Thursday, February 25, 2021
Rode the bike 5 miles, walked one mile, managed to actually cook a low calorie meal for the family. Baked fish, shrimp and rice pilaf. Something everyone can enjoy. The days are long! Oh, so long.
Can't wait to get past this starting period, maybe I shouldn't call it a starting period, that would mean there is a finish. There isn't a finish, its a lifestyle, forever diet, a constant struggle, a challenge...... I'm literally getting overwhelmed and discouraged at the thoughts this is bringing up in me. The forever, God will I ever just be normal? I look at other people who just stay a constant weight and I wonder how? They don't frigging constantly think about it. I know they don't, sure some do, but the ones I'm thinking of just eat normal, hungry....eat...content..done. What the hell happened to me and when? Better yet why? Why do some of us struggle so hard and for all our lives? I'm just really getting frustrated while I'm blogging. Just being honest here. I know, I might look a little psycho right now..lol. but I'm being serious. Statistically, most people gain back the weight within 5 years, so that is me. About 4 times now! Okay, peace im done for the day.... day 4!