TWISTEDSTEELE
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Season 21

Sunday, April 25, 2021

Everyday I have to find a way to motor my motivate myself it's not easy cuz there's so many ways to get this right and I'm not sure which one to go with and stay with because every time I think I find the answer I uncover new questions this is better that is better oh that whole way is not right go this way it's very confusing but I do know one thing I'm not giving up I'm going to keep fighting I'm going to keep stroking stroking and I'm going to fight this to the end the goal is 250 lb at about 5 15% body fat we've never seen me anywhere near that I've never been this size at 6 ft 3 I've been bigger I fought back and forth from $536 back to 400 and stayed back and forth in this round for it seems like forever but I'm determined to get out of the 400s I swear to that this year and even further I have a trip coming up I went to Dominican Republic 2 years ago I went on a cruise little over a year ago mobility carts off of those who need it I don't want to be one of those anymore I want to enjoy mobility and freedom so every day that's my motivation I often ask myself what's my why the reason I keep going enjoying life I lost another friend this past week Eddie and I we almost started out together I met this brother and kindergarten and he didn't we dealt with weight we were big kids big for our ages or big for our ages is what they call us but he dealt with it he also got cancer and I just lost them a week ago on the 13th of May I don't have cancer I got another I got enough other problems but living my best life is my goal I worked a lot I put a lot of overtime in I lost a lot of family time or down time because I'd rather work cuz I got a gross love for money I'm learning to work smarter and not harder and the fruits of my labor are sitting in the bank growing right now on their own so a means of taking care of myself I've taken care of that but now that I've accumulated a little bit of a nest egg I don't want to use that to pay for medical treatment because I can't control the food and the things that I put in my mouth so I'm ready to work up a sweat I haven't had a good sweat from hard work and many years rebuilding this body is my goal right now I often think about the six million Dollar Man Steve Austin a man barely alive feel like I was in his boots only did not put me back together with bionics hard work is going to put me back together learning to control this body which I'm blessed with and building it up so that it can sustain and tolerate life my brother told me about a book that he said should help me get my motivation my mojo together it's called the pleasure trap by Douglas j Fisk and Alan gold something this book I think is going to help me address making the better choices giving up the momentary pleasure on the lips and doing what it takes to get that real pleasure that I crave and yearn for I can just say God work with me
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    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.
 

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