Letgo, no takers though.
"I can make an argument that this chart bears reposting and rereading by the OP. "
I printed it out and hung it up.

"ou mentioned once before that you CAN fit into size 6-8 pants."
I have two pairs of size 6 pants I can fit into because of their wide leg cut. normally I have to wear 8s or sometimes 10s

"Have you read that list I posted about successful people versus unsuccessful people ? You criticize. You hold a grudge. You hope other people fail. You fear change. You blame others for your own faults. You don't set goals."
I set a goal to lose ten more lbs by Sept 1, 2018 and another 10 by the end of the year I don't see it happening.
Someone I know lost a bunch of weight. They're no thinner than me but act as though they are some holier than thou fitness icon (I'm we've all known someone like this lol). She posts annoying things on Facebook just so people will say how great she looks. Frankly if she gained the weight back, I would think it served her right.

"The most truthful thing you have ever said was that you hate exercise. that was a genuinely honest statement. Everything else has been nothing but excuses. "
I'd like exercise more if I had endurance but even when I had a 27 inch waist I didn't have endurance.

"My question ? How long have you gone without eating the BBQ chips ?"
About a month. But on Saturday we went out of town and I was able to get a small bag of my absolute favorite BBQ chips (They aren't available where I live anymore). That's not a regular thing I have a chance to buy though.

"there is a job search engine called INDEED. I've been laid off twice. Twice I have used them to find a new job. "
Looked up my area nothing good.

"a person can start as a cleaner, move up through the ranks to become a facilities manager"
I could do that.



MANDIETERRIER1's Photo MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,638
6/4/18 11:05 P

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Sent a sparkmail. @ARCHIMEDESII I hadn't even realized that I turned off my spark mail

~Just my .02 cents. Not sure that it is worth that much~

erinwroteablogyall.blogspot.
com/2018/04/what-happened.html


ARCHIMEDESII's Photo ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (202,363)
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6/4/18 6:52 P



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MANDIE,

When a cousin mine went to Italy for the first time, I told her to bring along some scarves and a couple of brooches/pins. She asked me why ? I said, if you dress like a tourist, you will be treated like a tourist. Dress a little better and you will be treated a bit better. When she came back from her trip, she agreed with me. accessorizing a bit got her better service.

Tossing a brightly colored scarf around your shoulders dresses up a boring T shirt or short sleeve shirt.It adds a simple touch of flare. A brooch/pin becomes a topic of conversation. Oh what a lovely pin, where did you get it ? That pin can be a $1 piece of costume jewelry you found at a yard sale.

I like wearing chunky bracelets. plastic, sterling silver,stone... it has to be big and make a statement. Do I wear them all the time ? Nope. just when I want to be a little more stylish. And believe me, I'd prefer to run around in gym clothing. But some days I do have to look somewhat "put together".

A long time ago, I suggested that you check through GROUPON to find local deals at spas. And if you're in the middle of no where (which you have said many times), see what deals are available locally. There is almost always some beauty salon looking to attract new clients by having a GROUPON sale.

Why not have a facial ? Why not get your make up done by a professional cosmetician ? Oh wait, that's too expensive. umm... not if you have a GROUPON deal. And let's say you can't find a local groupon, then you SAVE your money.

The money you save by avoiding overpriced snacks at the vending machine would be a good start. If you've been paying $1-$2 per snack, that means you can save $5-$10 per week or $25 to $50 for the month.

If you say cleaners don't make much money, then you need to change companies. You can be a cleaner for a Motel 6 and make minimum wage of $7.75 an hour OR you can work for a big company doing the exact same thing for $12 an hour.

there is a job search engine called INDEED. I've been laid off twice. Twice I have used them to find a new job.

www.indeed.com

Out of curiosity, I searched on cleaning jobs in the Boston area. What did I find ?
Most were offering around $14 an hour. But hey, if you worked as a "custodian" at Harvard University, you could make $21.99 an hour plus benefits. Any universities or colleges in your area ? A university will pay a decent wage.

