jokes and arthritics
Friday, October 23, 2020
If your back and joints hurt, you’re not alone because bone and joint ailments are some of the most common problems facing millions of people around the world. Bone and Joint Health National Action Week is the best source for information on causes and prevention of musculoskeletal conditions. This event takes place on October 12-20 each year. Bone and Joint Action Week centers around discussions on preventing and treating arthritis, back pain, trauma, pediatric conditions affecting bones, and osteoporosis.
Do you have any bone and joint issues? Yes, I have arthritics in both knees .If you do, what do you do to relieve pain and allow for better movement and flexibility? I tale Tylenol when the pain is bad. I also exercise every day.
I do seated exercises if the pain is bad .Also I do heat therapy in the shower. I let the warm water hit the painful area on your body. That seems to soothe it. I take Turmeric everyday.
THOUGHTS TO GET YOU THROUGH ANY CRISIS
• Indecision is the key to flexibility.
• There is absolutely NO substitute for a genuine lack of preparation.
• Happiness is merely the remission of pain.
• Nostalgia isn’t what it used to be.
• Sometimes too much to drink is not enough.
• The facts, although they may be interesting, are irrelevant.
• The careful application of terror is also a form of communication.
• Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.
• Things are more like they are today than they ever were before.
• Anything worth fighting for is worth fighting dirty for.
• Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler.
• Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
• This is probably as bad as it can get, but don’t count on it.
• If you think that there’s good in everyone, you haven’t met everyone.
• If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
• By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
• Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that live is serious.
Returning from her vacation, the young secretary was telling anyone
who would listen about what a fun time she had. She then asked for two
weeks leave in which to get married.
"But you just had two weeks off," said the boss. "Why didn't you get
married then ?"
"What and ruin my vacation ?" she whined.
Special Classes for Men
1. Class 1: How to Fill Up the Ice Cube Trays.
Step by Step, with Slide Presentation. Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2
hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
2. Class 2: The Toilet Paper Roll. Does it Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion. Meets 2 weeks, Saturdays 12:00 for 2 hours.
3. Class 4: Fundamental Differences Between the Laundry Hamper and the Floor.
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics. Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.
5. Class 5: After Dinner Dishes. Can They Levitate and Fly Into the Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
6. Class 6: Loss of Identity - Losing the Remote to Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups. Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00PM.
7. Class 7: Learning How to Find Things - Starting with looking in the right places
instead of turning the house upside down while screaming.
Open Forum. Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.
8. Class 8: Health Watch - Bringing her flowers is not harmful to your health.
Graphics and Audio Tapes. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00PM for 2 hours.
9. Class 9: Real Men ask for Directions When Lost.
Real Life Testimonials. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.
10. Class 10: Is it genetically impossible to sit quietly while she parallel parks?
Driving Simulations. 4 weeks, Saturdays at noon, 2 hours.
11. Class 11: Learning to Live - Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and role-playing. Location and times to be announced.
12. Class 12: How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion. Relaxation Exercises, Meditation
and Breathing Techniques.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
13. Class 13: How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy - Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and
Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going to be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered. Three nights; Monday,
Wednesday, Friday at 7:00PM for 2 hours.
14. Class 14: The Stove/Oven - What it is and How it is Used.
Live Demonstration. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined
One day a blonde went into Wal-Mart and saw something she liked.
The Blonde asked the clerk what it was. The Clerk said it was a
thermous. What does the thermos do? It keeps hot things hot
and cold things cold. So she bought one. The blonde brought it to
work one day and the blondes boss who also is a blonde said what
is that thing? It is a thermos the first blonde said. What does
it do? Keeps hot things hot and cold things cold. What do you have
in it? I have coffee and a popcycle in it.