2ABBYNORMAL

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2ABBYNORMAL's Blogs

Four Catholic men and a woman
Wednesday, December 12, 2012      18 comments

Four Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee. The first Catholic man tells his friends, "My son is a priest, when he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'." The second Catholic man chirps, "My son is a Bishop. Whe... Read more
Charm School
Tuesday, December 11, 2012      9 comments

Two ladies were having a picnic in a park. The first one says, "See my new diamond ring? My husband bought it for me." The second one says, "Oh, that's nice! That's very, very good!" The first one says, "And see that shiny new Jaguar p... Read more
No Ice!
Saturday, December 08, 2012      9 comments

Rum & ice will ruin your liver. Whiskey & ice will ruin your heart. Gin & ice will ruin your brain. Pepsi & ice will ruin your teeth. Apparently ice is lethal!!! Beer is OK , no ice! ... Read more
Little Johnny jokes-Definitely
Thursday, December 06, 2012      10 comments

The teacher asked little Johnny to use the word " definitely " in a sentence. Little Johnny replies, "Teacher, do farts have lumps in them?" The Teacher says, "Of course not Johnny," To which Johnny replies, "Then I have definitel... Read more
If My Body Was A Car!
Thursday, December 06, 2012      13 comments

If my body was a car, this is the time I would be thinking about trading it in for a newer model. I've go bumps and dents and scratches in my finish and my paint job is getting a little dull...But that's not the worst of it. My headlight... Read more
The Carpenter
Monday, December 03, 2012      11 comments

Once upon a time, two brothers who lived on adjoining farms fell into conflict. It was the first serious rift in 40 years of farming side-by-side, sharing machinery and trading labor and goods as needed without a hitch. Then the long col... Read more
Moose Hunting
Sunday, December 02, 2012      10 comments

These two hunters went moose hunting every year without success. Finally they came up with a foolproof plan. (emphasis on fool) They got themselves a very authentic cow moose costume and learned the mating call of a cow moose. ... Read more
The Mightiest
Saturday, December 01, 2012      9 comments

A lion woke up one morning feeling really rowdy and mean. He went out and cornered a small monkey, and roared, "Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?" The trembling monkey says, "You are, mighty lion!" Later, the lion confron... Read more
3 Elderly Ladies
Thursday, November 29, 2012      14 comments

One afternoon three elderly ladies were sitting around a table enjoying tea. One woman said to the others "you know, sometimes I find myself in front of the fridge with a jar of mayonaise in my hand, and can't remember if I am supposed to ... Read more
Update on Rebecca
Monday, November 26, 2012      8 comments

This is an update on my niece, Rebecca, who has the brain tumor. She still has Bell's Palsy on the left side of her face. Her left eyelid won't stay open so they have her wearing an eye patch. I don't know the reason behind that. ... Read more
Good News/Bad News
Saturday, November 24, 2012      12 comments

Two 90-year-old women, Rose and Barb, had been friends all of their lives. When it was clear that Rose was dying, Barb visited her every day. One day Barb said, "Rose, we both loved playing women's softball all our lives, and we played all throu... Read more
Male or Female?
Tuesday, November 20, 2012      17 comments

Male or Female? You might not have known this, but a lot of non-living objects are actually either male or female. Here are some examples: FREEZER BAGS They are male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them. ... Read more
Flowers
Saturday, November 17, 2012      12 comments

Two friends, a blonde and a redhead, are walking down the street and pass a flower shop where the redhead sees her boyfriend buying flowers. The redhead sighs and says, "Oh crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers again." The blonde l... Read more
Thank You
Thursday, November 15, 2012      10 comments

Thank you, everyone, for your well wishes, prayers and words of encouragement during my sadness with my niece's, Rebecca, brain tumor sadness. Rebecca now has Bell's Palsy. Her face is still droopy, her left ear is permanently disabled a... Read more
Inner Peace
Tuesday, November 13, 2012      11 comments

On a lighter spirit today. I'm passing this on because it worked for me this morning. A doctor on TV said, "that in order to have inner peace in our lives after this election, we should always finish things that we start". Since we ... Read more

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