What else can you do ? You could take on more responsibility. You said you're just a cleaner. Well, you have a boss, don't you ? Okay, if you were to work hard, show that you were willing to take on extra work and be responsible, you could be a cleaning manager too.

a person can start as a cleaner, move up through the ranks to become a facilities manager. I interviewed as a facilities coordinator. What does a facilities coordinator do ? Makes sure all the toilets have toilet paper. Makes sure the WIFI is working. Makes sure the carpets aren't puckering and cause a person to trip. A facilities coordinator makes sure the floors are mopped. A facilities coordinator makes sure an outside contractor is let into the building and watched to make sure they don't wander around places they aren't supposed to be.

How to become a facilities coordinator ? By learning about what is needed in your building. Does a carpet need vacuuming ? Don't wait for your manager to tell you to do it, you just do it because you see that it needs vacuuming. Does a door need to be repaired ? Submit a ticket to have someone come out to repair the door.

The point is that you do things without asking because they need to be done. What happens when you do this ? You get more responsibilities and maybe more money. You become a cleaning supervisor instead of a cleaner. after cleaner supervisor, you become a cleaning manager. after manager, facilities coordinator or facilities manager.

Look up salaries for a facilities manager, you can make very good money if you have the skills. How do you acquire skills ? By working hard doing stuff no one tells you to do. You do it because it needs to get done.

ARCHIMEDESII's Photo ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (202,363)
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6/4/18 6:16 P



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MANDIE,

Saw your message. PM me or read your Spark page.

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MANDIETERRIER1's Photo MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,638
6/4/18 1:30 P

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You don't like how you look in clothes. I remember you said that you were really good at accesorizing. So buy plain basic pants and tops. Buy amazing wow pieces for your accessories.

But I can't afford accessories. The thrift store is an amazing place for unique accessories. Etsy sells handmade as well as vintage. Ebay has items in all price points. Even those stores you say you can't afford have clearance sales. Which are hit or miss, but you get the idea.

You know what really makes my outfits look special? A broach. You know you can buy ten of them from Amazon for like $11 and up, but not more than $19. They look really good, too. No one would guess that your broach cost $2.

A string of pearls also makes an outfit look special. You can buy a nice set of faux pearls from Walmart for like $5. Walmart is also a place for neat accessories. If you wanted to spend a little more on your faux pearls. Napier and 1928 are great jewelry brands. You may be able to find a real string of pearls at a thrift store.

(I personally think trendy fashions are redonculous. Except for cropped pants. I don't know how I look in ripped jeans and cold shoulder tops. Since Hell will freeze over before anything like that is ever on my body)

Edited by: MANDIETERRIER1 at: 6/4/2018 (14:51)
~Just my .02 cents. Not sure that it is worth that much~

erinwroteablogyall.blogspot.
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ARCHIMEDESII's Photo ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (202,363)
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6/4/18 1:07 P



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"Update:plateaued after losing 6 lbs. Upset because I still have 20 lbs to go."

How would you feel if you have 200+ pounds to go ?

You're pretty close to a healthy weight for your height. And yet, you talk as if you were someone with 200 pounds to lose instead of 20. When you describe your body, your legs are the size of tree trunks. You mentioned once before that you CAN fit into size 6-8 pants. Do you know how many women who do need to lose 100-200+ pounds would be thrilled to wear a size 12 and you're complaining because you can't fit a size 2 - 4 ?

You have a very distorted image of yourself. Even when I was morbidly obese, I never called myself some of the things you've called yourself.

Have you read that list I posted about successful people versus unsuccessful people ? You criticize. You hold a grudge. You hope other people fail. You fear change. You blame others for your own faults. You don't set goals.

The most truthful thing you have ever said was that you hate exercise. that was a genuinely honest statement. Everything else has been nothing but excuses.

My question ? How long have you gone without eating the BBQ chips ?



ARCHIMEDESII's Photo ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (202,363)
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6/4/18 12:48 P



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I can make an argument that this chart bears reposting and rereading by the OP.



