Monday, April 06, 2020
I had a very, very mild sniffle/stuffy nose and even milder funny throat feeling yesterday morning, so I opted to take a day off given my super hard effort on Saturday. I haven't done a true race effort like that in years, and it probably went beyond "immune system boosting" to "immune system taxing," so it's not too surprising I felt some effects.
I'm not normally so paranoid about getting sick. Even now, I'm kind of "well, it will be what it will be" for myself and just taking a healthy does of caution. BUT... Paranoia really kicks in at the thought of making M sick if I get sick. So any little symptom gets viewed through a different lens - is this *something*? Is this a symptom of IT? Do I need to tell M and self-isolate for a bit?
Yesterday I decided it didn't rise to that level. So, we had a 2nd lovely day of chilling and binging a show, enjoying dinner together along the way.
I normally find it hard to binge. Some things are just emotionally exhausting for me (Handmaid's Tale, as good as it is, *definitely* was), especially if I strongly identify with a character or theme (e.g., the treatment of women in Handmaid's Tale), and I have trouble watching more than an episode at a time. With other shows, I get a bit of something (?) where I just have trouble with the time... how much longer.... I check watch constantly... even if I *enjoy* the show, there's a problem with committing to it... I get anxious about something going badly on the show and don't want to watch it through (I get that with a basketball game, too, where I can't stand to watch my team lose so I switch away if they get behind or even ahead but not by much). It helps to break it up mentally (hence my checking my watch often) and do constant math (5 minutes done, 45 minute show, I'm 1/9 of the way done, ..., constantly - kinda like I do on a lot of my runs :)).
But sometimes... I immerse and just enjoy letting the show play out in front of me. I don't need any kind of check... I don't really worry about HOW it's going to end, just enjoy watching it happen. I'm not incredibly emotionally invested in, or identifying with, any of the characters, but I'm enjoying the overall plot. War of the Worlds was such a series. So M & I watched the entire first season (8 episodes) over Saturday and Sunday.
I completely immerse and was "out of this world" for a while. It was great and JUST the mental break I needed.
Of course, the stuffed pizza we had came back to haunt me last night and I had heartburn (which I hardly ever have!) all night. Sleep was horrible... My sleep-tracking gadgets were very unhappy with me. I still have a bit of sniffle (VERY mild) and the resting HR/HRV "offness" makes me thing "could it be a symptom?" On the other hand, not sleeping well and having heartburn (and apparently having eaten too much too close to bed?) could explain those very well!
Unfortunately, I lack a thermometer. We have some Kinsa thermometers ordered but I'm not sure when they will arrive. It's impossible to find one in stock, so I ordered one from Amazon that SHOULD arrive Friday. Until then, to avoid paranoia about symptoms, I'm going to self-isolate in "my" space (bedroom/bathroom), only entering the common space (e.g. to go out to run) when necessary and while wearing some kind of face covering, until M is up and can do a "manual fever check" (yea, hand to forehead isn't ideal, but....). Once I have a thermometer, I'll start checking that every morning. That and self-monitoring for REAL symptoms (e.g., loss of sense of smell - which hasn't happened, more severe other symptoms, cough that can't be attributed to my asthma, etc.) will do a lot to relieve my paranoia since my concern isn't so much for myself but for passing on anything I might catch.
So... I've settled that... and had one day with another today of total rest... and had a lovely couple of days with a lot of total absence from the world... Now I'm reclining by a window through which I can see a sunny day and blue sky - with the potential for some serious time on our balcony once it warms up a bit - and ready to dig back into the current work project.
Positive thoughts & gratitude to all! So many are out there doing so much and the vast majority of us are at least taking the steps to protect each other. I thank you all - and truly hope for the absolute best for you all in the hard days to come this week.