This is my take on that popular Instagram meme - how it started, how it's going.
How I'm doing - is not great but okay today. I started to write here a few days ago, and never finished. Just as well. It was a blog reflective of my mood, mindset, feelings - negative, discouraged, and sad. I was able to process some stuff with my therapist on Thursday and get some better sleep, so that has helped.
I've been struggling with the medication that I'm on to prevent a re-occurrence of breast cancer. The side effects I've been experiencing are muscle aches (normal), trouble sleeping, and irritability. I think those last two go together but my oncologist told me those aren't typical side effects. Well, I have been climbing the walls for the past few weeks since I first started. My poor husband has been the recipient of my short temper and general annoyance at everything he does, including walking, talking, breathing. I did warn him; I could tell right away that I was experiencing some mood changes. I have a followup with the oncologist on Monday so hope to discuss further. I am a bit better the past 2 days. I changed the time of day when I take it and perhaps the SEs are wearing off the longer I am on it.
Another factor that has probably influenced my mood is being disappointed by several friends. No point in going into detail; I was just surprised at the lack of support while I was going through all of this. I mean, not even a text, a card or a call. Neither live close, but we've known each other for a very long time. Another friend informed me she has no intention of getting the vaccine. I'm not surprised but it has created a wedge between us, for me. I guess that all that has transpired over the past year - the pandemic, the election, and the issues of racial justice - as well as my own personal health issues - have made me re-think who I spend my time and energy on. I don't have a lot of it.
I am participating in one virtual event, which has been fun. There's a different course along the American River Parkway each week, and the main draw has been finding new trails and places to explore. I've been doing it with my husband and another friend. It was exciting that I saw runners doing the American River 50 miler this morning, as the route goes along our regular walking trail. It looks like the Western States 100 mile Endurance Run will take place, and I'm set to volunteer again at Mile 80. We are planning on meeting some of Ken's cousins in Tahoe in June. So there is definitely more to look forward to this year than last.
I also applied to be part of an adult fitness class for cancer survivors and that will run through the summer. Good timing, as my art class is over next week. I sure have enjoyed it! And plan on practicing during the summer months.
We are back to watching the Handmaid's Tale which is great. We finished Borgen, also fantastic, but we are running out of things to watch! There is some really bad stuff on Netflix and Amazon. I'd rather read. I have read about 20 books so far this year. I recently read www.amazon.com/B
which was incredible.
We are doing a bit of yard work but probably no garden. Too much work and water given how little success we've had!
Hope you all are well, healthy, and thriving. Thank you for reading.