ILOVEROSES
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ILOVEROSES's Blogs

A night at an expensive hotel.
Tuesday, June 19, 2018      19 comments

A not-so-rich couple decide to stay at a very exclusive hotel for a night. The manager immediately recognises they aren't wealthy, but can't throw them out so instead he decides to be clever. In the morning the couple go to settle to t... Read more
A mission to Mars.
Sunday, June 17, 2018      19 comments

NASA was interviewing professionals to be sent on a mission to Mars. Only one could go and they wouldn’t return to Earth. The first applicant, an engineer, was asked how much he wanted to be paid for going. “$1 million,” he answered, “... Read more
A blonde wanting to buy a TV set.
Friday, June 15, 2018      26 comments

A blonde goes to a nearby store and asks the clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner. The clerk looks at her and says that she doesn’t serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black. The next day she returns to the store and... Read more
The classic things our parents said to us as kids.
Tuesday, June 12, 2018      21 comments

You probably hated them at the time, but nothing beats the classic things our parents used when we were growing up. Back in the 1950s and ‘60s, there was no hiding behind a keyboard or phone and some of the most memorable and hilarious quot... Read more
Customs declaration!
Sunday, June 10, 2018      18 comments

A very distinguished lady was filling out her customs form as the plane prepared to land. She was seated next to a friendly priest and asked for his help. "Excuse me Father, could I ask a favour?" she asked To which he replied: "Of cou... Read more
Suitcase too big!
Sunday, June 10, 2018      25 comments

The flight attendant watched a passenger try to stuff his hopelessly overloaded bags into the overhead storage. Finally, she informed him that he would have to check the oversized luggage. "When I fly other airlines," he said irritably... Read more
Holiday in Scotland.
Thursday, June 07, 2018      22 comments

A husband and wife were traveling on holiday in Scotland. As they approached Kirkcudbright, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town. The argument raged until they stopped for lunch. As they stood in the restaurant, t... Read more
Loving neighbours.
Tuesday, June 05, 2018      24 comments

One evening a wife drew her husband’s attention to the couple next door. “Do you see that couple?” she asked. “They look so devoted. He kisses her every time they meet! Why don’t you do that?” “I would love to,” replied the husband, “b... Read more
A man and a dog going on a holiday.
Sunday, June 03, 2018      21 comments

A man wrote a letter to a small hotel in a town he planned to visit on his holiday. He wrote: "I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is well-groomed and very well-behaved. Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my roo... Read more
The Magician and the parrot.
Friday, June 01, 2018      19 comments

A magician worked on a cruise ship emoticon . The audience was different each week, so the magician did the ... Read more
French holiday.
Wednesday, May 30, 2018      24 comments

A man decided to travel to France. He assumed that most French people would speak English. The man bought a train ticket and hopped onto a train. A ticket inspector, who only spoke French, began talking to him. Not understanding, he simply ... Read more
Not flying to New York!
Tuesday, May 29, 2018      30 comments

A blonde woman boards a plane to New York with a ticket for the economy section. She looks at the seats in economy and then looks into the front of the cabin at the first-class seats. Seeing that the first-class seats appear to be much larg... Read more
An affair.
Sunday, May 27, 2018      21 comments

Mary and Jack were watching TV when the phone rang. Mary left him on the couch to answer the phone and was back in a few seconds. “Who was it?” Jack asked. “My husband,” she replied. “I better get going,” he said.”Where was ... Read more
Just missed it!
Friday, May 25, 2018      22 comments

A group of tourists arrived at Runnymede. Gathering around the tour guide, they listened intently as he said, "This is the exact spot where the barons forced King John to sign the Magna Carta. How amazing!" One of the members of the group y... Read more
The Morning After.
Wednesday, May 23, 2018      16 comments

The morning after their wedding a couple finally woke up at the first rays of light. The wife was so impressed with her husband’s performance the previous night that she asked him a question “Darling, you are just wonderful. Last night... Read more

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