Things successful people do

compliment
forgive others
accept responsibility for their actions
keep a journal
continuously learn
embrace change
Have a sense of gratitude

Things unsuccessful people do

criticize
blame others for their failures
hold a grudge
secretly hope others fail
never set goals
talk about people
fear change

MANDIETERRIER1's Photo MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,638
6/4/18 12:47 P

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If it's interesting stuff call those guys from the History Channel. I know their business is called Antiques Archeology.

Their show is called American Pickers. If you have things they're interested in. They pay cash. They have had some pretty unique people on their show. They don't exploit people for drama or ratings.

~Just my .02 cents. Not sure that it is worth that much~

erinwroteablogyall.blogspot.
com/2018/04/what-happened.html


MANDIETERRIER1's Photo MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,638
6/4/18 12:42 P

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That is true it's not fair to brand "everyone" on you tube and Instagram as fake. There are a couple good and decent people in those medias.

You have to admit though that among the real and decent people. Like Fatgirlfedup, JordanandMattFitFromFat and Aliceblows. There is a fair amount of the ridiculous. The people selling detoxes and booty pills and creams.

The most ridiculous Instagram post I have seen recently...
This woman is laying on the floor in front of a large meat lovers pizza. All she is wearing is a thong and a creatively placed pillow, to cover her top bits.
Her spiel is, I love Brand X Carb Blockers. So that I can eat this meat lovers pizza. Without guilt. Okay, so let's live in fantasy land for a minute and pretend that bottle of pills she is advertising. Really does block carbs. What about the 28 grams of fat and 10 grams of saturated fat per slice?

I do eat meat lovers pizza from time to time. I admit it. It's delicious. I also know that there will be a price to pay. Fortunately I am also wise enough to know that a bottle of Brand X Carb Blockers. Isn't going to mitigate the price I have to pay for indulging in a slice or two of meat lovers pizza.


Edited by: MANDIETERRIER1 at: 6/4/2018 (14:42)
~Just my .02 cents. Not sure that it is worth that much~

erinwroteablogyall.blogspot.
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--MEOW--'s Photo --MEOW-- Posts: 4,747
6/4/18 11:29 A

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And for you, Lacoyta. Since you always say no one wants advice from a cleaner and you use that as an excuse for everything...
About 2 years ago I found this vlogger. I don't follow her because I don't really like watching vlogs. But I clicked on one of her videos because the title caught my attention. Anyway, she's this lady who lives in Dallas and she cleans houses. And her videos are literally just vlogs about her not-so-interesting life. She's mexican so the channel is in Spanish but still, I want you to have a look at it
www.youtube.com/channel/UC9a3udCBFwDfL3YVy
uPP3Rw

As you can see, she doesn't look like a model at all. She doesn't have the perfect body, the perfect house, nothing, just a normal person. And still, in only 2 years she got over half a million subscribers!! If she spoke English, I'm sure she would have even more. She's making money from her vids and she's already getting free stuff from some brands because her channel is growing so fast. So... there you go.

If you really wanted to be a vlogger/blogger, influencer or whatever, I'm sure you could. But of course you would need to put some effort into it...

- Danny :)
(CST)


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--MEOW--'s Photo --MEOW-- Posts: 4,747
6/4/18 11:09 A

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lol guys, I don't think that's completely fair. Most youtubers, instagram influencers, etc. are just regular people who worked their way from bottom to top.

"Fake" people usually don't get many followers... just look at the most-subscribed channels on youtube (I mean, regular youtubers, not celebrities). They're just regular people doing what they like and making millions out of it. That's pretty admirable IMO. And they work really hard to keep their followers...

These days anyone can be an influencer... you don't need to be a model. You just need to be authentic and interesting...

- Danny :)
(CST)


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LACOYTA Posts: 621
6/4/18 10:58 A

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"I don't really like social media influncers either. Their whole stick is to get people to buy stuff they don't really need. When they got it free.

If you had all that stuff? Would you use it? Would you really use it? Come on be honest."

I don't look good in the clothes bloggers do. I know some bloggers get free beauty services. If I had the chance I'd look into laser hair removal. TMI, perhaps.

"Those women on Instagram with the big butts who sell booty cream. ::whispers:: they have butt cheek implants"

Or they have had illegal butt injections. Where who knows what has been injected into the backside-EW!

