250,000-299,999 SparkPoints 289,035


Friday, August 17, 2012      19 comments

A VIRUS is going round called Housework. If you feel the need to start housework - Stop Immediately!! This virus affects your sleep and wipes out your social life. It causes you to be late for luncheons with friends and disrup... Read more
Oops From the Olympics
Thursday, August 16, 2012      24 comments

Thank you margemf: Here are the top nine comments made by NBC sports commentators during the Summer Olympics that they would like to take back: 1. Weightlifting commentator: "This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch thi... Read more
Cup Holder
Wednesday, August 15, 2012      20 comments

Thank to margemf: True story from a Novell NetWire SysOp: Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?" Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?" Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty period. H... Read more
Tuesday, August 14, 2012      19 comments

PARAPROSDOKIANS (say that fast three times)... (Winston Churchill loved them.) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous. 1. Where there's a will, I want to... Read more
Car Keys
Monday, August 13, 2012      21 comments

Several days ago as I left a meeting at a hotel; I desperately gave myself a personal pat down. I was looking for my keys. They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing. Suddenly I realized I must... Read more
Black Bras
Friday, August 10, 2012      15 comments

A Chinese guy goes to a Jewish guy to buy black bras, Size 38. The Jewish guy, known for his skills as a businessman, says that black bras are rare and that he is finding it very difficult to buy them from his suppliers. Ther... Read more
Never Squat With Your Spurs On
Thursday, August 09, 2012      24 comments

Will Rogers , who died in a 1935 plane crash, was one of the greatest political sages this country has ever known. Some of his sayings: 1. Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco. 2. Never kick ... Read more
Man Problems
Wednesday, August 08, 2012      19 comments

Woman has Man in it; Mrs. has Mr. in it; Female has Male in it; She has He in it; Madam has Adam in it; Okay, Okay, it all makes sense now... I never looked at it this way before: Ever notice how all of ... Read more
Get Out!
Tuesday, August 07, 2012      22 comments

My wife was screaming at me: "Leave!! Get out of this house!" she ordered. As I was walking out the door she yelled, "I hope you die a slow and painful death!" So I turned around and replied "So now you want me to stay?" ... Read more
I Fish!
Monday, August 06, 2012      25 comments

After 35 years of marriage, a husband and wife came in for counseling. When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the years they had been married. On and on and on: neglect, l... Read more
The Animal Test
Sunday, August 05, 2012      18 comments

There are 4 questions. Don't miss one. 1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Stop and think about it and decide on your answer before you scroll down. The cor... Read more
Filled Rooms
Saturday, August 04, 2012      19 comments

Thanks again to margemf: By the time the soldier pulled into the little town, every hotel room was taken. "You've got to have a room somewhere", he pleaded with a proprietor. "Well, I do have a double room with one occupant, but he is an... Read more
Would You Marry Again?
Friday, August 03, 2012      20 comments

Would You Marry Again? A husband and wife are sitting quietly in bed reading when the Wife looks over at him and asks the question..... WIFE: "What would you do if I died... Read more
It's A Guy Thing
Thursday, August 02, 2012      21 comments

The wife left a note on our fridge: "It's not working! I can't take it anymore. I've gone to stay at my Mom's!" I opened the fridge. The light came on, and the beer was cold. God only knows what she was talking about. ... Read more
It's So Hot in the Midwest......
Wednesday, August 01, 2012      16 comments

IT'S SO HOT in the midwest...... ....the birds have to use potholders to pull the worms out of the ground. .....the trees are whistling for the dogs. .....the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance w... Read more

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