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AIM TO BE GOOD ENOUGH NOT PERFECT - Self-Care September 9/11

Wednesday, September 11, 2019

Good enough is like a curse word to me. I strive for perfection. Just a simple typo on line or accidental email/post sent gets my adrenaline going. I can't tell you how many thank you cards I have destroyed because my writing wasn't perfect or I didn't say something quite right. I guess that is why I have high blood pressure.

You might think this extreme attention to detail stems from OCD (maybe a little touch), but I think it stems from an innate belief of not being good enough, However, in defense of myself, part of me wants the best for the other person's pleasure.

Getting back on track - aim to be good enough. Actually I had the opportunity to practice this exercise today. I accidently sent 2 emails instead of one and made mistakes on some of my posts, but instead of self-flagellation or making a big deal out of it, I made the conscious effort to laugh it off and think to myself so what - it's good enough. Now I'm not at a point where I would intentionally make a mistake to counteract my striving for perfection.

Culturally, I believe we perceive perfectionism as a positive, but the world is not black & white. I recently read a quote that I would like to share from C. JoyBell C. who blogs and describes herself as a philosophical essayist & cultural critic.

“For everything in this journey of life we are on, there is a right wing and a left wing:
for the wing of love there is anger;
for the wing of destiny there is fear;
for the wing of pain there is healing;
for the wing of hurt there is forgiveness;
for the wing of pride there is humility;
for the wing of giving there is taking;
for the wing of tears there is joy;
for the wing of rejection there is acceptance;
for the wing of judgment there is grace;
for the wing of honor there is shame;
for the wing of letting go there is the wing of keeping.

We can only fly with two wings and two wings can only stay in the air if there is a balance. Two beautiful wings is perfection. There is a generation of people who idealize perfection as the existence of only one of these wings every time. But I see that a bird with one wing is imperfect. An angel with one wing is imperfect. A butterfly with one wing is dead. So this generation of people strive to always cut off the other wing in the hopes of embodying their ideal of perfection, and in doing so, have created a crippled race.”
― C. JoyBell C.
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