"Save and pool your money. Call 1-800-Got-Junk they work until midnight. When they arrive. Start pointing"

I wish we could but we have the kind of stuff you have to sell(antiques, large record collection)

MANDIETERRIER1's Photo MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,638
6/3/18 11:48 P

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If your parents have no sentimental value attached to the items. Save and pool your money. Call 1-800-Got-Junk they work until midnight. When they arrive. Start pointing

~Just my .02 cents. Not sure that it is worth that much~

erinwroteablogyall.blogspot.
com/2018/04/what-happened.html


MANDIETERRIER1's Photo MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,638
6/3/18 11:36 P

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I don't really like social media influncers either. Their whole stick is to get people to buy stuff they don't really need. When they got it free.

If you had all that stuff? Would you use it? Would you really use it? Come on be honest.

So I'm not being mean. Please read the previous posts from the personal trainer. :)

Those women on Instagram with the big butts who sell booty cream. ::whispers:: they have butt cheek implants

Edited by: MANDIETERRIER1 at: 6/3/2018 (23:45)
~Just my .02 cents. Not sure that it is worth that much~

erinwroteablogyall.blogspot.
com/2018/04/what-happened.html


LACOYTA Posts: 621
6/3/18 12:48 P

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"To Whom much is given. Much is expected. If you had all those things you dream of, would you actually use them? "

Yes. I would.

"Have you ever spoken to your doctor about feeling so blah? About your idolizing social media influencers? Since you think they have the perfect life? "
No. That's embarrassing. I'm starting to think they have no conscience. They post content that makes people feel bad about themselves.

"How about your parents? Have they ever spoken to their doctor? About the need to hang onto your your brothers and uncles belongings? "

No there's no "need" to It's just hard to get everything done AND declutter.

Update:plateaued after losing 6 lbs. Upset because I still have 20 lbs to go.




MANDIETERRIER1's Photo MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,638
6/2/18 1:51 P

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This bears repeating;

I remember reading a blog by this one Instagram/ You Tube star. She said that her real life was very lonely. That she doesn't know who her real friends were. Most people that want to be her friend. Just want to latch onto her star status.

I don't know about you. That makes me sad. No amount of money or status. Is worth giving up real friends for sycophants. Who will drop you like a hot potato when the next "It Girl" comes along.

See the Social Media Influencer life is far from perfect. All the free stuff in the world can't replace real friends and real social interactions.

(This is coming from a person with crippling social anxiety. So if I make it to the point where I want to be your friend. I don't want a shallow friendship. I want my friendships to be, Ride or Die)

~Just my .02 cents. Not sure that it is worth that much~

erinwroteablogyall.blogspot.
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NIRERIN Posts: 14,346
6/1/18 8:42 P

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Your expectations are a big part of your problem. If your goals are so lofty that you can't reach them, scale back your goals until they fit what you have to give. Seven hours of workouts a week, especially when you figure in showering and commuting, is a part time job.You might be able to work up there eventually, but you might find 30 minutes two or three times a week is a better starting point for you. When you are trying to cram in more than you have the time or energy for, it can take a toll on you, especially if you are already trending a little more in the neighborhood of the blues or depression.

As others have said, planning can be key. If you don't have a lot of extra time and energy, you don't plan to do twenty things that day. You pick a few things to prioritize and you get to other things after if you can. Talking yourself into five or ten minutes of something can make an impact over time and most people can find an extra ten minutes or so. Over a year ten minutes a day can make a huge difference, kind of like seeing a child every year on their birthday. But the day to day of smaller chunks is like seeing someone in their thirties that you see every day that has not changed their hairstyle in five years.

-google first. ask questions later.

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6/1/18 1:57 P

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I'm really not trying to be mean, but it seems like you are fishing for sympathy from people who will give you the "magic pill" to transform your life overnight. Not gonna happen. Your will to improve your life has to be stronger than your excuses.

