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Staying the course

Friday, August 07, 2020

Last night was tough. I read to my sister awhile before going to bed. That should have prepared my brain for sleeping. My brain wouldn't shut down. After an hour, I got back up and started working at my desk.

I wanted to munch. I knew where I was with calories. I was staying on my plan. I did not want to break the streak. While it is not an all-or-nothing journey, indulging takes a great bite out of motivation.

My mind started on the old stinking thinking routine: It really doesn't matter. What does one bite hurt?

I did not get up and go to the kitchen. I grumpily told myself I would be glad in the morning if I stayed the course.
And I am.

I have ups and downs. There are times where I am not tempted at all. There are times I grow weary of staying the course even though I have kept the plan simple. Even though it is a lifestyle and second-nature, urges for unplanned indulgences can still happen.
Apathy is a big enemy. I lose focus, especially when I am tired or discouraged or stressed. It seems pointless. I have been on this journey too long without lasting results.

Losing 77 pounds from May through December 2019 reminds me that I can do this. When people tell me that it gets harder as we age, they may be right. However I will not accept that I must stay at this weight.
Success is not impossible.

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