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LWLAR7 Posts: 9,659
10/26/17 2:47 A

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Yes

KRISUA's Photo KRISUA SparkPoints: (306,721)
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10/24/17 6:30 A

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But you never have to be in the same form again.



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TOOBAT's Photo TOOBAT SparkPoints: (349)
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10/23/17 8:40 A

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Hey ARCHIMEDESII

Thank you for your kind words and being supportive! You are very right that being thin doesn't equal being happy and beating oneself up makes matters worse.

The shame I felt was a spontaneous reaction to the before-pictures I had just taken. In the best case it will help me assume responsibility and take action, in the worst case it will feed into permanent, paralysing and toxic shame. It's a balancing act, keeping the feeling of shame in check has always been hard for me.

The overeating is one of the symptoms of my self-respect/self-love taking a dip lately. But it's one that I can address directly and actively! With measures and stuff:).

I'm glad I found this site and hope to continue having inspiring interactions with people like you.

PS: Uoh, I just looked at your before/after pictures. So well done!!! Seriously hats off, you are truly inspiring

ARCHIMEDESII's Photo ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (201,401)
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10/23/17 6:25 A



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TOOBAT,

I agree with Ethyl, you have absolutely NOTHING to be ashamed of !! Having gained too much weight and being overweight does NOT make you a bad person.

Too many of us gained weight because we were never taught how to eat or how to watch our portion sizes. This wont be easy, but you need to learn to treat your body with more respect. Not only do we need to learn how to eat better, but we need to learn to how to love ourselves.

You can't keep beating yourself up because you don't look like an Instagram model. If you tell yourself that you wont be happy until you've lost the weight, you will never be happy with yourself or your body.

Don't tie your happiness to your weight. Believe me, there are people who weigh 300 pounds who are unhappy the weigh they look. And guess what, there are women who weigh 110 pounds and wear a size 2 and are unhappy with their weight.

In order to lose weight, you need to learn to take better care of yourself inside and out. And that takes time.




ETHELMERZ's Photo ETHELMERZ Posts: 21,192
10/23/17 4:14 A

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Make an appointment with a real dietitian who sees you face to face, that can help a lot and get the “shaming” urge out of you. Do you “shame” others who have chronic addiction? Overeating is a chronic condition. We found our dietition helped the most. Wishing you success!

TOOBAT's Photo TOOBAT SparkPoints: (349)
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10/23/17 1:42 A

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Thank you ARCHIMEDESII, for the next few days those before pictures will shame me into eating less and once that wears off I hope the goals I set yesterday and being in contact with people in the same situation will keep me going. All the best to you:)

TOOBAT's Photo TOOBAT SparkPoints: (349)
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10/23/17 1:39 A

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Congratulations on your success, SUITABLE, that is impressive and motivating!

ARCHIMEDESII's Photo ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (201,401)
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10/22/17 4:20 P



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TOOBAT,

We have all been in your shoes. At one time, I wore a size 16-18. I thought I was average. Isn't a size 12 the average size for a typical American woman ? I knew I needed to lose a few, but didn't think I was "that" fat.

Well, as I progressed through my own journey, I had to learn to accept that I was morbidly obese when I decided something needed to change. That was my past.

You can't change the past, but you CAN influence and change the future. The before photo you took is your starting point. When you've lost the weight and look at it, you'll be amazed how far you progressed.

SUITABLE's Photo SUITABLE Posts: 5,959
10/22/17 3:21 P

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See my profile.



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LADYSTARWIND's Photo LADYSTARWIND SparkPoints: (85,122)
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10/22/17 12:24 P

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...and now you are past that denial! Its actually a very empowering step to take since (unaddressed) fears hold us from moving forward. Now that part is over, you can breathe easy, and simply start focusing on several simple changes you can commit to.
Every Journey starts in a different way, for a different reason. Keep looking forward and don't focus on those negatives in your past. In fact...forgive yourself for that part...and accept that you know it isn't "the real you". All the best,
patti

Patti
"The only thing we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us."
Gandalf: Lord of the Rings


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TOOBAT's Photo TOOBAT SparkPoints: (349)
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10/22/17 12:13 P

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So I just took a "before" picture. I've been avoiding looking at myself undressed, wearing mostly baggy clothes, sucking my stomach in and systematically refusing to acknowledge the issue.

How did I let it get this far, I feel terrible and like this is not my body at all.

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