Nobody has a "perfect" diet. I watch my portions, eat mostly home cooked meals (nothing fancy or expensive...I'm on a budget, too), and try to limit "treats" to once a week or so. That's it. I lost the first 35 pounds without tracking calories or ever setting foot inside a gym, and have lost 3 pounds since I started working out 2 weeks ago. The exercise isn't making the huge difference, the diet is, so if you really are "too tired" to workout, then you don't have to. I mostly am doing it for health reasons, not weight loss, anyway.

Stop thinking that everyone else has this fairy tale life and that you are the only one with problems. Don't measure yourself against other people, measure yourself against who you were yesterday, and each day just try to do better.



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MANDIETERRIER1's Photo MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,638
5/31/18 11:21 P

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Have you ever spoken to your doctor about feeling so blah? About your idolizing social media influencers? Since you think they have the perfect life?

I remember reading a blog by this one Instagram/ You Tube star. She said that her life was very lonely. That she doesn't know who her real friends are. Most people that want to be her friend. Just want to latch onto her star status.

I don't know about you. That makes me sad. No amount of money or status. Is worth giving up real friends for sycophants. Who will drop you like a hot potato when the next "It Girl" comes along. See the Social Media Influencer life is far from perfect. All the free stuff in the world can't replace real social interactions.

How about your parents? Have they ever spoken to their doctor? About the need to hang onto your your brothers and uncles belongings?

Maybe some group family counseling? Maybe that would be a good idea?

After my aunt died. I didn't delete her emails or email address for years. It felt like a betrayal.

Edited by: MANDIETERRIER1 at: 6/2/2018 (13:47)
~Just my .02 cents. Not sure that it is worth that much~

erinwroteablogyall.blogspot.
com/2018/04/what-happened.html


SPUNOUTMOM Posts: 959
5/31/18 3:51 P

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Yes! It's like I have to choose between working out and having a clean house. I am so relieved to see that others struggle with this issue. I have asked a personal trainer how she was able to fit it all in. She was less than helpful. Sometimes just not enough hours in a day. I have learned that I can have a tidy home, it just takes me a bit of planning and organizing. I am so glad you made this post.



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MANDIETERRIER1's Photo MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,638
5/31/18 3:10 P

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There will always be people blessed with looks and fortune. People who look amazing in no matter what they're wearing. Whether it's sweat pants or a ball gown. I have cousins and an aunts like this. They're always beautiful and perfect.

To Whom much is given. Much is expected. If you had all those things you dream of, would you actually use them?

If you can be faithful with a little. Then you might be given more.

Some people aren't, born with looks and fortune. There is no fairy godmother to turn either of us from a pumpkin into something magical. I have come to terms with this. So I'm going to be the best darn pumpkin I can be.

Edited by: MANDIETERRIER1 at: 6/2/2018 (13:40)
~Just my .02 cents. Not sure that it is worth that much~

erinwroteablogyall.blogspot.
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MANDIETERRIER1's Photo MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,638
5/31/18 3:01 P

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@ARCHIMEDESII could that personal trainer send that workout to me? I am committed to exercising 30-60 minutes a day. I do exercise that much. I just feel like I'm floundering.

~Just my .02 cents. Not sure that it is worth that much~

erinwroteablogyall.blogspot.
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MANDIETERRIER1's Photo MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,638
5/31/18 2:56 P

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Is it natural to imagine having all those things you listed? Yes
Is it realistic to put everything on hold. Waiting to get them? Nope

Heck I want to time transport Anna Bates to 2018. So I can have a ladies maid. I can't because she is a fictional character. Then there's no such thing as time travel.

You find time for what you want to find time for.

And if I told you once. I told you a thousand times

INSTAGRAM IS FAKE! AS FAKE AS FAKE CAN GET!

They are social media ininfluencers. They get everything free. Have photographers, hair, makeup, lighting, canon cameras and photoshop at their disposal

Ordinary people cannot compete.



~Just my .02 cents. Not sure that it is worth that much~

erinwroteablogyall.blogspot.
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ARCHIMEDESII's Photo ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (202,363)
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5/18/18 12:12 P



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LACOTYA, I saw this chart and think you'll find it very informative.



