I found the right book for now
Monday, May 17, 2021
Forgiving what you can’t forget. I can identify so much with lysa as the more our pain consumes us, the more it will control us. As lonely as it is, I would rather be where I am now and have no friends than go back to where I was. At the visitation, funeral, cemetery there is closure and goodbye. With friendships it’s the emptiness, loss, sorrow and the awkward unexpected unplanned running into them, or keeping peace at a family gathering small talk of not getting to personal and setting boundaries. Or my sister, who claimed to be my best friend, which is someone I love, but I don’t like or want to even be connected with as I see how viscous, mean and cruel she has become. I need to move on and get past this and I am beginning to let go.