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SUNSHINE65's Blogs

Wisdom of Larry the Cable Guy:
Saturday, March 03, 2012      8 comments

1. A day without sunshine is like night. 2. On the other hand, you have different fingers. 3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot. 4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name. 5. Remember, half the p... Read more
Inventions Bound to Fail
Friday, March 02, 2012      9 comments

*The water-proof towel *Glow in the dark sunglasses *Solar powered flashlights *Submarine screen doors *A book on how to read *Inflatable dart boards *A dictionary index *Dehydrated water - Just add wate... Read more
Deep Thoughts About Pigs and Sheep
Thursday, March 01, 2012      3 comments

- Do you think sheep know when you're pulling the wool over their eyes? - Does the person who inventories sheep often fall asleep on the job? - If a pig is sold to the pawn shop is it then called a ham-hock? - If we make sweaters out of a... Read more
Dark Sucker
Thursday, March 01, 2012      1 comments

For years, it has been believed that electric bulbs emit light, but recent information has proved otherwise. Electric bulbs don't emit light; they suck dark. Thus, we call these bulbs Dark Suckers. The Dark Sucker Theory and the existence ... Read more
Funny Ads
Wednesday, February 29, 2012      7 comments

These are advertisements that have appeared in papers across the country (or so we are led to believe) - Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the Serena Lodge. Swim in the lovely pool while you drink it all in. - The hotel ... Read more
Funny Signs
Sunday, February 26, 2012      11 comments

On a Septic Tank Truck: Yesterday's Meals on Wheels ************************** At an Optometrist's Office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place." ************************** On a Plumber's truck:... Read more
A Good Pun is Its Own Reword
Sunday, February 26, 2012      10 comments

- A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking. - Dijon vu - the same mustard as before. - Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death. - A hangover is the wrath of grapes. - Sea captains don't like crew cuts. - ... Read more
Saturday, February 25, 2012      2 comments

A man went into the pet shop, "I am playing Long John Silver in the local amateur dramatic societies version of Treasure Island and need a parrot to sit on my shoulder," he said. "I don't have any parrots at the moment, but you wouldn't wan... Read more
Saturday, February 25, 2012      4 comments

1. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view. 2. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist. 3. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. 4. An... Read more
Cook's Helper
Saturday, February 25, 2012      0 comments

If it's too small to read, click this link:
es/pickles/ ... Read more
The Family Maid
Tuesday, February 21, 2012      5 comments

A husband and his wife advertised for a live-in maid to cook and do the housework. A likely-looking girl came in from the country, and they hired her. 

 She worked out fine, was a good cook, was polite, and kept the house neat.... Read more
Allee Oop!
Tuesday, February 21, 2012      6 comments

A champion jockey is about to enter an important race on a new horse. The horse's trainer meets him before the race and says, "All you have to remember with this horse is that every time you approach a jump, you have to shout, 'ALLLLEEE OOOP!' r... Read more
You Are What You Eat
Monday, February 20, 2012      5 comments

Two friends went out to dinner. They were reading through the menu when one friend remarked to the other that scientist say we are what we eat. The other friend replied, "I don't know if that's true, but let's err on the side of caut... Read more
Mixed metaphors
Sunday, February 19, 2012      2 comments

English professors love to catch the errors students make in their term papers, and they love nothing better than to catch mixed metaphors. The "friends and survivors" of Calvin College English department collected this list of mixed metaphors a... Read more
Mary Lou
Saturday, February 18, 2012      3 comments

Lisa came up behind her husband while he was drinking his morning coffee and slapped him on the back of the head. "Ow!" Larry exclaimed. "What was that for?" "I found a piece of paper in your pants with the name 'Mary Lou' written on... Read more

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