Things successful people do

compliment
forgive others
accept responsibility for their actions
keep a journal
continuously learn
embrace change
Have a sense of gratitude

Things unsuccessful people do

criticize
blame others for their failures
hold a grudge
secretly hope others fail
never set goals
talk about people
fear change



ARCHIMEDESII's Photo ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (202,363)
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5/18/18 12:00 P



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"So 6 lbs since mid April"

If you're down six pounds since mid April, I'd say that avoiding the snacks from the vending machine, giving up the BBQ chips and not eating as much at night IS making a difference.

I'm also pretty sure the personal trainer told you to do as many rotations as you could in 20-30 minutes. And that they also told you that IF you continue to do the workout 2-3 times per week, in 6-8 weeks, you will see subtle changes, not dramatic ones.

In short, stop expecting overnight miracles.


GOLFGMA's Photo GOLFGMA Posts: 22,596
5/18/18 10:49 A

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do not have this problem

Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. Phil 2:3-4.


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LUANN_IN_PA Posts: 26,976
5/18/18 10:40 A

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"But I'm down another two pounds. So 6 lbs since mid April "

Healthy weight loss is 1 to 2 pounds a week.
So your 6 pounds in 4 weeks is right on track!

"We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand."
~ Randy Pausch

"There's a difference between interest and commitment. When you're interested in doing something, you do it only when circumstance permit. When you're committed to something, you accept no excuses, only results."
~ Art Turock

"We have a saying in Tibet: If a problem can be solved, there is no use worrying about it. If it can't be solved, worrying will do no good."
~ 7 Years in T
LACOYTA Posts: 621
5/18/18 10:20 A

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No one wants advice from me. Would you want advice from a cleaner who needs to lose weight? Of course not. You want advice from someone who's successful and got it together.
To answer your question I'd say," I cut back on eating things from vending machines and eating at night."

Oh, I tired that circuit workout and I still find it challenging and can only get halfway through it. And I woke up with a weird ache in my inner thigh. But I'm down another two pounds. So 6 lbs since mid April emoticon

Edited by: LACOYTA at: 5/18/2018 (10:21)
ARCHIMEDESII's Photo ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (202,363)
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5/18/18 6:00 A



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LACOTYA,

If that's your attitude when people come to you asking for help or advice, no wonder no ones wants to help you declutter.

Let's say a close friend of yours who needed to lose weight came to you and said,"wow, you lost 4 pounds. You look great ! how did you do it ?"

What would you tell them ?

LACOYTA Posts: 621
5/17/18 11:58 P

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That is a good question. No one asks me for advice. I'd probably say" Go figure it out yourself" lame I know.

SHERYLDS's Photo SHERYLDS Posts: 17,605
5/17/18 10:11 P

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LACOYTA ...
if someone else asked you to solve your issue, what would you say to them emoticon

Sheryl, New Jersey EST, SUMMER 5% Challenge-KITCHEN CHAMPIONS


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LACOYTA Posts: 621
5/17/18 11:03 A

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First off, I've made changes. I eat less at night and eat almost nothing out of vending machines at work.
I printed out said workout and still have it. It was only supposed to take 20 minutes to do, but took me closer to an hour (I'm not naturally athletic). So that's why I had problems (and the squat thrusts don't come easy to me- we all have challenging exercises) I wish I was one of those people who like exercise.
These days, it's hard not to imagine yourself as a stunning Instagram sensation. There's so many of them.




ARCHIMEDESII's Photo ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (202,363)
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5/17/18 6:06 A



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LACOTYA was offered free training advice from a fully certified personal trainer.

The trainer created a high intensity workout that could be done in a small space at home in 20-30 minutes. The workout provided didn't need to be done every day, just 2-3 times per week to start along with a daily 30 minute walk.

She asked for a workout that would help slim down her legs. The trainer said they would create a workout that would help build over all strength with an emphasis on gaining lean muscle in their legs/lower body. After a couple of weeks, she wanted to know why the inches weren't dropping off. The trainer had specifically told her not to expect instant results. However, if she did the workout over a 6-8 week period, she would notice subtle changes.

Eventually, LACOTYA made excuses for why she couldn't do the workout or why the workout was too hard. The trainer made modifications. More excuses were provided. She then admitted, she doesn't like exercise.

