A Big Fat Groaner
A papa mole, a mama mole, and a baby mole,
all live together in a little mole hole.
One day, papa mole sticks his head
out of the hole, sniffs the air and said,
' Yummy! I smell maple syrup!'
The mama mole sticks her head... Read more
While I sat in the reception area of my doctor's office, a woman rolled an elderly man in a wheelchair into the room. As she went to the receptionist's desk, the man sat there, alone and silent. Just as I was thinking I should make sma... Read more
'Cash, check or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet, I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
'So, do you always carry your TV remote?' I asked.
'... Read more
The Pastor's Ass
The Pastor's Ass
The Pastor entered his donkey in a race and
The Pastor was so pleased with the donkey
that he entered it in the
race again and it won again.
The local paper read:
... Read more
Chili Cookoff (Long but really funny)
New Mexico Chili Cook-off This is an actual account as relayed to paramedics at a chili cook-off in New Mexico .
Note: Please take time to read this slowly. If you pay attention to the first two judges,
the reaction of the third j... Read more
This must be a Wisconsin joke!
At some point in a guy's life.... it comes down to this....
Four guys have been going on the same fishing trip for many years.
Two days before the group is to leave, Herm's wife puts h... Read more
I've seen two shows lately that went on and on about how mid-life is a great time for women. Just last week Oprah had a whole show on how great menopause will be . Puhleeeeeeeze! I've had a few thoughts of my own and would like to share them ... Read more
Italian Business Strategies
Subject: Italian Business Strategies
Luigi (the father) says to his son ...'I want you to marry a girl of my
The son says, 'I will choose my own bride!!!'
Luigi says, 'But the girl is Bill Gates' daughter... Read more
A 6 year old and a 4 year old are raking the yard.
The 6 year old asks, "You know what? I think it's about time we started learning to cuss."The 4 year old nods his head in approval.
The 6 year old continues, "When we go in for breakfa... Read more
The only way to pull off a Sunday afternoon "quickie" with their 8-year-old son in the apartment was to send him out on the balcony with a Popsicle and tell him to report on all the neighborhood activities to keep him occupied.
... Read more
Wine vrs. Water
I'll still drink my water!
To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine... And those who don't and are always seen with a bottle of water in their hand. As Ben Franklin said: In wine there is wisdom, In beer there is freedom, In water there is b... Read more
Man and Police Officer
A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says,' I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir.'
The driver says, 'Gee, officer, I had it on cruise control at 60; perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating. '
Not looking up... Read more
Two of the Best Comebacks
TWO OF THE BEST COMEBACK RESPONSES Ever
If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman. He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial. The lawyer was trying to und... Read more
The Blonde and the Frog
Thanks again to SFriend margemf who keeps me supplied with jokes.
A blonde goes into her local pet shop in search of an exotic pet .
As she looks about the store, she notices a box full of frogs.
The sign on the b... Read more
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One afternoon, a lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw two men along the road-side eating grass.
Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and got out to investigate.
He asked one man, "Why are you eating grass?"
"We don't have a... Read more