How do you tell someone who says they want a perfect body that in order to get that body they have to do some work such as exercising regularly. If you don't do the work, you wont get results.

And that's the nutshell, the OP doesn't want to do any work. She wants to take a pill and be instantly slim so that she can be an instagram or FB sensation. She wants a perfect body because she believes that will give her the perfect life.

Edited by: ARCHIMEDESII at: 5/17/2018 (06:13)
ETHELMERZ's Photo ETHELMERZ Posts: 21,490
5/17/18 4:46 A

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Nothing we have said for over two years has “clicked” for you......sorry. It is entirely up to you. Chin up......

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5/16/18 9:53 P

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You don’t find time for exercise, cleaning house, fixing healthy meals, etc....you MAKE time.

SHERYLDS's Photo SHERYLDS Posts: 17,605
5/16/18 8:56 P

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I marvel at working mothers who get so much done and seem so much more organized than I am, and yet just keep going. I think the answer is ...they feel they have to. If something is important to you, you will do it. If you just keep letting it go, it is because it really isn't your priority.

If you just want to hear that other people just feel overwhelmed a lot of the time...be consoled....a lot of us are. The answer to getting over it, is doing something about it, and then trying your best not to go back to old habits.

Edited by: SHERYLDS at: 5/16/2018 (20:57)
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MONKEYDRIVEN's Photo MONKEYDRIVEN Posts: 468
5/16/18 4:13 P

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Hmm.. being lazy isn't your thing, it's just what happens when the week tires you out? I disagree. There are many definitions of lazy but the first that pops up when you google it is "unwilling to work or use energy." Most definitions of lazy are something like: not willing, unwilling, not wanting to use effort.. there is a difference between unwilling and unable.

LUANN_IN_PA Posts: 26,976
5/16/18 3:21 P

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"Isn't it natural to imagine having a trainer, nutritionist, and friends and relatives who'll help me declutter ?"

You can imagine anything you want! It is fun to dream about what could be. :)

But wishes are not reality. You have to do the work yourself.

"We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand."
~ Randy Pausch

"There's a difference between interest and commitment. When you're interested in doing something, you do it only when circumstance permit. When you're committed to something, you accept no excuses, only results."
~ Art Turock

"We have a saying in Tibet: If a problem can be solved, there is no use worrying about it. If it can't be solved, worrying will do no good."
~ 7 Years in T
LACOYTA Posts: 621
5/16/18 2:27 P

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I have gotten rid of tons of stuff. But this place still looks bad.
I watched the video. It was something to think about.

MISSSVJS's Photo MISSSVJS SparkPoints: (41,912)
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5/16/18 2:07 P

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"Isn't it natural to imagine having a trainer, nutritionist, and friends and relatives who'll help me declutter?" Natural? Maybe. Realistic? No way! Why should your friends/relatives help you when you won't help yourself?



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LACOYTA Posts: 621
5/16/18 1:33 P

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I've given up bbq chips. I have lost 5 lbs since mid April. I am very afraid of not being able to lose more because I have so much more to go.
Being lazy isn't my thing, it's just what happens when the week tires you out.
Isn't it natural to imagine having a trainer, nutritionist, and friends and relatives who'll help me declutter ?

KRAFTYKRAFT's Photo KRAFTYKRAFT SparkPoints: (103,507)
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5/16/18 1:26 P

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I found with me it helped to break up the housework I.e. bathroom on Monday evening, laundry on Tuesday so I wasn’t constantly overwhelmed. Also I would break up my workouts - squats as I brushed my teeth, counter pushups as I waited for coffee to brew and I walked as much as possible

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5/16/18 1:23 P

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Have you ever watched Laura Vanderkam's TED talk, "How to gain control of your free time"? It's a real eye-opener. www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3kNlFMXslo



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5/16/18 12:56 P

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You don’t need an hour a day of fitness ever. 30 min is more doable and can be broken up in 10 min increments. But really even starting with a few min and building up as it becomes too easy is the way to go. emoticon



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LUANN_IN_PA Posts: 26,976
5/16/18 12:53 P

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Lots of excuses there! The same excuses you have been using for years too.
We are all busy.
Seriously.
You are not unique in that way at all.

Everyone makes the time to do the things that are most important to them. Since "being lazy" is your thing, it stands to reason that your house is not clean, etc.

"We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand."
~ Randy Pausch

"There's a difference between interest and commitment. When you're interested in doing something, you do it only when circumstance permit. When you're committed to something, you accept no excuses, only results."
~ Art Turock

"We have a saying in Tibet: If a problem can be solved, there is no use worrying about it. If it can't be solved, worrying will do no good."
~ 7 Years in T
ARCHIMEDESII's Photo ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (202,363)
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5/16/18 12:49 P



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LACOTYA,

Are you still eating the BBQ chips when you watch TV at night ? If so, that's one reason you're still 15-20 pounds overweight.

I've said this many times before, losing weight isn't about eating perfectly. it's about learning to make better choices, not perfect ones. You can learn to eat right, you just don't want to.

you haven't hit bottom. What's hitting bottom ? That's when you decide you've had enough. Whatever you're doing isn't working and you know you need to make a change. You're not ready to change and that's why you wont lose weight. It's not about eating right or exercising an hour a day. You just don't want to do the work.

And you know what ? No one can force you or encourage you to do better.

I'm going to give you one piece of advice, then no more replies to this thread.

If you want to lose weight,"STOP eating the BBQ chips". period. If you wont give up the chips, then you're not going to lose the weight. You'll just find excuses to do whatever you want to do regardless of the sound advice the members give you.







MISSSVJS's Photo MISSSVJS SparkPoints: (41,912)
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5/16/18 12:16 P

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Nope - sorry but it sounds like you are making excuses. I'm 60 years old and I go to the gym near my work and work out between 6:45 and 7:45 at least 4 days a week plus I try to walk on my lunch break when the weather is nice. I work full time, Mon.-Fri. - 8 hr. a day. I come home and fix dinner for my husband and me - I cook from scratch and make healthy food (my husband had heart bypass surgery a little over a year ago, so healthy food is a must for us). I also have a garden that I tend several times a week, my house is clean, and my laundry gets done every week. I try to batch cook on the weekends so we have food for our lunches during week. Our "hobby" is going to auctions on the weekend, so we are gone a lot on the weekend. It's all about priority and what's important to you - if losing weight, eating healthy, and exercising is important, you will find the time to do it!

Sorry if this seems harsh, but whenever I read your posts, it's all about what you can't do instead and making excuse after excuse and seeming to expect someone else to do it for you. You are the only one that can improve yourself - no one else can do that for you. You simply have to change your attitude and do it. You don't have to do it all at once - take one thing at a time and do it until it becomes habit and then add another task to that until that becomes habit - but it's totally up to you to make those changes.

Edited by: MISSSVJS at: 5/16/2018 (12:48)


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APPLEIGLOO SparkPoints: (2,316)
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5/16/18 11:12 A

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I can totally get that, something you might want to try is non-zero days. This basically means that you don't have to do anything big, just do something. For example, put away the dishes. Decide to clean for just 5 min, that will make a big difference but it's only 5 min. Same with exercise. Go for a walk for 10 minutes or do a few push ups or crunches at home. I think that if you do something then you'll feel better too.



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MONKEYDRIVEN's Photo MONKEYDRIVEN Posts: 468
5/16/18 10:57 A

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Not currently, but that *has* been the situation before.. for me, it's usually a sign I'm depressed. I say this because it sounds like you don't want to do anything, and can't bring yourself to do anything, and don't have the motivation to do anything.

Even if you don't feel you are clinically depressed, I recommend checking out this blog post that I've always found helpful when I struggle with low mood and low motivation:

captainawkward.com/2014/06/29/guest-post/

LACOYTA Posts: 621
5/16/18 10:21 A

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I feel I'm not home much Monday thru Friday and I'm the weekends I'm too tired to do anything but be lazy. So I don't have time for eating perfectly and working out for an hour a day.
There's still no time for the cleaning that has to be done either. So the house looks bad and I'm 15- 20 lbs overweight.
Can anyone relate to this?

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